Where There’s a Will, There’s an “A” – A Recap of Pretty Little Liars’ “I Must Confess”

SPENCER:   “Nice to be stood up by your OWN therapist . .  .”

HANNA:  “She better not be charging us for this . . .”

EMILY:  “Do you smell something?  I think I smell a dead body.”

HANNA: “That might be me.  I just puked up coconut shrimp, right before I got here.”

EMILY:  “Nope, it’s definitely a corpse-like smell . . .”

ARIA:  “Aww, crap!  Not again!” 

Greetings, my Pretties!   Can you believe there is only one PLL episode left in the summer season?  It seems like only yesterday, that I was contemplating whether Creepy, Then-Only Possibly-Dead, Pedo Zombie Ian was somehow related to that Blueberry-looking chick from the Willy Wonka movies . . .

Good times!

Eleven episodes later, Ian is DEFINITELY dead.  And if the last few minutes of “I Must Confess” are any indication, “A’s” body count may very well be on the rise.  So, take a big hefty swig out of your vodka-spiked water bottle, make an appointment with your therapist, and set a dinner date with your long lost significant other, because it’s time for another PLL recap . . .

Why You Shouldn’t Call Emily the Weakest Link, Anymore . . .

Because I ran all the way to my therapist’s office, and only got slightly sweaty . . .

The episode begins with Emily receiving a pre-dawn text from “A,” and dashing out of her bedroom, in a panic.  Emily remains missing for hours, leaving her new girlfriend roommate, Hanna, and the rest of the PLL girls, to worry over her whereabouts.   We then see Emily running frantically through the woods, and winding up right outside Dr. Anne Sullivan’s office.  She NEEDS to talk . . .

“Geez, Emily.  You ran all the way here?  Would a SHOWER have killed you?  Some of us have to work in this office.”

However, by the time she arrives at the office, the rest of the girls are already there waiting for her.  Apparently, they need to talk too . . .

“Haha!  We beat you!” 

Way to be a loyal friend, Emily!  After some prodding, the girls evenually reveal to Shrinkypoo that “A” has been targetting Emily, specifically, for her weakness.  Apparently, she (or he?)  believes that, of the four girls, Emily is the “toughest nut to crack.” Also, it’s clearly her turn.

As it turns out, the text Emily received that morning relates to Aria.  It shows a picture of her cleaning Fitzy’s teeth with her tongue.  Underneath it is the phase, “Clue Ella [a.k.a. Mama Montgomery] in, and I will let YOU out.”

ARIA:  “Fitzy?  Is that Jackie I taste on your tongue?  Have you been cheating on me?”

FITZY:  “No, I just ate Jackie . . . because, I’m secretly a vampire . . . and because Jackie is LAME.”

ARIA:  “Oh . . . good call.”

Hey guys, remember when “A” pulled this same trick on HANNA a few episodes back, and it actually worked?

“Way to rub it in, Recapper!  That was actually a very dark time in my life.” 

Apparently, someone needs to update their “Unique Ways to Torture PLL Girls’ Handbook . . . and STAT!

One of the best lines of the episode, came when Spencer saw the picture, and wryly noted that, had Aria’s mom ACTUALLY seen it, she probably would have assumed it was “Spencer  . . . slutting it up” rather than her own daughter . . .”

“Hey, I am NOT a slut, Mama Montgomery!  How many sluts do you know that wear My Little Pony sweaters?” 

You can see a slight sense of relief pass over the girls, as they FINALLY tell someone outside their social circle about “A” (though they conveniently leave out most of the juicy stuff . . . you know, like the Jenna Thing . . . and Dead Ian).  No matter, Shrinkypoo seems sufficiently horrified by what she is hearing anyway, and wonders out loud why the girls have waited this long to come forward about what was happening to them . . .

“Ooh, this sh*t is JUICY!  I think I’ll go try and sell the idea to ABC Family, as a television series!  I’ll just have to insist that they get Angelina Jolie to play me.”

The next day at school, Shrinkypoo makes an appearance at school, during which she makes a speech to the student body about the dangers of Cyber Bullying . . .

 

“Yeah A!  That poster is totally on to you!”

While Shrinkypoo is giving her speech, we get a series of reaction shots from the rest of the cast.  The PLL girls look kind of horrified . . .

Blind Jenna looks evil.  (But, then again, she pretty much always looks like that . . .)

Annoying Mona looks like she’s practicing for a time twenty years in the future, when she has to get her first Botox injections, and finds herself no longer capable of forming realistic facial expressions .  . .

“I know you can’t tell from my face.  But I am VERY, VERY upset about this whole Bullying Thing.”

After the assembly, Hanna is FURIOUS with Shrinkypoo!  She feels like the therapist pretty much took her clothes off in public (Then again, this might just be a side effect of her late night phone sex sessions, with Caleb.)

“I just feel so violated!  Now, everybody knows what my Lily looks like!”

Conversely, Emily found Shrinkypoo’s speech empowering.  And she shows her newfound strength when Big Bad Blind Bully Jenna approaches the girls, and makes some snide remark about how Dead Ali was the biggest Cyber Bully of them all . . . “I guess it takes a bully to know one, Jenna.  Now, move your stick.  Other people are trying to pass you!” Emily sneers.

“Yeah, and while you are at it, why don’t you take your little stick and shove it up Police Boy Garrett’s ass!”

“You GO, EMILY!”

Why You Should Never Leave Hanna Alone with Your Wedding Dress . . .

Hanna is trying to play nice with Facelift Kate, after the whole “I Said Crappy Stuff About You on the Loudspeaker at Some Horse Farm, and You Threatened to Turn Me into Glue” thing.  So, she asks Spencer to get her some old smelly horse books to give to Facelift Kate, as a form of apology . . . you know, because Spencer – like most people who own My Little Pony Sweaters – is an expert on smelly horse books.

