High, Horny, Hot, Headless, and Hungry (HOORAY!) – A Recap of The Vampire Diaries’ Season 3 Premiere “The Birthday”

I’ll be the first to admit that sometimes I get a bit over-excited when images of Naked Damon appear on my television screen.  For example, this evening, I was just minding my own business, watching the TVD Season Premiere, when the above picture popped up before me.  Then THIS happened . . .

Dammit!  It is REALLY inconvenient to have your head fall off, when you are trying to watch a show!   You know, if Stefan hadn’t come by to “put me back together,” I would never have been able to write this recap!

Well, hello Fangbangers!  It has been WAY too long, since I’ve had the opportunity to spend an evening with you!  I mean, I can’t believe how long it has been, since I used this picture in a recap . . .

Actually, I’m pretty sure, I just used this a couple of days ago  . . .

Fortunately, tonight’s TVD Season Premiere MORE than made up for the criminally lengthy summer hiatus, by giving us fangbanging fangirls (and fanboys) everything we could POSSIBLY want in a new TVD episode.

I mean, think about it,  there was a kickass keg party, Delena, obligatory nudity, Delena, SUPER HOT Forwood sex, Delena, homoeroticism galore, Delena, bloody bites and kills, Klaus antics, Ripper Stefan, Delena, people getting REALLY REALLY high and wasted on prime time TV, Delena, Team Bad Ass, Delena cool special guest stars, Delena, a massive cliffhanger, and did I mention Delena?

So lather up, My Lovelies, and break out your dancing shoes . . . because SOMEONE in Mystic Falls is about to turn LEGAL!

And it’s NOT Katherine . . . because she turned legal about 485 years ago . . . 

(By the way, special thanks to my good pal Andre, who has created all the fabulous screencaps you see here.  It’s a tough job poring over all those sexy scantily-clad bodies, for hours on end . . . But SOMEBODY has to do it . . .)

Always End Your Life Evening, With a “Little Southern Hospitality” . . .

“Why are you doing this to me?  Haven’t you read my blog?  I’m TEAM KLAUS!” 

Word to the wise, ladies . . . if a stranger shows up in your backyard, and feels the need to tell you that he’s “not a serial killer,” there’s a really good chance he wears women’s lingerie for fun, and has enough dead bodies in his closet to put on a stage production of “A Chorus Line.”

“Hey, I resemble that remark.” 

What better way to kickstart a season than with a gruesome double homicide?  I mean, come on . . . even if we HADN’T seen this Random Anonymous Girl’s head tumble off her bloody body in the trailers, we’d know she was a goner, the minute she stepped outside to retrieve her absentee dog, for one simple reason: WE’VE NEVER SEEN HER BEFORE!

Though, I must say, to Random Anonymous Girl’s credit (hereinafter “RAG #1”), she was a heck of a lot smarter than the First Kills in most horror films.  Consider this . . . Despite the fact that Klaus was ridiculously charming, with his faux Southern accent, and his lame, but oddly adorable, story about how his car broke down up the road, RAG#1 was not about to voluntarily let this stranger into her house.  NO SIR!

“Aren’t you even the least bit curious what a True Hybrid’s Weiner looks like?” 

Though RAG #1 is polite enough to let Klausipoo use her cell phone to call for a tow truck, since his phone is conveniently “out of juice,” she insists on bringing it outside to him, rather than letting him “come and get it,” himself.  Klaus complains that this is not what he considers “Southern Hospitality.” (The house in question is located in Tennessee.)  But RAG #1 isn’t Southern.  She’s from FLORIDA . . . land of Oranges . . . Mickey Mouse . .  . and people who don’t invite psychos into their homes, for no good reason.

“Suck it, Were Vamp!”

But, you see, here’s the problem with the whole “Vampires can’t enter homes unless invited” rule . . . Unless you are wearing your Trusty Vervain Necklace, a good vampire can MAKE YOU DO ANYTHING HE WANTS, including INVITE HIM INTO YOUR HOUSE.  So, you’re pretty much screwed either way, as RAG#1 quickly learns . . .

Inside the house, we meet RAG#2, who’s just as sassy as  RAG#1, and just as unwilling to be hospitable to the Poor Unfortunate Klaus . . .

“I’m not Southern either.  I’m from the Bronx, B*TCH!” 

 But it turns out, there’s a method to Klaus’ madness.   After all, he happens to know that RAG #1 and RAG#2 have a third roommate . . . a WEREWOLF ROOMMATE . .  . one who comes home once a month to “go through his changes” in the basement.   At first, RAG#2 tries to cover for her wolfy friend.  However, as soon as it becomes apparent that Klausipoo won’t take no for an answer, she eventually gives up the goods.

And that’s when Stefan comes in . . .

Mind if I borrow a cup of sugar?”

You see, the Original Were Vamp, is just too Big and Powerful to be bothered with such petty insignificant tasks as MURDERING PEOPLE, so he has his new boyfriend do the dirty work for him.  But Klaus isn’t completely heartless.  He rewards RAG#1’s “kindness,” by instructing Stefan to give her a faster, less painful, death than RAG#2.  (How sweet?)  Then, he gleefully skips off to his car (which, is in total working order, by the way), while Mini Me finishes the job .  . .

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HOTTEST . . . DEATH . . . SCENE . . . EVER!

Uh oh!  It looks like SOMEONE needs a bib . . .

Always Start Your Morning, By Washing Your “Baby Elephant” .  . .

“My, how you have grown, Little Brother . . . (and I’m not talking about your height).”

From Tennessee, we head back to Mystic Falls, where Mopey Sad Emo Music is playing, while Mopey Sad Elena stares out the window, longing for her long lost Hungry Hungry Hippo of a Boyfriend . . .

*sigh* “I’m so sad and lonely.  I haven’t had sex, since Damon screwed my brains out, two nights ago ALL SUMMER.  I wonder if it’s possible for one’s hymen to grow back, from lack of use  . . .”

 But don’t feel too bad for Elena.  There is hope for her, yet!  After all, she is wearing her Trusty Ponytail.  And whenever Ponytail Elena comes to town, fun times are never far behind . . .

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It becomes apparent that, in Useless Aunt Jenna’s absence, Elena has assumed the “motherly” role in the Gilbert household.  Immediately upon waking, Elena heads to a Holy-Crap-When-Did-He-Get-So-Buff, Almost-Death-Definitely-Becomes-Him Jeremy’s bedroom to wake him up for his new job at the Only Bar / Social Establishment in Mystic Falls .  . .

“Dreaming about Vicki Anna my Bon Bon has given me a Bone Bone . . .”

Elena then heads downstairs to help Couch Surfing Chunky Monkey Alchy-ric make some coffee, as she chats on the phone with an overly perky Caroline, who, despite it obviously still being very early in the morning, is already laden down with shopping bags.   (Because, even though Mystic Falls only has one bar / social establishment, it is somehow awash in shopping malls.)

“Is this where you pour the vodka?” 

Since Caroline is meeting Future Sex Toy Tyler for Lunch, she doesn’t have much time to talk to the birthday girl.  So, she simply reminds her about the evenings party plans, and instructs her to call Lizard Forbes, who, apparently has a new tip for her about Stefan’s possible whereabouts.

So, of course, Ponytail Elena has to head directly to DAMON’S BEDROOM to tell him all about it, right? (hint, hint, wink, wink)  Unfortunately, for her, though, Damon isn’t there alone . . . He’s got a LADY FRIEND with him . .  . one that might look a bit familiar to some of you.  ME!  IT”S ME!  No it’s not.  😦  But, I wish it was . . .

“I’m BAAAACK!  (For another twenty minutes, anyway.)” 

So, remember how last season, Damon compelled Andie to go away, and never come back, when he got too overwhelmed with his feelings for Elena to continue the Crazy Compulsion Charade, he had going on with a certain local newscaster?  Yeah, well, so much for that.  Now, she’s back to wandering around La Casa de Rich and Awesome, like she owns the place, and commenting about Damon’s Bad Champagne Breakfast Habits, while he bathes in his Teeny Tiny Tub.  (Champagne Breakfast?  What happened to the Bourbon Breakfast?)

Chicks dig champagne. Bourbon is for the bros, yo!

Then again, the fact that Andie is able to sass Damon the way that she does in this scene — even going as far as to say that she is “not his slave” (Oh, if only she knew!) — illustrates that our Bad Boy may finally be growing up . . . orrrr . . . maybe not . . .

Immediately, upon hearing Elena enter his bedroom, Damon struts toward her, in all his naked glory, not so subtly giving her a peek at the Baby Elephant (with the massively LONG trunk) responsible for blowing bubbles all over his unmentionables . . .

“Here’s looking at YOU, Ponytail Elena.”

Elena tries to carry on a conversation with Damon about Stefan’s possible whereabouts, but, honestly, she seems a bit distracted .  . . And how could she not be when that Baby Elephant keeps waving his trunk at her, begging her to come and play . . .

“Not now, Little Elephant . . . I’m busy . . .” 

“Damon, we really have to find . . .you’re weiner  . .  . sooo big . .  . must . . . touch . .  . ummm . . . wait . . .What was I saying?” 

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“Hey Elena, my eyes are up here!”

Damon initially blows off Elena’s Hot Tip from Lizard Forbes About Stefan’s Whereabouts, claiming that it will probably be another stale lead, just like all the rest.  And yet, after she leaves, we see him put the piece of paper containing the tip on a BIG ASS STALKER BOARD in his closet, which is completely FILLED with similar “Where in the World is Stefan Salvatore?” clues.  Apparently, he, Andie, and Alaric have been on the case, all summer, without Elena’s knowledge.  And you just KNOW Ponytail Elena is not going to like that ONE BIT, when she finds out . . .

Meanwhile, over at the Only Bar / Social Establishment in Mystic Falls . . .

Come to The Mystic Grill: Where the Food’s So Good, Even the Dead Can’t Stay Away . . .

“Oh crap!  I’m starting to itch.  I think Ghost Vicki just gave me Ghost Crabs.” 

“I’m sorry about that.  I think I got them from this guy named Casper.  They don’t call him the ‘Friendly Ghost’ for nothing.”

Newly Buff Jeremy is hanging out in the kitchen at the Only Bar / Social Establishment in Mystic Falls, chatting on the phone with his BonBon . . .

She apparently, spent the summer somewhere elsewhere (Hogwarts, perhaps?), though I’m honestly not sure where she would go, considering her grandma is already dead, and I’ve come to the conclusion that she doesn’t actually have parents.

Speaking of BonBon and JerBear, have you ever noticed that HALF of their relationship takes place on technological devices, like Skype and the iPhone?  How NERDY is that?  Even if Jeremy WASN’T hanging out with his dead ex-girlfriends all the time, I would take this as a BAD SIGN for the future of their relationship.  I mean, cyber sex is fun and all.  But it doesn’t exactly keep you warm at night, if you catch my drift . . .

“I’m magically sending you a blow job sex vibes through the phone, JerBear . . .” 

Jeremy apparently, hasn’t gotten around to telling Bonnie about his Ghosts of Girlfriends’ Past, probably because (1) it’s pretty much HER FAULT that he’s seeing them in the first place  (That’s what happens when you piss off Dead Witches, by asking them for help every five minutes); and (2) he doesn’t want her to feel guilty . . . or jealous.

Enter Matt the Grouch, who’s insisting that Jeremy take over his section, because he doesn’t want to serve soon-to-be lovebirds his former best friend Tyler, or his former girlfriend, Caroline, who are eyef*cking eachother so intensely at their table, that baby werevamps may very well be inches away from popping out of Caroline’s vampire uterus . . .

“Harder . . . harder Tyler, yes!”

“Was it as good for you, as it was for me?”

 Blatant eyesex aside, Caroline just CAN’T, for the life of her, understand why Tyler’s MOTHER would possibly think the two of them are DATING?  I mean, what on EARTH would give her THAT idea . . .

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“We’re practically f*&king together all the time, Caroline.  It’s not much of a leap,” explains Tyler with smirk, mixed with naughty thoughts, adoration, and longing.

As seems to be the norm on this show, we once again have a male character who’s caught on to the extent of his romantic feelings, more quickly than his female counterpart.  And the fact that a formerly, Wham Bam, Thank You Random Slut guy like Tyler loves Caroline enough, that he’s willing to spend the entire summer in the Supposed Friend Zone, just for the opportunity to be close to her, says an awful lot about how far he’s come since Season 1 . . .

Mommy LIKE! 

Speaking of a couple who  are trying to deny that they have the hots for one another, let’s check back in on Klaus and Stefan, shall we?

“Come with me, Stefan .  . . on a magical journey into my pants.” 

We’re Not in Seventh Heaven Anymore . . .

“Hey there, Stefan.  Can I just tell you, I’m a huge fan.  And I’m so honored to get to be a guest star on this wonderful show.  Wait. .  . you want me to WHAT?   STAND STILL, AND HAVE DARTS THROWN REPEATEDLY AT MY HEAD AND OTHER UNMENTIONABLE PARTS OF MY BODY?  That’s not cool!  Can’t I be the guy who has sex with Caroline, instead?”

So, apparently, that werewolf who Klaus and Stefan have been looking for all summer has a name, and that name is Ray.  Unfortunately, for “Ray,” I’m just going to call him Seventh Heaven Guy, because that’s who he will forever be to me . . .

Seriously, don’t you want to just pinch his cute little face right off?  (I know Stefan does . . .)

Apparently, Klaus has been having a REALLY difficult time finding werewolves to join his Little Werevamp Club, considering Stefan and Co. killed most of them, last season.  Seventh Heaven Guy seems like his only viable option.  So, Klaus would really like the hairy blonde to take him to his pack leader.

“Hey, don’t I know you from that TV show with the guy from Teen Wolf, and the girl who dated Justin Timberlake?”

Watching Klaus and Stefan attempt to “negotiate” with Seventh Heaven Guy, you really start to get a sense of their “team dynamic.”  Sure, Stefan is technically “working” for Klaus, but there’s also a little bit of a Mutual Admiration Society going on here.  While Klaus acts as the Brains and the Mouthpiece of the Operation, Stefan stands beside him as the Silent Enforcer, patiently waiting to strike the pair’s next unwitting victim.  In some sense, this makes Stefan more frightening than Klaus, because you never really know what’s going on behind those cold, hungry eyes of his . . .

Another interesting thing about this NEW incarnation of Stefan, he KICKS ASS at compulsion.  Back in the first two seasons of the show, we almost NEVER saw Stefan compel anybody.  That was always more Damon’s bag.  There were a couple of reasons for this.  The first, was that, while on his bunny diet, Stefan didn’t have the strength to be particularly successful at compulsion.

He MAY have compelled the bunnies, though . . . 

The second was that Stefan was always “the good brother.”  And “good brothers” don’t mind control . . .

And yet, here, we learn that Ripper Stefan has compelled an ENTIRE BAR not to help Seventh Heaven Guy, while he is being tortured!  Now, that’s impressive  .  . .

Almost as impressive as a Double De-Hearting.  (We miss you, Elijah!) 

Speaking of compulsion, Seventh Heaven Guy claims he can’t be compelled, which is interesting, to say the least.  Is Seventh Heaven Guy on vervain, or is there something about werewolves (like Tyler) that makes them immune to compulsion?  Klaus was able to compel the girls in the first scene, but it is uncertain whether those two were ACTUALLY werewolves, or just friends with one.  (I’m assuming the latter, since Klaus would have probably wanted them as part of his army TOO, if they were the former.)

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Anywhoo . . . Stefan decides to elicit the whereabouts of his pack from Seventh Heaven Guy, by playing a little game called Truth or Wolfsbane.  However, he ends up just randomly throwing darts at his head . . .  which shouldn’t be funny, but TOTALLY IS!

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I wonder how much harder you have to throw a dart to get it to stick in someone’s brain, like that.  Surely, that should be worth extra points, don’t you think?

Reverend Camden would NOT approve . . . 

 While he’s retrieving his darts from Seventh Heaven Guy’s face, we see a little glimpse of Stefan’s old humanity, when he overhears Klaus talking to a random bar wench about how Damon is following him, and must be stopped.  Though Stefan promises to “take care” of his brother, you can tell, based on the expression on his face, that he also wants to protect him from falling into Klaus’ clutches.  Klaus, slyly accepts Stefan’s offer, and turns his attention back to Seventh Heaven Guy, who has finally given him the information he needs.

Klaus then lays Seventh Heaven Guy, Jesus-Style, on a dirty bar table . . .

Inappropriate?

 Once he’s got him in this precarious position, Klaus proceeds to indoctrinate Seventh Heaven Guy into his Big Happy Werevamp family, by feeding him his blood . . .

It sure beats Breast Feeding! 

 . .  . and KILLING HIM!

So, basically, after the first Were Vamp is formed, via sacrifice, subsequent were vamps can be formed pretty much in the same way regular vampires are, except they have to drink a HYBRID’S blood, instead of just a regular vampires.  Of course, this begs the question about the OTHER two individuals who drank Klaus’ blood (Damon and Katherine), who were ALREADY undead when they drank.  Could THEY turn into were-vamps too?

