So, Who’s on YOUR Celebrity Freebie List?

Last night, on HBO’s new critically acclaimed series, Treme . . .

 . . . two characters, currently in a romantic relationship with one another, were discussing the concept of “Monogamy with Exceptions.”

NO!  Not YOUR type of “exceptions!”  Nice try, Tiger!

The “exceptions” to which this couple was referring were “celebrity exceptions.”  Namely, the couple agreed that each of them could choose three famous individuals that, if given the opportunity, they could proposition for sex, without being considered to have “cheated” by the other person.  Their discussion was highly intriguing (for me, anyway).  And, while watching it, I couldn’t help but be reminded of ANOTHER show, where a television couple entered into a similar sort of “agreement.”

(Click the internal link to view this fun clip from the Friends episode entitled “The One with Frank Jr.”)

So, obviously, this got me thinking about which five celebrities I would include on my “Freebie list.” (I decided on FIVE celebrities, like in the Friends version, as opposed to THREE, like in the Treme version, because . . . well . . . because I’m greedy, that’s why!)  Now, fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on whether you are a glass half-full or half-empty type person), I am currently single.  Thus, the creation of such a list for me is really a moot point.  After all, without a boyfriend to prevent me from doing so, I can sleep with ANY CELEBRITY I WANT!

Assuming they’d be willing to sleep with me . . .

Darn  . . . I forgot about that part . . .

However, I recognize that there may come a time, in the future, when I do have a significant other.  And said significant other may not, in fact, be willing to permit me to sleep with “any celebrity I want.” (MEANIE!)  Therefore, I realize that it might be wise for me to have my “freebie list” pre-prepared, and ready to be “whipped out,” at a moment’s notice.  And, I have to say, when it came down to creating my list, I had a lot more in common with Ross from Friends, than the characters from Treme.

Yeah, YOU!  Don’t look so excited . . .

Specifically, I had A LOT of trouble narrowing down my list to ONLY FIVE celebrities.  If you’ve visited this blog before, you know that (1) it is FILLED with pictures of shirtless celebrities; and, (2) I want to SLEEP WITH ALL OF THEM!

I decided I needed to have some guiding principle by which to narrow down my choices.  So, I excluded from my list any celebrity that was married, engaged, or in a serious long-standing relationship.  My rationale for doing this should be fairly obvious.  Basically, if I’m going to be limited to only FIVE “Get Out of Adultery Free” Cards, I’d really like to make them count.  And “making them count” requires that there be at least a small chance (no matter how infintesimal) that, were I actually to proposition my celebrities of choice, they would ACTUALLY SAY YES! 

 Granted, in this day in age, “marriage” and “monogamy,” in celebrity world, are not necessarily synonyous with one another.

 

And yet, those two terms are still synonyous in MY WORLD, even in the hypothetical context of this “list.”  Therefore, the following celebrities, each of whom would have LIKELY made this list, were excluded, do to their respective current relationship statuses:

Joshua Jackson

(Currently in a long-standing relationship with Diane Kruger)

John Krasinski

(Currently engaged to Emily Blunt)

Thanks to Best Week Ever for the above pic.  I am neither clever enough, nor sufficiently adept at Photoshop, to come up with something like this .  . .

Josh Holloway

(Currently married to Yessica Kumala)

And Matt Damon

(Currently married to Luciana Bozan Borroso)

I am happy to report that I have sufficiently narrowed down my choices, using the above-referenced principle.  Below are (in no particular order), the five male celebrities that comprise my Freebie List:

1) George Clooney

As far as I am concerned, any female who doesn’t put Clooney on their Freebie List is missing out on an EXCELLENT opportunity.  After all, I’m pretty sure this guy isn’t settling down any time soon.  (Would YOU?  If you were HIM?) Seriously, he is gorgeous, cut, majorly sexy, smart, and funny.  Plus, Mr. Clooney has been known to have a thing for younger ladies of the non-celebrity persuasion, JUST LIKE ME!  (OK . . . perhaps, a little bit hotter than me . . . but still . . .). 