I don’t know, Hanna . . . if I was trying to make someone forget about an incident that occurred at a HORSE Farm, I would probably start by NOT GIVING THEM BOOKS ABOUT HORSES . . . just a suggestion.

Then, Hanna’s grandma makes a random appearance at school . . .

Apparently, she needs a copy of Hanna’s house keys, and wants Hanna to take her to the bathroom, so that she can “wipe the dew off her lily.”

And if that statement means what I think it means, that’s pretty much the most disgusting request I have ever heard someone make on prime time television, EVER!  (Just a note, boys and girls, if an adult ever asks you to go into the bathroom with them, and “wipe the dew off their lily,” that’s when you RUN AWAY . . .  FAST!  NO JOKE!  I assure you that Granny is fully capable of wiping the dew off her OWN LILY!  And if she isn’t, she should probably be in an assisted living facility, where trained nurses can do it for her.  Just sayin  . . .)

Back at home, Hanna is busy having Phone Sex with Caleb . . .

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 . . . when she gets a call on the other line from her dad.   AWKWARD!  Apparently, Daddy wants her to give a toast to the new happy couple, with Kate, at the engagement party.  (Gee Dad?  Aren’t toasts supposed to be like . . . I don’t know . . . spontaneous, or something?  It kind of defeats the purpose of a toast when you TELL someone they have to say good stuff about you.)  Hanna looks like she’d rather have all her fingernails plucked off than have to give a speech with Kate.  But she agrees to it anyway, because she is trying to be the “good daughter.”

Oddly enough though, Grandma Marin, of the Dewy Lily Club, is TOTALLY NOT COOL with her son’s upcoming nuptials.  In fact, she, more or less compares the upcoming event to cows getting slaughtered . . . (Boy, this woman sure loves her metaphors, doesn’t she?)

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“I’d rather become a Sloppy Joe, than help you get the dew off your lily . . .”

When Hanna’s mom comes home, Grandma Marin tells her that she looks like Condoleeza Rice . . . which, I guess, is supposed to be a compliment . . .

Yeah . . . I don’t really see the resemblance . . . Hillary Clinton, maybe, but not Condy . . .

Granny then tells her ex-daughter in law, that she should pretend that she’s starring in the last five minutes of Every Romantic Comedy Film Ever Written, and stop her son’s wedding.  Mama Marin is NOT amused . . .

“First of all, I look nothing like Condoleeza Rice.   Second of all, stop making my daughter touch your lily!”

At Papa Marin’s Super Snooty Engagement Party, Grandma Dewy Lily is being hilariously rude to her son’s guests, which makes me fall a bit in love with her, despite having kind of a bad first impression.

“Why should I bother learning any of your names?  My son’s to be divorced again in about two months . .  .”

Meanwhile, Hanna is trying to mend fences with the super slimy Facelift Kate, who’s acting nice on the surface, but is so obviously being fake, that I can’t, for the life of me, understand how Hanna isn’t picking up on it.

“Oh, Hanna!  It is so good to see you!  I would very much like to rip that blonde hair at of your head, lift my leg, and pee on your bloody skull.  I can’t wait to become your SISTER!

Facelift Kate takes this opportunity to show Hanna her mom’s wedding dress, which, of course, is NOT WHITE.  (That one clearly hasn’t been a virgin in a VERRRRRRRY long time!)

“Believe it or not, this is the same dress my Mom wore when she married my dad . . . It was white back then . . .”

Facelift Kate pulls out her purse, and extracts what she claims are two water bottles filled with vodka.  She offers some “liquid courage” to Hanna as the two plan out their toast.  Hanna seems hesitant at first, but sheer stupidity peer pressure wins out in the end, and she decides to chug-a-lug.

“I’ll get you my Pretty, and your little Lily too!” 

As a viewer, I figured out immediately, that Facelift Kate had manipulated the water bottles to sabotage Hanna.  (I actually thought she was goin to do something way worse, like lip her a Roofie, or something.)  But I could also see how Hanna — given her insecurities regarding her newfound popularity and her relationship with her dad — might put her misgivings aside, and go along with this Rich B*tch, in hopes of being accepted by her, and “fitting in” to this new family.  Seeing Hanna get gradually more intoxicated, as the evening wore on, was pretty darn funny . . . and yet, kind of sad too, since we all knew this wasn’t going to end well . . .

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When Facelift Kate conveniently steps outside for a bit, Hanna starts drunkenly dancing around with her stepmonster’s dress, gets dizzy, and TOTALLY YAKS all over the darn thing!

Before . . . 

After . . . 

The evil wench, of course, sees the whole thing go, down, smirks triumphantly, and heads off to give the toast by herself.

After the party, Papa Marin goes into the ladies’ room (What the heck is with this family following eachother into bathrooms?!)  He’s FURIOUS with his daughter for getting wasted, and bailing on the toast.  Hanna argues that Facelift Kate was drinking too, but Papa said SHE was poised and mature during the toast, unlike his Alchy of a DAUGHTER!

Grandma Awesome sticks up for Hanna, insisting that Papa should take it easy on her.  After all, it’s not like she PUKED ON THE BRIDE, which is what Grandma would have done!  When Facelift Kate returns, Grandma TOTALLY has her number, yanks her purse away from her, and extracts the two water bottles.

“Mmm!  Smells like breakfast!” 

Of course, the one Kate was drinking was plain water, whereas Hanna’s was PURE VODKA.

