Tag Archives: Alice in Wonderland

Anatomy of a Trailer – Burlesque

The way I see it, Burlesque, the upcoming movie / musical starring Christina Aguilera, in her big screen debut, will either be truly spectacular . . .

 . . . or ridiculously bad.

The film follows Ali (Aquilera), as she escapes from whatever podunk town she came from, and heads off to Hollywood with big dreams and little cash.

View from a dirty bus window.

She finds a job as a waitress at a struggling night club, called Burlesque Lounge, run by Tess (Cher).  And . . . well, I’ll let you see for yourself .  . .

:32 – “When you are putting on your makeup, it is like you’re an artist.  But instead of painting a canvas, you are painting a face.”

 . . . or, in Cher’s case, a face made of canvas.

So, after seeing Cher in this trailer, I’ve come to two conclusions: (1) She looks pretty good.  Her face really hasn’t changed that much since the 90’s . . .

(2) The reason Cher’s face hasn’t changed since the 90’s, is that it hasn’t moved since then.  Did you watch that scene where she was putting on her makeup?  I felt like I was watching an expert ventriloquist!

Bet you can’t guess which one is real?

:49 – “Great enthusiasm, terrible timing.”

It looks like Stanley Tucci will be playing the role of the “man behind the older woman” . . .

 and the “staunch supporter / behind the scenes mentor” of the younger one. 

It’s The Devil Wears Prada all over again.

:57 – Kristen Bell is in this movie!

I heart her, even when she plays mean and unlikeable characters . . .

  . . . and it seems like she will be playing one here too.

1:02 – “The question is, do you have the talent?  Because you’re on . . .”

Hey, that was Cam Gigandet!

What?  You don’t remember CAM?  Sure you do!  He was the douche responsible for Marissa Cooper’s death on The O.C.  . . .

 . . . and the douche who wanted to beat Sean Farris to a pulp in Never Back Down .  . .

 . . . and the douche who wanted to eat Bella in Twilight . . .

In fact, Cam’s “Douching Schedule” was SO uncompromising, that he rarely had time to put on a shirt . . .

 .  . . which is why I love him!

1:12 – “What happened to all the great dancers in L.A.?” 

             “They’re all Dancing with the Stars.

I think this was meant to be somewhat of an inside joke, as Dancing with the Stars’ Julianne Hough is said to have signed on to  this film.

It seems a little odd that they didn’t put her in the trailer, though.

1:17 – “What is she doing up there?”

The Genie in a Bottle dance, perhaps?

1:27 – “Nobody can tell you.  You gotta make me believe that you belong on that stage.  That it’s yours, and that nobody can take it from you.  Now you want to show me something?  Show me THAT!”

WOW, Cher, I’m so inspired now!

I might even start taking violin lessons — on a tiny violin, kind of like the one I heard playing in the background, during that speech you just made.

1:46 – And there are those infamous Aguilera pipes we’ve come to know so well. . .

Too bad she’s dressed like a bachelor party stripper . . .

1:48 – OMG!  It’s Alan Cummings!

This guy kinda scares me.   But I can’t remember why . . .

Now I remember . . .

1:51 – McSteamy ALERT!  McSteamy ALERT!

Hold on to your panties, ladies.  Because they are about to fall . . .

2:07 – “Clearly, one of us has underestimated the other.”

Oooh!  I smell a Cat Fight!  And I don’t know about you, but my money is on Veronica Mars!

She’s small, but scrappy.  Then again . . .

This could actually be a real toss up.

2:16 – Aww Cam!  I knew you wouldn’t let me down!

2:24 – “Alice?  Well, welcome to Wonderland.”

Burlesque dances into theaters on November 24, 2010 (Thanksgiving).  Will YOU see it?

[www.juliekushner.com]

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Raiders of the Lost (Inner) Child – A Recap of Lost’s “Lighthouse”

“You may be the ‘Chosen Candidate’ Jack Shepard, but do YOU have a cool hat and whip?  I think not . . .”

Tonight’s installment of Lost was all about the kiddies!

More specifically, this episode dealt with finding and, coming to terms with, youth, both in the literal and metaphorical sense.  Tonight, Jack literally located and then reconciled with the son that none of us knew he had.  In doing so, he confronted his own daddy abandonment issues, and came one step closer to accepting his destiny as  . . .

The WINNING CANDIDATE for . . .