Hmmm . .  . I wonder . .  . 

Meanwhile, elsewhere in Tennessee (because, apparently, it’s like really close to Mystic Falls, Virginia .  . . or something) . . .

Have Blood, Will Travel . . . 

Stefan Salvatore: Turning Girls into Mr. Potato Head, One Dismembered Body Part at a Time .  . .

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“Hey Alaric, up for a game of soccer?”

Alaric and Damon arrive at RAG #1 and RAG #2’s house to find the two girls just chilling on the couch, waiting for Team Badass to arrive.  Then one of them gets so excited at the prospect of seeing Damon, that she loses her head.   (Wouldn’t you?)  Having spent eternity with his brother, Damon immediately recognizes this as Stefan’s Signature Kill.  Apparently, Ripper Stefan gets so hungry while he’s eating that he blacks out, and forgets what he’s doing . . .

Then, he wakes up, and feels guilty.   So, he decides to reassemble  all the body parts he previously ripped / ate off.  How chivalrous of him . . . but also kind of dull.  I mean, why just reattach the SAME head, to the SAME body, when you could MIX AND MATCH?

Psychopath Cannibal FAIL! 

Being the dutiful big bro, Damon kindly torches the house, to protect Stefan’s . . . umm . . . reputation or something?  (Then again, perhaps, he just knew RAG #1 and RAG#2 had a solid fire insurance policy?)

“It really is a shame to put this good head to waste.” 

Speaking of getting and giving head . .  .

“I hope you get lucky, tonight!”

You STOLE my balls, Care!  Give them back (or else, I’ll come over there and take them, by force)” 

Oh my goodness!  How WHIPPED is Tyler, that he actually allowed himself to get roped in to HELPING Caroline and Elena set up for the party?  (Caroline is officially my HERO!)  Elena mentions to her friends that she doesn’t think Damon is trying hard enough to find Stefan, at which point, Tyler can’t help but add his own two cents.  “Maybe he doesn’t WANT to find him?  I mean . . . he’s into you, right?  And you kissed him?  You probably messed with his head!”

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Now, I gotta say, as misplaced and inappropriate as that comment was (and we’ll get to that, in just a bit), Tyler has a point here!  Elena’s declaration that her smooch with Damon was a “goodbye kiss, without the “goodbye,” seems more than a little convenient, in light of recent events.  OF COURSE, it’s going to have an impact on Damon’s psyche that the woman he loves FINALLY made out with him, dying or not . . .  Then again, Damon IS, unbeknownst to Elena, searching for his brother, anyway  . . . so, perhaps, he’s just a bit more “evolved” than Tyler, who, as an only child (LIKE ME!) might not be able to quite grasp the notion of Brotherly Love . . .

Speaking of LOVE, Caroline is NOT TOO PLEASED with Tyler’s little gossipy comment  . . .

And I have to say, while I think it’s adorable that Caroline and Tyler have become close enough “girlfriends,” that Caroline feels free to gossip with him about stuff like this, if I was Elena, I’d be none too pleased with my best friend for sharing my PRIVATE SECRETS with her soon-to-be boyfriend.  Elena doesn’t seem too upset by it, though . . . which is oddly, un-Elena-like of her, don’t you think?  (Perhaps, the PONYTAIL has something to do with that?)

“My ponytail doesn’t care about secrets.  It just wants to f*ck Damon senseless PARTY!”

Speaking of boundaries, Caroline and Tyler, not only don’t seem to have them with Elena, they clearly don’t have any with ONE ANOTHER either.  Observe the candid nature of the pair’s conversation about Tyler’s decision to bring, “Slutty Sophie” (as Caroline calls her) to Elena’s party.  After all, Tyler explains, he’s pretty much been in a DRY SPELL, ALL SUMMER, because he’s spent most it painting Caroline’s toenails and braiding her hair, rather than getting himself laid  . . .

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Tyler’s not the only one who’s sexually frustrated.  Caroline’s crazed for weiner, as well!  And though the pair both chalk their newfound sexual urges up to “supernatural emotions,” I’d venture to guess it has much more with their both being victim to “normal teenage hormones” . . . not to mention the fact that they are . . . “both secretly in love with one another.” 😉

BAM . . . look who just got impregnated. 

Elsewhere, on the OVERWHELMING SEXUAL TENSION front . . .

“It’s Your Party, and You’ll Almost Kiss Damon Cry if You Want To.”

DAMON: “I’m going to pretend that I’m having trouble putting on your necklace, so that I can continue to blow on your neck, and sexily massage your shoulders.”

ELENA:  “And I’m going to lean backwards exaggeratedly, thereby making it much easier for you to ‘accidentally’ fondle my breasts.”

Elena is in Stefan’s room, for a change, getting ready for her party, when she sees Damon watching her through the mirror.  Though the Petrova Doppelganger is clearly, teary and emotional, she ruefully promises not to cry before they cut the cake.  “Hey, it’s your party, you can cry if you want to,” Damon jokes, with just the right amount of concern, sympathy, and lightheartedness . . .

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Damon notices a picture of Stefan and Elena on the dresser, immediately understands the effect it being their must have on Elena (Remember he TOO, is no stranger to pining for potentially lost causes.), and gently gripes about what a pack rat Stefan has become.  (This of course, is another difference between the brothers, since, aside from that MASSIVE SOAP DISH, Damon’s bedroom / bathroom suite is comparatively minimalist.)

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“Oh for Heaven sake!  Will you STOP bringing up the Soap Dish?”

The fact that Damon chose to “re-gift” to Elena the vervain necklace she had first received from Stefan to protect herself from DAMON, of all people, was incredibly sweet and meaninful.  Not only did it illustrate Damon’s understanding of Elena’s feelings for Stefan, it also called to mind the evolution of the DELENA  RELATIONSHIP.  After all, these two have a quite extensive history with that necklace . . .  For starters, there was the time back in Season 1, where Elena willingly took off the vervain necklace, to show Damon that he could trust her (and that she had come to trust him).

And, of course, who could forget the time Damon returned Elena’s necklace to her, in Season 2, only AFTER telling her that he loved her, for the first time, and compelling her to forget it . . .

I love how Elena ASKED Damon to put the necklace on for her, as opposed to the other way around.  I also love the way they stood in the mirror, after he did it, silently observing one another, with tension and longing . . .

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And I DEFINITELY love the way they CLEARLY almost kissed, when Damon first gave her the necklace, and how they bravely walked to the party, arm-in-arm together,  after the gift exchange . . .

ELENA: “My, what big lips you have, Damon!” 

DAMON: “The better to suck your face with, Elena.”

Geez! Do you think I used the word LOVE enough in this section? 😉

Speaking of love, there’s yet another new bromance in town . . .  (Am I noticing a pattern here?)

High Times with Matt and Jeremy (Drunk Times with Alaric and Damon)

First off, I want to say how INCREDIBLY lame it is that Elena’s so-called Bestie, Bonnie, couldn’t even be bothered to make it to her 18th birthday.  FRIEND FAIL!

Oh, WIPE YOUR NOSE! 

Beyond that, Elena’s birthday party was AWESOME!  They don’t have NEARLY enough ragers, in Mystic Falls, in my opinion.  I mean, sure, we’ve seen dances, and movie nights, memorials, and fundraisers.  But these kids are in HIGH SCHOOL for crying out loud.  And what’s high school, without a good old fashioned KEGGAR!  It was really cool to see these uptight supes let loose, for once.

I mean, we get to see Damon and Alaric drink ALL THE TIME!

But watching Elena grab Damon’s cup of bourbon, right out of his hand and chug it down . . .

 .  . . when he wouldn’t let ANYONE ELSE touch his stash . . .

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 . . . watching Caroline chug wine straight from a bottle (more on her, later), and watching an unusually laidback Matt bond with Jeremy over some quality reefer, was just SUPER SATISFYING on so-many levels.  I mean, you can’t battle evil ALL THE TIME, right?

But, since we ARE on the subject of evil . . .

Dead Times with Sex Toy Andie

We knew Stefan was going to have to find a way to “take care” of Damon, in order to prevent Klaus from taking matters into his own hands.  But I don’t think many of us save those who figured it out from the trailers figured his manner of “taking care” of his brother would be this drastic . . .

We randomly find ourselves in the Mystic Falls news room, where Sex Toy Andie is working late, once again.  Suddenly, a light shines in her face, and Stefan materialized before her.  What’s kind of sad is how HAPPY she is to see Stefan, since, she of course, remembers him as the GOOD BROTHER . . .  Then he gets all veiny on her, and she’s probably considering suggesting some Botox options . . .

Enter Damon, who’s clad in blue, while Stefan is clad in his older brother’s trademark black . . .

He’s just received a phone call from Elena, who, after having been told by Caroline that she’s “letting her life pass her by,” finally FOUND his Stefan Stalker Stash.  And she is NOT PLEASED AT ALL!

“Wow, Damon has kind of girly handwriting.”

“Gotta go break up beer bong!” Damon snarks, in an exaggeratedly high pitched voice, that is one step above doing that thing where you blow into the phone and pretend there’s a bad connection, when you don’t want to talk to someone.  (Not that I’ve ever done that, of course.)

Anywhoo, BLACK-CLAD BADASS Stefan approaches Damon, with the words, “Hello Brother,” a nice throwback to Damon’s first words in the pilot . . .

The pair chat amiably for a bit about Stefan’s binge-eating, and Mr. Potato Head creation tendencies.  But Stefan is cold, stiff, and immobile, kind of like a dead guy . . . or undead guy, rather.  He’s not even moved by the mention of Elena, when, usually the mere utterance of her name is enough to spiral the “Good Brother” into hysterics .  . .

And that’s when EVVVVILL Stefan reveals his Big Take Care of Damon magic trick.  With a flourish of his hands, Stefan shows Damon a crying compelled Andie, who is shaking and crying, high above the two brothers on the rafters . . .

A surprisingly frantic Damon, tells her not to move.  Unfortunately (or, fortunately, depending on your feelings about the Sex Toy), Stefan has the compelled the news reporter to do just that.  And so Andie bungee jumps without a chord from the rafters, as Stefan pushes his brother up against a wall, so that he can’t catch her . . .

Sure, the scene was sad.  But, you must admit, that Damon’s face in this picture is HILARIOUS! 

I had always suspected that Damon had come to respect and care about Andie as more than a sex toy / slave.  But it really became apparent, when he leaned dejectedly over her broken and dead body, unable to do anything but say goodbye .  .  . both to his sort-of girlfriend, and his brother’s humanity . . .

 R.I.P. Andie!  Here’s a small tribute to your memory . . .

OK . . . so that was more of a tribute to Damon.  But HEY, it’s the thought that counts, right?

On a MUCH, MUCH lighter note . . .

Speaking of Sex Toys . . .

Bland-But-Slightly -More-Tolerable-When-He’s-Stoned Matt tries to flirt with Caroline, and is abruptly SHOT DOWN!

(Try not to take it personally, Matt.  Jer Bear still loves you!) 

As it turns out, Caroline’s WAY to busy being jealous of Slutty Sophie’s humping of Tyler on the dance floor to give two craps about her ex-beau . . .

Wow, who knew Tyler was so good at Dance Floor Humpage?  VERY impressive! 

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(Clearly, Caroline agrees with me.)

Tyler and Caroline get into a heated argument, after Caroline jealously compels Slutty Sophie to leave the party, therby MAJORLY cockblocking Tyler . . . then again, maybe not.  “If I shouldn’t be dating, all you have to do is say something . . . because I’m not about to get shot down again,” argues Tyler.

And so, just like with their epic first kiss, their second one, begins with an argument about “feelings,” turns into a wall slam, and then, BAM: mouth-f*&king!

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Horny as hell, and not-yet-quite adventurous enough to start having sex right on the floor of La Casa de Rich and Awesome, Caroline and Tyler escape back to Tyler’s bedroom, which, in hindsight, might have been their first big mistake of the evening.  Not that it matters, at the moment, though.  Because right now, Caroline and Tyler are having sex . . . supernatural .  . . super speedy . . . sexy .  . . grunty .  . . groany . .  . moany . . . rough sex.  And life is VERY GOOD!

 

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Life is significantly LESS good for Damon, who is having a VERY bad day . . .

Foreplay Tough Love for Damon and Elena . . .

“You’ve got some ‘splaining to do, Mister!  (Like why the heck didn’t you put all this crap on a computer?  What is this  . . . 1864?)”

Still raw from his run-in with his brother, and the loss of Sex Toy Andie, a not-drunk-enough Damon hobbles back into his room to find Elena (SURPRISE!) dangerously close to his bed. 😉

She’s FURIOUS with Damon for keeping his search for Stefan from her, and understandably so.  But, really, your heart has to go out to Damon in this moment.  Because Damon was always the guy who got to be blase about Elena’s feelings, because he was the one KEEPING HER ALIVE.

Up until now, Damon got to leave all the “emotional stuff” to STEFAN, like, for example, that time when he let Elena think Bonnie had died, so that KLAUS would believe it too.  Damon was OK with being the “Bad Guy,” because he knew he was doing the right thing, and that Stefan would be there to “comfort” Elena, where he couldn’t.  But now, Damon is stuck playing both Elena’s CONFIDANTE and PROTECTOR, and it’s weighing heavily on his conscience.  He DOESN’T want to ruin Elena’s memories of Stefan, no matter how much that might help him in the “getting laid” department . . .

And while the OLD Damon would have rejoiced in telling Elena that Saint Stefan, wasn’t so saintly anymore, the NEW protective Damon is wracked with guilt for the part he feels he’s played in Stefan’s return to the darkside, and how much he knows it will hurt Elena to know what her first love has become.  But still, she needs to know.  And so, he tells her . . .

“Those are not Klaus’ victims, they’re Stefan’s.  He’s left a trail of bodies, up and down the Eastern Seabord.  He’s flipped the switch, Elena.  So, stop looking for him . . . Stop waiting for him.  He’s NOT coming back . . . not in your lifetime.”

Once again, after delivering a speech like this, the OLD Damon would have just stormed out of the room, without a second thought, because THAT would be all that was required to “keep Elena alive.”  But we see Damon hesitate here, as Elena’s eyes begin to tear up.  He stops and reaches out, as if to hug Elena, but ultimately, things better of it and leaves . . .

And it’s an awful moment for the two of them, who are both missing Stefan, for their own reasons, and can’t quite bring themselves to reach out to one another, when they need eachother most . . .

So, of course, Damon responds to these newfound emotions by angrily trashing Stefan’s over-furnished bedroom.  (Now, THAT’S the dark, self-destructive Damon we know and love! ;))

Meanwhile, outside the party (if you could still call it that . . .) . . .

Chunky Monkey?  (Nahh . . . It’s Just Stoned Matt.)

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So, I’ve decided I wouldn’t have despised Matt nearly as much last season, if he was HIGH more often.  High Matt is HILARIOUS!  And I loved the Stoner Comedy Bromance of High Jeremy trying to drive High Matt home, and HIGH Matt inadvertently sitting on Ghost Vicki’s head, when he did so . . .

“I think my brother just farted on me.” 

And yes, yes, I know it was supposed to be all “creepy” and “scary” how Vicki ominously begged for Jeremy to HELP HER, and Anna stared stonily at him from outside his car.

But honestly, I found this storyline to be more comic relief, than anything else.  Particularly, when Matt came back to Jeremy’s house, after the party, to eat all of Alaric’s Chunky Monkey . . .

“You know, Useless Aunt Jenna always used to eat Alaric’s Chunky Monkey too . . . he didn’t seem to mind.”

CHUNKY MONKEY!!!!!!

 . . . and Jeremy tried to confide in Matt about the whole, “I see dead people” thing, . . .

 . . . and Matt pretty much chalked Jeremy’s visions up to loneliness and BAD WEED.  But, honestly, wouldn’t you, if you lived ANYWHERE ELSE BESIDES MYSTIC FALLS?

MATT:  “Don’t YOU wanna get WITH this?  Have I mentioned, I’m single?”

JEREMY:  “Yes, about 18 times.  And in the car, on the way home, you SANG it.”

A Plain Old Walk of Shame is Looking Pretty Good Right Now, Isn’t it Caroline?

Sometimes, karma can be a b*tch.  Like when you plan to sneak off on your new Boy Toy, while he’s still asleep, in order to avoid a “potentially awkward conversation.”

And your new Boy Toy’s mom comes in, and randomly shoots you with what looks like a Toy Gun from the movie Star Wars . . .

“Ummm . . . Tyler . . . I hate to break it to you considering we just f*&ked and all but I think your Mom is secretly Darth Vader.”

*breathes heavily* “Ty-ler . . . I am your Mo-ther.”

“You have a Collect Call from Ripper Stefan.  Do You Accept the Charges?  (Because if you don’t, he’ll eat you.)”