Granny gives a miserable, and sure to be VERY hungover tomorrow morning Hanna a hug, and takes her favorite granddaughter home to sleep it off . . .   Ooh!  I HATE FACELIFT KATE!  I can’t wait to see what Hanna has planned for her revenge!  It better be something GOOD!

Why You Should Never Discount Your Ex-Girlfriends . . . Even While they are in De-Gaying Camp . . .

“This is what I’m going to use to smack Granny for rearranging my cabinets, without permission.”

While Hanna is busy changing her stepmonster’s wedding dress from gawdy gold to puke brown (with coconut shrimp chunks), Emily is at home with Mama Marin having a heart-to-heart.  (Isn’t it weird / sort of sad that Emily’s relationship with Hanna’s mom seems way more affectionate and honest than her relationship with her own?)  Emily asks Mama Marin if she is upset about being home, while her former husband marries a Rich B*tch with an Evil Spawn of a Daughter . . .  Mama Marin admits that it’s hard, but that she’s doing her best to get by.  (I’m sure it helps to Mama Marin to know that Granny is going to make that Evil Wench’s life ABSOLUTELY MISERABLE!)

Then Mama’s maternal instincts kick in, and she asks Emily what’s going on between her and Samara.

“Well, actually, I think she left the show to play a supernatural creature on The Vampire Diaries, like all my ex-girlfriends eventually do.”

When Emily explains that there are still a lot of unanswered questions in her relationship with Samara, Mama Marin notes that, when you have unanswered questions in a relationship, it’s best to . . . you know . . . ASK THE OTHER PERSON ABOUT THEM.  (Duh!)  Shortly thereafter, we see Emily waiting at a restaurant for somebody.

And we THINK it’s going to be Samara . . .

“Nope!  Guess again!” 

So, you can imagine our surprise (Well, at least those of us who hadn’t read the spoilers were surprised!)  when the person who sits down at the other end of the table is . . . wait for it . . . MAYA!

Looking good, Maya!  De-gaying camp, has done wonders for your complexion! 

That’s right, boys and girls!  Fresh from De-Gaying Camp, Emily’s first girlfriend has clawed her way out of the PLL Vortex for Lost Significant Others, and right back into Emily’s heart.  I have to say, it was cute, how well these two seemed to relate to one another.  And, considering how EFFED up, sexually confused, and emotionally abused by her mom Emily was, when she FIRST started dating Maya, it was great to see our Emily looking all happy, horny and evolved, this time around.

If you know me, you know I wasn’t Maya’s biggest fan, the first time around.  However, she definitely won me over with her little jab at Emily’s ex-girlfriend “Little Orphan Bitchy.”

BOO!  Hiss! 

“She shoved your head underwater, and you STILL DATED HER!  Man, I didn’t come back a moment too soon!”  (Truer words were never spoken, Maya.)

Foreplay?

And then, Emily and Girlfriend #1 lived Happily Ever After . . . (at least until next week, when “A” will probably try to decapitate Emily and blame on Maya, or something else awful like that . . . No relationship is sacred on this show . . .)

Speaking of relationships, “A” has yet to ruin . . .

Why You Shouldn’t Keep Your Eyes Closed, While Making Out with Abs Toby . . .

There’s this totally random scene, at the beginning of the episode, in which a Grossed Out Abs Toby spies his adopted sis, Blind Jenna, lining up discarded fruit rinds on the dashboard of Policeboy Garrett’s car.

I love Toby’s disturbed facial expression, here . . . 

But Police Boy Garrett’s is EVEN FUNNIER! 

Oddly enough, Policeboy Garrett doesn’t seem to mind to mind that much, and starts sucking Blind Jenna’s face right in front of poor Abs Toby, who’s probably WISHING he was blind, right about now . . .

“AHHHH!  MY EYES!” 

Later, we have this sadly prophetic scene, in which Spencer makes out with Abs Toby in his pickup truck, on the way to school, and tells him that they have to be careful, or “A” will try and break them up.  Abs Toby promises her that this will never happen, which makes us feel pretty certain that it WILL . . .

Enjoy it while it lasts, Spoby!  Because something tells me you are in for a World of “A” Pain!

That night, we get a MUCH HOTTER Spoby Makeout session, which features Abs Toby’s half unbuttoned shirt.  (TAKE IT OFF, TOBY!  TAKE IT ALL OFF!)

Talk about a buzz kill.  Things are just about to move to a TV-MA rating, when Abs Toby notices two figures involved in an intense discussion upstairs in Facelift Vampire Jason’s bedroom.  He tells Spencer what he saw.  And Spencer wonders why Abs Toby had his eyes open, while they were making out.

This, of course, made me think of that Bruno Mars’ song, “Grenade.”  (“I should have known you were trouble from your first kiss.  You had your eyes wide open.  Why were they open?“)  So, then I started singing to myself.  Annnnnd .  . . I pretty much missed the rest of the scene.  OOPS!  (Damn you, Bruno Mars!)  I’ll try my best to tell you what happened, anyway.

Now that Spencer knows that Abs Toby is watching her kiss him, she’s probably feeling pretty uncomfortable.  I mean, what does she look like, when she’s kissing?   Does she make a weird face?  Is her mouth doing something weird?  It’s got to be pretty disconcerting to know something like this.

So, of course, NOW SHE’S KISSING WITH HER EYES WIDE OPEN (Why were they open?  I gave you all I had, and you tossed it in the trash, you tossed it in the trash, yes you diiiiiiiddd . . .  SEE, what you did to me, Abs Toby?)

While open-eyed macking, Spencer sees the same thing that Abs Toby saw.  And now she’s thoroughly freaked out.  So, she rushes from the car, as a half-naked Abs Toby chases after her.  (CAN I GET A HELL YEAH?)

