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“THAT was awkward!” A Recap of Grey’s Anatomy’s “How Insensitive”

 

This week’s installment of Grey’s Anatomy was just FILLED with squirm-inducing, uncomfortable moments.  Moments that were just ASKING for someone to say or do the wrong thing, out of sheer discomfort.  So, it was probably a good thing that the episode began with the Seattle Grace staff taking a crash course in sensitivity training, led by “The Nazi” herself, Miranda Bailey.

“I pity the fool who’s INSENSITIVE around my patients!”

 Here are just some of the awkward moments that our favorite doctors coped with this week . . .

Have 700-pound man, CAN’T travel . . .

Mere minutes after the crew concluded their half-assed class in sensitivity training, a 700-pound patient was delivered to Seattle Grace on the back of a flat bed truck.  In addition to some of the more obvious complications generally associated with carrying that much extra weight (heart conditions, breathing problems, diabetes, immobility, gout etc.), the patient also had a less obvious condition that was life threatening and required medical care.  Namely, a seriously heinous-looking rash was developing beneath his many layers of skin tissue and fat. 

And let me tell you, for those of you out there who are trying to diet, leave this episode on your DVR queue.  When the episode started, I was chowing down on my favorite cereal — two minutes later I had COMPLETELY lost my appetite!

Watch TV, make this face, LOSE WEIGHT!  It’s that simple!

When I started to write this recap, I was torn as to whether I would post pictures of the 700-pound man.  After all, I do have access to them.  And they would certainly help you, the reader, get a better idea of what our doctors were faced with.  Yet . . . quite frankly . . . it was GROSS!  And my blog has been so pretty up until this point — pretty and filled with hot shirtless men who weigh significantly less than 700 pounds.  Like, for example, Justin Chambers (who plays Karev on the show) . . .

So did I really want to do this to my readers and my blog?

Now . . . before you start calling ME insensitive (Shallow?  Maybe.  But insensitive?  Definitely not)  . . . I should tell you that the actor who played the 700 – pound man is not actually 700 pounds.  In fact, he is a very charming, sort of attractive, character actor named Jerry Kernion.  Here’s his REAL picture, sans fat suit.

But the makeup department at Grey’s Anatomy did an almost TOO GOOD  job of making the guy you see above, frighteningly obese and rash-filled.  What’s more, if I posted the actual picture, you might be so disturbed by it that you would miss the point that show was trying to make.  After all, the patient, named Bobby, was so sweet, self-depracating, and genuinely likeable, throughout the episode, that, after a while, you stopped seeing him as the grotesque product of latex and a BIG FAT SUIT, and more as a jolly chubster like this . . .

So that’s what I’ve ultimately decided to do.  Whenever I refer to the 700-pound Bobby in this blog, you will get a picture of The Nutty Professor for your viewing pleasure.  You’re welcome.  Anyway, back to the show . . .

So, 700-pound Bobby . . .

 . . . is being surprisingly light-hearted about this whole thing, smiling and cracking jokes, as the hospital staff pokes and prods him like an animal.  But the staff is so freaked out by their predicament, and so petrified of being thrown off the case for making insensitive remarks, that they come off as cold and distant.  Bailey tosses out Christina and Dr. “Hotness” Avery . . .

Sigh . . .

 . . . within about two minutes, for making fat jokes under their breath.  And that random Frankenstein-y Mercy West doc follows shortly after, for comparing Bobby to a rhinocerous.  But by far the Most Insensitive Comment of the Evening Award goes to Nu-Chief Shepherd, who suggests that the patient be sent home to die because, “Why should we expend our time and resources to care for a patient who doesn’t even both to care for himself?”

Special thanks go out to smileymileyfan35 for this awesome compilation!

Ultimately, Dr. Less-Than-Dreamy reconsiders his earlier position, when we learn that Bobby’s wife is pregnant.

This, of course, raises the inevitable question of HOW?  Down at the hospital cafeteria, home to some of Grey’s Anatomy’s most humorous moments, including this one . . .

Thanks LightSpectre!

