Tag Archives: Cardio God

Separating the Men (and the Women) from the Babies – A Recap of Grey’s Anatomy’s “Hook Line and Sinner”

This week’s installment of Grey’s Anatomy was all about making choices.  The episode also featured a lot of “baby talk” . . .

  . . . and not nearly enough shirtlessness and/or sex for my taste . . .

A Shirtless Justin Chambers is a TERRIBLE thing to waste!

As is a Shirtless Jesse Williams, for that matter!

What choices did our characters make this week?  Let’s analyze, shall we?

To Grandpa, or Not to Grandpa . . .

In the past, Mark Sloan has been known throughout Seattle Grace as the Resident Man Child, a walking Mid-Life Crisis in Scrubs, if you will.  The moments he wasn’t in the operating room (and, let’s face it, we almost NEVER see this guy operate), Mark could typically be found trolling for women . . . .

 . . . making sexually suggestive (and slightly creepy) comments to anyone who would listen,

“Hey baby, did I ever tell you about the big yacht I own?  It’s IN MY PANTS!”

 . . . and starring in sex tapes with actresses and call girls . . .

(Oh, wait . . . that last one only happened in REAL life)

However, lately, viewers have begun to notice a “softer side” of Mark Sloan.  During the last few episodes, Mark has been toying with the idea of settling  into a serious relationship, and starting a family.  This idea was first brought to the forefront a few episodes back, when Mark’s long lost 18-year old daughter, who he heretofore never knew existed, arrived on the scene and announced she was pregnant.

Mark and his daughter (Little Sloan) had previously discussed Mark raising his grandchild on his daughter’s behalf.  However, Little Sloan got cold feet, and decided to put the baby up for adoption.  In the opening scenes of this episode, Little Sloan arrives on Mark’s doorstep about to give birth.   Fortunately for Little Sloan, Mark lives in Doctor Central.   So, she didn’t even need to go to the hospital to deliver her baby.   Dr. Teddy Altman . . .

 . . . (who Sloan just so happened to be screwing, while his daughter’s water was breaking all over his Welcome Mat), delivered the child, with nothing more than a pair of scissors and a bunch of towels.  Once the baby was born, a highly hormonal Little Sloan began to have second thoughts about giving it up for adoption. 

And despite the fact that Little Sloan had Bad Mommy written all over her (Her idea of “baby gifts” was a messy purse filled with enough lame dollar store doodads to LITERALLY choke a baby!  These “bite-sized” toys might as well have had “Swallow Me and Die” written on their surfaces), Big Sloan seemed to think it was a GREAT idea!  He was thrilled at the prospect of being able to have a grandchild in his life.  Fortunately, Arizona stepped in to show him the error of his ways. 

In a heart-wrenching scene, Mark is forced to hand the child over to his new adoptive parents.  Once it is all over, he and his daughter vow to remain a part of one another’s lives.  So, it seems as though Seattle Grace’s most immature resident may have FINALLY grown up.  (Oh, and did I mention that Little Sloan was significantly less annoying this week, than she has been in past episodes?)

Oh Baby or No Baby . . .

Speaking of Arizona . . .

 . . . she and Callie seemed to be having baby issues of their own this week, since Callie wants to have a child, and Arizona doesn’t.  Throughout the episode, Callie tried a number of tactics to get Arizona aboard the Baby Train.

First Callie tried guided imagery.  “Picture a beautiful baby,” she prodded.

“I’m picturing a trip to Spain, a glass of Sangria, and you in a bikini,” replied Arizona.  “Oh, wait.   We can’t go to Spain . . . or DRINK, because of the BABY!”

Callie then tried to psychoanalyze Arizona, patronizingly explaining to her that the real reason Arizona didn’t want a child was that she was afraid it would get sick and die, like Arizona’s own brother, or the babies she treats at the hospital each day.  Arizona is offended by Callie’s insinuations.  “I’m not broken.   . .  I just don’t want a child,” Arizona explains, before storming out of the room.

And even though the couple seemingly made up at the episode’s conclusion, I am not entirely sure that this is something they will be able to overcome, in the long term.

To Be a D-Bag, or NOT to be a D-Bag . . .

Remember all those times, when Seattle Grace was in financial trouble, and Derek self-righteously lectured Chief Webber on the importance of not letting the interests of money and prestige override the need for a comfortable work environment, where doctors can work together as a team?  Remember that “Back to School” episide, where Derek tried to demonstrate that Seattle Grace was, above all, a “teaching hospital”?  Well, it appears, that “power corrupts,” because the Derek of this week’s episode has completely turned his back on everything he once believed.

For what seemed like the umpteenth time in the past few seasons, ANOTHER “Cardio God” entered the hallowed halls of Seattle Grace.  And, once again, the typically tough-as-nails, Cristina Yang, turned into a puddle of sycophantic mush around him.  Karev was right when he said she treated well-renown doctors like trading cards . . .