2) Ian Somerhalder

Why Ian, you ask?  Just watch ONE episode of The Vampire Diaries, and you will know why this guy HAS to be on my list!  Better yet, check this out!

3) Ryan Kwanten

Why Ryan?  Did you LOOK at the above-picture?  If that hasn’t sold you, this fan-made video should do the trick (assuming you are a heterosexual female . . . and you have a pulse).

4) Bryan Greenberg

I don’t know what it is about this guy, but I REALLY LIKE HIM.  There’s just something very relatable about him.  Maybe it’s his self-depracating charm, or the fact that he can SING, as well as act.  Or, perhaps, it’s the fact that, even though he is “all famous and stuff” now, he’s still not above posting quirky, refreshingly awkward, videos of himself on YouTube.

(I seriously want to reach through the screen and pinch those cheeks!)

5) Vincent Kartheiser

You’re all going to think I am REALLY bizarre for this.  But I have a thing for Pete Campbell on Mad Men!   A BIG ONE!  Yes, I know!  He’s smarmy, and self-centered, weasely, and a wee-bit square.  But . . . he’s just so . . . PETE!  I don’t know.  Maybe I just have a weakness for the bad boys.  But Pete showed some real vulnerability in Season 3 of Mad Men!  Plus, he has a real soft spot for Peggy.  Check out this video if you don’t believe me . . .

So . . . there you have it:  My Freebie List.  Who’s on YOURS?

 

 

 

 

 

 

13 Comments

Filed under Freebie List

13 responses to “So, Who’s on YOUR Celebrity Freebie List?

  1. imaginarymen

    Diane Kruger be damned, I’d NEVER pass up a shot at Josh Jackson!!!

    You’re so good and respectful, I’m like “lemme at him!!” ;-0

    If course I’m single too – hmmmm … one may say our status is directly correlated to how much time we spend obsessing over Shirtless Celebrity Boys ;-ppp

    • LOL. I would love to say that the self-imposed “no relationships” policy on my Freebie List is related to some “high moral fiber” on my part. However, I think, if I’m truly honest with myself, more of it has to do with my candidates saying “Yes,” when I proposition them (even if it is just to use me for a one night stand,and then toss me out like last week’s issue of Entertainment Weekly). 🙂

      [Does that sound sad? I don’t think so! I would still have the AWESOME memories, and the joy of telling everyone, “I slept with George Clooney!” ]

      Attached celebrities of the non d-bag variety (a category in which I would like to think ALL of my above-referenced excluded celebs fall), are significantly less likely to engage in one night stands with random bloggers like myself.

      I’m just playing the odds . . . 😉

      For what it’s worth, I’m proud of our appreciation for shirtless men! Some people are connisseurs of art, others of wine . . . we are Connisseurs of Male Toplessness! I wouldn’t have it any other way . . .

  2. Amazon Annie

    Great blog. So much fun. I watched every video. I know what I’ll be thinking about tonight… who is on MY freebie list. I’ll get back to you one that one. My problem is that if I put any of your picks on my list they’d call me a cougar!!! However, you were absolutely right… Vincent Kartheiser won’t be on my list. I know he is must be a great actor because whenever he walks on the scene in Mad Men he makes my skin crawl…lol. He’s gotta be doing something right to make his character so unlikable to me. The rest of your picks are great and truly… and as they say in Italian “Saziche his own” (okay I know that’s not Italian!) Well thanks for the fun. I’m going to think up My Freebie List now. I have a feeling I won’t be sleeping too much!

