Tag Archives: Bad Moon Rising

Party on, Team Delena! – My Top Ten Damon and Elena Moments from The First Half of The Vampire Diaries’ Second Season

Shortly after The Vampire Diaries aired its first Season Finale, I “came out of the closet” on this very blog, as a firm and vehement supporter of Team Delena, or, as I like to call it “The TVD Mother Ship.”  I then went on to cement my fangirl allegiance to this fabulous television couple, by analyzing their ten most sizzling Season 1 moments. 

Well, now we are nearly halfway done with Season TWO of The Vampire Diaries.  With eleven new episodes under our belt, and an interminably LONG mid-season hiatus staring us down, like an unfed Stefan Salvatore . . .

 . . . I thought it was high time we revisited this topic again!  Wouldn’t you agree?

Source

(I’ll take that as a “Yes!”)

Admittedly, it hasn’t exactly been the easiest of seasons for us Delena fans.  For one thing, there was that whole “Damon sort of/ kind of temporarily killed Elena’s little brother” thing that happened in the season premiere  . . .

The aforementioned event not only forced us to endure OODLES of annoying smack talk from Stelena fans the world over, it also royally PISSED OFF ELENA (understandably so).  As a result, Damon (and the rest of us) were subjected to Elena’s “Poopy PussFace” virtually nonstop, for at least the first three episodes . . .

 

Suffice it to say that Poopy PussFace and Happy Couples generally do not mix . . .

And yet, we’re talking about a couple that’s one-half vampire here.  And when you’re already undead, what doesn’t kill you, only makes you MORE AWESOME . . . 

For me, the fact that Damon and Elena endured the unfathomable angst and drama of the “Jeremy Neck Snap,” and yet STILL managed to muster up all the fire, energy, and super sexy moments they shared, during the first half of Season 2, only serves to show the sheer strength of their relationship.  Because when two people can survive something like THAT, and still manage to constantly eye f*ck eachother, and invade one another’s personal space like nobody’s business . . . now, that’s a couple who’s playing FOR KEEPS!

And now that I’m off my soap box, we can start this post in earnest. 

So, without further adieu, I bring to you, my Top Ten Delena moments from the first half of Season 2 of The Vamprie Diaries . . .

[Note:  As you probably know by now, the CW is SUPER finicky about its clip embedding.  So, when you see the YouTube screens, simply click on the internal links included within them.  That should direct you to the Delena-filled video you desire. 🙂  Sorry for the inconvenience!]

10. Pillow Talk

Episode: “By the Light of the Moon” – 2 X 11

Setting the Scene:

After returning from a “Kamikaze Death Mission,” which involved attempting to give herself up to the EEEEEEVIL Santa Klaus, in order to save the people she loves from certain death, Elena seems determined to put herself in harms way, yet again.  But when she tries to leave home with the stolen Moonstone, in order to “rescue” Stefan from Katherine’s Hot Sex Den, Elena is shocked to find that Bonnie (at Damon’s bidding) has charmed the windows and doors, thereby making Elena a prisoner in her own home.

Enter a very glib Damon Salvatore, who seems very much looking forward to a day filled with gloating, flirting, and, if all goes well, a friendly game of Tonsil Hockey with his good pal / hostage, Elena Gilbert.

Potent Quotables:

DAMON: (After being on the receiving end of one of Captive Elena’s infamous Death Stares) “Awwww come on, Pouty!  At least give me two points for ingenuity.”

ELENA:  “Do you think this is funny?”

DAMON: “Yes, Elena.  I find hilarity in the lengths I have to go to to repeatedly save your life.”

And later  . . .

DAMON: (To Jeremy, when the latter inquires as to where Bonnie is) “She’s on moonstone duty, and I’m on (inclines head toward Elena) Elena Patrol.”

Still later  . . .

DAMON: (To Elena, after being called away by Alaric, on yet another Team Bad Ass Mission) “You should get out.  Enjoy the sun.  Oh . . . wait . . . You Can’t.”

ELENA: *throws pillow at his head*

Why it made the list:

This small scene truly represents the lighthearted, fun nature of the Damon and Elena relationship.  For me, this is one of things that differentiates Delena from Stelena.  When Elena is with Stefan, she is definitely sweet and romantic, but nearly always, serious.  Damon brings out a certain feistiness in Elena.   He makes her blood boil.  And from my experience, when a guy makes you hot emotionally and mentally, he makes you hot sexually, as well . . .

Stefan tends to act tentative and cautious when he’s around Elena.  It’s almost as if he’s afraid he’s going to break her, or something.  Damon has no such qualms about giving back to Elena, whatever she dishes it out, be it a witty barb, or flying fist, or a pillow.  Damon respects Elena.  She is his equal, and he finds that incredibly sexy.  Check out the way Damon’s eyes light up, when he sees Elena for the first time in this scene.  Watch how he plops on the couch, and places an arm around her, as if the pair are out on a date, and not on “House Arrest.”

But, perhaps, more important than how Damon behaves, and what he says, is how he acts and what he does.  Damon obviously feels it is his duty to protect Elena.  He shows that in this scene, by willingly going on Elena Patrol.  After all, Damon knows that Elena would do the same thing to protect HIM, if he was in danger. 

Damon and Elena can banter and snipe at one another all day long.  But that doesn’t obscure the fact that these are two people who care deeply for eachother, and are each unconditionally willing to sacrifice their own lives for the other’s safety.