 . . . the Grey’s crew tries to figure out the logistics of a sex act between a 700-pound man and a 120ish pound woman.  Karev even resorts to using a “model.”

Unfortunately, for Karev, Bobby’s wife ALSO eats in the cafeteria, and she hears the entire exchange!  OUCH!  To her credit, this woman slays the crew with kindness.  With a smile on her face, she tells them that she would be happy to let them in on the logistics of her sex romp provided the rest of the group share their sexual kinks.  “Then again, it’s probably none of my damn business,” she concludes icily, before stalking away.

She sure showed them . . .

Later Alex confronts the wife to apologize, but she is understandably non-receptive.  “You didn’t know him before this,” she explains.  “To me, he’s still the same man I married.  All he’s been trying to do all day is make you laugh, and you’re all so disgusted by him, you can’t even crack a smile.  I thought you could help him.  But you’re just making it worse.”

Taking the woman’s speech to heart, Alex visits Bobby . . .

 . . . who is now convinced he wants to die.  “No child deserves a father like this,” says Bobby.  “It would be better if he didn’t know me at all.”

Alex eases the tension by exchanging a few fat jokes with Bobby.  He then gives him some tough love, explaining that a decision to die would be a selfish one.  He would be leaving his wife to clean up a “700-pound mess.” Alex ultimately convinces Bobby to go through with the risky surgery by saying, “at least your wife and kid would know you tried.”

After a few nerve-wracking hiccups, Bobby survives the surgery and vows to make some major lifestyle changes.  We hope he does, because we like our Nutty Professor a lot . . .

 . . . and we want to keep him around.

The Gossip, The Big Fat Liar  . . . and Meredith

When Gossip Girl Derek  . . .

 . . . makes an offhand comment to Meredith about Owen refusal to support Teddy, when her job was on the line last week, he puts his Post-It Wife in a BAD position.  On one hand, Derek is her sort-of husband, and she should generally keep his confidences.  On the other, Christina is her best friend.  And if her best friend is dating a Big Fat Liar (Owen told Christina he had helped Teddy keep the job), she has a right to know about it.   To Meredith’s credit, she initially keeps her mouth shut.  But when she overhears Teddy THANKING Owen for his help and support, she can’t help but toss a withering look his way.

And so, like a petulant child, with his hand caught in the cookie jar, Owen  . . .

Sergeant D-Bag

 . . . reacts defensively by kicking Meredith off his surgical team for no apparent reason, and freaking out on Derek for divulging his confidences.  Derek confronts Meredith and the two get into a heated argument about the importance of openness and confidentiality in a marriage.  However, I’m with Meredith on this one.  If Derek didn’t want Post-It Wife to react to information that was obviously pertinent to the life of her best friend, he just plain shouldn’t have told her.  BAD DEREK!

Divorce Papers, PDAs and Foreplay

I know, I know . . . this is an OLD pic.  Just imagine Lexie with blonde hair, OK?

So Izzie finally sent Karev the divorce papers (because Katherine Heigl is off the show).  And Karev didn’t seem to think that this was pertinent information to share with girl he’d been screwing for the past four or five episodes.  But when Meredith tries to discuss it with him, Lexie overhears.  OOPS!  And she’s pissed!  When confronted with the issue, both halves of the screwing bunnies claim that their relationship is just about sex.  However, at the end of the episode, when Karev is signing the divorce papers and Lexie stops by, he plants a big sloppy wet one on her in public, which, in Grey’s world, equals TRUE LOVE!

 (at least until someone better comes along . . .)

Breaking up is Hard to Do . . .

We all knew it was coming.  It was just a question of when it would happen and how it would arise.  Honestly, the circumstances that brought about the Callie / Arizona breakup seemed a bit contrived to me.  But that didn’t make it any less heartbreaking when it happened. 

So, there was this cheeky little bike riding chick in the hospital who needed a knee repair.  And she starts TOTALLY hitting on Callie hardcore.  This was REALLY ballsy of the chick, I think, because (1) Callie is her doctor; and (2) your gaydar has to be PRETTY fine-tuned to pick up on Callie Torres’ same-sex tendencies.  I mean, she’s not exactly this guy . . .

