Tag Archives: Ben McKittrick

The Good, The Bad, and The Zombies – A Vampire Diaries Recap of “Fool Me Once”

There must be something in the water in TV Land this week. On Tuesday’s episode of Lost, there was much talk of “zombies.” Actually, the Lost zombies were not exactly of the “eat brains” variety.  Rather, they fell more into the “spiritually empty” realm of zombie-ism.  But they were zombies, nonetheless.

“On second thought . . . eating brains would be a really good way to reduce my carb intake.”

The “zombies” in tonight’s episode of The Vampire Diaries, however, were a bit more literal-minded. These entombed undead bloodsuckers certainly looked the part, with their vacant stares, cob-webbed attire, and skin falling-offy faces.

“Fool Me Once” was not exactly The Vampire Diaries’ prettiest episode, nor its strongest. There was a lot of bad and ugly here, and not all of it included Katherine’s decrepit, centuries-old, friends.  But there were definitely some highpoints to this, the last episode of the series, before it goes  on a month-long hiatus. So, without further adieu, let us separate the dead from the undead, shall we?

“Living” it Up in Motel Vampire

The episode begins with Elena waking up in a shabby motel room, to find vigilant Vampire Ben McKittrick holding her captive.  Or, at least, he would be vigilant, if he wasn’t fast asleep. A frightened Elena tiptoes toward the door. As you watch her, you just know Hot Bartender Vamp is going to jump out, give her a scare, and prevent her from leaving (the “fake escape,” is, after all, the oldest trick in the horror movie book).

When Ben does jump out for the obligatory scare, he tries to compel Elena to stay captive, by using that mind bendy thing they showed in the trailer. Of course, that ended up being a tease. Elena is still wearing her vervain necklace at the time, and, therefore, is immune to his “charms.”

Creepy Stalker Vamp Anna then jumps out and scolds Ben for his stupidity.  And, I have to say, given that they used such a hot actor to play Ben, I was a bit disappointed with the blandness of his two-episode character arc. (Stefan literally torched Hot Bartender Vamp at the end of this episode, so I’m pretty sure he’s gone for good.) Granted, The Vampire Diaries already has its share of sexy and brooding bad boys, but I think Ben had the potential to be more than Anna’s bumbling sidekick.

“I coulda been a contendah!”

Anyway, after suffering through what was officially the worst date ever, Bonnie is stuck slumming it in Motel De Vamp too. As it turns out, Vampire Anna has decided to use Elena and Bonnie as bait to get the Grinimore from Stefan.  (Is it just me, or is Elena used as “bait” in every single episode?)

With the help of Bonnie’s Witchy Grandma, Stefan finds the motel where Elena and Bonnie are being held captive, and rescues them by performing the heroic act of . . . wait for it . . . opening the window shades. Yeah, apparently, unlike Stefan, Damon, and Anna, D-list Vampire Ben not only cannot venture out doors during daylight, he cannot experience any sunlight whatsoever.

Back safe and sound at Witchy Grandma’s house, the Scooby Gang decides to help Damon to open the tomb, if only to get Creepy Stalker Vampire and her various D-list minions off their back. There is one problem with this.  After having been betrayed by the Scooby Gang in the last episode, Damon basically hates their guts . . . Elena offers to take one for the team, and reestablish with Damon the trust that has been broken between them.

“WOO HOO! YIPPEE! An Elena and Damon scene! I knew there was a reason I watched this show . . .”

It’s Just a Matter of Trust and Fashion Facilitation

One of the worst things about being single (for me anyway), is that there is no one there to help you unzip your dresses and secure the clasps on your bracelets and necklaces. Clearly, Elena Gilbert will never have this problem. In what was, of course, my favorite scene of the evening. Elena comes to Damon with her tail between her legs, ready to grovel.

Elena recognizes that Damon was more hurt by Elena’s betrayal at the cemetery last week than Stefan’s, due to the special connection these two have with one another. “You and I have something,” Elena explains, using as evidence the fact that Damon chose not to compel her when the two went down to Georgia together a couple of episodes ago.

“Who says, I didn’t,” challenges Damon, who gets some glee at seeing Elena flinch at his remark.