9.  It’s Too Late to Apologize . . .

Episode: “Plan B” – 2 X 6

Setting the Scene:

Katherine’s plans to use Boy Toy Mason and the Moonstone as her keys to wriggle off the top of Santa Klaus’ “Most Likely to Be Gutted Like a Fish” list, were thwarted when Stefan, Elena and the Scooby Gang stole the Moonstone, and Damon murdered Mason in a vengeance- fueled rage . . . 

But Damon REALLY effed things up, when he called Katherine to gloat about it.  Katherine, who was definitely not used to losing, decided to make ELENA pay for Damon’s crimes, by compelling Useless Aunt Jenna to try to off herself with a kitchen carving knife. 

Up until this point, Stefan and Elena had “fake” broken up, in order to keep Katherine from using Elena as a pawn in her Dirty Little Games.  But, since Katherine went after Useless Aunt Jenna anyway, Elena tearfully decides that she needed to break up with Stefan for real.  Damon witnesses the heart-wrenching breakup scene, and feels deeply responsible for the unhappiness of his brother, and the woman he loves.

Potent Quotables:

DAMON: (Calls out to Elena, as she is rushing out the door) “Elena!”

ELENA:  *turns and looks at Damon*

DAMON: (Near tears) “I riled Katherine up.  I wasn’t thinking . . . I DIDN’T THINK . . .”

ELENA: “It doesn’t matter, Damon.  She won.  Katherine won.”

Why it made the list:

This scene truly exemplifies how much Damon has grown as a character, since we met him in early Season 1.  Here’s a guy who’s love interest has just BROKEN UP WITH HER BOYFRIEND.  He should be OVER THE MOON.  Now’s his chance to SWOOP IN AND MAKE HIS MOVE.  But Damon isn’t happy about Elena’s breakup with Stefan at all.  In fact, he’s devastated over it.  He feels guilty about the pain his hubris and rage have unwittingly caused his brother, the possible one true love of his life, and her family.

When Damon calls to Elena in this scene, he is almost in tears.  Her being in pain, causes him twice as much pain.  And though few words are exchanged between Damon and Elena in this scene, volumes are implied.  With his sad eyes, Damon tells Elena he is sorry for the part he played, not only in Jenna’s compelled suicide attempt, but in Elena’s breakup with Stefan too. 

In turn, Elena looks at Damon with compassion and forgiveness.  She does not blame Damon for what happened to Jenna, or what happened between her and Stefan.  As far as Elena is concerned, this is her fight, and her’s alone.  And yet, she can’t help but be touched by Damon’s remorse, as it is a surefire sign of his growing humanity – something she not too long ago feared that he might have lost forever.

8. Paradise by the Dashboard Light

Episode: “Bad Moon Rising” – 2 X 3

Setting the Scene:

Elena is still UBER pissed at Damon for the whole “Jeremy Neck Snap” thing.  But, Damon and Alaric are going on a Werewolf Research Roadtrip to Duke, and Elena desperately wants to tag along.  She hopes to collect some intel from the school, as to why the heck she looks exactly like Katherine.  Despite her supposed anger at Damon, sexual tensions between the Bad Boy Vamp and the Good Girl are super high, throughout the trip.  Could this mean that Elena is starting to forgive Damon for his recent sins?  Or is she merely using him to get the information she needs, as Katherine did 140 some odd years ago?

Potent Quotables:

DAMON: “You are not going to be able to hate me forever.”

And later . . .

DAMON: “You have every right to hate me.  I understand.  You hated me before, and we became friends.  It would suck, if that was gone forever.  So, is it?  Have I lost you forever?”

Why it made the list:

Even though Elena tells Damon at the end of this scene, that he has lost her forever, we can tell, based on the way she looks at him, and acts around him, that this is not true.  Elena was so angry with Damon for “killing” Jeremy, at this point in the season, that she desperately wanted to hurt him.  And she did so by toying with his affections for her, and using them to get information about Katherine. 

But remember, boys and girls, Nina Dobrev, may be an actress, but ELENA isn’t.  And her body language . . . ((1) the way she stared deeply into Damon’s eyes when he cornered her by the car; (2) the way her breath caught when he leaned close to her; (3) her obvious feelings of gratitude toward Damon, when he gave her the Petrova Book; (4) and the way she took a pause to ponder what Damon said about how their friendship — having initially grown from hatred — would likely be able to sprout from that same place again) . . . well, it doesn’t lie.

It’s also worth noting the extensive amount of thought Damon has obviously given his relationship with Elena, even at this early stage of the season.  He obviously values her, not just as a prospective love interest, but as a friend, and fellow partner in crime,  And Damon would rather be friends with Elena than nothing at all . . . Given how much in love with her he obviously is, and the very selfish things he has done in the past, his willingness to maintain a completely platonic relationship with the woman he loves says volumes about his growing character . . .

7. The Face Rape

Episode: “The Return” 2 X 1

Setting the Scene:

The season premiere pretty much seemed like it comprised Damon’s WORST DAY EVER!  First, he learned that the woman he kissed on Elena’s porch was NOT actually Elena, but rather the EEEEEEEVIL Katherine, who had spurned Damon all those years ago.  When Damon confronts Elena about the faux-kiss, not only does she have no memory of the event occuring, she acts as though kissing Damon Salvatore would be the most awful thing in the world that could happen to her.  (MORON!)

Damon gets rejected AGAIN, when, after a rousing bout of sex with Katherine . . .

 . . . SHE tells him that SHE never loved him, and was only using him to get into his brother Stefan’s pants, all those years ago . . .