Collect them all!

At least Cristina is not afraid to ADMIT her flaws.  (I loved when she called herself a Cardiothoracic Whore!)  This, unfortunately, is more than I can say for Derek . . . 

Apparently, Seattle Grace is still in need of a Head of Cardiologogy.  And while, Teddy, who has been performing the job on temporary contract, would seem to be the most likely choice for the job, the prospect of getting a bigger name (in this case, “Dr. Evans”) to fill the position, put dollar signs in McDreamy’s puppy dog eyes.

In Derek’s defense, a skittish Teddy was screwing up all over the place, this week, sneezing on patients and failing to recognize that they were suffering from sepsis, before operating on them.  And, yes, the DULL Dr. Evans did seem like a “good surgeon.”  However, he was a Crappy Teacher, forcing Cristina to sit on the sidelines and watch a surgery she had scrubbed in on, while he performed the entire thing on his own.  Not to mention that the absence of the well-liked Teddy would have certainly caused a good deal of upheaval amongst many of the doctors — most notably, Mark Sloan who she is currently screwing.  Under normal circumstances, a doctor’s popularity and good teaching skills should not be the sole reasons for her getting a job.  However, for a Chief who got HIS job on a platform of “education and togetherness,” such reasons should certainly be persuasive ones.

Fortunately, for Teddy, she ultimately got to keep her job.  However, at the end of the episode, when Old Chief Webber makes a point to congratulate Shepherd on his decision to award loyalty over prestige, Derek defiantly admits that he had originally offered Dr. Evans the job, not Teddy.  However, Dr. Evans passed on it.  I’m not a fan of what “chiefing” is doing to Derek’s character  . . . Here’s hoping that Old Chief Webber resumes his post REALLY SOON!

“Sober up quick, Chief McBoozy!  We need YOU!”

To Threesome, or Not to Threesome . .  .

In other D-baggyish news, Owen came VERY close to cheating on Cristina, by almost making out with a vulnerable Teddy, in an admittedly sweet elevator scene.  Interestingly enough, THESE actions are NOT the ones with which I take issue.  After all, Owen ultimately DID NOT cheat (only because his pager went off . . . but still).  And, Owen and Teddy do have chemistry and a strong history together, so I can understand his moment of weakness. 

What I COULD NOT abide, was what Owen did NEXT.  In a highly uncharacteristic move, Cristina plays the Girlfriend Card with Owen, asking that he plead Teddy’s case to McDreamy, so she can keep her job.  Owen AGREES to do this.  However, once he gets inside the Chief’s office, he pleads DR. EVANS’s case instead, asserting that Teddy would be “just fine” if Derek didn’t choose her for the position.  One could argue that Owen truly believed that Dr. Evan was the “better man” for the job.  However, I think this had more to do with Owen’s own concerns that he won’t be strong enough to not make out with Teddy, the next time the two of them are stuck in an elevator . . .  And, if that ‘s the case, that seriously SUCKS for BOTH Teddy and Cristina!

To Grow Some Balls or NOT to Grow Some Balls . . .

In still MORE D-bag news, Alex treated his sort-of girlfriend Lexie like total crap this entire episode, berating her, making fun of her, and STEALING her surgeries.  When Lexie solves a medical mystery and ALMOST allows Alex to steal her thunder, it takes a tough love speech from Bailey (Doesn’t it always?), for Lexie to finally realize that she is being mistreated.  At the end of the episode, Lexie confronts Alex, by giving him a serious “I AM WOMAN, HEAR ME ROAR” – type talking to. 

Alex seems impressed.  He even gives Lexie a beer.  And you KNOW how boys hate parting with their beer.  But was it too little, to late?

Finally, in Bat-Sh&t Crazy News . . .

 . . . April continued to awkwardly fawn over the married Dr. Shepherd, much like the creepy school girl she played in that Glee episode a few months back . . .

I LOVED how Dr. Avery, a.k.a. Dr. Hotness . . .

 . . . totally called her out on her freak show behavior, not to mention skewered her with a few spot on impersonations.  “Oh, Chief Shepherd, you can spank me if I’m wrong. And I DO hope I’m wrong!”  He mimicked.

(Could somebody in the writing staff PLEASE give the funny and adorably sexy Jesse Williams more to do on this show?  A storyline?  A relationship?  A surgery?  ANYTHING AT ALL?  Need I remind you what he looks like with his shirt off?)

Anyway, methinks the slow boil of Bat Sh&t Crazy April is about to bubble over REALLY soon.  So, Derek should definitely hide his meat cleavers  . . .

 . . . and his BUNNIES . . .

 . . . both in the literal AND the metaphoric sense.  You can spank me if I’m wrong.  And I DO hope I’m wrong . . .