In a bold move to earn his respect and trust, Elena removes her vervain necklace, allowing Damon total control over her. Touched by the gesture, Damon moves toward her and takes the necklace. However, instead of tossing it away, he gently reattaches it to Elena’s neck. “I didn’t compel you in Atlanta, because we were having fun.  And I wanted it to be real.  I am trusting you.  Don’t make me regret it,” whispers Damon in Elena’s ear.

Wow . . . Please excuse me for a moment, while I wipe the drool off my keyboard . . .

The Lamest Party Ever

“Hey, what do you say we play a rollicking game of bingo when we get home?”

Remember shows like The O.C., where there was a party in every episode, and at every party there was at least one fight and one drug overdose? I do, and for that reason, I was massively disappointed by “Duke’s Cemetery Party.” After all, we had all the makings for a truly awesome party here.

For starters, it was at a cemetery filled with vampires.  Second, Tyler was there! And he likes to beat everyone up! Third, Jeremy was there! And he used to like to get wasted ALL THE TIME! Finally, new couple Matt and Caroline were there! Surely, I can count on them for some heavy petting and steamy necking.

What did I get instead? Tyler lecturing Jeremy about how he used to “be cool.” Jeremy moping around in the corner, mooning over Anna.  Sure, Vampire Ben ended up punching Jeremy’s lights out.  But it wasn’t nearly as much fun to watch as you would think.

And how about our hot new love couple: Matt and Caroline? Did they spend the episode heating up the screen with their newfound passion for one another? Not exactly. Instead, they made “Speeches” to each other and had in-depth philosophical conversations about how to make their relationship work. I  felt as though I had inadvertently changed channels away from my hot and sexy teen drama and, had instead found a talk show starring him . . .

This couple showed a lot of promise with their adorably sexy “car kiss” at the end of last weeks episode. However, the fact that they are already psychoanalyzing one another during the second week of their relationship, doesn’t bode well for them . . . AT ALL!

In Other, More Exciting, News . . .

Back at the tomb, Bonnie and her Grandma successfully complete the spell that will open the gates to Vampireland. Damon enters the tomb with Elena, who is accompanying him as, you guessed it, bait. You see, Damon fears that, without Elena, the witches will burn the tomb down with him still inside it. And we soon find out, that’s exactly what Granny plans to do.

When Vampire Anna rushes in after Damon to retrieve her Mommy, Grandma explains to Bonnie that the spell they cast will allow anyone to enter the tomb, but only humans, like Elena, to exit. While Damon is searching for Katherine, Anna finds her now Crypt Keeper-esque Mommy and tries to feed Elena to her. Elena screams out, causing Stefan to run to her rescue.

Now that a vampire they actually like is stuck in the tomb, Bonnie and Grandma are forced to open it for real. When they do, Anna and her mother rush out, as do Stefan and Elena. Unfortunately, an increasingly frantic Damon is still inside searching for Katherine.  Stefan returns to the tomb and drags a reluctant Damon out seconds before it closes.

Anna confesses to a heartbroken Damon that she always knew Katherine wasn’t in that tomb. Apparently, Anna had run into Katherine a few years back, and the latter seemed to have no intention of finding Damon again.  In a surprisingly sweet scene, Stefan returns home with Damon to comfort him over his heartbreak.

The Vampire Diaries = Ageist?

Back at La Casa de Bonnie, Grandma isn’t looking so hot. It seems that this evening of staying up late and casting spells has taken its toll on her.  When Bonnie leaves the room to get her grandmother tea, she returns to find her dead.

This really dusts my doilies! After all, Grandma was the only sensible non-vampire adult in the whole show (unless you count Jenna and Alaric, which I don’t). Not only was she smart, but she was tough as nails. After all, she beat the crap out of Damon using only her mind!Am I supposed to believe that a hardcore witch like this would meet her demise as a result of merely muttering a few words in Latin? Come on The Vampire Diaries, don’t you realize that old people can be fun? Haven’t you ever seen The Golden Girls?

. . or that awesome Snickers Superbowl commercial starring Betty White?

But I digress.  After a few heart-wrenching moments of mourning dear old Grandma, we return to the infamous tomb, which turns out to be not-so-much closed, as a zombie-esque decrepit dude finds out when he merely pushes lightly on the door . . .