Some happy birthday, Elena has had!  After the party, she comes back to her kitchen to find Alaric bailing.  Because, you know, sitting around completely wasted at a party while underage kids drink and have sex, either makes you the WORST or the COOLEST chaperone ever, I can’t decide which.

“Don’t be too hard on yourself, Alchy-ric!  I mean, hey, you were a WAY better guardian than Useless Aunt Jenna!  At least you never let evil supernatural creatures who wanted to kill me into the house!  That’s a definite plus next to your name!” 

Alaric tells Elena that she can do a better job raising herself, and Jeremy, without him.  And while that might be true, I still think it was kind of lame of him to ditch her on her birthday, especially in light of all that had happened, during this episode . . .

But don’t worry, Ric, I’m sure I’ll love you again tomorrow . . . and the day after that .  . . and the day after that .  . .

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(I’m not sure I’m entirely digging your new, “I’m Depressed” Hairdo though . . . You might want to get that checked out by a stylist . . .)

“I’m way too engrossed in my “Man Pain,” to engage in normal hygiene procedures, like showering, shaving and stuff . . .Maybe, I’ll consider doing those things, if I ever get another non-vampire girlfriend again . . .”

In the final moments of the episode, Elena heads upstairs to find a hand-drawn artistic card from Jeremy (Nice touch remembering he has Mad Art Skillz, Writers!), right next to Elena’s trademark stuffed teddy bear . . .

I’d sleep with them BOTH! 

Then, she ALMOST misses a call from Stefan the Mouth Breather, but manages to pick it up . . .

 

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For the past two seasons, TVD fans have been forever searching for signs of Damon’s humanity.  And, I suspect, this season will be about watching for the signs of the RETURN of Stefan’s.  The fact that Elena’s reminder to him that she still LOVES HIM, brings him to tears, tells us that he hasnt TOTALLY given in to his vampiric impulses  . . . yet . . .

Of course, on the other hand, if Stefan’s love for his brother, and his reassurance of Elena’s love for HIM are all that’s keeping him from going FULL RIPPER, what would happen if BOTH of those individuals ended up betraying his love .  . . together?

Ripper Stefan is at a precipice right now.  He could really go either way.  And Klaus’ prediction that, with each kill, Stefan will find it easier and easier to let go of his humanity, might very soon prove to be prophetic . . .

And there you have it folks . . . the Season 3 Premiere of TVD in a VERY LARGE nutshell . . . SOOOOO .  . . tell me . . . what did you think? 😉

[www.juliekushner.com][Fangirls Forever]

45 Comments

Filed under The Vampire Diaries

45 responses to “High, Horny, Hot, Headless, and Hungry (HOORAY!) – A Recap of The Vampire Diaries’ Season 3 Premiere “The Birthday”

  1. East Coast Captain

    Well jewls, its great to be back after all these months. This new episode really was…it exceeded by expectations.

    First of all Rippah Stefan is…Awesome, terrifying, vulnerable and did I awesome? He sure is Awesome and even more awesome. He is very creative he gives Damon a run for his money in that evil vamp department. Its been said he´ll be a Rippah for most of the season which is… very Awesome and more awesome. But I think this is his persona like Angelus was too Angel. This season won´t be the last with Rippah Stefan he´ll surface again if there´s more seasons.

    But the Delena moments were sweet but Elena is naive, Stefan is a vampire and he maybe or was a nice guy but he´s a vampire, a lion at his core. Fortunately she looked super hot in that dress.

    So what if Tyler and Caroline are mortal enemies? That kind of talk really sounds like reverse racism, you can´t date a vampire because there your enemy since Foyler was super hot. Fang and Fur.

    Poor Andie I felt bad for her but that´s what you get when you leak a script, I heard Julie was not very happy with Dawn. But I think it would be something if Stefan had given her his blood and she´d come back as a vampire later in the season. But that´s unlikely.

    If Delena ended up together in bed, Rippah Stefan would be there forever and I think he would control his urges it would be something if he could be a Rippah but for the good guys.

    I wish Carol 100,000 fiery deaths, it will be sweet to see her face when she discovers that Tyler isn´t human himself and that there are tons of nasty beasties out there. Although I WISH Rippah Stefan would come for her and rescue his little adoptive progeny.

    So that´s how you turn someone into a hybrid although I think vampires cannot be turned into hybrids since there already undead and I believe the blood has gone out of Damon and Katherine´s systems but I think if vampires can be turned into hybrids it might be a different way of turning them but who knows Klaus does have something planned for Stefan.

    Great episode all and all and Damon now knows what its like for the shoe to be on the other foot, in Season 1 it was him doing the tormenting now its Stefan what goes around comes around but all will be forgiven in the end.

    • Hey there, East Coast Captain! You are absolutely right. Just as we’ve seen him surface a few times, during the first two seasons, both in flashbacks, and once in Real Life (during Miss Mystic Falls), I believe that, like Angelus, Ripper Stefan is essentially another character on the show, one who, like Vampire Katherine, will continue to pop up throughout the series. Of course, an interesting difference between Angelus and Ripper Stefan, is that, from what I recall, Angelus was a magical manifestation of what happened to Angel when he slept with Buffy. What’s intriguing about Ripper Stefan, is that Ripper Stefan IS Stefan. And, he emerges, as a result of Stefan’s conscious decision to take that flying leap “off the wagon.”

      Hmmm, interesting point about Elena. You know, I’m not so sure she’s naive, anymore. I think, initially, Elena was able to separate who Ripper Stefan was in the past, from the person she loves. But Elena’s phone call to Stefan at the end of the episode seemed to suggest that she understands that this is the same person, more so, perhaps, even than Damon. If Ripper Stefan WAS Angelus, her words on the phone would not have been able to affect him like they did. Of course, this means that Stefan has to take accountability for his actions as Ripper, in a way that Angel doesn’t necessarily have to for his actions as Angelus, which only serves to make things more interesting, I think.

      I also like your argument that, while it makes sense for VAMPIRES not to date WEREWOLVES, due to the whole “a werewolf bite can kill a vampie thing,” the reverse assumption makes less logical sense, thereby making me wonder what Mama Lockwood’s motivations were at the end of the episode, for doing what she did. And yes, those two are pretty damn good at sex! 😉

      Hmmm do you really think, Andie died as a result of the script leak? I don’t know . . . I sort of feel like the moment they introduced the character, she was doomed to die at a vampire’s hand. I was actually very surprised last season, when Damon compelled her to leave, and it seemed like she might actually survive being Damon’s girlfriend. 🙂 On the other hand, since she DID have an understandable exit last season, it really DID seem like the writers brought her back JUST to kill her. And yet, from Dawn Olivieri’s perspective, that was one extra paycheck she got to collect, even if it closes off the possibility of her return (except, maybe as a ghost). That being said, I almost wish Damon brought her back as a vamp, just so she could remember all that compulsion and learn what a SLAVE she actually was. 😉

      I’m also curious if Stefan would be able to return to “the good guys,” knowing that the two reasons he kept himself from going off the edge were together. Of course, since I LOVE Delena, and I do enjoy my Ripper Stefan, at least to some extent, I would love it if that happened. I’m just not sure Stefan would be able to cope with it, as his brother has . . . seeing the woman he loves with another man, day in, and day out. Unlike Damon, Stefan has not yet had the experience of NOT being the Chosen One . . . interesting. 😉

      You make another insightful point about the hybrids. I DO wonder if Klaus plans to make Stefan one of his own. After all, he would seem to be a much surer ally than the strangers we see him converting in The Hybrid. Then again, perhaps, Klaus’ ultimate plans for Stefan are even more sinister than that. Of course, right now, it seems like Klaus has a bit of a soft spot for Stefan. Then again, he seemed to have a soft spot for his brother too, and look how that turned out. 🙂

      Also, yes, it was interesting seeing Damon having to take on the role of reluctant hero, cleaning up his brother’s messes and protecting Elena’s feelings, as well as her body. I wonder if Damon will eventually end up rebelling against those expectations. Now THAT would be intriguing to see 😉

      Thanks again for your brilliant commentary. It’s always a pleasure talking vampires and werewolves with you, East Coast Captain.

  2. serendipity

    Awesome, Julie! And yesss! We’re back on for another rollercoaster ride, looks like!

    First off, yay for Damon in the bathtub! 😀 On seeing the promo, I’d already guessed that he’d been taking a bath instead of a shower because of the soapy suds all over his drool worthy torso… So cocky and so Damon, the way he just comes out of the bathtub and struts around completely naked! And all because sex-toy Andie refuses to cater to his every whim (as WE undoubtedly would LOL) 😉 so the guy must go in search of his own refill of champers. Can he help it that Elena chose right then to barge in? LOL ‘You must have heard me come in’… Yes, Elena, he probably did. What’s your point exactly? Or your problem? 😀

    Sex-toy Andie… well, I had the feeling her role would be played out pretty soon, and I wasn’t exactly surprised it was by Stefan’s hands. It was actually just like ‘ripper’ Stefan: maybe he’s not totally gone (as his crying bout at the end suggests), but he’s far gone nonetheless, to care so little about human life, especially the life of a human he knows, and one he knows Damon cares for to some extent. Isn’t it ironic that at the end of last season he accuses Damon of hurting Andie (or some such thing), when he’s the one that now kills her? Damon would never have killed Andie that at this point (as they clearly showed us when he just threw her out instead of killing her at the end of season 2).

    Ripper Stefan is really chillyfying (borrowed that word from Shadowfaxangel 🙂 ). He’s so coolly calculating and cold that it’s awesome to see. And he’s totally acting like a good wingman, or maybe more like Klaus’ ‘enforcer’, with the pouch of wolfsbane at the ready to prod unwilling doggies into cooperating? The guy’s just so good at torture, it’s … yes, again: chillyfying! I mean, come on: he dips the darts in wolfsbane mixed in liquor before he throws them! Remember Damon with his fire iron and his bushels of wolfsbane for Mason? That had nothing on this! Just like the girls on the couch – so serial killer MO of doing something with those dead bodies like piecing them back together after you ‘ripped’ them apart (well, I guess the name had to come from somewhere). Didn’t Damon say he torched the house because Stefan doesn’t care about being found out, but he (Damon) does? Goes to show what a long way they both travelled since standing on the roof at the beginning of season 1, with Damon threatening to expose Stefan, no?

    I felt really sorry for Damon when he had to tell Elena about Stefan’s relapse into ripperdom right after seeing Andie’s Stefan-induced demise. Okay, so he told her like the old Damon would have (but she needed to hear it, I guess 😉 ) but then he’s almost reconsidering, wanting to comfort her. Aww, so sweet! She’s not disbelieving for long though: I think she must have realised fairly quickly that Damon was right…

    Loved the exchange of the not-gift gift between Damon and Elena. I totally agree with you that it’s significant that he keeps giving her the necklace back (though I honestly don’t recall when or where she lost it this time? Was it Klaus taking it away from her?), especially as it will also protect her from him (as it was originally meant to do), which proves all the more that he wants it to be real between them. Also love the way he escorts her to the party like they’re already an item. Just like the way she grabs his glass of bourbon and chugs it down, and then returns it. That’s a very coupley thing to do IMO 😉 On top of which, yes, you are so right! We haven’t ever seen them drinking so much in this show. They’re losing a lot of money on possible product placement here, don’t you think? Talk about setting a bad example 😉 They’re even drinking way more heavily on this show than they ever did on TB!

    And finally, I’m not surprised there’s something else we have in common… I’m an only child too!

    Oh, yes, almost forgot… the role reversal was very clear, like you said, with Stefan in black and Damon in blue, and also the ‘hello, brother’ Stefan used, referring to Damon’s first ever greeting of him back in season 1… I totally called that one 😉 I hope this will inspire me some for Shadowdancing anyway, as I’m (for the nth time) a bit stuck… 😦 Vacation is obviously so not good for vampire escapism writing…

    Looking forward to next week: the show AND your recap of course!

    • How cool that you are an only child too, serendipity! Amy (from Imaginary Men) is as well. Hmmm . . . I wonder if there is some statistical connection between being an only child and loving to write and / or loving vampires. Perhaps, we in particular, are drawn to these fangtastic creatures because, unlike werewolves, who run in packs, vampires tend to be highly independent, and capable of taking care of their physical and emotional needs on their own, much like only children. Just a thought. 😉

      LOL. Yeah, Elena, much like Caroline early in the episode (“Us . . . dating? . . . Crazy!”), is definitely in a stage of, thou doth protest too much. Though she ACTED annoyed that Damon flashed her in that way, she most certainly did not LOOK annoyed. 😉 And yes, I probably would be a TOTALLY whipped girlfriend, and would have ran to fetch the champagne for Damon. Kudos to Andie for developing a bit of a backbone, since last season. You know, it’s kind of unfortunate that we never got to see much of non-compulsed Andie, because she probably had the potential to be a pretty strong, independent, female character.

      On the other hand, Damon’s single again . . . ELENA! 😉

      When you think about it, it was PRETTY DARN AWFUL of Stefan to use Andie, of all people, to get Damon to stay away from him. After all, hasn’t it always been Stefan who said that it was OK that Damon loved Elena, because loving Elena kept Damon “human?” He HAD to realize that, while Damon was most certainly NOT in love with Andie, he HAD grown to care about her in a very HUMAN way. And by killing Andie, Stefan had effectively murdered a HUMAN part of his brother as well. In fact, now that I think about it, its kind of akin to Damon killing Lexi, back in Season 1 . . . well . . . maybe not that extreme, since Stefan and Lexi have a much stronger history than Damon and Andie ever would . . . but close.

      I LOVE the term chillyfying to descibe Ripper Stefan. So VERY appropriate. There is just something about the cold, calculating, look Stefan gets in his eyes, when he’s about to strike out on his next victim, that physically produces chills. And I do wonder whether the wolfsbane darts idea was Stefan’s or Klaus’. Pretty ingenious, either way. Don’t you think? Poor Seventh Heaven Guy! 🙂

      It is interesting how far someone like Damon, who seemed SO intent on destroying Mystic Falls, back in Season 1 (though I really do think that his threats to expose Stefan were just empty threats, in the end), will go to protect humanity from knowing about vampirism. I mean, it’s one thing for Damon to take a seat on the Anti-Vampire council, to protect the vampires in MYSTIC FALLS from being exposed, but to head all the way down to Tennessee to clean up kills there? It seems a little much . . .

      After all, most of Klaus’ and Stefan’s kills from the summer had been chalked up to animal attacks. And, though this one looked much more like the work of a sadistic serial killer, I don’t necessarily think police investigators would look at what happened and immediately think “vampire.” (And, if they did, and were ever “clever” enough to track down Stefan and Klaus, that would most certainly be the end of them!) In fact, if anything, that house had within it a much higher risk for WEREWOLVES’ exposure, due to the creepy dungeon in the basement . . .

      Yep, as Nina in Anchorage mentioned (though, admittedly, I missed the line too), Elena’s necklace was found at Alaric’s house. I assume Klaus or Greta removed it from Elena’s neck on the night of the Sacrifice (though I don’t think they ever actually needed to compel her). But how sweet is it, that Damon waited until Elena’s birthday to give it back to her? And you just know that he refrained from compelling her all summer, though he, of course, could have, many times (assuming she hasn’t been DRINKING vervain, which I imagine, she has been).

      I’d like to think that after that first necklace exchange, Elena’s vervain necklace has come to represent Damon’s and Elena’s unique bond, which is characterized by mutual trust and honesty. It is fitting (though of course, not intentional) that the night Damon gave Elena back her necklace, also ended up being the night he came (somewhat) clean to her about what has been going on with Stefan this summer.

      Speaking of fitting, the parallels between YOUR fanfiction Damon and Ripper Stefan reunion and the one in this episode were absolutely uncanny! I told you that you could write for this show! (And I’m serious, by the way. If you ever get a chance, definitely try your hand at writing a TVD spec script. You could get the format for one online. You just never know, where it might take you! ;))

      Here’s hoping The Birthday, has reawakened your writing muse, once again. And hey, if all else fails, you could always try plying your characters with alcohol again! 😉 It works on the show! 🙂

  3. East Coast Captain

    But I´m a little disappointed with Klaus he´s suppose to be this big bad villain but Stefan is like a mob enforcer, the muscle while Klaus sits back. But I agree that Stefan makes an awesome bad vampire more so than Damon did in Season 1.

    • True, East Coast Captain, I’d prefer to see Klaus get his hands a bit dirtier than he has been so far. I mean, why does Klaus even NEED Stefan to do his kills for him, when he’s powerful enough to kill anybody and anything? I suspect it has something to do with Klaus’ master plan for Stefan, which involves the latter completely relinquishing his grip on humanity. But I guess that remains to be seen . . .

      Another interesting point . . . isn’t it strange that an Original can compel a VAMPIRE (which is something no other vampire can do), but not a WEREWOLF (assuming, of course, that Seventh Heaven Guy wasn’t on vervain, in last night’s episode)? I wonder if Originals can compel OTHER supernatural creatures, like witches or ghosts . . .

