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So Many Balls, So Little Time – A Recap of Galavant’s Episodes 3 and 4

appreciate it

Greetings Galavantians! And welcome to week two of ABC’s four-week medieval musical extravaganza, Galavant . . . the show where three quarters of the songs are about male genitalia and I’m still rooting for the bad guy to win.

spitting

While most of you were off enjoying Globes that were Golden, I was busy being entertained by balls of an entirely different sort . . .

. . . or lack thereof, as in the case of this eunuch (who may or may not be Varys from Game of Thrones‘s dumber, but slightly more jovial twin brother) . . .

loss is gain

mad var

No seriously, watching this guy get his non-balls get kicked repeatedly was one of the highlights of this episode, which undoubtedly says terrible things about me as a human being.

Also in the balls category, as in soirees, Galavant’s first half hour featured not one, but two wild and crazy parties (i.e., the kind of balls you won’t find attached to a eunuch’s groin) . . .

. . . neither of which featured Matthew McConaughey or his beard, unfortunately.

72nd Annual Golden Globe Awards - Arrivals

livin

And definitely no Meryl Streep.

The second half hour of Galavant was a dream come true for anyone who has ever laid in bed at night and wondered, “Golly gee, I wonder what Lord Grantham from Downton Abbey would look like as a pirate.”

must sked

I know I have!

. . . also MORE BALLS! This time, belonging to This Guy . . .

more than

Let’s review, shall we?

You can check out the rest of this recap here.

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“Maybe You’re Not the Worst Thing Ever” – A Recap of Galavant’s “Joust Friends”

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“Your frigid and demanding, I shudder at your call.

Whenever you come near me, my skin begins to crawl.

But sometimes there are moments, I’m not repelled at all.

Maybe, you’re not the worst thing ever.”

Galavant – Episode 2

So says the final song of the first of two episodes of ABC’s Galavant, an eight-part medieval musical miniseries conveniently squatting in Once Upon a Time’s time slot over the next few weeks. They also pretty much embody my feelings toward the series pilot in general.

Although there were some genuine moments of laugh-out-loud funny, this sitcom gets bogged down by a mish-mash of other ho-hum stuff like a tired musical training montage, a forced will they/won’t they/obviously they will love-hate relationship between the lead and his “princess in distress,” and a few winking Game of Thrones references.

haters going to

(And don’t even get me started on the Galavant-inspired singing commercials we had to endure throughout the hour. If I never hear anyone sing a song about ABC’s Revenge again for as long as I live, it will be too soon . . . although I suspect I will . . . probably as early as next week.)

despise you

On a lighter note, the Evil King is my absolute favorite! Is it terrible that I’m genuinely 100% rooting for the bad guy to win in this one?

picky eater

So, get on your high horses, raise your swords high, and try not to get gravy on your tummy flowers, because it’s time to gallop into the weird, wacky world of Galavant . . .

You can check out the rest of this recap here.

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Filed under ABC, Galavant