Before leaving the hospital, the biker chick writes her telephone number in permanent marker on Callie’s hand.  (What, no cell phone?  Is this another 80s flashback episode, and I just didn’t know it?)  So, Callie, being the passive aggressive gal she is, shows Arizona the number and says, “Every time I looked at this girl, I just kept wondering if she might want to have a baby someday.”  (Riiiiiiight . . . because that’s the first thing I think about, when I find myself attracted to a perfect stranger . . . FERTILITY.)

After hearing this, Arizona agrees to move out of the apartment that the couple shares.  The two lovers cry, while hugging it out.  Love sucks!

“I miss my dad.”

Speaking of crying, Sandra Oh had me bawling like a baby this week.  It all started when she was asked to watch over a little girl who’s mother had experienced a heart attack. While the mother is undergoing tests, Christina bonds with the little girl — so much so, that when the mother is rushed into surgery, Christina chooses to comfort the crying child, instead of operating on her mother.

While the pair is playing cards, the little girl asks Christina what will happen if her mother dies.  Just as she is asking this, Avery enters the room, and silently lets Christina know that the little girl’s mother did not make it through surgery. 

Trying to keep her face impassive, Christina replies,  “If your mother dies, you will blame yourself.  You will think that you did not do enough to help her.  But that is not true.  You did everything you could.  Remember that.  And it’s going to hurt everytime you think about her.  But, over time, it will begin to hurt a little less.  Until, one day, you will find that you can think about her, without it hurting much at all.”

(And, wow, I just cried typing that.)

Avery . . .

Sigh . . . Are any of you routing for an eventual Christina / Avery pairing, as much as I am?

 . . . who overheard Christina’s speech, confronts her about it, wondering about whether she had experienced a similar death in the family, at a yong age.  (Long-time viewers, like myself, know that her father died in a car accident, when she was very young.  Christina was in the car and had to watch him die.  It was this experience that prompted Christina to eventually become a doctor.) 

Christina sloughs it off, claiming that she was merely “kicking ass at sensitivity training.”  However, later, when Meredith approaches Christina, she roughly pushes her away, asking to speak to Owen.  When Owen enters the room with her, she breaks down, “I miss my dad,” she admits tearfully.

(And I just starting crying AGAIN, as I typed that.  Hormones much?)

While I go find some tissues, I’m going to leave you with this clip from next week’s installment of Grey’s Anatomy, which guest star’s Disney darling, Demi Lovato, as a schizophrenic patient with a penchant for self-mutilation.

Thank you Bluesky1234 for the late-breaking video!

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All Work and No Play (Well, Maybe Some Play . . .) – A Grey’s Anatomy Recap

                So, I was all set to do this recap, when it occurred to me that I didn’t know what this episode was called.  The TV.com Episode Guide actually lists Thursday’s Grey’s Anatomy episode title as “I Like You So Much Better When You’re Naked.”  Seriously?   Is that not the longest episode title you have ever seen?  Even if you boil it down to its initials (as recappers and fangirls tend to do), it is reduced merely to the highly unwieldy ILYSMBWYN.

             And yet, the title, untenable as it may be, pretty accurately describes how I generally feel about Grey’s Anatomy.  Because, honestly, who really watches Grey’s for the medical stuff?  We used to have ER for that.  Now, I guess we have that Mercy show . . .

            If I had my druthers, McDreamy and Karev would be out of their scrubs way more often than in them.  That being said, I was genuinely surprised at how much I enjoyed this installment of Grey’s Anatomy, particularly seeing as it contained virtually no nudity at all, and focused almost entirely on the career ambitions of our main characters.  Apparently, even though we, as fans, don’t give two poos about the Seattle Grace staff’s prowess as doctors, they care a heck of a lot . . .

           Here’s my take on what happened  . . .