NO TOBY!  Take the shirt OFF!  Trust me, you will run MUCH faster . . . 😉 

But it gets worse.  The person Facelift Vampire Jason was talking to ends up being . . . wait for it . . . HER DAD!

Cue SPENCER FACE!

A fairly intense scene follows, in which Spencer tries to get her dad to explain what the f*&k he’s doing hanging out with Facelift Vampire Jason, and her dad totally blows her off!  Then, Abs Toby gets in the mix, risking his job, and his relationship with his potential future father-in-law, by demanding that Daddy Dearest answer Spencer’s questions.

Daddy is FURIOUS, that his daughter’s boyfriend would have the AUDACITY to confront him in this way.  (Personally, I thought it was kind of hot!)  He wants Spencer to come home with him IMMEDIATELY, but she refuses.  And her and Abs Toby speed away in their car, as Daddy Dearest chases after it . . . like a dumb dog, who’s just gotten off his leash . . .

“Oh, go pee on a hydrant, Dad!  I have more open-eyed face-sucking to do!” 

When Spencer arrives home that night, Daddy Dearest reluctantly admits that Ali and Facelift Jason’s grandmother had changed her will right before she died, and TOTALLY cut Facelift Jason out, leaving everything to Ali.  Then, after BOTH Ali and granny died, the Dilaurentis’ hired Daddy Dearest to alter the date on the will, and it’s contents, so that it didn’t appear to give Jason a motive for killing Ali.  (Annnnd, now we know where Jason got all his money from!)

Mind control, of course! 

In a flashback, we see Alison suggest that Jason may have sold a family heirloom to buy drugs, and that she may have gone to visit her grandmother before she died to tell her this, so that she would change her will.

“I’m going to take ALL YOUR MONEY!  Suck on THAT, Facelift Vampire Jason!” 

Spencer then, puts two and two together, recalling that Alison (and possibly Ian?) went away to Georgia, shortly before her death, to visit her grandmother.  And this was, possibly, when she got the will changed.   Given all this, now Spencer REALLY thinks Facelift Vampire Jason killed Ali  . . . both, for the money, and to get back at her for trying to have him cut out of the will.

Daddy Dearest warns Spencer not to pursue such theories, which brings Spencer to a more dangerous question.  “What does the Dilaurentis Family have on US, that you were willing to break the law to help them?”

“I’ve been a bad, bad boy . . .” 

“You are SOOOO busted!” 

Daddy Dearest didn’t exactly have an answer for that one, but I’m going to guess it has something to do with the fact that he’s porking (or at least used to pork Ali and Jason’s mom) . . .  We’ll see if I’m right . . .

Why You Should Never Touch Psycho Mike’s Computer . . .

“Stop trying to steal my internet porn, MOM!” 

Ma and Pa Montgomery are fighting about Psycho Mike.  Pa Montgomery wants him on anti-depressants, since he thinks his emotional condition is the same genetic one that afflicted his brother.  Ma Montgomery doesn’t think drugs are necessarily the answer.  She wants Psycho Mike to try talking to a therapist first, to see what specifically is causing Mike to behave this way.

Honestly, I can usually care less about Aria’s parents, but their discussion was an interesting one, this week.  After all, both Ma and Pa have a point.  On one hand, there shouldn’t be any stigma against taking medication for clinical depression.  And, in this case, Mike has both a family history of the disease, and is showing all the classic signs.  On the other hand, knowing this show, Mike’s sudden depression is almost certainly situational, and almost definitely has something to do with “A.”  So, talking, more than drugs, is probably the answer here . . .

“Hey Psycho Mike?  Why don’t you take a break from Cyber Sex, and come down for dinner, K?” 

Anywhoo . . . Aria enters Mike’s room to find him once again tapping away at his computer (which seems somehow linked to whatever it is that causing him to act out).  She tells Mike to come down for dinner, and when he refuses, Mama Montgomery comes in, and tries to take his computer away.  BAD MOVE!  Psycho Mike FREAKS OUT, and wrenches it from her fingers, causing her to fall back into one of his chests of drawers, and seriously hurt her wrist.

It’s a heartbreaking scene, as a horrified Psycho Mike, upon realizing that he just basically beat up his own mother, dashes into the bathroom, while Ma Montgomery chokes back tears.

I have to say, Holly Marie Combs was remarkable in this scene.  As a typically strong mother type, it was fascinating to see Ma Montgomery looking unusually timid and fragile, this week. I honestly had tears in my eyes, when she frantically made Aria promise not to tell her father what Mike did.  Ma Montgomery seems afraid of what her husband would do to Psycho Mike, if he found out.   She also seems just the slightest bit afraid of her own son . . .

This storyline made me teary AGAIN, when Aria came back into Psycho Mike’s room, and sat on the edge of his bed, next to him.  “Is mom going to be all right?”  He asked his sister nervously, acting the part of the innocent younger brother, once again.

“Yes,” replied Aria.

“Am I going to be?”  He asked worriedly.

“Yes,” exclaimed Aria, pulling her little brother in for a tight hug.

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(All together now: AWWWWWWW!)

Toward the end of the episode, Aria, tired of all the secrets her family has been keeping from one another, finally confronts her parents about Psycho Mike’s stealing.

And when Mike, himself, comes down to the living room to be with his family, we all feel a bit of hope, that things might finally start to become a bit less angsty in the Montgomery home.

 *sniffle, sniffle*  “I just keep having all of these FEELINGS!”

(Or, at least, we can FINALLY figure out what the f*&k has been going on with Psycho Mike!)

Why You Should Always Check Your Bobble Head Dolls for Bugs . . .