 In bat shit crazier news, Claire made a baby doll out of a dead animal carcass, fatally axed a guy, and majorly creeped out Poor Jin, all for the love of a boy named Aaron.

Oh and did I mention . . . the DONKEY WHEEL is back?

Let’s get down to business, shall we?

Dude, Where’s My Appendix?

When we last left Doctor Jack in Flash-Sideways World, he was at the airport, passing his business card off to a wheelchair-bound (but living) Locke, while filing a “lost luggage” claim for his dead dad’s coffin.  Now, back home in his apartment, Jack is on the phone with his mother, filling her in on all of the gory details of his trip, when he notices a scar on his stomach.  “When did I have my appendix out?’  Jack inquires.

Sidenote:  If you recall, in the original Lost timeline, Juliet diagnosed Jack with appendicitis and removed his appendix on the island in Season 4, Episode 10 “Something Nice Back Home.”

Jack’s mother explains that Jack had his appendectomy when he was about eight-years old.  I find it a bit strange that Alt World Jack wouldn’t remember having this particular surgery.  Sure, eight is a young age, but not so young that you wouldn’t remember something as traumatic as undergoing major surgery. 

Unlike the past flash-sideways we have seen, in which the Losties may exhibit brief flashes of “déjà vu” for their “original timeline” lives, but seem more or less at home in their new (?) skins, Jack seems completely (forgive the pun) “Lost” in Flash-Sideways world.  It is almost as though Island Jack has been plucked from the original timeline and placed in this new one, without being given any explanation as to how things are different here. 

 

or Jack Shephard?

Noting the time, Jack quickly gets off the phone with his Mommy and rushes to a nearby private school to pick up . . . HIS TEENAGE SON?  David Shepard?

“My brain hurts!”

Upon hearing the pair converse, it becomes immediately obvious that Jack’s and David’s relationship is strained.  In fact, Jack barely seems to know his son at all.  (Doesn’t remember his appendectomy, doesn’t know his son — is this merely a case of VERY early onset dementia or something odder?)

Back at the apartment, Jack notices that David is reading an annotated copy of Alice in Wonderland, the same story that Jack read to baby Aaron in “Something Nice Back Home.”

Curiouser and Curiouser . . .”

Jack leaves his son in the apartment and heads to his mother’s house, to help her find Jack’s father’s missing will.  When his mother finds it, she asks Jack if he knows “Claire Littleton.”  To which Jack replies . . .

“Hell yeah I do!   That bitch turned effing nuts!”

Actually, we don’t get to hear how Jack replies at all, because the producers cut away from the scene, before he can offer his response . . .  Does Alt World Jack know his half-sister Claire?  Only time will tell . . . hopefully.

When Jack returns to his apartment, his son is MIA.  Jack heads to his ex-wife’s (?) house, extracting its key from under a White Rabbit statute (yet another Alice in Wonderland reference).  Upon listening to his son’s answering machine, Jack learns that David has snuck off to a conservatory for an admissions audition.

Jack rushes to the conservatory, arriving just in time to hear his son play piano.  He beams with pride at his son’s clearly gifted musical talent.  As Jack watches from the wings, another father compliments David’s talents, and, noting the boy’s youth, asks how long he has been playing.  Wait a minute . . . we know that dad!  It’s . . .

POISON PILL GIVER, DOGEN!

Jack honestly admits that he doesn’t know how long his son has been playing. 

Something is definitely fishy here . . . 

Meeting up with David outside the Conservatory, Jack asks his son why the latter never told him about the audition.  David explains that, when he was younger, Jack was very intense about David’s piano lessons.  David feared Jack would see him as a failure if he didn’t perform perfectly at the audition.

Heartened by this confession, Jack tells David how Jack’s own father once told him that he “didn’t have what it takes” to succeed in medicine.  Jack explains to David that he loves him and could never ever consider him a failure.  Father and son both get a bit teary eyed, and it really feels as though Jack has righted his own father’s wrongs through this exchange.  Perhaps that was the whole point  . . .

 . . . and then comes the carcass in the baby carriage!

“HELLLLLP MEEEEE!”

Back on Lost island, Claire frees a very freaked out Jin from the bear trap in which he was caught last week.  She then expertly stitches up his wounded legs and takes him to her makeshift campsite, where she has presumably been living for about three years.  Jin does a bit of snooping here, and finds this really creepy baby basinet with a stuffed animal carcass inside.  I sure hope that’s machine washable . . .