So, Damon responds by doing what most boys do, when they get rejected, multiple times, by multiple women, within the same 24-hour period . . . he gets TOTALLY WASTED!

But then . . . rather than drunk dialing (or drunk texting or drunk e-mailing) Elena, like most boys would do, Damon takes his humiliation one step further, by showing up in her bedroom uninvited . . .

 Potent Quotables:

ELENA: “Thanks for . . . umm . . . looking out for us . . . for me.”

DAMON:  “You’re surprised that I thought you would kiss me back.  You can’t imagine that I would believe that you would want to . . . that what we’ve been doing here means something.  You’re the liar, Elena.  There is something going on between the two of us. and you know it.  And you are lying to me, and you are lying to Stefan, and most importantly, you are lying to yourself.”

ELENA – “You are better than this . . . I care about you . . . I do . . . I care about you.”

Why it made the list:

Some of you might be wondering why, as a Delena fan, I would possibly include this painful, relationship-shattering scene in my countdown.  But here’s the thing . . . while horrible and painful, this scene between Damon and Elena is important to Delena fandom, as it is the very first time BOTH Damon and Elena express their feelings for one another.  That’s right, I said BOTH . . . because Elena DOES admit to caring about Damon in this very scene.

Instinctively, Elena understands the pain Damon has undergone in this episode.  And she knows that he is coping with it, in a self destructive way.  She fears for him, and, at least initially, tries to take care of him, as a mother might take care of an unruly child. 

But Damon, drunk and bitter, as he may be, sees Elena’s care and concern for what it is . . . the underpinings of love.  When Damon confronts Elena with HER feelings toward him, she is clearly not ready to accept them mentally.  But emotionally, we see something click inside Elena.  And had Damon been more sober, had he gone for a sweet and gentle kiss, as opposed to the Face Rape, had he NOT lashed out at Jeremy in anger, there’s no telling what COULD have happened between Damon and Elena in this scene . . .

6. Why Can’t We Be Friends?

Episode: “Kill or Be Killed” – 2 X 5

Setting the Scene:

Wolfy Mason MAJORLY screwed over Stefan and Damon, by outing them as vampires to Caroline’s mom, Sheriff Forbes.  The vampire-hating Sheriff then shot up Damon and Stefan, and locked them in a dungeon for interrogation.

The Sheriff is just about to stake the uncooperative vampires, when her own daughter arrives and outs HERSELF as a vampire to her mother. 

The distraction allows Damon to get the upper hand, and an opportunity to finish off Sheriff Forbes . . . but he doesn’t.  “Relax, you’re my friend,” he tells her sweetly.

Rather than murder the Ole’ Battle Axe, Damon decides to keep her entombed, until the vervain ingested has left her system.  This way, they can compel her to forget what had gone down.  And they all live happily ever after.  (Well . . . not Mason . . . but that’s another story entirely . . .)

Potent Quotables:

ELENA:  “What you did for Caroline’s Mom . . . that’s the Damon who was my friend.”

DAMON: “Hey  . . . Stefan didn’t drink the People Blood . . . if you’re curious.  But he needs to.  And deep down, you know it.”

Why it made the list:

This scene really marks the first time we see Elena admitting that she is starting to forgive Damon for what he has done to Jeremy.  By telling Damon that he has done something honorable — something that reminds her of their former friendship — Elena is acknowledging that she no longer sees Damon as lacking humanity, and she no longer “hates” him.  Elena appreciates the sacrifice of pride Damon made on Caroline’s behalf, and the way in which he still considers Caroline’s mother “a friend,” despite the fact that she tried to have him killed.  If Damon can forgive someone like Caroline’s mom for what she did to him, shouldn’t Elena be able to forgive Damon for what he did to Jeremy?

5. Break Me, Stake Me, Anyway You Want Me

Episode: “Brave New World” – 2 X 2

Setting the Scene:

Caroline has just turned vamp, after having fed on Damon’s blood, prior to being smothered to death by Katherine.  Remembering what happened to Vicki Donovan, Damon views the tempestuous Caroline as a major liability to his way of life.  And so he plans to remove the “un” from Caroline’s “undead” status . . .

Potent Quotables:

ELENA: (about Caroline) “Damon, she’s my friend!”

DAMON:  “Whatever happens, it’s on YOU.”

Why it made the list:

Like the previous example, here we see Damon making a personal sacrifice, based on his strong belief in the power of friendship.  Despite the fact that Damon sees Vampire Caroline as a liability — a danger to herself and others — Damon decides not to harm her, because doing so would hurt ELENA.  Last season, we learned about how important trust is to Damon Salvatore.  This season, we learn how much he also values friendship. 

Oh, and did you notice the heavy sexualized breathing and eye f*cking Damon and Elena were doing, as she thrust her body into his, in order to deflect that phallic stake from Caroline?  SUPER HOT!

4. Shot Through the Heart

Episode: “Bad Moon Rising” – 2 X 3

Setting the Scene:

While searching through Isobel’s office at Duke University, Damon and Elena encounter one of her former students, the VERY ambitious Vanessa.  Vanessa recognizes both Damon and Elena (Katherine?) from Isobel’s research, and doesn’t trust the pair as far as she can throw them.  Did I mention girlfriend is REALLY handy with a crossbow?

Potent Quotables:

DAMON:  “Pull it out . .  I can’t reach it Elena.  Just pull the damn thing out.  It hurts . . .”

ELENA: “You are not going to kill her.  You touch her, and, I swear, I will never speak to you again.”