Dr. Freud is ALWAYS listening . . . 

The night after her morning meeting with the PLL girls, and her triumphany BULLIES ARE BAD speech, Shrinkypoo is walking the streets of Rosewood by herself late at night (never a good idea, by the way), when she gets a strange cell phone call.  The call is basically a taperecording on repeated playback of Shrinkypoo talking to the girls, during their private therapy session.

“Hi, Shrinkypoo!  I’m calling to confirm the appointment I have with you later tonight.  My name is ‘DEATH’.” 

Having already had her office broken into once before, an understandably terrified Shrinkypoo calls the Lame-o Rosewood cops to search for bugs in her office.  These police academy rejects find no such bugs, but that’s clearly because they aren’t really looking all that hard.  Not surprisingly, Policeboy Garrett is there.

“Gee Shrinkypoo, I’m really sorry that you have a potentially murderous stalker watching your every move.  But I need to get back to making out with my underage girlfriend . . .  Catch ya later . . . unless, you are already dead by then.”

Oddly enough, all Policeboy seems interested in are the names of the patients that were in Shrinkypoo’s session during the supposed bugging, so that he can find them, chop them into tiny pieces, and feed them to Blind Jenna.  Shrinkypoo is fortunately smart enough not to give the Shady Police Boy this confidential information.  And he leaves in a huff . . .

Later, while thumbing through her files, Shrinkypoo comes upon one file in particular belonging to a patient, the same age as the PLL girls.  Upon studying the file, Shrinkypoo notes some shocking similarities between the patient and this “A” the girls are describing.

So, she calls Emily and tells her to gather the girls and meet her at the office ASAP.   “I know who A is,” Shrinkypoo says, though OF COURSE, she conveniently doesn’t give this information out over the phone.  Because that would be too easy, right?

By the way, remember that time when HANNA texted the PLL girls to tell them that SHE knew who “A” was?  Remember what happened to her, back then?

Ahhhh, memories . . . 

So, the girls’, of course, rush to Shrinkypoo’s office, eager to learn the true identity of “A.”  But when they get there . . . SURPRISE!  She’s not there!  In fact, she might be DEAD!

At least that’s what THIS text message, which the girls get, shortly after arriving in the office, seems to suggest . . .

OH NO!  How are the girls ever going to learn “A’s” identity now!  THE HORROR!

In the final scene, we see gloved hand trashing the incriminating therapy file, and removing a not-particularly-well hidden bug from the bottom of a Sigmund Freud bobble head  (See, Police Boy Garrett!  Dead Shrinkypoo was RIGHT!  It wasn’t IN THE WALL!) . . .

Damn you, “A”!   Damn YOU!

If you thought this week’s PLL was intense, wait until you check out next week’s trailer!  Be prepared for ugly dolls, more cryptic “A” messages, and a weird Ali dream sequence, among other things . . .

You know what else is going to be INTENSE about next week’s summer finale?  My blogger pal, France and I will be LIVEBLOGGING IT!

Yes, Hanna, we love it too!  Be sure to check back later this week, when I will have exclusive details on how YOU can take part of this spectacular event!

See you then, my Pretties!

[www.juliekushner.com][Fangirls Forever]

7 Comments

Filed under Pretty Little Liars

7 responses to “Where There’s a Will, There’s an “A” – A Recap of Pretty Little Liars’ “I Must Confess”

  1. sassyfran

    Oh my gosh I was laughing so hard at the funny parts, crying a little too and it was all such fun. I am sooooo glad you talked me into recapping; that was you right? Any who, You did so awesome as usual. I loved your references in the Spoby parts and about grandma and Kate especially. It was an awwwwwwww moment when the Montgomery’s seemed to make some head way; hopefully that will be one new beginning. I cannot wait to see what happens with Ezra and Aria; I wonder if that will wait until season three. I guess it could be a slight part of next week jammed packed episode. Oh and so far I have remained unspoiled which is so hard for me; I am just so afraid it will confuse me on the recaps. I mean I watch the promos but not other spoilers. Oh and Yes the Live Blog will be a blast I can’t wait till next week but I am sad to see it go for the year; very sad. It will give me time to by that season one I so need to have it seems. Oh and I totally couldn’t tell what as under the bobble head that I called a statue, I was so down for the count by then LOL.Ashley and Emily were a sad pair weren’t they; but I was so happy to see Maya again you just don’t know. I just hope she is around for a bit. Hey did your read that Samara was going to be on Vampire Diaries or was that a joke or it just four in the morning LOL. I don’t know why it takes me so long to do the recaps but the time just flies by; its a good thing I enjoy the show or it would be hard to work that long on it. OH and before I forget Peter Hastings WOW what a turd LOL he really is stuck in the middle of this now. I guess I am not real surprised but I feel sorry for Spencer and what will her mother say next week? I have a feeling it won’t go well for Spencer with Mom around.

    Thank so much for sharing. 🙂

    • Thanks so much for the awesome comment, France! Our post-show discussions never fail to make me smile. I HAD heard that Samara is going to be on The Vampire Diaries! From what I’ve read on the spoiler sites, she will be playing an ex-girlfriend / naughty vamp of Ripper Stefan’s. Fitting right? It is funny that this will be the SECOND of Emily’s girlfriends’ to make an appearance on the show. I actually think it would be great, if Emily herself made a guest appearance on TVD. Maybe she could be a werewolf, or something? 😉

      As far as the hiatus, we might not have to wait as long as we think. If PLL follows the same format from this year, the show should be back for another twelve episodes as early as this winter. That’s not too bad, right? 😉 And besides, by then, we will have plenty of prime time television to keep us busy, while we wait.