  4. Lauren Knott

    OMG, Klaus is so hot. The fact that he’s a psycho hybrid is kind of besides the point for me. I guess I’m twisted? Whatever. All I want to do is cuddle with him, but he’d probably eat me.

    I’m not completely sold on Rippah Stefan yet. I guess it’s because he’s still feeling guilty about murder and whatever. I think he needs to calm down, though. He’s with Mr. Sexy British Pants now!

    Oh, God Damon please CUT YOUR HAIR!

    Tyler and Caroline finally did it. Yay? I’m not completely sold on the Tyler/Caroline thing either. Tyler wasn’t even all that likable until the second season, and I still really like Matt, even though he does kind of bore me. And everyone’s all mad at Carol Lockwood, but I thought that was kind of badass. I like Carol better than I like Liz Forbes.

    I bet David Gallagher was like, “WTF I want back on 7th Heaven!!”

    I’m not all that interested in Jeremy’s storyline. I guess some things never change?

    Alaric needs to shave. He can grieve without that damn beard.

    All in all, it was a great episode. That last scene was so sad. Poor Elena and Stefan! R.I.P., Andie! I’ve always thought you were an okay lady! And God, Klaus is so hot. Those dimples and that ridiculous British accent. I’m crushing (Don’t worry, Elijah will always be my favorite Original Vamp. And Damon . . . cut your hair!!)

    P.S., have you checked out The Secret Circle? I thought it was pretty good. I don’t know if it will be as popular as The Vampire Diaries. And also, Gale Harold is the hottest guy on the show. He reminds me so much of Elijah. I guess it’s the hair? Anyway, he will fill the Elijah-shaped hole in my heart.

    • imaginarymen

      Lauren if loving Klaus is wrong, I don’t want to be right! Also – “Mr. Sexy British Pants” = me giggling madly.

      and “Oh, God Damon please CUT YOUR HAIR” is likely going to be my mantra all season. WHAT is going on there??!

    • Hey Lauren! This line cracked me up: “All I want to do is cuddle with him, but he’d probably eat me. ”

      True . . . Klaus would probably eat you, if you tried to cuddle with him. But what a way to go, right? 😉

      Haha, and I do suspect that it won’t be long now, before Stefan retires his broody hero cape, and becomes part of Team Mr. Sexy British Pants, for good .. . well, at least for a good portion of this season.

      LOL, yeah, I’ll admit Damon’s hair looked a little odd in the bathtub / soapy naked scene. I mean, why wasn’t it the least bit wet? 😉 It looked a bit better in the party scenes, when he had it more slicked back and styled. Either way, he’s going to have to cut it, eventually. If not, it will get in the way of his people eating. And he will have to tie it back in a ponytail, in order to do that, which is SO not badass. 😉

      And I agree, as annoyed as I was by Carol Lockwood and her dumb-looking taser gun, I will NEVER hate her as much as that awful Lizard Forbes, who I will never be able to forgive for wanting to KILL HER OWN DAUGHTER. (Sorry, Andre, if you are reading this. ;))

      LOL. I do think Elijah is going to start to get jealous of your new love affair with Klaus, Lauren. 😉 Speaking of Elijah, it’s funny how much we all ADORE his long hair, but dislike it on Alaric and Damon . . . (and Klaus for that matter, remember his LION HEAD ‘do from the 1492 flashbacks? Weird.)

      I actually just caught Secret Circle last night. (I missed the premiere, due to recapping responsibilities ;)). It’s funny, I watched a six minute preview for it, and wrote a recap for that preview, a few months ago. And the preview pretty much spoiled the entire episode for me, from beginning to end. That being said, I liked the show, and thought it had potential. The acting was decent (though I’m not quite sold on the inevitable love triangle yet), and some of the characters were fun. And you are right, EVIL Gale Harold was the hottest one on the show, by far. He could probably pass for Daniel Gillies’ older brother!

      Oh, and I HATE the Secret Circle theme song! Every time I hear that high-pitched voice sing “da-da, da-da, daaaaaaa,” I want to PUNCH something! I hope they switch it for something a little edgier, in the future. After all, CW shows are typically known for their cool indie soundtracks, among other things. 🙂

  5. Nina in Anchorage

    Damon said he found the necklace in Alaric’s loft, so I’m guessing Klaus left it there. I like guys with long hair, so I like his hair, don’t like Jeremy’s new ‘do, and yeah, ‘Ric needs to shave.

    • Hey Nina! You are absolutely right about Elena’s necklace. I’m guessing Greta took it off Elena on the night of the Sacrifice, and left it at Alaric’s house. Because, even though Alaric was back in his own body at the time, Klaus and crew were still taking up residence there through the season finale. 🙂 Perhaps, that’s why Alaric hasn’t shaved all summer. He left his razor in HIS OWN house, and didn’t want to have to borrow anyone else’s. 🙂

  6. Tricus

    I thought this frist epi was great, not AWESOME. Loved DE always in each others personal space talking or arguing. Loved the necklace scene and the Damon coming out of the bathtub naked to “confront” Elena. LOL
    Seriously why does all these girls gravitate to Damon’s bedroom, especially Elena.
    Caro was hididng out in there too when Elena “found” Damon’s hidden Stefan tracking papers.
    Anyway speaking of Caro, I think her and Tyler jumped into bed kind of fast. I expected a makeout session, like MAJOR, not full on sex so soon. I guess they did have all summer to hang out together and build up to this.
    Damon with his funny quips. Love it.
    Stefan had/has potential to be a GREAT ripper but sorry him crying when Elena said she loved him at the end ruined all the “badness” he had during the episode. He could have just like gritted his teeth emotionally or looked sad , if the writers wanted to go there, but not full on crying.
    Yeah I know he is not a “full” ripper yet BUT that part just ruined the moment for me.
    Even though I hope Damon continues to be protective, caring and loving to Elena , her friends and the gang, I want to see him get cold, brutal and murdurous as I KNOW he can be. I want him to become frustrated and angry at Klaus, Stefan and their killing actions which ultimately bring too much attention to Mystic Falls by authorities or Klaus hurt/kill someone close to Damon. Like Stefan turned his switch, I want to see Damon do so also, even briefly or when needed so that he even scares Elena, Alaric etc..

    You mentioned about Klaus feeding his blood to the werewolf and then killing him to experiment if the guy will awaken as a werevamp. Like you I wonder if that can happen to Damon. I would LOVE it to happen to him. I don’t remember Katherine drinking Klaus blood. I remember him biting her arm then they watched as her wound healed on its own.
    Maybe I’m wrong?
    Anyway like I said great epi.

    • Hey Tricus! Thanks so much for your awesome comment. Great point about Damon’s bedroom! 🙂 You know, I’ve always joked about Elena’s tendency to “hang out” there, since Season 2. But I guess she’s not the only one! (I know I would want to hang out there . . . particularly if there was a good chance I’d run into Naked Damon. Wouldn’t you?)

      As far as Caroline, though, I suspect she was in there, because she knew he had blood to spare, Stefan probably didn’t keep blood in his room, because having so much of it, so close by, would be too tempting for him in his prior incarnation. And though, the Salvatore’s also kept blood in a cooler in the basement, Caroline probably suspected she’d get “caught” if she drank there . . . 😉 Then again, Caroline TOO is no stranger to Naked Damon. So, perhaps, she was hoping to run into him, as much as Elena was!

      As for Forwood, I think you are right. While the sex may have seemed fast to US, for two horny supernaturals like Caroline and Tyler, it was something that was probably in the back of their minds CONSTANTLY for the entire summer, whether or not they were consciously aware of it. After all, Tyler has loved Caroline since the end of Season 2. And, has spent a good deal of time by her side, ever since then. Plus, alcohol and hormones are two VERY powerful things, when it comes to influencing people to get naked. 😉

      As for Ripper Stefan, I do think you are going to get your wish for a full on Bad Boy, in just a few episodes. 😉

      And regarding Damon, I agree with you, I LOVE the Delena relationship, but I DON’T want it to turn Damon into NON-RIPPER Stefan. I like my Damon to be snarky, brutal and vicious to pretty much everyone except Elena (and maybe Alaric and Caroline). Well . . he could be SNARKY with them all too, I guess. You know what I mean, I hope the writers don’t feel they have to make Damon ALL GOOD, in order to put him with Elena, especially considering that she already likes him just the way he is. 🙂

      Oh, and I’m SO GLAD you noticed my mention of the possibility of Damon becoming a werevamp. I was ABSOLUTELY thinking about yours and my discussion of that point, last season, when I brought it up in this recap. 😉 Good looking out! 🙂

      As for Katherine. Yep . . . back in “As I Lay Dying,” infecting Katherine was the way Klaus illustrated to Stefan that his blood was the cure for Damon’s werewolf bite. There was this great scene in that episode, where Klaus reaches over and bites Katherine’s hand. And Katherine gasps, because she knows that Klaus is already part werewolf. So, she thinks she’s going to start going crazy, and eventually die, like Rose. But then Klaus feeds her his blood, and her wound immediately heals.

      So, yes, both Katherine and Damon have drank Klaus’ blood. 🙂 It remains to be seen whether that will have any affect on them. After all, it has been teased that Katherine will be bringing BIG news, when she returns to the show around episode 4 or 5. Perhaps, her news has something to do with that . . .

  7. Danielle

    I love RIPPAH Stefan! He is so awesome. I read an article that said he will actually start to embrace/enjoy his ripper-ness in EP. 3. Can’t wait

    • Hey Danielle! I read that article about Ripper Stefan too! Very intriguing! (Paul Wesley gives an outstanding interview, doesn’t he? So does Julie Plec.) 🙂

      I just keep trying to figure out what happens to Stefan that makes him consciously throw away his humanity. I can’t help but wonder whether it has something to do with Delena. 😉

  8. imaginarymen

    Julie you have outdone yourself – fresh off a liveblog and you write this incredible recap? BRAVO!!

    ”Where in the World is Stefan Salvatore?” Should TOTALLY be the name of this season ;-00 Also “Truth or Vervain” is CMU!

    You had so many good lines in this. My only episode complaint was MORE KLAUS!! I need more of him smirking in a tight Henley like RIGHT NOW THANKYOUVERYMUCH ;-))

    The role reversal of the Salvatores in this mirroring the pilot episode is brilliant. And you can practically SEE the excitement at being evil shimmering off Paul ;->>

    • Awww, thanks Amy! I figure if vampires can go without sleep, than so can I. 😉 (By the way, I had such an amazing time liveblogging with you guys on Thursday! You and Victi-mom never fail to have me rolling on the floor laughing. I read everything you guys wrote again, after the episode, and it was even funnier the second time around.)

      Yay, you got my Carmen Sandiego reference! 🙂 I honestly didn’t know if anyone was going to pick up on that one. 😉

      You are right, I WAS lacking some quality Klaus screencaps in this recap. (In fact, I may have used the same one twice *blushes*) In my defense, since I’m not talented enough to make high quality gifs just yet (The ones I make on Gifsoup are adequate, at best.), I’m limited to what I find on tumblr at the time I’m preparing my recap. See, Amy? This is why you and I need to get into the Gif-making “business!” 🙂

      So, true about Paul. I don’t know if it’s his recent marriage, or his excitement over the opportunity to FINALLY play EVIL, but he’s quickly becoming my FAVORITE interviewee to watch, with all his self-deprecating, humor, charm, and enthusiasm . . . and this is coming from a STAUNCH Ian Somerhalder lover! 🙂

      • imaginarymen

        Oh no I didn’t mean you needed more Klaus in the recap – I mean the SHOW needed more Klaus – PERIOD! (which I guess, then – yes – you were lacking in them bc they were!)

        My personal opinion is that Klaus has Stefan doing his dirty work bc it’s part of the “deal”, it’s to break Stefan down to his most basest instincts, it’s to keep control of Stefan by having him to such terrible things that not only will he not want to go back – but his loved ones won’t WANT him back, and bc he’s a badass sadistic Mofo!!

        And even though my phone alerted me that Paul was on Fallon last night, I totally spaced and forgot to DVR it :-((

  9. OMG. This is freakin hilarious.

    More, more, and more.

    • Aww, you are so sweet, oxymoron417! I’m so glad you enjoyed the recap! Thanks so much for your kind words. 🙂 (By the way, I’ve lurked on your blog a few times, and it’s AWESOME!)

  10. “Compelled to the End” Andie dies at the hands of “Humans are not Playthings, Damon” Stefan. So sad, so sad. Actually, the worst part of that scene for me was Stefan pushing Damon against the wall so he couldn’t save Andie. At this point, I think that Stefan is putting on the evil act – and yet, Damon’s completely right about him walking a fine line. Stefan frightens and then murders Andie, an innocent human, to save his brother. But I still think Stefan is hoping that he is mostly in control, while lamenting the part of him that isn’t.

    Tyler/Caroline sex FINALLY. I was so pleased to find out the scenes in the previews weren’t just a dream. So sexy. I loved Alaric, except for his beyond lame bailout at the end. Jeremy, not so much, high Matt, yesiree. Damon’s mixture of nonchalance and distress was great. I felt for poor Elena, but she seemed mostly in the background of this episode (about her own birthday) until she spoke with Stefan on the phone. That scene was pretty heartbreaking! Unfortunately, I felt as though I predicted much of what was going to happen here.

    Except, somehow, I was genuinely horrified by the discovery of dead bodies. Blood streaked across the walls, bloody handprints, and two proper looking, propped up bodies that fall apart upon contact. Yikes! The fact that Stefan literally rips them from limb to limb and then puts them back together is truly sickening – almost childlike in its monstrosity, if that makes any sense.

    So glad that I have your recaps to look forward to! I’m heading over to the once livechat now.

    http://thecountchronicles.blogspot.com/

    • Hey Noelle! I’m so thrilled to get to talk TVD with you again, this season. I love your insightful take on things. And you never fail to get me to look at the characters in new and different ways (which, reminds me, I can’t wait to read YOUR recap. I plan to do it, as soon as I get back home. :))

      You know, now that you mention it, in some ways, the fact that Stefan was IN control when he killed Andie, made what he did even more horrifying. Because, as much as Stefan talks about human lives being just as valuable as vampire ones (if not more so, since they are “purer” so to speak), the fact that Stefan consciously decided to kill Andie to save Damon, shows that he doesn’t necessarily believe that deep down. After all, Stefan’s decision to kill Andie was an extremely calculated and conscious one. And he did it in such a way, as to ensure that BOTH Damon and Andie suffered, as a result. Now, of course, Stefan feels that HIS wrath, will ultimately be less painful than Klaus’, for all parties involved, so that it is somewhat of an “ends justify the means”-type situation, but still, as you and Damon said . . . it’s a VERY fine line.

      I also love your description of Stefan’s “signature” kill method of reattaching the bodies, as “childlike in its monstrosity.” So, true! I really felt like I was watching Law and Order:SVU when Damon was describing his brother’s “psychosis.” Though the reattaching of the bodies, stems from Stefan’s guilt, there’s something about the fact that he does that, which is pretty darn crazy, in and of itself . . . something that illustrates that, even after the blood lust has worn off, Stefan still isn’t quite his high-minded and analytical self, when fresh off a kill.

      Since everyone is talking about Stefan’s ultimate TRUE embrace of Ripperdom, it will be interesting to see whether his “signature” kill method changes, after that happens. Will a part of him STILL feel guilty enough, after committing the act of murder, to reattach the bodies, as he has done for over 100 years, or will THAT fall away too?

      Oh, and great point about the Forwood sex NOT being a dream, after all. I’ll be the first to admit that I was skeptical, especially after being fooled by that pesky Not-So-Tomb-Sex scene, last season. Trevino and Accola really do have a fiery sexual chemistry, don’t they? Much more so, than Caroline and Matt, though, as I mentioned, he WAS growing on me, in this episode. 🙂 (I’d just prefer Matt with someone other than Caroline . . . maybe he could be the one to FINALLY loosen up Bonnie! Because if ANYONE needs to do some pot, it’s HER!)

      I’m also with you on Alaric’s bailing on the Gilbert family at the end of the episode, being really lame. I know he’s broken right now, after all that happened to him last season. And the fact that he was hanging out at that keggar was pretty pathetic / ridiculous. So, it’s good that he recognized that. But still, I expected more from him.