    • No shame in being a cougar, Amazon Annie. In fact, your “cougar appeal” might be an important factor to consider in crafting your Freebie List. Examples of hot celebrity men who love cougars include:

      1) Ashton Kutcher
      2) Katie Couric’s boyfriend
      3) Hugh Jackman
      4) Ralph Fiennes
      5) Naveen Andrews

      Want more? Check out this website: http://www.angelfire.com/stars4/lists/couples-age-differences2.html

      Oh, and as far as Pete Campbell, I’m pretty sure he’s supposed to be make your skin crawl. Your response is the healthy one. Mine . . . not so much. It doesn’t change how I feel though.

  3. Lola

    lessee 🙂

    5. Aaron Paul: don’t think i’m crazy, but i love a guy with a little bit of a twang
    4. Idris Elba: but only if he had a mustache
    3. “The Hair” from that episode of 30 Rock: i don’t know who this guy is & i’m too lazy to try to look him up, but he needs to come back on for a cameo.
    2. Dev Patel: he’s adorable, i can’t even think of something snarky to say.
    1. Jon Hamm: i’ll always have a soft spot for Pete & Roger Silver Fox Sterling, but i have to go with JH.

    oh & i think this site has gotten be hooked on “True Blood” btw.

    • Aaron Paul . . . I like it . . . good choice. What’s cool about him is that he doesn’t fit into one type. He can be Grungy Bad Ass (like in Breaking Bad) or Geek Chic (like in Big Love). I almost didn’t realize it was the same actor. Did you know he’s dating that girl who plays Adrianna in 90210? No worries, though. You can totally take her ;).

      Idris Elba . . . also cool, and from the UK, so he’s got an accent that he hides for “American” roles . . . just like MY Freebie pic, Ryan Kwanten.

      I tried to research “The Hair”‘s true identity, but came up sadly empty handed. I’ll work on it though . . .

      Dev Patel . . . awww . . . Slumdog guy! I heart him. He always comes off so sweet and unassuming in interviews. May he never ever become “all Hollywood” . . .

      Although I’m definitely a “Pete gal,” no one can deny the hotness of The Hamm . . .

      You see Lola, my secret evil plan in drafting these blog entries has always been to drag you into the True Blood cult (through subliminal messages hidden in shirtless Ryan Kwanten and Alex Skarsgard pics ;)). This way, I have another fellow blogger with whom to fawn over the show after each episode . . . Glad to see it’s working ;).

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  5. hypa kitty

    Well Firstly, Good job on your blogs! Ive just found them 2 days ago and Im reading upto 10 blogs a DAY!

    Im a serious IAN fan, Vampire Diaries Fan, and a mega DAMON / ELENA fan!

    My five are therefore:

    1. Ian Somerhalder – Surprised? MMMM yes please anytime..
    2. Chad Michael Murray – How can you say no to him? Just watch a few off his [Disney] Films and fall in love ❤
    3. Josh Duhamel – Good Eye Candy mmm
    4. Jay Sean – He cuts my list mm
    5. and fifth place its Robert Patterson. x

    • Hey Hypa Kitty! Ooh, very nice Freebie list! Mommy like! Any list that has Ian Somerhalder on the top is A-OK by me.

      I must say, Chad Michael Murray used to make my freebie list too. But I’m still a bit mad at him for cheating on Sophia Bush with that then-underage extra from One Tree Hill! Grrrr. I must admit, he’s still a hottie though, as are all of your other picks. You’ve got got good taste, girl! 😉

      Thanks so much for stopping by and commenting on my blog, and for all your kind words. I’m so glad you are enjoying everything. Happy reading! 🙂

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  7. dbatt99

    I’ve been a fan of the Freebie Five list since those early Friends days. Mine has been listed and changed and re-listed. I’ve made every BF aware and now my husband and I have our agreements. Every once in a while, one of his will pop into town to film something or other, and I’ll get a touch paranoid, but once it’s laminated – there’s no going back!

    Lately I’ve been having issue with my list. Now that I’m happily married with child, I’m not sure I could go through with it. Actually, now that I’ve recently heard several “friend of a friend” stories of girls that have slept with some of the biggest celebrities and came home with quite the embarrassing tale, I’m not sure I want to sleep with any of these guys!