Chicken pox = foreplay

                Our favorite lesbian medical practitioners, Arizona and Callie, are getting jiggy in the on-call room (one of the episode’s few opportunities to illustrate the obligatory “naked”ness of the series) when Arizona discovers a round boil on Callie’s body and instantly diagnoses her as having the chicken pox.  Apparently, when Callie was a little girl, her daddy was much too busy (doing whatever it is super rich hotel magnates do) to allow his little girl to play with “chicken pox kids” so that she could contract the illness at a younger, significantly more convenient, age.

             Arizona, who claims to also never have had the chicken pox (And here I thought that exposure to “the pox” was a prerequisite for becoming a pediatrician), literally avoids Callie like the plague, commandeering Lexie to be her caretaker.  Lexie and Mark take turns caring for Callie.  And by “caring,” I mean talking her ear off about how each of them cheated on their relationship but do not want to tell one another about their respective indiscretions. Later in the episode, Arizona and Lexie watch as Mark gives the Itchy Callie a much-needed (and very sexy, especially for a platonic duo) back rub.

            Clearly turned on by all that “rubbing,” Arizona confesses to Lexie that she actually has had the chicken pox before (so, maybe I was right, after all, about the whole “prerequisite” thing).  However, she lied about it, because she feared that caring for Callie while she was pox-covered would somehow make their relationship “less sexy.”  Ummm . . .  really?  Now, I would find this remark shallow coming from any human being, but particularly a person who has chosen a career in the healthcare industry.  Ultimately, Arizona crawls into bed with the Poxy Callie, confident that her relationship can stay “sexy,” ugly chicken pimples and all. 

                  While I was happy that the two reconciled, I have to say, I was a little pissed that Arizona never admitted to Callie that she had already been exposed to the pox.  Instead, Arizona “bravely” told Callie she “didn’t care” if “she got chicken pox” from her lover.  So, now, Callie thinks Arizona is a selfless and altruistic human being, as opposed to the self-absorbed airhead biatch she has just proven herself to be . . .

McSteamy = McHypocrite

            Speaking of self-absorbed airhead biatches, Mark proved himself to be one as well during this episode.  Throughout most of the show, Mark waxed poetic about loving Lexie sooo much and feeling soooo guilty over his indiscretion with former fling Addison last week.  He just “got caught up” in the emotion of it all and “couldn’t control himself.” (Riiiight.  Because, nothing says “aphrodisiac” like an unborn grandbaby suffering amniotic band syndrome and a long-lost daughter suffering from medical and emotional trauma, as a result.)  Seeing as Lexie appeared to feel equally guilty about her roll in the hay with the married Karev, and seemed to be equally in love with Mark, I really thought these two crazy kids could act like adults, and work it out.

            I was only half right.  When Mark admitted his fling to Lexie, she was understanding, and even a bit relieved.  “Now, we are even,” she explained, as she copped to doing the nasty with Karev.  Mark, on the other hand — a guy who is best known for cheating with his best friend’s wife — chose this moment as an opportunity to suddenly become completely judgmental and self-righteous. 

               Mark was appalled that Lexie could even think of cheating on him.  After all, all he did was tell her that he would choose his virtual stranger daughter over her any day, before fleeing the state and flying cross country to screw a former fling.  “I can’t even look at you now,” he seethed piously, as he stalked off, leaving Lexie alone to ponder her own misdeeds.

Izzie and Alex are Dunzo . . . for now.

            Lexie and Mark weren’t the only pair to call it quits this week.  At the opening of the episode, Karev wakes up in bed after an amorous night with Lexie, only to find that his prodigal wife, Izzie, has returned.  Having pretty much freaked out (understandably, to some extent), following her near-terminal brush with brain cancer and subsequent firing, Izzie seemed to be in a much better place than we had seen from her in a long time. 

                  The long-MIA doc was optimistic about taking on a new job opportunity at a hospital in nearby Tacoma (even if, as Derek snobbily mentioned, the hospital did not make it into the coveted Top Twenty ranking).  Additionally, she was thrilled about her newly clean bill of health, and actually seemed excited to rekindle her relationship with her husband ,Alex.  Izzie was even understanding of Alex’s indiscretion with Lexie, explaining to him that the two of them would work through this bump in the road together.