Claire then drags Justin, the remaining living Other who accosted Jin last week, into her camp and ties him up.  With a freshly sharpened ax, Jungle Lady threatens to chop up Justin if he doesn’t tell her where her baby Aaron is.  Justin has no clue, and tells Claire as much.  Unfortunately for Justin, Claire doesn’t believe him.  After all, her father and “her friend” told her that the Others were hiding Aaron inside the temple.  When Claire walks away, Justin pleads with Jin to untie him.  He explains that if they don’t get away, Claire will kill them BOTH. 

Jin initially seems unconvinced.  After all, Claire may have bad hair right now, and poor taste in childrens’ toys, but Jin can’t truly see her harming HIM, a fellow Lostie!  Claire then shows Justin and Jin the scars she has sustained from when the Others tortured and branded her at the temple, presumably using the same technique on HER that Dogen used on Sayid the Maybe Zombie.

Jin comes clean to Claire, explaining that Kate had taken Aaron off the island and had raised him for three years.  Claire thanks Jin.  She then kills Justin, anyway.

“Not very nice, Claire Bear!”

Realizing that Claire is truly off her rocker, and beginning to fear for his friend Kate’s life, Jin takes back his words, explaning that he lied about Kate in an effort to save Justin’s life.  Jin then claims to know where Aaron is hidden, and offers to take Claire there.

Claire tells Jin that if Kate had taken Aaron, she would have killed her.  And just when it seems like things can’t get any weirder or scarier for Jin, “Locke” shows up . . . except he’s not Locke . . . of course.  He’s the Lockness Smokey Monster, a.k.a Claire’s  “friend” who told her that the Others had Aaron.

All Around the Donkey Wheel . . .

While in search of food, Hurley “I Talk to Dead People” Reyes encounters our dearly departed friend Jacob, who is in desperate need of Hurley’s help.  Jacob gives our “unlucky” friend a series of instructions, which the latter dutifully inscribes on his arm.  According to Jacob, Hurley needs to commandeer Jack in a special mission.   To get Jack on board, Hurley must tell Jack that “he has what it takes.”

The two trek off into the sunset, where they eventually come across this . . .

“How come we’ve never seen this before?” Hurley inquires.  (How indeed . . .)

Jack and Hurley trek to the top of the lighthouse and find what appears to be a replica of the infamous donkey wheel from last season, accented by a few mirrors, or “looking glasses,” if you prefer.  Printed around the wheel are a series of names and number similar to the ones Nu-Locke showed Sawyer in the cave during last week’s episode, with some notable differences.  For one thing . . .

Kate’s on the wheel!  She’s number 51!

Hurley instructs Jack to turn the wheel to number 108 (which has next to it the name “Wallace” – Who the heck is Wallace?), and then look in the mirror.  Annoyed that Jacob has refused to speak to Jack in person, Jack turns the wheel instead to his own name and the corresponding number 23.  He then looks in the mirror and is horrified to find his childhood home looking back at him.  In a huff, Jack breaks the mirror and storms out of the lighthouse.

Later, Jacob reappears to a disappointed Hurley who feels as though he failed in his task.  Jacob explains that things are going exactly as planned.  As the coach of Team Jacob, Ghost Man apparently knows exactly what it takes to bend people to his will.  For some, like Hurley, merely asking for a favor is all it takes.  But more stubborn folks like Jack, however, need to come to certain conclusions on their own, which is exactly what Jack appears to be doing at the end of this unbelievably complex episode.

So, what did you think of The Lighthouse?  Have you joined Team Jacob yet?  Were you relieved to find Kate’s name on the wheel?  Do you know where I can get a cool hairdo like Claire’s?

 

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Anatomy of a Trailer: Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland

By now, you know that I LOVE television shows, particularly hour-long dramas.  What you may not know is that I also love movie trailers!  It’s a bit hard for me to admit this, but, sometimes, I find movie trailers to be the best part of the movie-going experience.

(Sometimes the movie trailers you see before the movie are even better than the movie itself . . . MUCH BETTER!)

Movie trailers are not just entertaining, they are also cost efficient.  Consider this: according to the National Association for Theater Owners, the average movie ticket price in 2009 was $7.50 cents.  And I live just outside New York City, where movie tickets can set you back as much as $13!  These are some pretty hefty prices to pay for ONE MOVIE that you may or may not actually enjoy. 