      By the way, I caught your fall recap schedule on your blog. Very ambitious! What a great selection of shows you have decided to cover! I can’t wait to hear your takes on all of them. I have a feeling I will be lurking around your blog a lot, this fall.

      Haha, you are absolutely right about Spencer’s dad! TURD is the perfect name to describe him. He’s the worst parent on the entire show . . . worse even than Caleb’s foster mom! I mean, at least SHE knew she was awful!

      Spencer’s dad is just so self-righteous, and callous. It’s amazing Spencer came out as normal as she did, considering who her dad and brother are. I do hope her mom decides to take her side for a change, regarding her disagreement with her dad. She hasn’t had such a great track record doing it in the past, truthfully. But there’s a first time for everything right? 🙂

      I am a little worried for Spoby and Ezria, in the future, since they definitely seem to be the next likely targets for “A’s” wrath. Hopefully, our girls are strong enough not to let a few rumors and innuendos screw up their respective relationships. Here’s hoping.

      Oh, I just can’t wait to liveblog with you next week. I think we are going to have a blast. I’m going to try to get in touch with you later this weekend, to see about doing a little pre-planning / gif and picture collecting. Thanks again, for sharing your recaps with me, and for being such a loyal reader and commenter. You rock! Have a great weekend! 😉

  2. MCRmyMember

    Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!! One more episode in the first part of the second season!!!!! Man, time flies by quickly!!!!!!!!!!!
    This was soooooo hysterical. And I can’t wait for the live blog, even if I don’t know exactly what it is.
    And I am soooo glad that I was not the only one to think that Toby should have taken the shirt off instead of put it back on. And Hanna’s wetsuit comment to Caleb……HAAAAAA! 😉
    I hate Kate. I hated her in the books, and I hate her on the show. She is evil! Not only is she making Hanna’s life difficult, but she is ruining her mother’s wedding. That is seriously selfish. I did like her grandma, though. I just hope that they don’t end up recycling the whole “Oh no, my parents are breaking up/broken up and are sneaking around! Will they get back together, or will I have to watch this storyline replay itself for a third time.” I will honestly start falling asleep during this show.
    I’m glad that Maya came back. And that comment about Blunt Paige the Insane Ass Swimmer totally made me like her again. Maybe, just maybe, their relationship will actually work out this time (but we all know that’s not going to happen, because before long, she will be sucked into the vortex again………)
    I’m scared for Falcon Boy and Detective Spencer. And here is why:
    http://www.wetpaint.com/pretty-little-liars/articles/pretty-little-liars-cast-reveals-6-juicy-finale-spoilers
    I might actually shed a few tears if they break up, just because I thought they could go for the long run, like Aria and Ezra. And this promo REALLY does not help: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-BMwRQVaU1Q&feature=mfu_in_order&list=UL
    Also, I pose what I think is the most scarest question of all……WHAT THE HELL IS A DOING TO THE GIRLS WITH A BUNCH OF DOLLS?????
    And, now that i think about it, they kind of remind me of the dolls we saw in Jenna’s room, when Spencer went to visit Toby, and he was told he was free. But why is the Emily doll (and refering back to the article I posted before, what does the Alison doll have to do with this mystery? And why did she have it?) not with the other dolls? Emily really is getting beat up this season. Is it bad that I REALLY want Aria to get her butt handed to her next season? 🙂
    Speaking of Aria, I hope that Mike turns into the awesome little brother he was in the books. I just hope that they don’t have him end up with *spoiler alert* Hanna. *shivers* *gags* *burns book* *joins covent and shaves head so she will never have to think about Hanna and Mike getting it on* Needless to say, I’m glad they aren’t following the books exactly. 🙂
    Oh, and I think that if they are going with the whole “one person is to die each season” thing, I think that it will be Jenna. Why? (other than the fact that *spoiler alert* she dies in the books) Because of this article:http://www.wetpaint.com/pretty-little-liars/articles/is-this-the-end-of-jenna-tammin-sursok-cast-in-new-movie
    The sad thing is, I liked Jenna in the books. She was slightly creepy, but you never could suspect her of anything. And the back story she had with Ali was really cool. On the other hand, I hatred Falcon Boy. It’s really weird.
    And, I agree that I think that Spencer’s dad was whoring around with Ali and Jason’s mom. *Spoiler Alert* This atually happens in the books, and he ends up being the father of Ali. So spencer and Ali are half-sisters. 🙂
    And please don’t tell me I’m the only one who thinks it would be awesome if Lucas was A. That would be a total mind twister, and it would be so amazing! And unexpected! I mean, he has a motive (Hermie the Hermaphrodite), and he did look slightly guilty at the talk the therapist was giving. 🙂
    Spencer Face: :00000000
    Hanna Drunk Face: :)))))))))))))))
    Hanna After throwing up on Isabel’s wedding dress: 😛
    Toby, when he sees Garrett and Jenna sucking face: :8 😛 :$
    And there are this weeks faces. 🙂

    • Hey MCRMyMember! I get so excited to find your comments in my inbox. I always know they are going to be filled with generalized awesomeness, hilarity, juicy spoilers galore, and, of course, those adorable little faces . . . with Hanna Drunk Face being my favorite. (To put it in Hanna’s words: “I love, lovvvvveeee, love it!”)

      So, here’s the scoop on the liveblog. In a day or two, I’ll send you a link to a little chat space, where my friend France and I will be commenting on the show AS IT AIRS. You can chat right along with us. And we will be able to respond to you in real time. The software that enables us to do this, also allows us to put in pictures, gifs, twitter feeds, and interactive polls. Just in case you are curious, here is an example of one we did for the Season 2 Finale of The Vampire Diaries, this past year:

      http://www.coveritlive.com/index2.php/option=com_altcaster/task=viewaltcast/altcast_code=9911b77866/height=550//width=470

      As you can see, the cool thing about the liveblog, is that even if you miss it, you can always go back and relive the fun, after the fact. More details later. For now, let’s get back to last week’s episode . . .