      I’m also with you on Elena (despite her having AMAZING sexual chemistry with Damon, as usual) seeming somewhat like a background character, this week. Though she totally has a right to be mopey, given all SHE’S been through, her broodiness frustrated me a bit, in this episode, I must admit. Producer and cast member interviews (along with the “Appetites” promo) have teased a “darker” Elena coming to the forefront this season. I just hope that by “darker” they mean “edgier” and “naughtier,” and not just “sadder and more depressed.” 🙂

  11. Oh my Gosh awesome as usual, I can’t believe it took me all day to get back to read this…….so much going on I guess. Okay maybe it was too much time on facebook plus I finished a Fic LOL> I can’t wait to see what is next this season. Tyler’s mother surprised me but you know I felt she had to know something even though she never let on. I don’t think she has shared it with Caroline’s mother though unless she accidentally found out nosing around Tyler’s room or something. Yeah that is a mystery and I can’t wait for Bonnie to come back I hope Jer tells her what is going before then though. I like you wonder why she had to go SEE her Dad before she could attend Elena’s party. Oh well its hard to learn a lot in forty minutes LOL. OH and the Live Blog was Great as Usual; talk soon hun 🙂

    • Hey there, sassyfran! Yes, as always, I had an AMAZING time liveblogging with you. 🙂 You know, I don’t know if you experienced this as well, but the first few times I liveblogged, I found it really stressful. I was so worried about things going wrong, that I couldn’t just relax and enjoy sharing the episode with friends. But these past few times, I’ve found myself better able to chill out, and just have fun with the liveblog. (You’ve actually helped me out a lot with that. So, thank you! :)) Heck, by the time the Season 3 finale rolls around, we’re going to be old liveblogging pros! 🙂

      You know, now that you mention it, I had read somewhere that both Caroline’s and Tyler’s parents would learn about their warring supernatural natures, and be none-too-pleased about it. Caroline’s mom found out about Caroline in the finale, but I’m not sure when she learned about Tyler. (Would Caroline have told her? Probably not . . .) I was also never sure about Tyler’s parents, and how much they knew. After all, werewolfism was a big part of the Lockwood family history, and they do have that werewolf dungeon / cellar on their property!

      Plus, it was never fully explained whether Tyler’s father had ever triggered the curse. He reacted to that supernatural “weapon” in the finale. But so did Tyler, who hadn’t triggered the curse at that time. So, it was uncertain. Tyler’s dad did seem genuinely confused when he started to have that reaction, but he could have just been acting. But if Tyler’s dad knew about werewolfism running in the Lockwood family, there’s a good chance that Carol Lockwood would have known as well. And if she started to see Tyler and Caroline hanging out all the time, perhaps she put two-and-two together. I suspect we will find out the answer to these questions in next week’s episode. 😉

      Oh, and good call about Bonnie being at her dad’s. I guess I missed that part of the explanation. 🙂 I’m still curious why the writers didn’t have her show up at her best friend’s 18th birthday party, even if only for a little while. Perhaps, they needed to keep her out of the loop, this week, so that Jeremy could bond with Matt? I still thought the whole “phone thing” seemed a little weird. Oh well . . .

      So, I’m assuming you watched Secret Circle too? I can’t wait to hear your thoughts, and read your recap! 🙂

  12. Okayyyy I LOVEDD it. I had missed rolling on the floor laughing while reading the teen wolf re-caps but with TVD back you’ve got that covered!

    So i decided i dont like Bonnie, she’s gets on my nerves, and Jeremy and her just no. Never liked them, its kinda creepy, since elena and her are like sisters, bonnie’s technically dating her sorta brother. Creepy.

    Caroline is a complete b*tch. Could she be any more heartless? i mean im totally pissed off the mom shot her with vervain but she kinda deserved it :p

    And OMGGG delena, Okay is weird i just started liking Stelena?
    Throughout seasons one and two i wanted Delena and now that Stefan’s gone all psycho killer but is still in love with elena i kinda miss them 😦
    And let me just add the fact that you can convey the entire story while adding your own twists 😉 ( if you know what im talking about) is awesome :p
    Thank God TVD is back and my Tumblr is full of all the pretty faces and their snappy one-liners or emotional roller coster ride moments :p

    And keep doing what you do cuz you both are awesome at it 😀
    Talk to you next week, oh and should i add it? should i? is it rude? Okay it would be awesommee if you started re-capping Awkward. Have you heard of it? Its pretty good and its only 20 minutes but i think you’d have fun writing the re-caps. Then again im not sure a lot of people watch it and plus i have no i dea how hard it is to write so many re-caps all the time. Are you the only one? Sorry kinda new here, been two months only :p
    Anyways Cant wait till next week. Eeeeeeeeek!

    • Hey Sumbal! It’s so great to see you. I’m so psyched that Teen Wolf and TVD have some of the same fanbase, because you guys literally made my summer with your brilliance and awesomeness. 🙂 What an amazing fanbase these two shows have!

      I’m with you on Bonnie. I keep WANTING to like her, for Elena’s and Jeremy’s sake (not that either of these FICTIONAL characters give two craps what I think :)), but I just don’t. The judginess, the nosebleeds, the attitude she has toward my Damon, the lack of chemistry with Jeremy . . . it just bugs me. Maybe, if they put her with Matt, and those two were out of the way, I could appreciate them both together. I don’t know. I liked Jeremy with Anna, and even a little bit with Vicki (Heck, back when I thought he might be gay, I even liked Jeremy with TYLER) but just not with Bonnie. *sigh*

      But I do like Caroline. 🙂 Are you more mad at her for sneaking out in the morning, or for keeping Tyler waiting throughout the summer? 😉

      You know it’s funny about the whole Delena and Stelena thing. I’m really glad you brought that up! Based on my recent review of the TVD message boards, you are in very good company. I’ve actually noticed that a lot of people have migrated over to Team Stelena, now that Damon seems to have the upper hand in the competition for Elena’s heart.

      And as staunch a Delena fan as I remain, I think it’s kind of awesome that this show and its characters are complex enough that people have started to “change teams.” That’s what good love triangles are for, after all!

      Because that was the problem with the “love triangle” back in early Season 1, I think. Elena and Stefan were ALWAYS together, and, with the exception of the “Miss Mystic Falls” and “Blood Brothers” episodes, Stefan was ALWAYS “perfect.” I’d actually always felt that more people would become Team Stelena, if the writers just have Damon a CHANCE, and put a little more angst and flaws into the Stelena relationship. Now they have . . . and the camps are more even because of it. Plus, I think Paul Wesley was getting tired of being such a mopey, broody, sort of character, and is really getting a kick out of exploring the different layers of Stefan.

      You and I both like our Bad Boys. So, our attraction to both brothers, respectively, make sense, at this stage in the game. And yet, I’m particularly interested to see if the girls who thought Damon was “SO MEAN,” and Stefan was “SO SWEET” will remain on Team Stelena, now that Stefan is shooting darts at people’s heads, killing Damon’s girlfriends, and playing building blocks with sorority sisters’ heads. 🙂

      And of course, after TWO SEASONS, I’m THRILLED that Damon is going to finally get a genuine turn with Elena’s heart. The fact that their smokin’ together, is one thing. But also — and I say this to my Team Stefan friends all the time — it’s ONLY fair, right? I mean, how does someone look like Ian Somerhalder and NEVER get the girl. 🙂 It just isn’t realistic. 😉

      Speaking of my biases and snarky tendencies . . . 😉 I’m thrilled that you picked them out, and still enjoy the recaps, in spite of them (or because of them ;)). I know there are others who aren’t quite so forgiving of my insane Damon –loving self. 😉

      So, tell me, what’s your tumblr? Is it ejaz? Because, if so, you can bet that I will be “stalking” you, after TVD each week in search of gifs, and fun commentary. 😉

      Oh, and you NEVER have to worry about being rude here. I’m thrilled to chat with people who share my admittedly awesome TV taste. 😉 So, feel free to make requests, and say whatever’s on your mind.

      I actually caught one or two episodes of Awkward, and enjoyed it. As to whether I could recap it, I’ll have to figure out what my “schedule” is like this season. It sounds weird, I know, but these recaps, actually take about 5 hours to write (Can you believe it? I’m just that slow.) Plus, I’m out of the house all day, so, I’m kind of limited, in what I can do. But it’s definitely something I’ll consider. So, thank you for suggesting it!

      I’m sure we will be chatting plenty this season, either way. 😉

      • Heey yeah so i will annoying you and talking to you plenty this season like you said, its nice getting different perspectives from people and i love the re-caps so yeah.

        Hahaha Damon and Stefan *sigh* they drive us fans crazy, im so confused this season and only one episode is out i mean i want Delena but now suddenly out of nowhere i want Stelena back? This is just not fair anymore. Oh and who cares about the Damon loving obsession. by all means go crazy im pretty sure more people are with you. :p In fact i know it.

        Hahaha no Ejaz isnt my Tumblr :p that would be my Last name, i dont actually care about giving that information cause well there are like a hundred of them here. And its probably an odd name since im from Pakistan, yes people over here are even obsessed with all these shows, PPL, TVD, TW, GG etc etc. :p And my tumblr is cottoncandyfusion.tumblr.com. Feel free to check it out all you want.

        And i cant imagine how hard it is to write all these re-caps. And it isnt shocking that it takes so long cuz the re-caps are pretty long so obviously it takes time to think of the witty jokes and how to obsess over damon in different ways. :p

        Once again excited for next week. And can’t wait to see what you make out of the next episode 😀

  13. Oh, show, how I missed you *pets it*

    Fantabulous recap, as always! LOL forever at the Seventh Heaven Guy moniker. Even underneath the facial hair and wolfsbane darts, you could see his wholesome Camden DNA 😉

    Also loved the “all the better to suck your face with Elena” line. Damon was an interesting mix of being his usual outrageously flirtatious self and someone who delicately puts on Elena’s necklace (upon her request) while trying to put the least contact between his fingertips and her skin. Stefan’s sacrifice is not lost on him, so I’m curious to see what causes Delena to give in. What comes first, the chicken or the egg? Delena or full-fledged Ripper Stefan. I wonder if Delena will be a cause or effect of Stefan fully flipping the switch, as I think it is inevitable he will do.

    Stefan earning his Ripper nickname because tears his victims apart and he pieces together the bodies of his murder victims is just creepy on so many levels, I don’t even know where to begin. It is one thing for a vampire to kill through natural bloodlust and in a frenzy, but the premeditation and the sense of art in rearranging bodies has a very Angelus feel to me.
    The Andie death was significant to revealing Stefan’s state of mind I think not so much because she is an innocent (hey, he has torn through entire villages, so that ship has sailed), but because she was murdered in cold blood rather than hot blood. It will be interesting if they explore the different killings styles of new Ripper!Stefan and Damon at his worst, because Damon has always seemed to kill with a vicious hunger, whereas Stefan was completely dispassionate. I’m not sure which is worse.

    Can’t believe Caroline didn’t use her vampire superspeed for her Walk of Shame. I mean, if you are going to leave naked Tyler alone, you may as well take advantage of your mad supe skillz. The lesson of the episode is that if you’ve just had hot sex with your werewolf BFF, you stay with him so his mother won’t suddenly vervain you out of nowhere.

    Caroline wasn’t too discreet about being a vampire. Picking up a guy off the ground by the neck and sing-songing “excuse me”, having monster mash sex with Tyler while the door remains open… Carol might have been clued in by a member of Council or someone who already know Caroline’s identity, but if you are a person on the lookout for vampire activity, Caroline practically had a neon sign flashing above her head screaming “Baby vamp! Baby vamp!”

    My favourite Tyler/Caroline moment was Tyler telling Caroline that “if I shouldn’t be dating, all you gotta do is say something”. I generally just adored the Tyler Calls People Out On Their S**t Show, because he wasn’t being spiteful in his snark, just stating facts and being bluntly honest. He is the type of character who will be great to have around when situations are teetering on the edge of melodrama, because he could puncture this with one well-aimed barb or insight. Funny how Tyler of all people is the most open, direct and honest communicator on the show at the moment. 😉

    I wonder what Klaus’ reason behind creating an army of hybrids is. I guess eternity has the potential to get boring, so have a destructive plan to curb this could be reason enough. I just like a villain with a greater agenda: this is partly what made Katherine so great. I’m hoping we’ll have a power shift dynamic (good knows what plot device would make it happen) where Katherine, when she inevitably returns, can turn the tables on Klaus and be the most powerful, dominant one in that relationship. The image of her stabbing her leg over and over is yet to leave my mind, and I wouldn’t mind seeing Klaus get a taste of his own evil medicine.

    Maybe Klaus is just seeing how far he can push Stefan to the brink and beyond. The bond between the Salvatores, as damaged as the one he shares with Elijah yet still remains to some degree intact no matter what (you never stop caring about family, as Klaus says), surely intrigues him. It will backfire on him, because I think we are going to eventually see just how far Damon would go to save his brother this season. He may initially feel helpless because he has seen Stefan locked in this cycle before, but last time Stefan was bondaged up and tortured by the tomb vamps, Damon went into overprotective brother mode. I’m holding out for an episode where this happens again.

    • LOL about Seventh Heaven Guy, Cherie! I can’t wait until next week, when he’s on all fours, all were-vampy. Despite it all, I still suspect I will have the irresistible urge to shout at the television screen, “Simon! Stop fooling around out there, and go help Ruthie with her homework!” 🙂

      You bring up an AMAZING point about Damon (which reminds me again of the spectacular visual of him delicately putting on Elena’s necklace – SQUEEEE). He is so unusually gentle and careful with her sometimes. In that scene, in particular, you could see how mesmerized he was by her delicate beauty . . . It was almost as if he felt that if he was too heavy with his hands, he would desecrate her in some way. And of course, he doesn’t want to risk offending her, by getting too handsy. I also see your point that there might be a part of him that is refraining on Stefan’s behalf, afraid that if he starts REALLY touching her, he won’t be able to stop . . .

      Since we are on the subject, I had always assumed that Stefan’s seeing Damon and Elena in an intimate moment (It doesn’t even have to be sexual, just one that makes their mutual affection obvious), would be what puts him over the edge. But you bring up a great point about the possibility of it being the other way around. Personally, I would LOVE to see Elena have a particularly venomous encounter with Stefan, one that sends her emotionally wrecked self right into Damon’s arms. Of course, he’ll be gentlemanly, and push her away, not wanting her to offer herself to him out of anger or anguish. But I’d like to think they get some serious necking and fondling in, before that happens ;).

      You also bring up an excellent point about Ripper Stefan. The body reattachment is clearly part of the craziness that stems from his blood lust. No rational individual would think that was NORMAL behavior, even for a cannibal / killer. But what Stefan did with Andie was VERY rational, and calculated to bring about a certain affect. It couldn’t be characterized as temporary insanity, or a crime of passion, at all. And, in some ways, that makes it much worse. It was personal. And I’m not sure whether the fact that he did it to save his brother and girlfriend necessarily eradicates that, at least not completely.

      For Stefan’s humanity’s sake, since he hasn’t gone Full Ripper yet, I’d like to think that his tears weren’t JUST because he missed Elena, but because of his guilt over what he did to his brother, by killing Andie. Perhaps, I’m naïve in thinking that. And, of course, I know things are going to get MUCH darker than that. But at this point in the story, that’s what I choose to believe about Stefan.

      You know, when I was watching Caroline and Tyler getting it on, I was so happy for Caroline that she was able to pull that vamp move on him (not that she was able to control herself, at that point, horny as she was ;)). Because really, that’s the beauty of dating a fellow supernatural. If Caroline was with anyone else, she couldn’t do that, out of fear of scaring her boyfriend off *cough Matt cough*, or making him feel inferior *cough Matt cough*. And if it was someone who didn’t know her true nature, a move like that would put her at risk of him discovering what she was. But Caroline can be herself around Tyler, supernatural “warts” and all. And there’s something freeing and comforting in that. Because no one should have to censor themselves during sex!

      But you make a good point about Caroline not quite having a firm grip on her powers yet, in terms of when to use them, and when not to do so. At the party, she was drunk, and therefore, probably not thinking clearly, about why it’s NOT OK, to just lift people up and move them out of the way in public. Then again, it must be hard for Caroline. Her vampire strength is so intense, that, in day-to-day living she’s probably constantly censoring her movements, to prevent herself from doing things like that.

      I also think, somewhere in Caroline’s head, she worried that using her vampire speed to do the Walk of Shame would be LOUD somehow, and, therefore, would awaken Tyler. You know, she probably watched cartoons as a kid, like most of us. And some subconscious part of her was probably expecting to hear that “speedy sound” the Road Runner makes, or something when she sped off. (I also think TVD uses that whooshing sound, to symbolize vampire speed. So, if she DID do that, WE would have heard it, whether or not Tyler actually did. :))

      And this: “Funny how Tyler of all people is the most open, direct and honest communicator on the show at the moment. ;)” So, true! You know, it was nice to see Tyler hanging out, not just with Caroline, but with Elena. And I hope that his relationship with Caroline (in whatever form that relationship may be ;)) further ingratiates him toward Team Scooby. Because I think Elena and Damon, in particular could use a shot of some of Tyler’s brutal honesty, to help them navigate the rough waters, not only of finding Stefan, but of their own ever-evolving relationship.

      Tyler’s assessment of the affect Elena’s kiss had on Damon was both typical “guy-speak” and oddly insightful. When you spend most of your time getting advice from your girlfriends, as Elena does, it’s sometimes REALLY helpful to have a guy there who’s willing to cut the B.S. and just tell it to you straight. Tyler could be that guy for Elena, for sure . . . but also for Damon, Jeremy, and the rest of the group.