               Unfortunately, for Izzie, Alex wasn’t having any of it.  In what was likely the most heartfelt and, yet most backhanded, compliment ever, Alex explains to Izzie that he loves her, because she helped him to realize that he was a “good person.”  However, now that Alex knows he is a “good person,” he has decided that he is too good for Izzie.  And so, he hopes that she will leave and never come back . . . but she should be happy about it, of course.

              Although Meredith begs her to stay (for specific reasons that I will detail in just a bit), a heartbroken Izzie packs her bags and leaves Seattle . . . for good?

“That’s Chief McDreamy, to You!”

            Surprisingly, Meredith, typically the darkest and twistiest of them all, seems fairly happy and well-adjusted throughout most of this episode.  When Derek informs Meredith that he wants to go to the Medical Board and rat out Chief Drunky McDrunkerson for falling off the wagon, Meredith begs him not to do so.  She does this by adorably evoking the “Post It” Marriage that binds the couple together forever (hopefully). 

              Initially, Derek bows to the all-powerful Post-It.  However, when Chief fails to appear at an important and complex surgery (after Derek has confronted him by “subtly” placing a bottle of booze on his desk) Derek becomes more determined than ever to throw Chief Boozer under the buss, for the good of the hospital.  Of course, the fact that Derek would be made acting Chief of Staff in Chief Webber’s absence doesn’t hurt either.

            When Derek informs Meredith that his first action as Chief would be to hire back the wrongly terminated Izzie (see “reasons for staying” above), Meredith relinquishes her Post-It ultimatum on her friend’s behalf.  At the conclusion of the episode, a drunken, passed-out, Chief is unceremoniously demoted.  And so, Chief McDreamy begins his rise to the Seattle Grace throne  . . .

Owen makes a choice on Christina’s Behalf

            Once again, Owen and Christina showcased what was, in my humble opinion, the best plotline of the evening.  As you might recall, at the conclusion of last week’s episode, Christina had impulsively offered Owen up to Cardio God Terry in exchange for her staying at Seattle Grace as Christina’s mentor.  Teddy, still very much in love with Owen, refused to let Christina forget her not-so-tactful statement.  The more-experienced, but less lucky-in-love Doc proceeded to lord Christina’s words over her head, giving her the cold shoulder through most of the episode.

            This caused the normally cold Christina to grow unusually introspective.  At lunchtime, she interrogated the rest of the Seattle Grace crew, hoping for least one of them to admit that they were more passionate about surgery than their respective relationships.  “This is what you guys talk about during lunch?”  The New Hot Doc inquired incredulously.  (Sorry, buddy, you may be pretty to look at, but you are way too mature and, let’s face it, normal, to hang out with this bunch of crazies . . .)

            Ultimately, Christina finds the justification she is looking for, not in her friends, but in a patient of hers.  She commiserates deeply with a rather obnoxious opera singer with a tumor on his throat, who would rather die than lose his precious voice, even if dying would bring about an untimely end to his relationship with his doting gay lover.  Teddy, although she staunchly refuses to admit it, seems to commiserate with the ass-like patient as well, opting to remove his tumor in such a way that his voice is saved, even though doing so will create a riskier road ahead for the opera singer.

            In the last few minutes of the episode, Teddy gets plastered, and uses that as an opportunity to spill the beans to Owen about Christina’s insensitive earlier statement.  I immediately became concerned that Owen would do the “typical guy thing” and become all hurt and wounded over the remark, possibly getting drunk and sleeping with Teddy out of a pure need for revenge against Christina.  (After all, that’s most likely what I would do, in a situation like this . . .)

            Fortunately, Owen is clearly a better man than I am a woman.  Instead of shunning Christina, upon confronting his medicine-obsessed girlfriend, he grabs her and kisses her passionately, ”People do matter. I matter.  We matter. You don’t get to toss me aside. I won’t let you,” Owen insists resolutely.  And at that moment, the entire female population of Grey’s Anatomy fans’, myself included, allowed their panties to drop to the floor . . . .

            And that, my friends, is the reason why I continue to watch this show . . .

 

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