DAMON:  “What makes you think that has any power over me?  Because I took an arrow in the back for you?  You are severely overestimating yourself.

ELENA: “Right . . . I forgot that I was speaking to a psychotic mind, who snaps and kills people.”

DAMON:  “You are trying to manipulate me.”

ELENA: “If by manipulate you mean ‘tell the truth’ . . . then fine . . . GUILTY.”

Why it made the list:

This Delena scene was FUN with a capital “F,” and sexy with a capital “S.”  The obvious analogies to sex that were made as Elena was ejecting that LARGE BOW from Damon’s back would be totally comical, if both parties weren’t obviously so turned on by them.  I loved how Damon saved Elena’s life here, ONCE AGAIN.  And, yet, she still found time to berate him, and basically call him a psychopath.  Most guys would be infuriated by this, but Damon was clearly enjoying the back and forth of it all.  With Elena pissed at him, the banter was likely one of the things he missed most.

When Damon and Elena are done thrusting their large members at one another, they get into a surprisingly deep discussion of manipulation and the sexual and emotional power each member of the pair has over the other.  Later, we learn that Elena might have been using this power to her advantage,  But at this moment, Damon doesn’t seem to mind being used one bit. . .

3. The Lover’s Quarrel

Episode:  “The Sacrifice” – 2 X 10

Setting the Scene:

Damon and Elena return together from Elena’s Suicide Road Trip to Meet Santa Klaus.  Once home, they learn that Doofus Stefan inadvertently got himself “stuck” in Katherine’s Hot Sex Den.  Elena immediately wants to rush the tomb and save Stefan from Hot Sex with Katherine.  But Damon would rather Team Delena have their own Hot Sex first . . .

Potent Quotables:

ELENA:  “How could you let this happen?”

DAMON:  “What are you talking about? I was too busy saving YOU from your kamikaze mission!  It was the right call, Elena.”

ELENA:  “Right call?  How is any of this the right call?”

ELENA: “Damon, let go of me!  LET GO OF ME . . . Let go of me.  Please!”

DAMON:  “Are you done?”

And later:

STEFAN:  (To Damon)  “Promise me .  . . whatever happens . . . you will protect her.”

DAMON:  “Promise.”

Why it made the list:

Aside from the obvious groping, thrusting, heavy breathing, and personal space invasion (all of which was AWESOME, by the way), what stuck out most for me about this scene was the way Damon and Elena effortlessly assumed a sort of husband and wife dynamic with one another.  Stefan hadn’t even been trapped for 10 minutes, and already Damon and Elena were bickering like an old married couple.  For me, this scene provided a very nice glimpse into what I have no doubt will be the future of our Delena pairing: namely, clever partnerships, followed by heated arguments — arguments which will inevitably devolve into the most mind-blowing makeup sex known to man . . .

2. The Fiercest Foreplay

Episode: “The Sacrifice” – 2 X 10

Setting the Scene:

Remember earlier, when I referenced Elena’s Suicide Road Trip to Meet Santa Klaus?  Well, Damon found out about the Mission from Tattletale Rose and he was NOT HAPPY . . . (He WAS very horny though . . .)

Potent Quotables:

DAMON:  “I said we are leaving .  . . You do not get to make decisions, anymore.”

ELENA:  “When have I ever made a decision?  You and Stefan do that for me . . . Now this is my decision.

DAMON:  “Who’s going to save your life, while you are out there making ‘decisions’?”

ELENA:  “You are not listening to me, Damon.  I do not want to be saved, not if it means that Klaus is going to kill every person that I love.”

DAMON:  “Get your ass out the door, before I throw you over my shoulder, and carry you out myself.”

Why it made the list:

Elena’s body language is the most intriguing aspect of this scene.  By the time we get to episode 11, we already know how Damon feels for Elena.  He has made his feelings known on more than one occasion.  Yet, while we have gotten inklings of Elena’s sexual attraction to Damon before, never have they been this pronounced.  Watch how Elena inclines her head toward Damon, as if waiting for a kiss.  Watch the passion burn inside of her, as they lock eyes, and she feels the heat from his strong grasp surge through her body.  For the first time, Damon and Elena seem equally engaged in their struggle for emotional, mental, and sexual domination.  He clearly wants it, but, now so does SHE . . .

Let’s not forget, from a mental perspective, that Damon and Elena are both basically there for the SAME reason.  They want to save EACH OTHER from certain death.  In her struggles, Elena is trying desperately to prove to Damon, that she is not just the weak little nyphette, everyone assumes her to be.  She can act rashly, to save the people she loves,  just as easily as Damon can.  D

espite Damon’s words to the contrary, somewhere in those struggles, he begins to see that Elena might actually have a point.  Elena’sMarytr-Like Hero Complex might just directly match up with Damon’s.  And that’s a super hot prospect for both of the parties involved . . .

1. I Put a Spell on You (a.k.a. Damon Tells Elena He Loves Her)

Episode: “Rose” – 2 X 8

Setting the Scene:

Stefan and Damon (but mostly Damon) have just brought Elena back home, after she was kidnapped by Rose and Dead Trevor, and ALMOST re: kidnapped by EEEEEVIL Elijah . . .

During the kidnapping, Elijah removed Elena’s vervain necklace so that he could compel her to tell him where the precious Moonstone was currently hiding.  Somehow, during the staking of Elijah and all the fighting, and vampire fast running, Damon was able to retrieve Elena’s vervain necklace.  And so, Damon’s come through Elena’s window to return it to her . . . but not before he tells her something VERY IMPORTANT!