On the other hand, if I get to the theater early, I can sit through 20 minutes of trailers.  These trailers contain all of the best scenes (often giving away most of the plot and, sometimes, the ending) of some FIVE or SIX movies . . . ALL FOR FREE

If you don’t get to the movies early enough to catch the trailers, that’s OK, because movie trailers are also on television.  Then again, maybe you missed the trailer for  Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland on TV too.    Perhaps you fast-forwarded through it with your DVR.  Or, maybe, you were peeing during it.  Fear not, because this is where I come in . . .

A lot of juice for one trailer right.? Here’s what I saw . . .

:18 – Mia Wasikowska, who was absolutely awesome as the troubled gymnast, Sophie, during Season 1 of HBO’s In Treatment, will be taking the helm as the titular Alice.  My initial thought was that she looked a bit old to be playing the young child from Lewis Carroll’s novels.  Later, however, I read that Burton’s Alice will not actually be a retelling of Alice in Wonderland, nor its follow-up Through the Looking Glass, but, rather, a sequel of sorts.  Here, Alice revisits Wonderland 10 years later, with no memory of her experiences from the first two books.

This is an important fact to note for high school students who are assigned the Alice books as required reading, as I was during my junior year.  This movie will NOT HELP YOU!  (Unfortunately, neither will the original Disney cartoon).

“Oh dear!  If I knew I ACTUALLY had to READ, I wouldn’t have smoked so much with Caterpillar . . .”

:22 – Is it just me, or does the guy proposing to Alice look a bit like Ronald Weasley from the Harry Potter films?

:40 – Down the rabbit hole goes Alice . . .

:54 – CGI Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum are really creepy looking.  They are the size of Oompa Loompas, wear clothing like Pugsley from Addams Family, and have heads like Uncle Fester (also from the Addams Family).  No me likey . . .

:59 – The Cheshire Cat is kind of cute looking, as is the White Rabbit.  I guess Disney needed something they could sell as a stuffed animal from this film that wouldn’t give kids nightmares . . .

1:03 – Johnny Depp’s Mad Hatter looks like someone took Johnny Depp’s Edward Scissorhands, crossed him with Johnny Depp’s Willy Wonka, and dropped the amalgamation in a vat of tie dye.  One day, I’d like to see Johnny Depp really push the acting envelope and play . . . an accountant.  Now that would be risky!  (I can’t hate on Johnny Depp though.  In a Hollywood world filled with divas and D-bags, sources tell me that he is a stand up guy, not to mention a big tipper!)

1:18 – The Tea Party scene was my favorite, both in the first Alice book, and in the Disney movie.  It looks like Burton did a great job representing it here.

1:25 – Here’s Helena Bonham Carter, as the Red Queen, doing what she does best: playing a character who is wacked out, crazy, and creepy . . .  but has awesome hair!  She seems to be playing croquet using a flamingo as a mallet, just as the characters did in the first Alice book.

1:41 – Piglets are adorable, even when they have Helena Bonham Carter’s feet on them.

1:52 – Here, it looks as though Alice is the rook in a giant game of chess being played out between the Red Queen and the White Queen.  In the second Alice  book, Through the Looking Glass, a chess game is the framing device for the story, with Alice playing the pawn.  If you buy the Cliff Notes for the book, (which I did) you will actually find a chess diagram that maps out Alice’s precise chess moves in the story from pawn to Queen.  Coincidentally, a life-sized chess board was also featured in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone (both in the book and in the movie version).

1:58 – Anne Hathaway looks absolutely stunning as the White Queen.  In the past few years, Hathaway has really shown herself to be a brilliantly versatile actress.  She has definitely come far since her Princess Diaries days.  I suspect we will be enjoying her films for a long time to come . . .

2:17 – Here we get our first glimpse of the Jabberwocky, which is described, in a poem that Alice reads in Through the Looking Glass, as a dragon-type monster.  Burton has said that the Jabberwocky story will be the framing device for his film, just as a card game framed the first Alice book, and a chess game framed the second.  I think this is kind of a strange choice, seeing as the Jabberwocky poem is actually jibberish.  But I’ll admit that the concept is  intriguing . . .

2:24 – Ah, another movie in 3D . . . I am really glad I saved those goofy glasses I bought last month to see Avatar.  That’s going to save me $3.00!