      I’m with you regarding Facelift Kate! She’s the worst! Any chance she will end up eaten by Blind Jenna, and left to rot on the dashboard of Police Boy Garrett’s car, in the Season 2 finale? A girl can dream, can’t she? 😉

      It’s funny. I remember the first time Kate appeared, back in Season 1. The actress was this kind of sweet, sort of nerdy, looking girl. When I recapped the episode in which she appeared, I made some comments about her dorkiness, but sort of left it at that. Then I got all these comments on my post filled with Kate-Hate (stemming from the book), and was, honestly, kind of surprised.

      NOW . . . it’s all starting to make sense. . Facelift Kate SUCKS . . . big time! And, for once, I’m actually happy they recast the role. After all, I think this biatch (though she might be very nice in person) is way more suited to playing a villain to her predecessor . . . (no offense to the original Kate, of course).

      Ooh, those dolls from the promo were SUPER creepy . . .Why the hell would Ali willingly keep those things in her home? I thought she was supposed to have good taste, or something. I know they are supposed to represent each of the PLL girls and stuff, but still . . . YUCK. There’s just something about their little puckery faces, and beady little eyes, that just make me want throw them against the wall, and run and hide under my bed. (No offense, to dolls and doll lovers, of course ;))

      Also, what the heck was Emily wearing in that Dream Sequence? It looked like something out of Alice and Wonderland. Very UN-Emily. Speaking of Emily, I kind of hope Maya sticks around too. Her and Emily just seem to “get one another.’ When they first shipped Maya off to de-gaying camp, I kind of expected her to come back all creepy, brainwashed and zombie-like. So, it was nice to see that she stayed normal. And hey, she even had better HAIR than when she left. So . . . progress! 😉

      It’s interesting that in the books you liked Blind Jenna and hated Abs Toby, and in the show it is vice versa. I think a lot of that has to do with “who’s raping who,” if you catch my drift. Based on what I’ve heard about the books, Toby raped Blind Jenna, whereas, in the series, it was definitely the other way around. I feel like, as a character, you just can never redeem yourself from being an incest molester. That . . . and Blind Jenna is just bizarre, with her flute playing, and her Police Boy humping, and her odd gross little fruit eating habits. She just makes me itch, and not in a good way.

      I agree with you that Lucas ending up being “A” would be a pretty big shock, especially since so many of us (myself included) are such big fans of the character. Perhaps, the only more shocking choice for “A” would be Fitzy. Can you imagine the response among the Ezria fan contingent? There would be riots in the streets, for sure!

      On the other hand, I do remember Marlene King once noting that “A” appeared in episode 1, which, I think, would cancel out Lucas. Didn’t he not appear until the third or fourth episode? Then again, I’ve been wrong before . . .

      Thanks again for your awesome commentary, MCRMyMember. And I definitely look forward to gossiping with you about the Season Finale. Talk to you soon! 🙂

      • MCRmyMember

        I was looking forward to gossiping with you, before I found that I have to miss it air. So no live chat for me! 😦 But I found a solution to this problem, as my sister was begging me to join the live chat. She also avidly reads your recaps (she doesn’t comment. No idea why), and we have practically the same thoughts. So, I will have some input, as we practically have telekiness, or what ever sharing thoughts is called. 🙂 I have trained her well in the art of funny faces, spoilers, and things of such matter. 🙂 I am sorry, but I hope you can forgive me. And I am sorry in advance for anything my sister says that is offensive to Ezria or anything else, because she kind of types without thinking. Which I think makes it funny, but it can be really……..offensive. 🙂 Espicially Ezria, because she ISN’T in love with them. I’ts kind of funny. I hope you like her. 😉
        And in response to your response (?), Lucas came in the sixth episode. My brain is obviously filled with useless trivia and facts about Glee and PLL. 🙂 But that means that it points the biggest finger at Mona, Ezra, Maya, Darren Wilden, Jenna, Wren, Melissa, Mike, and their parents (with the exception of Papa Marin, Papa Fields, and both Papa and Mama Hastings), if they are going with someone who appeared in the first episode. I’m probably missing someone, but thats all I can come up with at the moment.
        Ezra as A!!!!!!! Ha!!!!!!!!!!!!! That’s going to keep me laughing throughout the week! And I also love Lucas and his geeky charm…..although I have no idea who Seth Cohen is. 🙂

  3. :)

    Heyyy I am Back! Even though Maya came back on the show…finally. I still have an un-opened bottle of grape hater-ade, and i am ready to just murder them all! Let the animosity begin!

    Spencer’s Dad
    Normally when you go to a neighbors house for a chat (or disagreement) or anyone for that matter usually you stay in the living room on the FIRST FLOOR. Now i am speaking of the circumstances of Spencer’s Dad and Jason, because supposedly they dislike each other, so why would Mr. Hastings be spotted UPSTAIRS with Jason. I remember seeing two figures UPSTAIRS and thinking there must be some girl up there…..for a second i actually thought it was Maya thinking that is still her house. But Anyways, i was like Jenna, Jason, and Garret….so when it was Mr. Hastings i was in complete shock literally. I know this isn’t a big deal but when i drink my hater-ade everything is on blast….even your location in a neighbors house!