    I’d like to think that my proposed list would be more of a Freebie Five to spend the weekend getting pampered and wooed, and involve some heavy making out. God, does that make me a loser or what?!? Anyway, here goes:

    1. Adrian Grenier: Yes, from Entourage (on which he slept with a girl from her Freebie 5), but originally from Adventures of Seb. Cole. I grew up with him. First loves die hard.
    2. Leo DiCaprio: He strikes me as someone who’d be a bad lover. Even though I love him, I might just stick to being BBFs
    3. Justin Timberlake: Hot. Funny. Singer. I’d let him go all the way, and then have my heart broken into a million pieces
    4. Ryan Reynolds / Bradley Cooper: Both hot and funny. I guess first come first serve. My husband gets it!
    5. And Paul Walker: Only because I met him once and it’d be so simple to open with “We’ve met before, this must be fate”. Plus he was really big and tall and I like my men that way!

    Honorable Mention: Christian Bale. He’s been on the list since 1992, but I’ve recently bumped him because he’s a) beyond happily married and b) probably a little too intense for me

    Good blog!

    • Hi dbatt99! Thanks so much for stopping by and commenting! I had SO MUCH fun reading what you wrote here! You know, I think the most fun thing about writing this particular blog entry, (aside from researching and selecting my own Freebie Five, of course), was learning who everybody else would choose and why!

      WOW, you guys actually laminated your lists! That’s so funny! 🙂 I guess once you get married, that’s something you have to do. Otherwise, marital partners run the risk of the Rotating Freebie Five. Suddenly, any celebrity who you happen to spot in your travels, magically appears on the list, and, amazingly enough, “has always been there!”

      Then again, as someone who BLOGGED her list, some could argue that mine is as good as laminated. But, hey! I am NOT at all above telling my next significant other that, “I made that list BEFORE I met you. Things have changed . . . YOU have inspired me to rework my list!” 🙂

      Ahhh, I do remember the episode of Entourage where Vinnie Chase slept with the girl from his Freebie Five! I LOVED THAT! I seriously wonder how many single celebrities would actually go through with the whole Freebie Five Thing. I suspect more would than we might think, particularly the male celebs . . . Something to be hopeful about, I guess. 😉

      Speaking of which, I am going to be seeing Ian Somerhalder (who, as you can see, is on my list) at a convention I’m attending next weekend . Hmmmm . . .

      I love that you mentioned that you thought Leo DiCaprio would be a bad lover. I can see what you mean by that. Any guy who’s been that pretty all his life, probably has a large mirror in his bedroom, and spends a lot of time looking into it, even when he’s doing the deed . . . Not cool, Leo!

      It sounds cheesy, but when I read your comment about Justin Timberlake (good choice, by the way) breaking your heart, the song “Cry Me a River” started running through my head. Who knows? Maybe he would even sing it to you!
      Oohh, sneaky, you managed to make your Freebie Five into a Freebie Six, by putting two guys on one line. Very clever . . . I may have to steal that idea from you 😉

      Paul Walker has a great body. I bet he really knows how to use it too!

      And yeah, I agree that Christian Bale would be a bit intense. Plus, he has this habit of getting REALLY skinny in preparation for certain movies. And, if my Freebie ever was to weigh less than me, I think that would probably make me really uncomfortable . . .

  8. Bonnie

    I found your article looking for ideas on who to replace as my #1 slot in my freebie 5. As we all know, the loss of Paul Walker was a tragedy. As a result, I am now having to re-evaluate my list. Which was as follows:
    1. Paul Walker
    2. David Boreanez
    3. Joshua Jackson
    4. Eric Dane
    5. Brian Austin Green

    So how DO you replace someone as good as Paul? Really the complete package. Smart, funny , well – liked by all. Not to mention his generosity, love of nature, and who could forget those pretty blue eyes. It’s taken me this long and I STILL can’t get an idea of who it should be! Rgh

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