Potent Quotables:

DAMON:  “I just have to say something . . . Because what I am about to say is probably the most selfish thing I have ever said in my life . . . I just need to say this once.  You just need to hear it.  I love you, Elena.  And it’s because I love you that I can’t be selfish with you.  And why you can’t know this.  I don’t deserve you.  But my brother does. (*He moves to kiss Elena on the lips, rethinks it, and goes for the forehead*) I wish you didn’t have to forget this.  But you do.”

Why it made the list:

Gosh, how could this scene NOT make the list?  It was by far the most beautiful, romantic, enticing, and heartbreaking moments I have ever experienced on television.  I doubt even the staunchest Stelena fans didn’t tear up, as they watched Damon give Elena his heartfelt speech, chastely kiss her on the cheek, and cry softly, as he compeled her to forget the entire life-changing moment.

What’s so ironic about this scene, is that everything Damon says, seems to contradict what’s actually happening on the screen.  Here is Damon saying he’s about to do something selfish.  Yet, by keeping his love for Elena a secret from her, because he feels unworthy of any feelings she might have for him in return, Damon is performing the most selfless act imaginable. 

 Damon tells Elena that he does not deserve her.  And yet, his willingness to give up his own happiness, for her safety, and the happiness of his brother, shows Damon to be more than worthy of Elena’s love.

Time and time again, this season, Damon has reiterated his desire to protect Elena, and keep her safe and happy, above all else.  And if that’s not humanity, embodied in the form of True Love, than humanity simply doesn’t exist . . .

And, there you have it:  My Top Ten Delena Moments of the first half of Season 2.  What were YOURS?

[www.juliekushner.com]

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Filed under Damon and Elena, Delena, Television Super Couples, The Vampire Diaries, Top Ten Lists

Hungry Like the Wolf – A Recap of The Vampire Diaries’ “Bad Moon Rising”

I gotta say, given the build up this whole “Lockwood Curse” has had since the end of last season, Mason’s big drooly “Presto Chango,” this week, was kind of “all bark, no bite,” wasn’t it?  I mean, literally . . . he snarled, he barked . . . he made googly eyes at Tyler, like he was the boy’s “b*tch” (no pun intended).  He just didn’t .  . . you know . . . bite

To be honest, that was a little disappointing.  You see, I thought for SURE that random ho-bag, Amy (who is NOT to be confused with my fabulous blogger pal, who shares the same name, BTW), was a prime candidate to become Dog Meat / win the Senseless Death of the Week Award.

I was wrong . . .

This is not to say that there weren’t ANY fun things about “Bad Moon Rising.”  For example, I thought the “B” plot was quite intriguing . . . or, perhaps, I should call it the D and E plot . . .

I’ll have what SHE’S having . . .

So, without further adieu, what do you say we chain ourselves to our minivans, and bark at the moon?

Or . . . maybe we’ll just get started with the recap, instead?

Return of the “Rick”

Hey, boys and girls!  Guess who’s back with a Brand New Nickname, and a “Useless” New Girlfriend?

Our episode begins with one of TVD’s classic Pow Wows of Sexiness and Plot Explanation.  Said Pow Wow is held, of course, at the typical headquarters for such events, namely, the Salvatore Brothers’ Casa de Rich and Awesome.  Joining our usual trio of attendees to the Pow Wow is Alaric Saltzman, who, suddenly, everyone is referring to as “Rick.”  

This makes Alaric the only character on this show to actually have a nickname (except for Damon, who I sometimes refer to as “My Boyfriend.”)

If you want him, you will have to get through me first . . .

Why did they invite Alaric, you ask?  Because it was the third episode, and the writers figured it was about time Matt Davis had some lines. You see, the Salvatore brothers . . .

 in their infinite wisdom (and insane hotness), recalled that Alaric’s former wife, Isobel

 Known aliases: Elena’s Bio Mom, Heartless Vampire B*tch 

 . . . was a doctoral candidate at Duke University, who studied  “folklore.”  Apparently, said “folklore” didn’t only include vampires.  It also included lycanthropes or, more specifically, werewolves.

Kudos to the writers for providing us a (sort of) explanation here, as to why our favorite Vampire Detective Agency (Stefan and Damon) has been so unbelievably slow in figuring out what the rest of us have known for about half a season now: namely, that the Lockwood’s are, literally, Dirty Dawgs! 

“I’ve been on this planet 160-odd years, and I’ve never seen one.  If werewolves exist, where the hell are they?”  Damon inquires, throwing in a dash of his trademark “Eye Thing” for good measure.

“My mouth may be talking about wolves, but my eyes are TOTALLY undressing Elena, right now . . .”

 And then, just in case his youthful charm and unmatched good looks had made you temporarily forget, Damon chose this moment to remind fans just how OLD of a fogey he really is, by making, not one, but TWO Lon Chaney (Junior and Senior) references, and one Bela Lugosi one.  Now, while I knew that Bela Lugosi was the original Hollywood Vampire . . .

He’s not too bad looking — definitely NO Salvatore brother, though.

  . . . I’ll admit, I had to Google the two Lon Chaneys.  Apparently, the younger one played Wolfman in movies (hence, the reference here).  Also apparently, when he wasn’t in costume . . . Wolfman was actually kind of hot.

The Lost Salvatore Brother?

As for his father . . .

 . . . well, I’m sure he had a really nice personality.