 

 

 

 

5 Comments

Filed under Grey's Anatomy

All Work and No Play (Well, Maybe Some Play . . .) – A Grey’s Anatomy Recap

                So, I was all set to do this recap, when it occurred to me that I didn’t know what this episode was called.  The TV.com Episode Guide actually lists Thursday’s Grey’s Anatomy episode title as “I Like You So Much Better When You’re Naked.”  Seriously?   Is that not the longest episode title you have ever seen?  Even if you boil it down to its initials (as recappers and fangirls tend to do), it is reduced merely to the highly unwieldy ILYSMBWYN.

             And yet, the title, untenable as it may be, pretty accurately describes how I generally feel about Grey’s Anatomy.  Because, honestly, who really watches Grey’s for the medical stuff?  We used to have ER for that.  Now, I guess we have that Mercy show . . .

            If I had my druthers, McDreamy and Karev would be out of their scrubs way more often than in them.  That being said, I was genuinely surprised at how much I enjoyed this installment of Grey’s Anatomy, particularly seeing as it contained virtually no nudity at all, and focused almost entirely on the career ambitions of our main characters.  Apparently, even though we, as fans, don’t give two poos about the Seattle Grace staff’s prowess as doctors, they care a heck of a lot . . .

           Here’s my take on what happened  . . .

Chicken pox = foreplay

                Our favorite lesbian medical practitioners, Arizona and Callie, are getting jiggy in the on-call room (one of the episode’s few opportunities to illustrate the obligatory “naked”ness of the series) when Arizona discovers a round boil on Callie’s body and instantly diagnoses her as having the chicken pox.  Apparently, when Callie was a little girl, her daddy was much too busy (doing whatever it is super rich hotel magnates do) to allow his little girl to play with “chicken pox kids” so that she could contract the illness at a younger, significantly more convenient, age.

             Arizona, who claims to also never have had the chicken pox (And here I thought that exposure to “the pox” was a prerequisite for becoming a pediatrician), literally avoids Callie like the plague, commandeering Lexie to be her caretaker.  Lexie and Mark take turns caring for Callie.  And by “caring,” I mean talking her ear off about how each of them cheated on their relationship but do not want to tell one another about their respective indiscretions. Later in the episode, Arizona and Lexie watch as Mark gives the Itchy Callie a much-needed (and very sexy, especially for a platonic duo) back rub.

            Clearly turned on by all that “rubbing,” Arizona confesses to Lexie that she actually has had the chicken pox before (so, maybe I was right, after all, about the whole “prerequisite” thing).  However, she lied about it, because she feared that caring for Callie while she was pox-covered would somehow make their relationship “less sexy.”  Ummm . . .  really?  Now, I would find this remark shallow coming from any human being, but particularly a person who has chosen a career in the healthcare industry.  Ultimately, Arizona crawls into bed with the Poxy Callie, confident that her relationship can stay “sexy,” ugly chicken pimples and all. 

                  While I was happy that the two reconciled, I have to say, I was a little pissed that Arizona never admitted to Callie that she had already been exposed to the pox.  Instead, Arizona “bravely” told Callie she “didn’t care” if “she got chicken pox” from her lover.  So, now, Callie thinks Arizona is a selfless and altruistic human being, as opposed to the self-absorbed airhead biatch she has just proven herself to be . . .

McSteamy = McHypocrite

            Speaking of self-absorbed airhead biatches, Mark proved himself to be one as well during this episode.  Throughout most of the show, Mark waxed poetic about loving Lexie sooo much and feeling soooo guilty over his indiscretion with former fling Addison last week.  He just “got caught up” in the emotion of it all and “couldn’t control himself.” (Riiiight.  Because, nothing says “aphrodisiac” like an unborn grandbaby suffering amniotic band syndrome and a long-lost daughter suffering from medical and emotional trauma, as a result.)  Seeing as Lexie appeared to feel equally guilty about her roll in the hay with the married Karev, and seemed to be equally in love with Mark, I really thought these two crazy kids could act like adults, and work it out.

            I was only half right.  When Mark admitted his fling to Lexie, she was understanding, and even a bit relieved.  “Now, we are even,” she explained, as she copped to doing the nasty with Karev.  Mark, on the other hand — a guy who is best known for cheating with his best friend’s wife — chose this moment as an opportunity to suddenly become completely judgmental and self-righteous. 

               Mark was appalled that Lexie could even think of cheating on him.  After all, all he did was tell her that he would choose his virtual stranger daughter over her any day, before fleeing the state and flying cross country to screw a former fling.  “I can’t even look at you now,” he seethed piously, as he stalked off, leaving Lexie alone to ponder her own misdeeds.

Izzie and Alex are Dunzo . . . for now.