So, those were my thoughts on the trailer.  What did you think?

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Lost and Zombies – A Recap of “What Kate Does”

You know how when you were a little kid, and you were absolutely certain you were going to have a snow day, so you stayed up late and skimped on your homework in anticipation of the big event?  Well, unfortunately, I am no longer a student.  And, as for a snow day, it could be the Apocalypse, and they still wouldn’t close my office.  Yet, I have decided to embrace my inner naughty girl and stay up late to type up this Lost recap. 

So here goes . . .

Kate in Flash-Sideways Land

“Curiouser and curioser .  . .”

When we last left Kate, back in alt-2004, she had just landed safely at LAX, given U.S. Marshal Edward Mars the slip, and hijacked a taxi that contained within it a very pregnant Claire.  In the episode’s opening scene, Kate holds the taxi driver at gunpoint and directs him out of the airport.  (By the way, I loved the random Midnight Cowboy reference inserted into this scene by the infamous dead-in-another- timeline Lostie, Doctor Arzt.  “Hey, I’m walking here!”   – Classic!)

Soon after the trio makes a getaway, the cowardly taxi driver jumps out of the cab and heads for the hills, leaving Claire to fend for herself.  (Even in Alt World, chivalry is apparently dead.)  Kate then forces Claire to give up her purse, and kicks her out of the cab. 

(Bad Kate!  Claire is so taking down your medallion number.  You will NEVER drive a cab in this town again!) 

Next, Kate heads to a car repair shop and pays the auto mechanic $200 to remove her handcuffs.  I’m not exactly sure where she got the money, seeing as most people don’t exactly carry cash on the way to the slammer.  Plus, Runaway Claire seemed pretty poor, so I doubt this money was hers.  However, I digress . . .

Later, as Kate is digging through Claire’s purse, she finds a stuffed whale, some baby paraphenalia, and a polaroid of the pregnant Claire, which presumably Claire planned to give to her adoptive parents so that her son would one day know his biological mother.  Struck with feelings of guilt (or deja vu), Kate drives the cab back to the bus stop where Claire is waiting.  Once there, Kate learns that Claire was supposed to be picked up at the airport by her son’s soon-to-be adoptive parents, but they never showed. 

Kate offers to give Claire a ride.  Genius Claire then agrees to get back in the taxi cab with the lunatic escape prisoner who held her at gunpoint and stole her purse.  Only on television will such acts of “bravery” NOT  leave you with a bullet lodged in your skull.

“Way to go, smarty pants!”

When Kate and Claire arrive at the home of the prospective adoptees, a nervous Claire asks Kate to go into the house with her.  Kate reluctantly agrees, and the two knock on the door.  A disheveled woman, eyes puffy from tears, explains that her husband has just left her and that she cannot raise a baby on her own.  Claire responds by going into labor right on this woman’s porch.  That’ll teach you to call first, before canceling your baby adoption plans!”

The most helpful convict ever, Kate drives Claire to the hospital and checks in with her, using an assumed name.  In ICU, Claire is cared for by none other than . . .  DR.  CREEPY MC-OTHER, ETHAN ROM!

There’s nothing McDreamy about this guy . . .

Dr. Creepy McOther tells Claire that she is far enough along to give birth.  However, if she doesn’t want to do that just yet, Creepy McOther can shoot her up with a lot of drugs and somehow postpone the birth.  If you recall, Creepy McOther kidnapped Claire on the island and shot her up with drugs there too.  In her second “super smart” move of the evening, Claire chooses the drugs . . . again.

NOOOOOOOO!  DON’T DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As if to protest her AWFUL decision, the baby heart monitor starts going haywire.  “Is Aaron going to be OK?”  Claire inquires frantically.

Instantly, both she and Kate flinch, as if recalling that, in alternate timeline, Claire’s child is actually named Aaron.  This is clearly a weird situation.  After all, in this timeline, Claire would have no reason to name her baby, as she planned on giving it up for adoption as soon as it was born.  Spooky! 

Eventually the monitors calm down.  Soon after, a couple of federal agents come looking for Kate, who is hiding nearby.  Claire covers for Kate, and the obviously-not-too-bright agents take their leave without asking too many questions.  Apparently, the agents and Claire share an IQ.