Anyway, recognizing that having werewolves in Mystic Falls would be, in Damon’ words, “not good” for our little Scooby Gang, Damon and Alaric decide to take a trip down to Duke to “borrow” Isobel’s research on the creatures. 

Damon and Alaric:  Together again.  How bromantic!

Meanwhile, Elena, who is desperate to find out why she looks so much like Vampire Katherine, sees Isobel’s research as a possible treasure trove of information on the subject of her doppelganger. 

So, despite the fact that, Damon, the vampire she is desperately attracted to and can’t stop thinking about hates, is going on the trip, Elena decides to tag along.  Unfortunately, for Elena, Stefan  . . .

 . . . has to babysit Baby Vamp Caroline . . .

 . . . and can’t come along.  But that’s OK!  Elena can still use Stefan to make Damon jealous!

OK, Elena.  Now, I actually like the whole “meanspirited-ness” thing you have going on during this episode.  So, I’m going to give you an “A” for effort.  But here’s a little hint:  when you are trying to prove to someone that you are “so over them,” you might want to try .  . . oh. .  . I don’t know .  . . NOT staring longingly at that person, while you are MAKING OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE.  . . just saying.

What Elena was doing . . .

What Elena was thinking . . .

While Elena is OUTSIDE tonguing Stefan and eye-f*cking Damon, Alaric / Rick is inside, hitting on Useless Aunt Jenna .  . .

However, when things get too close for comfort, suddenly Alaric is all “I’m not ready for a relationship.  It’s not you it’s me, blah, blah blah.”

(Honestly, I’m not really sure why we are supposed to CARE about whether Alaric dates Useless Aunt Jenna.  I guess it’s just a way for Alaric to kill time, while he waits for his TRUE LOVE, Damon, to realize that he exists . . .)

Picspam courtesy of http://fyeahteambadass.tumblr.com/

“You hate me, huh?  That sounds like the BEGINNING of a love story, to me . . . not the end of one.”

During the ride to Duke University, a Super Sulky Elena rides in the back, while the Ambiguously Gay Duo, Damon and Alaric, keep the seats warm, up front.  Damon (who clearly feels that one and 1/4 episodes is MORE than enough time to get over someone trying to MURDER YOUR BABY BROTHER) inquires into the current status of Elena’s “forgiveness” of him.  “You know this pretending to hate me thing, is getting a little silly,” jokes Damon, as he aims his best “Eye Thing” into the back seat of Alaric’s car.

When Elena replies with the obvious — that the murder of one’s brother requires a mourning period more substantial than a commercial break —  Damon notes that there is a very big asterisk next to that statement.

Jeremy is still alive.

(Ahhh, Damon.  Between your obscure fogey film references, and your use of archaic grammatical symbols, you really are proving yourself to be elderly today, aren’t you?)

Elena uses this opportunity to pose to Damon the question fans have been pondering since the Season Premiere, namely: Did Damon see the Ugly Ass Ring of Immortality on Jeremy’s finger, before he decided to break the little guy’s neck?

To this inquiry, Damon responds, “Elena, I SAW the ring.  It’s a big tacky thing.  It’s hard to miss!”

THANK YOU, DAMON!  It’s HIGH TIME someone FINALLY noticed how majorly UGLY this ring is!

More Caroline-y than EVER BEFORE!

Speaking of Ugly Ass Rings, is it any wonder that Caroline bitched about the lack of stylishness of her brand new Vampire Sunscreen one?  “I have to wear this ring for the rest of eternity,” whines Caroline.  “Shouldn’t I at least get to choose what it looks like?” 

(Given the Salvatore brothers TERRIBLE taste in jewelry, I’d be inclined to say “Yes, you should, Caroline.”)

But, perhaps, I should backtrack . . .

At the opening of the episode, Caroline is avoiding Matt (who wants to go down to the old Lockwood Swimming Hole for Tyler’s outdoor party) because she can’t go out in the sun, without frying like bacon . . .

Stefan, recognizing that Bonnie’s witchy powers can make a Vampire Sunscreen Ring, and that being with Matt is Caroline’s one link to whatever humanity she has left, tries to convince Bonnie to do the spell.  But Bonnie doesn’t want to do it, because she is a total asshole worried that Caroline will hurt someone again, if allowed to walk in the light. 

(Ummm Bonnie, what time of day did Caroline kill someone last week?  That’s right .  . . AT NIGHT!  And, therefore, you think that not making the ring for your supposed best friend is going to save lives because . . .)

Hello, there, person who is a FEMALE, a MINORITY, and a WITCH.  Perhaps, you’d be interested in learning a thing or two about TOLERANCE of other species  . . .

Ultimately, Bonnie agrees to place a spell on Caroline’s ring, but only after she ANNOYINGLY lectures Caroline about the whole “not killing people” thing, like the lame ass Debbie Downer-witch she’s become.  Then, after instructing Caroline on the importance of preserving all life, Bonnie nonchalantly risks burning Caroline to a crisp, by ripping open the shades to her bedroom, and LETTING THE SUNSHINE IN!

Keep smiling, and shining, knowing you can always count on me, for sure . . . that’s what friends are for!

Once Caroline is cleared for Sun Worship, Papa Stefan (ever the understanding parent) allows her to attend Tyler’s party, provided she feed on bunnies with him first . . .

“You don’t want to eat ME, do you Caroline?  Might I interest you in some Tasty B*tchy Bonnie-witch, instead?”