            Lexie and Mark weren’t the only pair to call it quits this week.  At the opening of the episode, Karev wakes up in bed after an amorous night with Lexie, only to find that his prodigal wife, Izzie, has returned.  Having pretty much freaked out (understandably, to some extent), following her near-terminal brush with brain cancer and subsequent firing, Izzie seemed to be in a much better place than we had seen from her in a long time. 

                  The long-MIA doc was optimistic about taking on a new job opportunity at a hospital in nearby Tacoma (even if, as Derek snobbily mentioned, the hospital did not make it into the coveted Top Twenty ranking).  Additionally, she was thrilled about her newly clean bill of health, and actually seemed excited to rekindle her relationship with her husband ,Alex.  Izzie was even understanding of Alex’s indiscretion with Lexie, explaining to him that the two of them would work through this bump in the road together.

               Unfortunately, for Izzie, Alex wasn’t having any of it.  In what was likely the most heartfelt and, yet most backhanded, compliment ever, Alex explains to Izzie that he loves her, because she helped him to realize that he was a “good person.”  However, now that Alex knows he is a “good person,” he has decided that he is too good for Izzie.  And so, he hopes that she will leave and never come back . . . but she should be happy about it, of course.

              Although Meredith begs her to stay (for specific reasons that I will detail in just a bit), a heartbroken Izzie packs her bags and leaves Seattle . . . for good?

“That’s Chief McDreamy, to You!”

            Surprisingly, Meredith, typically the darkest and twistiest of them all, seems fairly happy and well-adjusted throughout most of this episode.  When Derek informs Meredith that he wants to go to the Medical Board and rat out Chief Drunky McDrunkerson for falling off the wagon, Meredith begs him not to do so.  She does this by adorably evoking the “Post It” Marriage that binds the couple together forever (hopefully). 

              Initially, Derek bows to the all-powerful Post-It.  However, when Chief fails to appear at an important and complex surgery (after Derek has confronted him by “subtly” placing a bottle of booze on his desk) Derek becomes more determined than ever to throw Chief Boozer under the buss, for the good of the hospital.  Of course, the fact that Derek would be made acting Chief of Staff in Chief Webber’s absence doesn’t hurt either.

            When Derek informs Meredith that his first action as Chief would be to hire back the wrongly terminated Izzie (see “reasons for staying” above), Meredith relinquishes her Post-It ultimatum on her friend’s behalf.  At the conclusion of the episode, a drunken, passed-out, Chief is unceremoniously demoted.  And so, Chief McDreamy begins his rise to the Seattle Grace throne  . . .

Owen makes a choice on Christina’s Behalf

            Once again, Owen and Christina showcased what was, in my humble opinion, the best plotline of the evening.  As you might recall, at the conclusion of last week’s episode, Christina had impulsively offered Owen up to Cardio God Terry in exchange for her staying at Seattle Grace as Christina’s mentor.  Teddy, still very much in love with Owen, refused to let Christina forget her not-so-tactful statement.  The more-experienced, but less lucky-in-love Doc proceeded to lord Christina’s words over her head, giving her the cold shoulder through most of the episode.

            This caused the normally cold Christina to grow unusually introspective.  At lunchtime, she interrogated the rest of the Seattle Grace crew, hoping for least one of them to admit that they were more passionate about surgery than their respective relationships.  “This is what you guys talk about during lunch?”  The New Hot Doc inquired incredulously.  (Sorry, buddy, you may be pretty to look at, but you are way too mature and, let’s face it, normal, to hang out with this bunch of crazies . . .)

            Ultimately, Christina finds the justification she is looking for, not in her friends, but in a patient of hers.  She commiserates deeply with a rather obnoxious opera singer with a tumor on his throat, who would rather die than lose his precious voice, even if dying would bring about an untimely end to his relationship with his doting gay lover.  Teddy, although she staunchly refuses to admit it, seems to commiserate with the ass-like patient as well, opting to remove his tumor in such a way that his voice is saved, even though doing so will create a riskier road ahead for the opera singer.

            In the last few minutes of the episode, Teddy gets plastered, and uses that as an opportunity to spill the beans to Owen about Christina’s insensitive earlier statement.  I immediately became concerned that Owen would do the “typical guy thing” and become all hurt and wounded over the remark, possibly getting drunk and sleeping with Teddy out of a pure need for revenge against Christina.  (After all, that’s most likely what I would do, in a situation like this . . .)

            Fortunately, Owen is clearly a better man than I am a woman.  Instead of shunning Christina, upon confronting his medicine-obsessed girlfriend, he grabs her and kisses her passionately, ”People do matter. I matter.  We matter. You don’t get to toss me aside. I won’t let you,” Owen insists resolutely.  And at that moment, the entire female population of Grey’s Anatomy fans’, myself included, allowed their panties to drop to the floor . . . .

            And that, my friends, is the reason why I continue to watch this show . . .

 

2 Comments

Filed under Grey's Anatomy