      You have so many great ideas for this show! Your prediction that Klaus will inevitably be brought down by either Katherine or Damon (or both), I think, is right on target. Klaus sure knows how to build eternal enemies. And as powerful as he is, he’s made some SERIOUS ones in Katherine and Damon. Not to mention, the rest of his Original Family, who you know will eventually wake up, and be NONE TOO PLEASED with his manner of temporarily disposing of them. Klaus seems to like to keep individuals as “pets.” And, therefore is intrigued by the notion of someone, like Stefan, viewing a brother, a girlfriend, or another family member, as an equal.

      I really am eager to see some of those Originals flashbacks we’ve been promised, in order to ascertain what the heck MADE Klaus into the megalomaniacal villain he has become. I suspect it had to be something pretty intense. 😉

      I’m so excited to share another TVD season with you. I’m sure we will have many long extended e-mail and blog conversations over the course of the next few weeks. And I, for one, can’t wait!

  14. André

    Well, first respect, it takes skill to write such a long recap (61-pages in A4 format, wow). And as such I would of course take my time to write the comment to make one worthy of your recap. I hope I succeeded in that. Well I could wait no longer to put in my own twopenn’orth.

    And don’t worry Julie; I am a big boy now so I can take other people’s opinions. By the way it’s not as though I hold back with mine. Probably the reason why so many people here post so much is that we don’t hold back. 😉

    I guessed that I wouldn’t be the first to comment and so I am not (albeit I wouldn’t have expected to be the 30th response), but I don’t care and luckily for me a naked Damon doesn’t excite me at all. 😀

    However, the most important thing first:
    For me this episode barely gave me anything, to be honest. I already didn’t read or hear any spoilers except a handful where people’s mouths were faster than mine, but still. Especially with Forwood and Delena there was no big surprise at all, the smaller ones (which mostly affected the other players on the board) made no difference in that regard. Nothing original in my eyes and far too often I knew what would be happening with those four. I like it to know what will happen from time to time but not to such a degree and all at once. Seriously how can it be that I kept away from spoilers and previews and the like and still knew what would be happening?
    To be honest there are currently only three reasons I watched this:
    1) Jeremy’s storyline at least shows some promise
    2) So I could comment on these recaps
    3) The old background freak I am couldn’t resist thinking about this and that, you will see what I mean.

    Yep, may only three reasons, I openly admit that and from what I know I am not alone with that. I am not quitting of course, but I guess my experiences of the episodes are gonna be pretty different from that of the others in this blog.
    So I would say my opinion of this episode is probably the direct opposite of yours in many regards. To make it short it was all in all about as exciting as the coming out of Ricky Martin; which should give everybody a good idea what I am talking about. Basically Delena and Forwood pulled it down, despite the few highlights of the episodes.

    Sorry if I will sound cynical, but the only reason I wasn’t disappointed by this episode was because I didn’t expect much to begin with. 😦

    Ok, to your recap/ episode. Let the games begin.

    You know while reading and writing this your comment about the serial killer and the women’s lingerie made me again think off Klaus and all his necklaces in this episode. Is he not only a hybrid but plans to become a supervillaneous Drag Queen? At least he has the right attitude. 😀
    Might this be Klaus in disguise?

    And I totally agree; the blonde in the start could not have been more obvious a victim if a neon arrow saying “place fangs here” would be pointing at her.
    Now that I think about it, she probably didn’t invite Klaus because she knew about werewolves and as such probably about vampires also, albeit that leaves some other questions. But more on that later in this comment.
    And since I didn’t get it over here, I missed during season 2 the final explanation why vampires prefer to target skinny girls as their victims. Yes the highly scientific and philosophical series “The Simpsons” has provided us with the answer for this millennia old question:

    Now you brought me to something with your remark regarding the compulsion. First, I long thought that this concept would make many things too convenient and easy, and looks like I was right. It makes things far too easy for the characters.
    In addition there is a darker tone to it which as far as I can remember no one ever mentioned. Basically it is imposing your own will on someone else without that person’s consent. This is in essence a violent act and would make sex under compulsion essentially rape. All in all you can therefore say that Damon was actually abusing Andie. And Caroline herself uses violence to get rid of her competition. Not that this surprises me at all with her character, or Damon’s for that regard.
    And I knew the guy was a werewolf the moment Klaus mentioned this “once per month”, at these few minutes into the episode I had already known three things before they actually happened. That sucks. And man that makes me nerdy, I gonna need a lot of workout this week to hammer my nerdstatus down.

    Actually you might not have intended to point it out with your growth joke, but seriously McQueen has put on some muscles since the start of the show. No way can anybody deny any longer that he looks like a man in his twenties and not a teenager. This was apparent at his first appearance in this episode despite lying in bed. Makes you wonder about the producers and writers touch with reality, again.
    Oh, and did you notice that his tattoo could be seen on screen for the first time? 😉

    As for the shopping malls in Mystic Falls: You know this is a teen show and in teen show universe the teens look like adults, two years pass over the course of one (completely with all four seasons two times) and there will always be a big shopping mall even in the middle of nowhere. And of course everything is totally realistic. 😀
    Take Sheriff Forbes for example who suddenly seems to be good at tracking vampires. Seemingly being pretty useless as a town’s protector and shooting an innocent boy seems to have honed her skills.
    Speaking of killing could Andie actually be a Newblood that had survived for more than a few weeks? I mean based on the show she could have managed to stay alive for about 3 months. That is quite a record. So what do you think, will there be any new blood this season that actually survives at least ’til its end? If it happened once, why not happen again.

    And naked Damon; pah, who cares? With or without clothes the guy is uninteresting to me. The only interesting thing about him is that he is actually a killer and seemingly most people forget that on a regular basis. Always forgiving him despite the fact what he did.
    And since we’re at it: what de fuck is a witch therefore if she can’t use a tracking spell? Seriously it’s not really as though Stefan and Klaus were hiding their tracks so I doubt some other witch bewitched the two suckers (pun intended). So why not simply track them per spell? Just use Damon’s blood and get it over with. That is actually another reason for me to keep watching. I want to know whether they come up with a good reason for that, or any reason that is.
    And speaking of her, you have a point, where de fuck is Bonnie? Is she on vacation somewhere else? Because we really never saw her parents, not to mention that they weren’t even worried when Bonnie had disappeared for a while. But then again, if a witch with the powers of a hundred witches is too dumb to simply blast the ubervillains head of, I guess the parents aren’t very smart either.
    However, I really hope you are right about the status of her and Jeremy’s relationship. Let them break up is my opinion.
    And as for Jeremy not telling her, why should he? I know its juvenile but we need some characters in this show who actually somewhat resemble real people. He was just a punching bag in the second half of the last season and he was probably sick of her treating him like he was made out of glass. At least that is an explanation. But this is TVD so an understandable reason might not be the right one.
    And English is not my mother tongue so I am not sure what he said in the stoner den. Did he say “it’s messing with my head” or “she is messing with my head”? Of course the latter option would be way more interesting, I am sure all here would agree on that.
    The thing I am curious about his situation is why he is still shocked to see his dead girlfriends? Shouldn’t he have seen them for about 2 months now?

    And there is your pointless Matt dislike again. Seriously does all this Delena and Forewood stuff screw with people’s heads? If yes, I am glad I’m not infected. Of course he wouldn’t want to be around them. How would you react in such a situation if it looks like the person you broke up with is so shortly afterwards directly into another one? Blondie and wolfboy are dating, Caroline is just –again – not able to realize that. Again no surprise there, not even close.
    And come on, these are Caroline Forbes and Tyler Lockwood. And sorry for my language but I have to say it like it looks from the outside: she is the blondie that basically went from one guy to the next and he is the jock that screwed god knows how many girls even before this. Anybody who knows these two would think that they are dating or at least screwing around. And in case the people here forgot, from the outside it would have looked that way even in early season 2.
    I cut you some slack that you realized that it was obvious that they were dating. However, I totally disagree with you on Tyler’s development. He might not be an all out asshole anymore. Well he never truly was probably, but he didn’t come very far. He is still an immature kid who doesn’t see what is right in front of him; hello, Sophie probably wasn’t blond by accident. Actually that is what he has in common with Caroline. And since when was the one to simply give up what he wanted? I think you see both in a too favorable light.
    Nothing has really changed. All old Caroline, the way she always was. Not knowing what she wants and not realizing what is right in front of her. And same old Tyler, immature, playing the victim when it comes to it and basically falling for anybody as long as they somehow get through his nutshell.
    Not to mention that their relationship is by no way based on themselves. As said it before and say it again, these two were thrown at each other and if they had anything in common needed for a relationship they would have started dating much sooner. They only work on this show because out of some reason I cannot possibly fathom people want and believe that. Apart from that there is nothing about them when it comes to relationships.
    Maybe the Forwood “love”-triangle will be a sort of mirror for the main three. I mean can anybody so far really say that any of the plots of non-Main-Three did not ultimately serve that of our three lamers? Anybody?
    I have no hope for that triangle to really surprise me in the near future or to serve something useful. Well, there is a tiny flicker but not much.
    And yes, for me ripper-Stefan is lame.

    And as for Gallagher, that beard didn’t really suit his face if you ask me; they should have done with a shorter one. And that the guy is a werewolf was also no surprise either. Seriously what is wrong with the writers? And why the fuck is it so difficult to find some werewolves? Did Klaus doesn’t have any spare witches anymore? They can draw powers from the full moon so why not use it to find a werewolf?
    Maybe Ray will be a Newblood that will survive for some time. If the next episode is really called hybrid we will at least see him again I guess. But I stay with my announcement; I will not watch the Promo unless someone asks me for help in that regard.

    And before I continue, what guy from Teen Wolf was on Seventh Heaven?

    As for Stefan and Klaus: That Stefan was the enforcer here was pretty obvious, but Klaus was again just this shallow and weird ubervamp who is now out for, well, probably world domination. But again that he would be out there to create his own “species” is not surprising at all, I fully expected that. Not to mention that Klaus seems to basically search for weres on his own. Wasn’t he supposed to be some vampire uberlord? Shouldn’t he have dozens of underlings to do the dirty work? And if Elijah was right, why was that guy paranoid anyway? And I was close to groaning in annoyance at his “I’m a different kind of monster talk.” I only say, don’t talk, do, asshole.
    Really the pieces of spoiler I knew of before the season started I can count on one hand. I willingly kept away from it to cool down and not know what would be happening, but still I knew what would happen in this episode before it even happened. And that was so lame for me that I start to think the only reason I didn’t get bored at this scene in the bar and the following ones with these three was because I was busy doing good screencaps for Julie.
    The only thing a bit unexpected was that Klaus seems to need werewolves for creating hybrids. No idea why. But then again I pretty quickly thought that this is just another example of a half-cooked idea of the writers. Like the real curse of season 2. But hey around episode 14 of this season something will probably happen to turn this around again. Maybe it was all a lie, again?
    As for Stefan not being able to compel the werewolf, it was stated in season 1 that witches cannot be compelled and if I remember correctly Damon stated to Mason that werewolves cannot be compelled while he was torturing him. Albeit I think he said it in the way that Mason was a supe and therefore cannot be compelled, not specifically because he was a werewolf. Which makes it kinda weird that an Original is supposedly only able to compel other vampires.
    As for the two girls again, it makes sense to have humans as guardians. I don’t know if vampires can enter a werewolf home without being invited but they cannot enter a human one, which would give the werewolves some measure of protection. Of course only some as you pointed out. In addition a human could be ready to do whatever it takes to kill the werewolf if necessary and they could keep looking for danger on the night of the full moon. However if they were supposed to be guardians of some sort it makes you wonder why they had no vervain, I mean it’s not a rare plant to get, there are 250 species of vervain and the Common Vervain of Europe was introduced into the USA long ago. But maybe the writers are unaware of such details that would flesh out their show.
    Furthermore these two women could be kin you know, being related to that Ray guy or they could be pre-triggered werewolves. I made something like that up for a fanfiction author. In that society of TVD werewolves the women are actively hindered from triggering the curse (or rather awakening the blood as they called it), because due to the immense physical and mental stress of the transformation they would never be able to have children because it would cause abortions. Maybe the writers thought in that direction. It could be an explanation for the werewolves in this show. Well at least it would be a better one than the old fact that the average werewolf is considered male (unless they are main characters) because wolves and especially werewolves are attributed to masculinity. Well I get that in the case of these giant muscled wolf-men but an actual wolf is to be honest quite the opposite in terms of physics, since they are very slender on average and therefore the opposite of the human ideal of masculinity.
    And since I mention the transformation, is it just me or do you also think that they will play that part of the werewolves’ condition down? I mean think about it, having that sort of pain every month must be terrible and take its toll, but seemingly these werewolves have no problem with it. I rarely hate things but this constant telling it but not showing it or rather showing the opposite tends to really get on my nerves.

    And you missed something again. It wasn’t Truth and Vervain, it was Truth and Wolfsbane. 😉

    And since we are at torturing, anybody wonder where Katherine went?
    And shouldn’t there be some consequences for Tyler missing for 1 month? Or maybe Caroline being shot was the consequences.
    Then again he and Jeremy never even got detention, so….

    I doubt that Damon and Katherine can be hybrids, snapping necks wouldn’t kill them, of course so far we don’t know what would kill a hybrid so…
    However I think it’s most likely that Klaus targets werewolves might mean that only werewolves can be turned, because if not, what reason would there be to search for them? He could choose from millions of humans, so why choose werewolves?
    Let’s all hope that it stays that way and the writers don’t come with a ridiculous “explanation” again. Currently the “only werewolves” rule would be the best option in my eyes because it gives the werewolves an actual role here and limits Klaus’s potential for recruits because there are a) not many around and b) he would only be able to let his followers grow slowly because new werewolves would have to be sired (at least I hope they stay with that, let’s face it the bite story is pretty overused). Of course whether Klaus is smart enough to think that far ahead is another thing. Based on Elijah and Klaus I think the only reason these Originals are still alive is because no one ever really tried to kill them. And who else thinks that it was a stupid concept to have only one dagger capable of killing an Original? Seriously, what good does it to have a dagger that only kills one person and only as long as it is still in the victim’s body. If you can create one; why not at least a second one?
    Then again there could be another explanation why Klaus targets werewolves. Based on the fact that he chooses Stefan as an underling might mean that he looks for natural killers. And when you think about the way werewolves come to be it might be possible that you may find a suitable candidate among them much faster. I mean every werewolf has blood on his/her hands and it is naïve to assume that it was all accidents and self-defense. At least some of them obviously must have done it willingly. If the male Lockwoods are an example probably every pre-triggered werewolf has anger management issues. That would be one attempt on a different explanation, albeit I admit not a good one since human prisons would be full of plenty of killers and even if you don’t go into a prison, Klaus would surely find suitable candidates among various criminal organizations.
    One thing I hope will not happen: the werewolves are suddenly not close to extinction. I mean it was stated time and again in season 2 by various characters and the facts presented by various in-show sources confirmed that. So now to just kinda do like ‘ups there are hundreds of werewolves in the USA’ would really be lame and cheap. If writers cannot work with that they themselves created they should be fired and be ashamed of calling themselves writers.
    You know when I heard their talk about pack; I was thinking “the only thing missing is the Alpha-Omega crap”. I hope not, really not, that is just as overused as the bite stuff.
    That sort of stuff makes me think that if a werewolf would come along that is actually a wolf changing into a human many of the werewolves on today television would be in for a pretty big shock. 😀

    And as for Tennessee, well it is a neighboring state, so maybe it wouldn’t take that long to drive there. And don’t forget, the laws of time and space don’t seem to apply in Mystic Falls. 😉
    This makes we wonder whether summer will be over before the season ends. What do you think?

    And I personally wouldn’t call Stefan’s behavior dull, rather psychotic. Maybe in this case he somehow wanted to leave a clue, because if he would feel guilty in a normal way he would at least bury the victims. Of course, maybe I didn’t get your humor here, again. :/
    Anyway, I say with this Stefan Salvatore has made it on my “stay the hell away from” – list of TV characters. He is still lame though.
    And Isobel was probably right with her statement regarding the Salvatores.