When a stressed-out Caroline unloads all her neuroses on poor Stefan, during their morning hunt, he notes wryly that “when someone becomes a vampire, all their natural personality traits are amplified.” (NEW VAMPIRE RULE ALERT!)

Upon hearing this, Caroline correctly notes that she will now be an “insecure, neurotic, control freak on crack.”  And, to prove her point, when Caroline reunites with Matt at the Swimming Hole, she goes BALLISTIC on Slutty Amy, for flirting with her man. 

Matt . . .

 . . . far from being turned on by the sheer extent of her girlfriend’s devotion, stomps away from Uber Possessive Caroline in a pouty huff.

Meanwhile, Tyler . . .

. . . has become suspicious of Uncle Mason, after seeing the latter lurking around an old underground “slave cellar.”  It is this suspicion, perhaps, that causes him to ignore Uncle Mason’s warning that it’s a Full Moon. And if Tyler doesn’t get all his friends off the property by nightfall, “someone will wind up wasted, and dead at the bottom of the lake.”

(Well . . . that pretty much sounds like every horror movie, I have EVER SEEN!)

“Pull it out, Baby!  It hurts (SO GOOD)!”

Over at Duke University, Isobel must have been pretty darn important, because her office looks like a Mansion / Ancient Artifact Museum.  And her old student / assistant, Vanessa . . .

(played by Courtney Ford)

 . . . seems literally willing to guard the place with her life.  Moments after the gang arrives, Vanessa shoots a crossbow in Damon’s and Elena’s direction.  The immortal Damon gallantly steps forward to take the proverbial “bullet” on Elena’s behalf.  While Alaric struggles to disarm Courtney, Damon and Elena engage in a thinly veiled sexual conversation over the phallic arrow lodged beneath the muscle fibers of Damon’s perfect abdominals . . .

 Yummy!

“Pull it out!  Pull the damn thing out!  It hurts so goodYES!  YES!  YES!” Damon whines, as Elena straddles him, rocks back and forth a bit, and, finally, breathing heavily, yanks the big stick out of his midsection. 

(Thank you for this, writers.  Clearly, you know how to give this Pervy Fangirl EXACTLY what she wants, while still sticking to your TV-14 rating.)

Watching this scene, I couldn’t help but be reminded of another vampire / human encounter on television.  This one also involved a morally ambiguous vamp “taking a bullet” for an ambivalent human female, and forcing said female to bodily remove the offending weapon from the vampire’s body . . .

I’m referring, of course, to the scene in True Blood, during Season 2.  In that scene, Eric tricked Sookie into sucking a bullet from his stomach, so that she would be forced to swallow his blood, and, thereby, be bonded to him forever . . .

“That b*tch i SOOOO DEAD!”  Damon remarks, referring to the woman who just crossbowed him.

“If you kill her, I will never talk to you again,” threatens Elena, childishly.

“You are starting to manipulate me,” Damon notes wryly.

“And I LOVE being manipulated.  Just ask Vampire Katherine . . .”

When Vanessa has calmed down enough for Alaric to unhand her, the grad student admits that, having reviewed Isobel’s research, she freaked upon running into the Definitely Dead Damon Salvatore, and Elena, a girl who LOOKED just like Vampire Katherine. 

Later, as the crew begins poring through boxes of Isobel’s research, Elena and Vanessa bond over boys and vervain plants.  “He is a first rate, jackass,” Elena whispers to Vanessa, looking over her shoulder at Damon.

Damon overhears and smiles.

“So THAT’S the pet name she plans to call me, when we’re doing the NASTY, tonight!  Daddy LIKE!”

Later, Damon sidles up to Elena to continue their Flirt Fest 2010.  “It’s a bummer we aren’t friends anymore, because I could tell you what I know,” he coos.

“Now who’s manipulating?”  Elena replies, trying to hide the smirk on her face.

Mental F*cking = all of the heat, none of the STDS!

Unfortunately, Vanessa has to ruin all the fun, by launching into a seemingly endless monologue of Plot Explanation Sans Sexiness, which seems to be the only purpose, thus far, for her character being on this show.  Vanessa explains to us that some Aztec curse made vampires Creatures of the Night, and werewolves Servants of the Moon.  She also describes the two species as mortal enemies.  “According to legend, a werewolf bite can kill a vampire,” remarks Vanessa. 

(And what exactly does it do to humans?  Turn them into wolves?  Give them a gnarly tattoo?  I guess we will find out soon enough . . .)

The “Serious” Vampire Look

While Elena and Damon are flirting over at Duke, Stefan and Caroline seem to be flirting with one another, back home.  Just as Stefan teased Caroline earlier about her neuroses, Caroline playfully taunts Stefan about his excessive seriousness, and the  stern looks he keeps giving Mason, at the swimming hole.  And I’ll be darned if the friendly teasing doesn’t cause the usually Serious Stefan to crack a smile or two.

Eventually, however, Caroline runs off to find Boy Toy Matt.

Apologizing for her earlier bad behavior, Caroline promises her beau “no more drama,” and then pulls him into the woods for a substantial makeout session, under the light of the Full Moon.

While the pair are going at it, Stefan receives a call from Elena, in which she relays to him the information she uncovered about werewolves, and the unique brand of danger they pose to vampires.  Ever the concerned Papa, Stefan rushes off to protect Caroline.

Meanwhile, Tyler is in the woods making out with Slutty Amy, a.k.a. Boy Toy Matt’s Sloppy Seconds.  Apparently, the girl had taken Caroline’s mind control command to “go after someone single” literally.  To Tyler’s credit, when Slutty Amy awakens from her compulsion, and ditches Tyler’s ass, he doesn’t go into a rage, like Season 1 Tyler would probably do. 