Personally, I would have liked to see all the zombies emerge and do The Thriller dance here, because that would have been awesome.  But no such luck . . .

Well, there you have it folks . . . See you on March 25th!

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Who knew the Civil War could be so sexy? A Vampire Diaries Recap for “Children of the Damned”

 

This may make me sound vapid and un-intellectual, but I am the complete opposite of a history buff.  When it came to studying the past in school, I was always of the admittedly shallow mindset that if something happened before my grandparents were born, it simply wasn’t worth my time. 

Of all “pre-Grandma” time periods, I always hated learning about the Civil War the most.  The endless list of seemingly identical battles to memorize, all those pictures of stony-faced, heavily-bearded generals, the astounding lack of women mentioned . . . ummm . . . anywhere at all –  it all put me right to sleep.

(Wake me up when we get to the Depression . . .)

Thus, admittedly, when I saw the previews for this week’s installment of The Vampire Diaries, with all my favorite characters clad in ill-fitting, decidedly unsexy and archaic garb, I was less than thrilled.  After all, I like my Damon Salvatore in leather, or shirtless (preferably shirtless) — not in some starched up and stiff button-down shirt with suspenders. 

(All dressed with no leather makes Damon a dull boy . . . and Julie a sad girl.)

However, I found myself pleasantly surprised by how much fun “Children of the Damned” actually was.  Fun and important, in that it dispelled a common misconception (Katherine was NOT responsible for turning the Salvatore brothers)  and gave some crucial insight into the main motivations of our favorite characters (Damon is at least somewhat justified in being royally pissed at Stefan in the present day.)

(Oh Vampire Diaries, you have shown me the Civil War light!  Wait . . . did they even have bulbs back then?)

So, without further adieu, let’s begin our history lesson:

In the Past . . .

The episode opens with “damsel in distress” Elena’s undead doppelganger, Katherine, begging the driver of a stagecoach for help for her “sick husband.”  However, when the driver stops to provide assistance, Katherine gets all vamped out and attacks his ass, while a surprisingly innocent looking and still-living Damon looks on in horror.  Turned on from the hunt, Katherine begins to make out with Damon, who complies and politely refrains from saying, “No way, you Pointy-Toothed Biatch, not until you wash that driver off your face!”

Meanwhile, Elena’s ancestor, Jonathan Gilbert (or perhaps another Mystic Falls resident . . . it is a bit unclear) is handing off the Grinimore (which turns out to be another name for Witch Emily’s spell book) to Damon and Stefan’s daddy for safe keeping.  It appears that the Civil War era residents are gearing up to kick some major vampire ass (or burn them up in a church, whichever is faster), and the Grinimore plays a key role in this.  We also learn that Mystic Falls’ founder, Honoraria Fell, has outfitted some of the living residents of the town with vervain to protect them from the vampires’ powers.

Apparently, all Gilberts possess a gene for vampire loving.  Like Elena and Jeremy after him, Jonathan appears to have fallen for the undead Pearl. To make matters even more complicated, Pearl just so happens to be the mother of Anna, the creepy stalker vampire who has been following Jeremy around in the present, in order to retrieve Jonathan Gilbert’s diary.  Like Stefan and Damon, at this point in the past, Anna does not appear to have turned vamp yet.

Katherine is just having the time of her death, toying with and alternately screwing Damon and Stefan, both of whom she plans to change into vampires in the near future.  This way, she can have her boy toys and eat them too . . . forever.  Because sex with the bloodsucker tends to be pretty darn hot, Damon and Stefan are understandably miffed that their father is leading the effort to destroy all vampires.  Naïve Stefan expresses to Damon his bright idea of informing their dear old dad about their relationship with Katherine, reasoning that doing so would save the vampires from destruction.  To this Damon replies, “What are you out of your f*&^*ing mind, you dumb f*&*ing asshole?”  (or at least he would have said that, if he was on HBO, instead of the CW).

(Not on this channel, buddy!)

Despite Damon’s warnings, Stefan confronts his dad indirectly, explaining that not all vampires are “bad people” (or people at all, for that matter).  Daddy Salvatore seems moderately understanding but is generally unreceptive to Stefan’s arguments.  Later, while Stefan is doing the horizontal mambo with Katherine, she suddenly goes all fangy and moves to bite him.  When she does, however, she becomes instantly sick and falls to the ground.  It appears that Stefan has ingested vervain at some point prior to the sex act.  Poison  = a major turnoff for vamps.  “The mood” is officially as dead as Katherine.