    And I think Tyler was rather talking about himself than Damon. And Elena is simply hiding (how surprising) from her feelings. Dull I say, totally dull. That they come up with that time and again over two seasons in this show makes me wonder sometimes whether the target group of this show is 12 to 15 year olds and not women between 18 and 36, at least that was what I was told the target group was.
    As for Elena, you don’t really expect normal behavior from her anymore do you? At least I gave up on that months ago. 😀
    But maybe we should psychoanalyze her. What do you think? Worth a try? 😉

    In my eyes slutty Sophie was an analogy for Caroline. Come on does anybody think it was coincidence that she was blond?
    Speaking of coincidence, isn’t it just convenient, that werewolves also have heightened emotions? I hope you are right that it is truly Tyler’s raging hormones because this stuff is so crap. It really wouldn’t be the first time the writers come up with silly concepts out of blue. What’s next? Werewolves are all of a sudden immortal? *rolleyes*
    Think about it, we had plenty of werewolves but not even a hint of this condition. And the heightened emotions of the vampires only come into play when it suits the writers, most of the time they are interestingly absent. So obviously they are just a convenient tool to get things going when they have no idea to get it done the normal way or to let it seem special. Kinda cheap if you ask me.
    It’s the same with Delena. So Damon gets all sensitive all of a sudden? Wrong, he was totally emotional before as well, the only difference is that Stefan is not around anymore to stake his claim. That is basically everything there is and nothing more in my eyes. The whole necklace and all thing was in my eyes not different than the dance in season 1 or all the other stuff that he had done for and to her. But maybe you are right and my judgement is clouded by the predictability of it all. I actually hope that you are right on this.
    And man is he dumb. This sort of stupidity was funny the first few times but this is the third season and it’s getting old. Don’t these idiots learn anything? Elena goes in and out of the villa time and again and Damon knew of the party, why did that moron not close the door? This sort of stupidity seems to be common trait of the TVD vampires. Kinda makes you wonder how they actually survive the centuries, I won’t say millennia since we so far don’t know how long they have existed.

    The whole Elena situation was so dull in my eyes I didn’t even bother to wonder why Bonnie wasn’t there at the party. Next.
    The only thing I noticed about the party is the number of (supposedly) teenagers, albeit it was nice that the characters at least interacted a bit with those outside of the circle again. And isn’t Mystic Falls some little town? Where do they get these many people to fill the Salavatore residence? Not to mention that all of them are in the right age, so they must come from out of town. And I didn’t see a difference in the behavior of the supes, same old, same old.

    And Andie’s death: again, I knew what would be happening before it was happening. Only a slight hope was there that it wouldn’t be Stefan who came out of the light, but again I just had to be proven right. And no surprise after that, not even at the end of the episode with Stefan’s phone call. Is it any wonder that I didn’t enjoy the episode?
    No point lingering on that. Next.

    In what way was Matt trying to flirt with Caroline? I would say he was pissed at her practically jumping from one guy to the next, as much as you can be while being stoned. Even if he dumped her there is no reason just to get to another guy that quickly. Of course if he was pissed about that, he didn’t knew Caroline very well since it was clear that she would do that. If you ask me that scene was only there to get boring Forewood in the spot light by letting an outside force throw Caroline and Tyler at each other, again. Nothing more to it except Caroline overanalyzing everything again and blaming everything important on somebody else as she usually does. One thing was there also I think, the whole werewolves vs. vampires crap, probably to “proof” that it can work nonetheless. Yeah maybe it would be believable if these two wouldn’t have known each other for years without any sort of sexual attraction and were actually formed by the societies of werewolves and vampires. And nobody should say that they were when they were not. Tyler has been a werewolf for three months and Caroline a vampire for not even half a year and neither had much contact outside their usual peers so these two clearly don’t count as any sort of Romeo and Juliet as so many fans sometimes seem to love to compare them to. I wonder if such people ever read Romeo and Juliet, Tyler and Caroline have next to nothing in common with them except for accidentally belonging to two conflicting factions and that there story is romanticized when it really isn’t romantic. And yes I just outed myself as someone who thinks that Romeo & Juliet is mostly tragic and not romantic.
    I like to think that the writers let Matt say what he did in that scene to have a character with real-life reactions to a situation but seemingly that is not the case, at least my hopes aren’t high. And since we’re at it, Caroline has by no way a reason to be upset about Matt talking about vampires and werewolves when he is stoned (and nobody listening) when she, totally clean, lifts a guy with one arm in front of everybody. Bad Caroline, that is hypocritical.
    Oh and Tyler and Caroline have sex. Buuuhhhh
    I know for a fact that I am not the only one who thinks that this was unromantic and unsexy. It was predictable, everything about it actually, and just boring. No reason to linger on that. Maybe it would work better if these two would be a couple due to themselves.

    Furthermore I think you wouldn’t have despised Matt at all had you not fallen in the Forewood trap. There was nothing to hate about him when you are not a Forewooder. Actually in my opinion he grasps the situation better and quicker than the rest of them. He openly says that it is bad and doesn’t hide behind smiles or tries to act normal (considered the nature of this show his few lines in the episode say much). Seriously how many of them actually had the honesty to admit that their lives are totally messed up? So far I can only count him and Jeremy. If there were more, fell free to correct me, sometimes I love to be wrong.
    But I agree that the reefer and the alcohol were, again, long overdue. The series was actually lacking some real-life reactions to the whole craziness of the situation. So while especially Jeremy’s fall back to drugs was long overdue as well I will be content that it finally happened, albeit a bit weird that only seeing two dead girls brought him back to that instead of … well, the death of four people he actually knew and at least three of them were close to him.
    And the show needs some comic relief. Broody Stefan all the time was getting boring. I hope the writers stay with that and introduce some humor as a reaction to the whole situation.
    And no, you would chalk seeing dead people up to loneliness and bad weed if you are lonely and smoked bad weed. Matt doesn’t know that ghosts exist; at least there is no evidence for it.
    And I admit I was a bit disappointed about that part of your recap, normally you can small unwanted homoeroticism ten miles against the wind. But this time you missed it? Please tell me you were just overworked from your enormous recap. 😦
    And Jeremy’s art skills were one of the few positive moments in this episode; the writers tend to forget the everyday aspects of the characters lives and focus entirely on all this danger and supernatural stuff.

    Now to my second favorite part of the episode, my favorite was of course Matt and Jeremy’s interaction, Mrs. Lockwood shooting Caroline.

    Finally the humans get some Showtime again. Albeit when a friend spilled the beans and told me about it before I saw it, I was hoping Mrs. Lockwood would shoot Caroline with a shot gun. Ever since the first season we didn’t had any non-supe human who was actually good for something when battling supes (except maybe for Matt killing that witch, ups I mean warlock of course 😉 ). And smarts were also missing dramatically. I mean seriously, I get why the old perfume trick wouldn’t work today due to the market but would it have been so difficult to simply “poison” the water supply, or lace the glasses in the Grill with vervain? They could have put it in the drinks as well. So even if the vampire wouldn’t have been in the Grill, many people would have had vervain in their system and the vampire would have been forced out in the open. And what was that with the vervain anyway? Why wait for Zack (or what’s his name) to provide vervain? Like I said there are about 250 species of Vervain and even Common Vervain from Europe is neither unknown in the USA nor hard to get, they could have imported vervain or simply make a greenhouse to plant new plants. Or trying to get it to grow in town, it looks pretty enough to pass for decoration. Really, so far it seems as though you get dumber on this show once you pass thirty in one way or another.
    Is it so difficult for the writers to come up with such ideas? They make all sorts of crazy stuff up so why not that? I tend to think the only Original thing since the start of season 2 was the word “Original”.

    And by the way, we could consider ourselves lucky if Mrs. Lockwood would be Darth Vader because then we could see stuff like that:

    I am sure we would all have liked to see Bonnie use her powers in a way like that. Or that:

    Ok, now Alaric. I agree it was lame, but maybe it wouldn’t if we would have been shown the reason instead of just being told like always on this show. Seriously the writers should take their heads out of their asses and focus less on the main three. I mean what is there really exciting about these three left? And I don’t just say it now, I said that for months. As for his hair: maybe he is channeling Elijah’s spirit somehow? And what was it with those clothes he wore in Tennessee?
    I hope that vanishes very soon.
    And Elena as a role model? I would say no way. That girl has neither actually worked on her material nor emotional life (the whole two vampire brothers and she doesn’t want to be one thing). Basically she is running from her problems instead of confronting them. So all in all typical teenager, so no, definitely not a role model.

    So all in all, this episode was very far from satisfying, it had enough to keep my interest (when combined with your recaps) but not enough to satisfy me even a bit.

    • Oooh, so much to cover, Andre! 🙂 Where do I begin? Oh, I know! I’ll begin with your question about which Teen Wolf Character got his start on Seventh Heaven? But why tell you, when I can SHOW YOU . . . (You are just going to love this. If you think puberty was kind to Steven R. McQueen, you haven’t seen anything yet . . .) 🙂

      (By the way, Martha Plimpton — though I think her character is SUPPOSED to be in her early twenties — looks old enough to be “Martin’s” mom, in these clips, which is part of what makes them so unintentionally hilarious. And that MOM hair she’s sporting! GEEZ!)

      LOL at the Simpsons clip. Yes, drinking blood full of cholesterol can’t be good for preserving those flawless vampire good looks, among other things. (Can vampires suffer from heart attacks?) But I have to say, I didn’t find RAG#1 and RAG#2 to be overly skinny. Ridiculously attractive . . . yes . . . overly skinny . . . no. 🙂

      And I must say, as a lover of all things compulsion, I too was annoyed by SOME of its usage in this episode. In short, I like when writers come up with creative, intriguing, and frightening uses of compulsion. Examples of this would include Stefan’s compulsion of Andie in this episode, and Damon’s compelling Vicki to believe that STEFAN had been torturing her, instead of Damon, in the early Season 1 episodes. I also find some uses of compulsion to be sexy, like Katherine’s compulsion on Stefan in some of the 1864 flashbacks.

      But I thought the compulsion at the beginning of the episode was a bit of a cop out, because it COMPLETELY invalidates the “Rule” about vampires having to be invited into a home. Why not just use compulsion ALL the time, to gain access to homes, then?

      I also, though, intrigued, was a bit frustrated by the haphazard explanation to Seventh Heaven Guy that Stefan had “compelled the whole bar” not to help him, while he was being tortured. How did he do that? Did he have to go up to EVERY SINGLE PERSON in the bar individually? Or did Stefan suddenly become the Super Man of Compulsion this summer? Either way, wouldn’t Seventh Heaven Guy have noticed this was happening?

      Also, even if Stefan DID compel everyone in the bar, what about new people who walked in? Did they bar the doors to prevent that from happening? Because if I walked into a bar, and saw someone getting darted in the brain, I would like to think I would call the cops . . . I don’t know. . . .

      I understand why they had to make SOME explanation for what was going on. But I honestly think it would have been more effective, if we saw Stefan compelling everyone to LEAVE the bar, while Seventh Heaven Guy was in the bathroom. Because THAT would have been truly creepy. Imagine the guy coming out of the john, to find the once full bar now completely empty, save Stefan and Klaus, and all the doors locked.

      I DO think its kind of funny that Vampire Hater Lizard Forbes is now helping Elena FIND a vampire, so that she can bring him BACK to town. (How would the Anti-Vampire Council react if they knew?) I guess her guilt over killing Elena’s brother runs VERY deep. 😉

      You bring up a good point though, Lizard Forbes has seemingly gone from Keystone Cop to Vampire Tracker Extraordinaire in just one summer. I guess all that energy she used up last season plotting ways to kill her own daughter has now been put to more productive use. 😉

      As for Jeremy, I don’t know if he’s as shocked over seeing his girlfriends, as he is startled (They always manage to catch him at moments he’s least expecting them), and slightly annoyed. (Though I do hope the writers recognize the inherent comedy in this, and start playing up Jeremy’s frustration. I could picture him saying something like, “Come on! The first five times, it was kind of hot, your popping up and staring at me like that. Now, it’s just creepy. GO AWAY!”)

      And, hey! I was NICE about Matt in my recap, this week! *pouts* I said he’s less annoying when he’s high . . . funny even! And I did slightly enjoy his bromance with Jeremy. (Yes, it was homoerotic, but not NEARLY as homoerotic as all those naked almost kiss scenes in Teen Wolf, between Derek Hale and like EVERY OTHER MALE CHARACTER on the show . . . nor the SEDUCTIVE WHISPERS of Klaus in Stefan’s ear. In comparison with all those guys, these two were more teenybopper puppy love crushing than full-fledged male love humping.)

      Perhaps, it’s because I don’t find Matt particularly sexy . . . He’s cute, but not sexy. Now, Jeremy and TYLER, on the other hand . . . that’s a bromance I could SHIP, BIG TIME. 😉

      And yes, Matt was TOTALLY flirting with Caroline, by kissing Elena in front of her to try to make her jealous, and by FINALLY talking to her (after he had given her the silent treatment all summer) right when she was ogling Tyler and Slutty Sophie. I just think these two characters bring out the worst in one another. Even before Caroline turned vamp, Matt was kind of judgmental of her. So, quick to lecture her, and toss her aside, when she behaved jealously or erratically.

      This is not to say that Matt can’t be a good boyfriend to someone else . . . He was just a TERRIBLE boyfriend to Caroline. And the way he acted around her made me dislike him as a character. Hopefully, my opinion of him will change, this season, since his storyline will have him interacting mainly with Jeremy. After all, those two seem to have a much better repoire with one another, than either Jeremy and Bonnie or Matt and Caroline.

      And yeah, I was kidding about Stefan’s reattachment of bodies being a Psycho Killer FAIL. The humor was supposed to come from my OWN blase attitude toward the horrific dismemberment of bodies, as a recapper :), along with the fact that I would be more impressed and amused if Stefan played Mr. Potato Head with the girls, and switched their heads around. (Because, of course, references to Mr. Potato Head are always VERY funny! ;)) I’m going to use your favorite video here, by way of explanation 🙂

      As for the characters recognizing how crazy their lives, are, I actually think we saw that A LOT in this episode. Jeremy’s and Matt’s conversation was one example. Alaric’s discussion of how he’s THE WORST CHAPERONE EVER, along with his explanation as to why he sleeps on the couch, because he feels funny sleeping on all those dead people’s beds, was another. Even Elena’s obvious depression, and lack of desire to celebrate her own birthday, was evidence that these individuals recognize that their lives aren’t akin to those of regular teenagers anymore. That being said, I appreciated that they all at least TRIED to be normal this week, by attending, what was, for the most part, a typical teenage keggar . . . It just so happened to be held at a 170-year old vampire’s house . . .

      Oh, and I LOVE your recognition of how much Slutty Sophie looked like Caroline. I honestly didn’t catch that at all. But that’s also a typical male response to rejection. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen my guy friends cope with breakups, by dating girls who look scarily similar to their exes. Perhaps, Tyler just has a type of girl to whom he’s attracted . . . Or maybe he just really wanted to get laid, and knew Sophie was slutty, much like the two girls he tried to hook up with last season . . . (neither of whom looked much like Caroline). Either way, I do think a part of him got off on fondling a Poor Man’s Caroline. And then, LOOK! He eventually got to fondle the real thing! YAY TYLER! 🙂

      (And I’m actually NOT being sarcastic here. Though it probably sounds like I am. ;))

      This certainly wasn’t my favorite TVD premiere episode. I think the Season 2 premiere was stronger, in terms of emotional impact, and shocking twists. That being said, I do still have high hopes for this season. But then again, maybe you could chalk that up to me being such a hardcore Delena fan . . . 🙂

      Oh, and can I just say, I’m more than a little honored that my little recaps, play even the teensy tiniest role in your decision to continue watching this show. *blushes, and grins like an idiot*

      • André

        Wow, so it was Hoechlin who was on Seventh Heaven, maybe that was why his face seemed so familiar, I thought of some movie I once saw and thought that he was the child actor. Then again, maybe I really did confuse the two, since I never saw that much of Seventh Heaven.

        Ok; maybe the RAGs weren’t overtly skinny but you have to admit they fit the typical vampire victim profile. Like I said more obvious than a neon sign, and even more ridiculous, especially when they are clothed in expensive dresses no everyday woman could afford to wear randomly (ok, not these two but I guess you know what I mean).
        And I guess if vampires would only be feeding on fat people they would probably end up like this:

        Still, shouldn’t muscular jocks without doping be their favored prey then? Well I guess we shouldn’t expect too much. I mean, think about it, the everyday vampire in TV and Cinema has such long and often thick fangs that if they actually target a vein, they would pierce right through it and actually cut it in pieces, probably causing intense internal bleeding. And not only would the victim almost surely die, a lot of the blood would go into the victim’s body and the vampire would barely get anything or would have to bite the body several times to get enough blood.

        You have a valid point with the compulsion and invitation topic. Furthermore, why can a human not revoke the invitation? Like I said half-cooked and they give the supes too much power, the way they are doing it now, really makes you wonder how on earth in these shows vampires ever became a myth. It might be possible with the werewolves once strong enough chains could be made. Albeit to be honest, I know a bit of actual werewolf-folklore and the vast majority of the tales about them, even if you only count Europe, could never ever have been attributed to these TVD werewolves. Let’s say it this way: if you think the True Blood werewolves shift fast, you have no idea. Neither could a being that needs seemingly hours to transform be responsible for tales of people transforming over the matter of seconds and in broad daylight. 🙂
        And yes the mass-compulsion in the bar was really weird, because that should have been pretty obvious. I mean a total stranger shows up and just talks to everyone? I can’t really think of an explanation that would have actually worked, not in a bar like that at least. As for the Ray guy, I think he had just entered the bar in the episode and Klaus and Stefan were already there. Albeit for that they must have found out that he would be there regularly, either by asking around or observation and in the latter case the whole scene would be pretty pointless.
        And you are right; the torture would have to be going on for hours I guess, so there is the question on new people walking in. Sure what you said would be an explanation; the question is just whether the writers actually think that way. I mean it really isn’t the first time that when you think about this and that and it reveals itself to be quite shallow and not thought through.
        Your idea about the sudden empty bar would have been much better if you ask me, I mean every viewer probably knew that the guy was in trouble anyway so why not. Maybe you should be a writer for the show.;)

        While your explanation regarding the sheriff is very funny and probably more satisfying for us viewers, I guess we both know that it was probably another example of something in the show “doing the Damon crow”. And since we’re at it, don’t you think that Jeremy is still a bit too cool and stoical about his second death? Sure he had died before, but he got shot straight in the chest and do you really just walk away from something like that?
        And I wonder whether he has already figured out that his ring might not be working on him anymore.