Kate thanks Claire for her generosity (or stupidity, depending on how you see it).  She then tells Claire that she should keep the baby.  Claire responds by offering Kate her credit card to be used during the remainder of her time on the run.  Quite a good team, these two.  In fact, they remind me of another female duo I used to know and love . . .

And we all know how that ended . . .

Jagged Little Pill

Back in the present day island world, Sayid has just come back from the dead, and Miles and Hurley have a few questions for him.    Miles wonders if Sayid saw the infamous white light.  Unfortunately, Sayid only remembers being shot and nothing more.  “You aren’t a zombie are you?”  Hurley inquires.

“No, I’m not a zombie,” Sayid answers straight-faced.

“OK.  We’ll be in the food court,” replies Hurley, before he and Miles exit stage left.

Could I just say, that these two have the best television bromance since Boston Legal’s Alan Shore and Denny Crane.  If they had their own show, I would totally watch.

Hugo “Hurley” Reyes and Miles Straume star in “We See Dead People.”  Coming Soon . . .

Mysterious Other-Others, Lennon and Dogen, also have some questions for the undead Sayid.  Unfortunately, they are interrupted in their interrogation, when a very angry Sawyer holds them and their minions at gunpoint.  Turns out our hot and tormented friend wants to blow this popsicle stand . . . and fast.  Knowing that Sawyer means business, Lennon and Dogen let him go, but then send two of their cronies out into the jungle to retrieve him.  To protect Sawyer and ensure his safety, Kate and Jin offer to go with these two men.

Kate gives the Others the slip and soon finds Sawyer at the Dharma cabin where he and Juliet played house with eachother in the past.  A heartbroken Sawyer confides in Kate that he feels responsible for Juliet’s death, since she wanted to leave the island and he hadn’t let her.  Had she left the island when she wanted to do so, she may have lived.  He then pulls out a ring and tells Kate that he had planned to ask Juliet to marry him.  Sawyer tosses the ring into the river, while a conflicted and still lovestruck Kate looks on in anguish . . .

Back at the temple, Lennon and Dogen take former torturer Sayid and . . . torture him, by prodding him with a burning hot poker and submitting him to some weird electroshock-type therapy.  “Why did you do this to me?” Sayid inquires.

“It was a test.  You passed,” explains Lennon.

After, Sayid leaves, however, Lennon and Dogen make it very clear that Sayid has, in fact,  failed the “test.”  Lennon then tells Jack that Sayid is “infected.”  He asks that Jack give Sayid a large silver pill to “save him.” 

A distrustful Jack asks Lennon what is in the pill, but answers are not forthcoming.  When Jack confronts Sayid about all this, Sayid agrees to take the pill if Jack thinks he should, because Sayid trusts Jack.

Still uncertain as to the right path, Jack confronts Dogen once again.  In a bold and impulsive act that is decidedly un-Jack, the Good Doc takes the pill himself.  A frantic Dogen heimlichs the pill out of Jack’s mouth instantly, and quickly explains that it contains poison.  “Why do you want to kill Sayid?”  Jack asks incredulously.

According to Lennon and Dogen, Sayid has a sickness, and once it enters his heart, the old Sayid will be completely “lost.”  When Jack asks how they know this, Lennon replies, “Because the same thing happened to . . .”

(Now at this point, I expected Lennon to say “Ben.”  After all, when Kate and Sawyer brought the young Ben to the temple to be healed from his bullet wound, Richard Alpert explained that once healed, he would “lose all innocence.”  So, it would make sense for Lennon to use Ben’s name.  But instead he says . . . )

 . . . “your sister.”

CLAIRE???????

Remember a few seasons back when Claire was rescued from a massive explosion at the Dharma compound with nothing but a splitting headache?  She then abandoned her baby in the middle of the night, and was never seen or heard from again, until an eerily calm, almost ghostlike, version of her appeared to Locke in Jacob’s cabin.  Suddenly, everything started to make sense . .

AHA!

In the final scene, the Other minions find and recapture Jin in the jungle.  Chip-On-His-Shoulder Minion looks as if he is about to shoot poor Jin, when shots ring out.  Both Other minions instantly fall down dead.  Jin looks up, confused, as an emotionless, gun-wielding, Claire steps out into view . . .

So what did you think?  Are Sayid and Claire really zombies?  Are the Losties ever going to get off the island in the present day?  Would you watch a buddy crime investigation show staring Miles and Hurley?

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