While Katherine is writhing in pain, Daddy Salvatore pops in and muzzles the vamp like a wild animal. Papa explains to Stefan that he figured out that Katherine was a vampire based on Stefan’s sudden change of heart toward the undead species.  Katherine is then dragged out toward the church of her eventual doom, along with 25 other vampires. One of these vampires is Pearl, who is turned in by her Benedict Arnold boyfriend Jonathan Gilbert, after his vampire-pointing pocket watch goes crazy in Pearl’s presence.

Damon curses Stefan for his involvement in Katherine’s demise, and runs away in anguish.  Meanwhile, Anna and Witch Emily watch the scene in horror.  Witch Emily turns to Anna and promises to do a spell to protect the vampires.  She also assures Anna that she will one day be reunited with her mother . . .

The Present . . .

Speaking of shirtless, we join the present day in bed with Stefan and Elena.  Suffice it to say that the former has drool worthy-washboard abs that made this whole scene worth it for me.  To make things even hotter, Damon intrudes on the scene, and I again wish I was watching HBO, so that I could have the opportunity to witness the best threesome ever.  But alas, this is basic cable and nothing happens . . .

(“I’m not a smart man, but I KNOW what ménage a trois is . . . and I have them all the time.”)

Instead, Damon commandeers the couple to help him obtain Jonathan Gilbert’s diary, which he believes will detail the location of the Grinimore.  After a conversation with Jeremy, the crew learns that Alaric Saltzman currently has the diary.  Now, the Salvatore gang must race with Anna to retrieve it. 

Alaric is studying the diary when he is confronted by Stefan, who he shoots with a wooden stake gun, but misses.  Alaric confesses to Stefan that he knows that Damon killed his wife, but her body was never found.  The history teacher admits that he has come to Mystic Falls to find out exactly what happened to the love of his life.  When Stefan and Alaric turn their attention back to the sacred ancestral diary, it is gone . . . It appears, the while the boys were gossiping like little school girls, Bad Ass Anna was taking action.  Fortunately, Stefan is able to get a copy of the diary for himself.

Meanwhile, hot newbie vamp, Ben McKittrick, is out on a date with Bonnie to try to get information out of her about the Grinimore.  Believe it or not, Bonnie gets her wish from last episode, and these two actually spend their first date doing karaoke.  Unfortunately, we don’t get to see it.  However, based on the pair’s discussions about the evening, we can surmise that Ben probably sounded a lot like this . . .

Bonnie and Ben get flirty and the former moves in for a smooch, but backs away when her witch Spidey Sense gets a distinct vampire vibe from the hottie.  Sensing he has been found out, Ben attacks Bonnie and foreplay is officially over . . .

Meanwhile, Elena and Stefan are reviewing Jonathan Gilbert’s diary to no avail, when Stefan conveniently remembers a conversation he had with his dad, during which the latter explained that he would take all of his darkest secrets to his grave.  The pair head to the cemetery to exhume Papa Salvatore’s body and retrieve the Grinimore hidden in there.  Damon finds the couple at the gravesite, and concludes that both Elena and Stefan had lied to him about their willingness to help him to find the Grinimore and rescue Katherine. 

Damon seems genuinely hurt by Elena’s betrayal, in particular, as she was the only one he truly trusted.  In anger, he grabs Katherine’s present-day doppelganger, slits his wrist, and force feeds her his blood.  He then threatens that if Stefan does not turn over the spell book, Damon will turn Elena into a vampire.  Stuck between a rock and a fang place, Stefan reluctantly tosses the sacred book to his once-again estranged brother.

A defeated Elena and Stefan then head back to Elena’s house.  Once there, Stefan learns, to his chagrin, that Glutton-for-Punishment Jeremy has invited Psycho Vamp Anna into the Gilbert home.  Soon after, Elena goes missing . . .

Well, there you have it, “Children of the Damned” in a nutshell.  Tune in next week, when Hottie Vamp McKittrick uses his mind control powers on Elena, and an angry Damon wishes our female protagonist dead in order to achieve the ultimate vengeance on his brother.

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