        And speaking of Jeremy, you know what would be funny? If Vicky and Anna sitting on Jeremy’s bed and measure his morning wood. 😀
        But yeah, he really needs to yell at them, I mean if he is already stoning himself again (well considered the state of people in the show that is) it must really bother him.

        And pouting only works with straight guys, just like tears. We non-straights are immune to that. 😉
        And you would not just ship a Jyler Bromance, you would drool over it I am sure, especially now that Jeremy is allowed to show more body, good for us that the Grill shirts are so tight right? 😛

        I think you totally misinterpret the scenes with Matt and Caroline due to being in the Forwood trap (no idea how anybody could fall into that one). Anyway, there was no hint that Matt wanted to make Caroline jealous in the scene with the kiss. He was rather trying to avoid her and I guess the next scene was laced with a slight hint of sympathy as well as sarcasm ala “now you know how that feels like Caroline.” Again you see Caroline and Tyler in a too favorable light. His reaction and behavior towards Caroline was neither abusive nor in any way not normal. There is something to the statement, because so far I have not found a single fan who thinks the way about Matt and Caroline the way you do who is not a Forewooder and I doubt that this is a coincidence. Really, I think you hated him because he a) didn’t just accept Caroline inacceptable behavior and b) stands in the way of Forewood. I said it once and say it again, had he just accepted Caroline (that would be like in that Men-and-Women-are-from-different-planets-book) with everything like some people demand, she would never have gotten herself more under control, no matter how little it was in the end. Really, think about it how Caroline’s behavior looks from the outside and lock the Forewooder in you away while you do it.

        Ok, looks like I didn’t get your humor with the body-scene. Interesting that you remembered that video. 😉
        By the way, did I introduce you to this video?

        Ok, Alaric, you have a point there, I didn’t really analyze him. And there is something to Elena, yes. But nonetheless, their reactions are not really in line with their experiences. Maybe that will change over time in the show. Maybe you are right and Elena will show signs of actual depression. It would at least be another nail in the coffin for all this sugar-coating if you ask me.
        But you know it really makes me wish to have a character that doesn’t in some way love or even like Elena and would tell our Scooby Gang exactly what he/she (or both 😉 ) thinks about them. Man that would be awesome I think.
        By the way is True Blood still the “everyone-loves-Sookie” show?

        And isn’t the Salvatore mansion older than a 170 years?

        Ooohhhhh, man I am stupid, I wanted to say that in my first comment:
        The witches seem really dumb in this show. I mean how on Earth did the settlers of Mystic Falls manage to kill so many witches? To say it with another Simpsons sentence: “Why don’t they use their powers to flee?”
        Seriously, they can do all sorts of stuff but dozens of witches don’t manage to flee? Maybe witches have a weak survival instinct.

        I guess your hopes probably are due to being a Delena fan. 😉

        Damn I hope I didn’t forget anything again. :/

      • You might have recognized Hoechlin as the child actor in the film, Road to Perdition . . .

        http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0257044/

        I guess, technically, I misspoke, when I said he “got his start” on Seventh Heaven. *blushes again*

        Man, I don’t know what I would do without YouTube, wikipedia, and imdb in my life! 🙂

  15. Ali

    OmG… So much to talk about. First of all I have come to the conclusion that it is MANDATORY for me to download the first 2 seasons of this show…. If I thought Werebangers were such a talkers while reading TW comments, now Fangbangers sure showed me… Man, there´s a lot to digest, but as Jules gently pointed out to me last week: with this soo goodlooking cast, sex, blood, and great friends to comment about it, who can be able to resist?

    I must simply said this premiere lacked of:… not a thing! it was really enjoyable…. just can´t wait to next week (but in the meantime I´ll start downloading, for sure)

    • YAY ALI! *jumps up and down, and squeals like a total girl*

      Welcome to the CULT! 🙂 I KNEW you’d like this show! And I can’t wait to hear your thoughts on it, after you’ve watched a few of the earlier episodes! (If I recall correctly, I started recapping TVD around the middle of Season 1. I think my first recap was for the “Children of the Damned” episode? So, if you happen to be in the market for some “extra credit reading material . . . you know where to find me. ;)”)

      A word of warning. The first three episodes of TVD are a bit sloooooowww, and don’t reflect the SPECTACULAR caliber of the show, at its best. So, if you happen to be unimpressed by episodes 1, 2, or 3, all I can say is DON’T GIVE UP! It gets better . . . MUCH BETTER ;).

      You’ve made my day, Ali! Happy fangbanging! 😉

  16. Gen

    *Throws confetti in the air* IT’S ALL TC/TC-SEX AND NOTHING HURTS!

    I don’t have time to go in to an in depth fangirl ramble, I’m saving that for tomorrow when I’m home, but I’ll come back and flail.

    So very happy that I can once again come by here during work and be fully entertained by your recaps sweetie. They never cease to make me laugh and nod vigourously at points you make. *Applauds*

    • Awww, thanks Gen! I’m so thrilled to have been reunited with my TVD – loving family (particularly those members of the family, who share my SHIPS *cough Delena and Forwood cough*)! It really is like coming home again!

      Speaking of SHIPS, this DEFINITELY seems like it’s going to be OUR season. And can I say, IT’S ABOUT TIME! 🙂 I have NO doubt that we will all have plenty to squeal about, exclaim over, and analyze to death, in the coming weeks. It’s going to be awesome!

      (Now, if we could only get HBO to syndicate TVD, so that our inevitable Forwood and Delena sex scenes can be even LONGER and RAUNCHIER, in the future. Seriously, what’s this I hear about people bitching about Forwood sex carrying on TOO long? What right-minded girl complains about a boy with STAMINA! It’s so rare, after all. ;))

      • Gen

        People have been sneaking into Jeremy’s weed stash because they are clearly high. Sex scenes too long? What is this fuckery? These people need to simmer down and check themselves.

        I thought that most of the TC scenes were a bit rushed, but I understand that the writers want to get the R&J storyline underway as quickly as possible. I have to remind myself that my OTP are secondary characters and that their story isn’t going to get a lot of air time and just be happy with what I get lol.

        So again I applaud this recap and I look forward to the next one! Gah, thank God the horrendous hellatus is finally over. I almost didn’t make it lol.

  17. Amelia

    Hi! I was part of the livechat for the season premiere, and I just wanted to tell you that this is a brilliant recap! A part of me is bitter that we didn’t get a chance to see Tyler/Caroline getting closer over the summer to the point where Caroline feels comfortable gossiping about her best friend lol! I just love how interested Tyler seems to be about Delena, it really cracks me up.

    The sexual tension in the Delena necklace scene was palpable; I was really expecting them to kiss even though I knew it wouldn’t happen. LOL!

    Also, a lot of people are saying that the Forwood sex is rushed, but I disagree. They’ve been communicating on a regular basis since the ending of 2×07, she was with him through his first transformation, they kissed in 2×12, he told Matt that he “kind of fell for her; I don’t see how anyone wouldn’t because she’s pretty incredible.” Plus in 2×21 they were naked! cuddling on the couch after his second transformation.. so I wouldn’t say that it is rushed or strange at all. Granted, I am a huge Forwood fan so I’m pretty biased!

    On an unrelated note, are you watching GG season 5? Needless to say, I’m only watching in hopes for a Chuck/Blair reunion- hopefully it happens before the season finale! Whenever they’re apart, I find that I am extremely emotionally unstable.

    • Hey Amelia! Thanks SO much for liveblogging with us, last week! I had SO much fun fangirling with you. We all DID! Aside from being awesome company, your insights and comments were brilliant, witty, and often outright hilarious. So, thank you for making our liveblog such a great read! You really are a natural liveblogger, if that makes any sense. 🙂

      I really do hope we get some Forwood summer flashbacks this season. I mean, really, how cruel of the writers, to give us a fun little tidbit of info, like the fact that Tyler and Caroline have been INSEPARABLE all summer, and NOT give us a little taste of what that actually means.

      I, for one, would have LOVED to be a fly on the wall when Tyler and Caroline had their epic DELENA conversation. I can just picture Tyler giving his trademark smirk, as he asked typical guy questions, like, “Are you sure they just kissed . . . or did they . . like hookup? I mean, they were in the same bed together right?” AND “Isn’t Damon Salvatore like 170 years old? Is that even legal?” Then Tyler would have probably said something like, “You can’t really blame him though . . . Elena’s HOT.” At which point, Caroline would have punched him REALLY REALLY hard in the arm. 😉

      And I’m with you, Tyler’s and Caroline’s SUPER SCREW didn’t seem rushed to me at all! Relationships founded on extreme circumstances, always tend to be more intense, and move more quickly than other relationships. And NO ONE experienced more extreme circumstances together than Tyler and Caroline.

      I mean, she’s supported him through BOTH of his first werewolf transformations. She’s been there for him, when he was at his most vulnerable. (Not to mention has hugged him, while he was naked . . . A LOT.)

      And Tyler has experienced Caroline’s vulnerability too. He saw her when she was kidnapped. He supported her when Matt dumped her. Plus, Caroline is effectively the ONLY person Tyler can truly be himself around, since his family and friends don’t know he’s a werewolf. And that’s gotta bring two people together as well. Plus, let’s face it, Tyler’s a hormonal teenager / teen wolf, who’s had the fortitude to spend THREE MONTHS with the girl he loves, DAY IN AND DAY OUT, without so much as copping a feel! I mean, that’s gotta take it’s toll on a guy, right? 😉

      And don’t even get me started on those supernatural urges . . . 😉

      Plus, for two people who’s relationship has been characterized by a lot of LOOOOOONG conversations, I thought it was fitting that their mutual decision to FINALLY scratch that itch they’ve both been feeling for months was a relatively silent one. (Save for all that moaning, of course. ;))

      Ahhhh, Delena. Have you ever noticed how every time those two talk to one another, they look seconds away from making out? I LOVE IT! Ever since Season 1, Elena just can’t seem to keep herself from staring at Damon’s lips, whenever she talks to him. And then he works that Eye Thing on her, and she’s pretty much putty in his hands . . .

      Man, I can’t wait for these two to finally scratch THEIR itch! Speaking of which, have you seen the new webclip for “The Hybrid?” Did it make you as annoyed at Elena as it made me? (And this is coming from a HARDCORE Delena fan!)

      Just wondering . . .

  18. Amelia

    I’m blushing right now, thank you so much for the kind words! I had an amazing time live blogging with you and everyone else as well!

    Oh God, your “Tyler voice” is awesome, I can totally imagine him saying everything you just stated. Hopefully we’ll see some nice flashbacks, but I doubt it, unfortunately. Also, how whipped is Tyler?! He basically said that if she tells him to stop dating, he will. I love how in their first kiss scene, Tyler interrupted Caroline as she was speaking, but in the second kiss, it was the opposite! The evolution of Tyler/Caroline is just amazing, and Michael and Candice’s chemistry is absolutely mind-boggling!

    Delena.. their scenes always make me have a huge range of emotions. I like how the writers juxtaposed the Delena vs. Stelena dynamics of the necklace in that birthday scene. This necklace initially started off as a way to protect Elena FROM Damon and his compulsion, but over the course of three seasons, this necklace eventually became a Delena symbol from the “I wanted it to be real” scene in 1×14, to the “I love you” compulsion scene in 2×08, and now this scene in 3×01. It became a symbol of their mutual trust in each other, and it’s just beautiful when you think about it.

    Oh,and if you’re referring to the clip of Elena fighting werewolves in the woods, then yes, I’m very annoyed with Elena and her recent antics. Didn’t Damon JUST warn her about how far gone Stefan is? Just because Stefan called her on her birthday doesn’t mean that his humanity is fully intact. She needs to focus on.. oh I don’t know.. SCHOOL, JEREMY, etc.

    Do you think Elena will have a full mental breakdown soon? So much has happened to her in such a small span of time that I’m waiting for something in her to finally crack. Elena tries to hide her emotions and pretend everything is fine, but she needs to know that there are people who are there for her, and won’t judge her for going crazy. She also needs to learn that when Stefan is on human blood, he isn’t the same person! How many times does she have to learn and witness this for it to finally stick?

    Also.. the scene where Damon was yelling at Elena and telling her the cold hard truth was just heartbreaking. Here is the woman he loves,who is looking for the man that she loves, who Damon caused to be Klaus’s wingman. Of course it isn’t his fault, but you know Damon.. he feels incredibly guilty about the entire situation and you could tell that he wanted to hug Elena or say sorry.. but he couldn’t.

    What does this show do to my feelings?

    • Ooh, excellent point about the necklace, not only symbolizing mutual trust in the Delena relationship, but also signifying a gradual shift in Elena’s affections. You know, I had COMPLETELY forgotten that Stefan initially gave Elena the vervain necklace to protect her from DAMON. After all, as far as Stefan knew at the time he bought it for her, Damon was the only “bad” vampire in Mystic Falls. 😉 My, how times have changed . . .

      Oh, and in terms of the scene that made me mad at Elena, check THIS out:

      http://www.vampire-diaries.net/tv-series/new-webclip-from-the-hybrid-ep302

      Insensitive much, Elena? He just told you his GIRLFRIEND died! And YOUR BOYFRIEND killed her . . . in cold blood. So, now you think it’s a good time to talk about phantom phone calls? Seriously?

      I don’t know. I just expected a little more empathy from the girl, who was so supportive of Damon following Rose’s death, despite the fact that Damon himself wasn’t yet ready to own up to his feelings of loss. It just feels like a bit of a step back for her, emotionally, is all. Then again, it’s just a 1-minute clip, so perhaps, we are viewing it a bit out of context.

      Oh, and I’m sorry, I totally missed your earlier question about Gossip Girl. I absolutely plan to continue recapping it this season. Things FINALLY seem to be looking up for our favorite SHIP.

      And though Chuck and Blair appear to be across the country from one another in early episodes, I find it refreshing that the trailers show a much more laidback, scoundrelly, Season 1 and 2 type Chuck (as opposed to the mopey, dour one, we were stuck with for most of Season 4). And for me, that’s a sign of VERY good things to come! 🙂

  19. Amelia

    WOW. Elena needs to stop putting Stefan on this high pedestal. She needs to stop being so naive and stop thinking of him as a saint who can do no wrong. You would think that this new ripper! Stefan would change her perspective, but she is still in denial. Methinks that Elena will have to actually SEE ripper! Stefan in action with her own eyes before it finally sets in that he is a monster right now.

    She could have stated a simple apology to Damon, then use this apology as a segue to tell Damon that Stefan called.. but nope. Andie was also Jenna’s friend so you would think that she will be a lot more sensitive about the situation. Ugh. Elena needs to get it together, and fast. I always defend her, but her recent actions are having me increasingly irritated.

    Yes, the clips look awesome! I’m glad that Chuck seems to have a less angsty and more of a fun storyline this season, because the writers dump so much emotional drama on him. The guy seriously needs a break!
    Did you see the new trailer where Chuck was at Dan’s loft?
    DAN: You weren’t the last one to kiss her before Louis. I was.
    CHUCK: The last one she was with was me. I’m referring to FULL CARNAL KNOWLEDGE!

    Way to immediately shut him down, Bass! I LOVE IT.

  20. Hypa Kitty

    Hey! I know I’m well behind, but in my defence! UK time VD is only on episode 2! So I need to catch up 😀

    Must say.. i ABSOLUTEFREAKINGLY loved this episode!! So much to say..

    Delena eye fucking, the tension! just cant stay away from it… saying that the competition presented by forbes-lockwood may have surpassed even delena!

    Already promising to be an amazing season, can’t wait to watch the rest (yes ill be catching up with ya’ll no way i can wait weeks!) xxxx

    • Hey Hypa Kitty! I’m so psyched that you are back on the TVD train! If you loved episode 1, you are absolutely going to ADORE Episode 2! The Hybrid remains one of my favorite episodes of the Season. Ooh, and you want action and plot twists? Just wait until you get to episodes 5 and 6.

      YAY! I’m so excited for you! Part of me almost wishes I hadn’t seen the episodes yet, so that I could have all that sexy Delena goodness to look forward to, as well. Definitely keep me posted, as you get caught up. I’d love to hear your thoughts on the other episodes! 😉

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