(I guess the writers are trying to make this Teen Wolf more likeable, after all . . .)

“Oh, come on!  How could you NOT like me?  I wear pajamas to my own keggar!  Now, if that doesn’t make me a Loveable Dork, I don’t know what does!”

Down in the underground cellar, Mason has chained himself to some rocks, to protect Tyler and his friends from his Wolfy Wrath.  However, upon hearing his cousin’s voice above ground, Mason decides to relocate . . . to also ABOVE GROUND.  Mason eventually chains himself to his van . . . which to me seems like THE DUMBEST IDEA EVER! 

So let me get this straight . . . you were concerned about hurting the teens located MANY FEET ABOVE YOU.  So, you decided to . . . come to ground level and be CLOSER TO THEM? 

“If this car’s a rockin, don’t come a knockin'”

When the Full Moon finally hits the sky two things happen that should surprise presisely NO ONE. (1) Caroline vamps out on Matt and tries to eat him; (2) and Mason, upon turning wolf, breaks free of the chains attaching him to his van.

DUH!

Fortunately, two more FAIRLY predictable things happen, to prevent anyone from getting hurt:  (1) Stefan tackles Caroline to the ground, before she has a chance to finish her Matt Sandwich;

“This is me, playing the HERO again .  . . and looking Super Sexy in my Hoodie of Hedonism.”

and (2) Tyler stares down Wolfy Mason, preventing him from attacking Stefan and Caroline.

“This is ME, doing my Endzone Dance, because my character is FINALLY relatively sympathetic.”

When it is all over, Tyler confronts a VERY DIRTY and VERY NAKED (but still tasty) Mason about his wolfishness (See picture above).  Nearby, Caroline compels Matt to forget that she ate him.  Stefan then gives him vervain, to protect him from being a future Snack de Caroline. 

Then, Papa and Baby Vamp engage in a conversation about the difficulties associated with protecting the humans they love from their own vampiric darksides.  Following that conversation, Caroline purposefully ruins her relationship with Matt, in order to protect him from her.

To see her break down in tears after Matt dumped her immortal butt was truly heartbreaking.  In making this decision, Caroline has performed a truly selfless act, one that not even the Saintly Stefan was capable of accomplishing.  The question is . . . now that she no longer has Matt to keep her on the straight and narrow, where will Caroline find that ever important link to her humanity?

“Hint:  It sure as hell won’t be from ME!”

Vampire Katherine’s arrival in Caroline’s room at the end of the episode, followed by her threatening, yet intriguing pronouncement — “Don’t be frightened.   We are going to have so much fun together!” — certainly didn’t bode well for the future of Vampire Caroline’s soul . . .

The Darker Side of Elena

After a lame-o scene, during which Alaric makes Useless Aunt Jenna his official Lame Ladyfriend, we are returned to the MAIN EVENT . . .

Upon arriving home from Duke University, Damon corners Elena, once again, by the car door.  Their mutually beautiful faces are just inches away from locking lips. 

“Road trips work well for us,” remarks Damon, glibly.  “You know I chipped away at your Wall of Hatred.”

A scene from Damon and Elena’s FIRST road trip.  Ahhh, memories!

Throughout most of the Duke trip, Elena has been trying to get Damon to spill the information he has on Vampire Katherine — information that, hopefully, can help Elena understand why she looks so much like her.  “Friends don’t manipulate friends,” Elena mutters, early on in the trip, when Damon, once again refuses to share.

And yet, at the end of the night, Damon is feeling remarkably generous.  Sensing some softening in Elena’s resolve against him, he tells her that Katherine’s last name was “Petrova,” and hands her a book on the Petrova lineage.  “Men snoop too, you know,” he says slyly.

But then, he becomes serious . . .

“You have every right to hate me.  I understand.  But you hated me before, and we became friends.  It would suck if it was gone forever.  Is it is it gone forever?”

Of course, it’s not gone forever.  I LOVE YOU, you Big Fangy Lug!  Thank you for the book, Damon,” Elena replies, demurely.

And that’s when Elena finally works up the courage to ask Damon directly the question that has been plaguing us all.  “Did you know Jeremy was wearing the ring, when you broke his neck?”

Damon admits that he didn’t.

NOOOOOOOOOOOO!  (I still refuse to believe it.)

Elena tears up at the admission, but thanks Damon for being honest.  “You have lost me forever,” she whispers.

NOOOOOOOO! (I refuse to believe THAT too!)

Now, it is Damon’s turn to be hurt and angered.  “You knew that already.  You used me today.  I thought friends didn’t manipulate friends,” he says, throwing Elena’s own words from earlier in the evening back in her face.

But Damon knows the unspoken response to that too.  Elena was OK with manipulating Damon, because she doesn’t consider him a friend .  . . not anymore.

“You and Katherine have a lot more in common than just your looks,” remarks Damon, before walking away.

She TOTALLY deserved that.

Don’t worry, Damon.  You’ll get her back, eventually.  Sexy television characters, like you, are ALWAYS forgiven for your evils.  So, for now, just go back to La Casa de Rich and Awesome.  Relax.  Pour yourself a drink . . .

or TEN . . .

Be sure to practice your trademark “Eye Thing” in front of the mirror . . .

Tomorrow is another day . . .

[www.juliekushner.com]

 

 

 

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