    Mike Mike
    So my hope for Mike to possibly try to commit suicide might not happen anymore…(darn i mean there was like one more episode). Funny, i had it all planned out in my mind. Mike would kill himself somehow and there would be a letter that HE WROTE, and then his laptop would show the messages he was receiving from -A. And then the girls would be all upset especially Aria and then she would be the prime suspect of Murder because it was her brother and -A designed the letter to make it look like Aria killed him……thus finally Aria would be the next target of -A’s torture.
    Either way it is good to see Mike come around….i guess.

    Hanna Banana Makes a Smoothie!
    (teehee i actually laughed when i wrote that…get it smoothie = puke except less appetizing ;)..) I read the books so when watching the episode and noticing her characteristics (Kate’s) I was frowning from the get-go. The worst part is that i would understand that Hanna would give the books to Kate as an apology ONLY IF Kate never called back threatening her. I mean two wrongs should not make a right….Hanna cusses out Kate = wrong (even though highly necessary). Kate calls back with a fierce threat = wrong. So obviously Hanna SHOULD HAVE NOT MADE IT RIGHT! Lol i know the quote doesn’t mean this, but for my case it really should have. Hanna should have been that fierce girl that she usually acts around school, than that insecure chubby girl she was around Ali, because her allowing Kate to push her around is equivalent to her friendship with Ali! Plus it is obvious that Kate is gonna go after Caleb

    The Shoulder Style Has got To End!!!
    Last week Spencer had the jean shoulder less now you got Emily following the same design only with a black cotton long sleeve T 😀 I don’t need to explain myself but no more 😛

    Maya Returns….without the Drama!
    Do not get me wrong but i am a little surprise there was not some HUGE GIRL DRAMA! Which now that i think about is kinda of cool that Maya was so understanding. But tell me why Maya has been back for awhile but has not called Em?!?!?! A little disappointed. The great thing is that the whole house thing was finally resolved Hallelujah!

    Great Recap as ALWAYSSSS KJ 🙂 seriously your recaps are apart of my weekly agenda lol 😀 Fantastic. I can’t wait for your reply whooo!

    🙂

    • Hey there :)! Yay, I’ve been waiting all week for my weekly dose of haterade! And I was thrilled to find it in my inbox, just in time for the hurricane. (Trust me, I can use some serious haterade now. And the fact that its grape helps a lot. I love me some grape, which explains why this website is so very purple.)

      You know, I never really thought about the whole, “Spencer’s dad in Facelift Jason’s bedroom” thing. But, now that you mention it, it was REALLY weird. (Not to mention, a wee bit creepy.) I mean, I thought Spencer’s dad was getting a little side action with Mommy Dilaurentis, but NOT with Facelift Jason! *pukes*

      OK . . . OK . . . I’m sure there was none of THAT going on in the bedroom. But really . . . why COULDN’T they just talk in the living room . . . or the kitchen . . . or in the basement, for that matter? Anywhere aside from in Jason’s room, RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE WINDOW, so that anybody who was walking by would easily be able to see them. Sneaky Secret Villain FAIL! 🙂

      Awww, I’m sorry you didn’t get that Psycho Mike Suicide Scene you were always hoping for. But hey, there’s always Season 3! Seriously though, I’m VERY intrigued to find out what the heck this guy’s deal is, and who he’s always chatting with on his computer. Is it simply that he’s having cyber sex with someone who says they are a 15-year old petite blonde girl named Candice, but is actually a 55-year old fat bald man named Bubba? Or is it something more sinister than that? (Though really . . . that would be pretty darn sinister.) Could Psycho Mike be the victim of blackmail, or is he just the lowest ranking member of the mysterious NAT club? Only time will tell . . .

      Hanna Banana Makes a Smoothie . . . Man, I should have thought of that one! That is both the most hilarious, and most disgusting, show caption I have seen for this show, possibly EVER. And I’m inclined to agree with you. Because Hanna is one of my favorite PLL girls, it was really hard for me to see her bend over backwards for this b*tch Kate, and then, so easily fall for her, honestly, fairly obvious tricks.

      The fact that Hanna vowed for vengeance at the end of the episode made me feel a little bit better, however. Personally, I hope Hanna and Granny Marin put neon green hair dye in Facelift Kate’s shampoo, and force feed her pounds and pounds of fried chicken and chocolate, so she gets all fat and pimply. But that’s just me.

      As you mentioned I can definitely see Facelift Kate trying to sabotage Hanna’s and Caleb’s relationship, by stealing him away from her, or worse. And yet, knowing Caleb, I’d be really shocked if he fell for a prissy wench like Kate . . . Even Hanna is a bit high maintenance for Caleb. And this chick makes Hanna look like Tomboy Barbie!

      Oh, and I’m totally with you about the whole off-the-shoulder shirt look being overdue for a trip to the trash bin. (1985 called, and it wants that back! :)) Though admittedly, Emily wore it a bit better than Spencer did. Spencer’s outfit last week, was just the worst.

      And finally, I was thrilled for you that Maya made her triumphant return! I know you are a huge Emmaya fan! And though her return didn’t bring the usual drama that come with most of Emily’s girlfriends, I’m actually kind of relieved at how NORMAL Maya acted. I mean, seriously, after the massage from hell, and that creepy thing with the shoulder cream, girlfriend needs a break, BIG TIME!

      Oh, and yeah, I guess Maya is now living “45-minutes away.” So, we are supposed to believe that her parents just SOLD the house they just bought back to Facelift Jason, in a matter of weeks? Weird . . .

      Thanks again for your hysterical commentary, and for talking PLL with me. I’m definitely going to miss our chats, during the hiatus. Please tell me you are planning to watch TVD, Glee or Gossip Girl this fall. You are . . . right? RIGHT? 🙂

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