Tag Archives: Romeo and Juliet

Anatomy of the BRAND NEW True Blood Trailer Released at Comic-Con 2010!

Tonight, the True Blood cast held a panel session at Comic-Con 2010 in San Diego.   I wasn’t there . . .

But I DID manage to snag a copy of the BRAND NEW trailer for the second half of Season 3, which was released during the panel session . . .

And, of course, it was AWESOME!  Check it out . . .

OK.  It’s time to ANALYZE THE HELL OUT OF THIS THING!  So, remove your jaw from the floor, retract your fangs, put your shirt (and pants) back on, and let’s get to it, shall we?

:07 – I don’t know about you, but this has always been how I preferred my Vampire Bill:  Hot, Shirtless and Chained to the Floor where he can’t get in the way of the inevitable Sookie / Eric lovefest going on nearby.

:08 – Who knew that when Franklin Mott bought Tara that UGLY ASS NIGHTY / WEDDING DRESS (probably back in the early 1800’s), he had also purchased a matching one for HIMSELF! 

(At least he finally SHAVED though.  That morning stubble must have been HELL to wake up next to . . . and I’m not talking about the one in his pants. . . )

:16 – It looks like Creepy J.J. from Big Love the Magister has got Pam!  That’s not good . . .

:17 – Hey, Vampire Bill!  That’s a nice tan your sporting!  How did . . . wait . . . uh oh!

:28 – ERIC: “I don’t know what it is.  But I know it is quite valuable.”

Look how lovingly Sookie looks at Eric, even when he is trying to pawn her off on the Big Gay Vampire King, like she’s some early 19th-century antique (Vampire Bill?).  But seriously, can you blame her?  Have you SEEN what Vampire Eric looks like in that Baby Blue Panty Dropper Sweater of his?  He can sell ME to the highest bidder, ANYTIME!

:32 – Shirtless Tommy Mickens (Marshall Allman) – Not really my cup of tea, personally.  But someone found this blog by searching for THIS EXACT IMAGE.  And I DO hate to disappoint my readers  . .  . So, here you go!

:35 – OK.  I’m confused.  When did I STOP watching the True Blood trailer, and randomly switch over to outtakes from the movie, Deliverance?

(Cringes, as “Dueling Banjos” plays in the background.)

:37 – Question: When white trash gets cleaned up, is it called “White-Washed Trash?” 

 (I didn’t like that comment Mommy Mickens made about Sam not being “family,” one bit, by the way.  But it DOES confirm what I always thought about her character.  Hint:  It rhymes with “masshole.”)

:41 – SHIRTLESS STACKHOUSE ALERT!   SHIRTLESS STACKHOUSE ALERT!

It looks like him and Crystal will be getting VERY CLOSE, VERY FAST . .  . and that her family doesn’t approve of the coupling AT ALL.  Awww . . . it’s like Romeo and Juliet . . .

 . . . if Romeo and Juliet took place in a trailer park in Louisianna . . .

:43 – Way to go Jason!  Whipping out the BIG GUNS!  (And I’m NOT talking about artillery . . .)

:53 – I just LOVE when Vampire Eric gets all up in Sookie’s personal space . . . and so does SHE!

(Note: I’m pointedly choosing to IGNORE that MEAN thing Eric said to Sookie in this scene, because his body language here CLEARLY implies otherwise . . .)

:54 – Speaking of foreplay . . .

1:00 – Of course, it wouldn’t be a True Blood trailer without at least one, “BEEEEEEEEELLLLLL!”

1:04 – It’s nice to see our former BFF’s, Sookie and Tara, bonding again.  It’s also REALLY NICE to see Tara (1) out of captivity; (2) in the sun (It means she’s not a vampire yet.); and (3) dressed in normal clothes from the 21st Century . . .

1:09 – First Deliverance, now The Matrix?  I think this trailer is broken . . .

(Actually, I’m pretty sure that Leather Chick is Vampire Spokesperson Nan from Season 2 . . .)

1:13 – White fur?  Red glowing eyes?  Ladies and gentlemen, I think we have just met our first WERE-VAMPIRE!

(Some vampire lore states that if a person consumes enough vampire blood, he or she can become a vampire without actually . . . you know . . . dying.  If that’s true HERE, and all those werewolves have been consuming Big Gay Vampire King Russell’s blood for lord knows how long, this is some SERIOUISLY BAD NEWS for Sookie and Co.)

1:14 – ALCIDE:  “I don’t take orders from vamps!”

Oooh, Alcide is SEXY when he’s angry!  And he’s sticking it to Vampire Bill too .  . . which makes it even hotter.

(By the way, I heard they just recently announced that Joe Manganiello, who plays Alcide, has officially been awarded SEASON REGULAR status!)

Here’s a little something to help you celebrate this AMAZING news!

And another SOMETHING . . .

You’re welcome.

1:19 – SOOKIE:  “If I knew what was best for me, I would have fallen in love with someone like you.”

(Get in line, Sookie!  Get in line . . .)

1:24 – SOOKIE:  “GET .  . . OUT . . . OF MY HOUSE . . . B*TCH!”

YEAH!  You go, Bad Ass Commando Sookie!

Be afraid, Trashy Debbie She-Mullet!  Be VERY afraid!

1:34 – Don’t you just HATE IT when you get stuck in the ceiling, next to the multi-million dollar chandelier!  I know I do .  . .

1:47 – You know, for some reason, every time I see Lorena, I get that song by Flo Rida stuck in my head.  “You spin my head right round, right round, when you go down, when you go down, down.”

I can’t imagine why . . .

1:53 – Poor Sookie!  If  this was any other character on this show, a picture like this would have me really worried.  But it’s SOOKIE .  . . so, I’m not.  

(No Sookie = No True Blood, and if the ratings are any indication, this show is going to be around for a LONG, LONG time!  Therefore, I’m thinking our girl is going to be just fine.  Just a little hunch I have . . .)

1:57 – Hey, I don’t like this Dream Sequence!  A Dream Sequence without a shirtless male in it, is like  . . . well . . . I don’t know what it’s like . . . something LAME though, that’s for sure! 

2:01 – Here is our first glimpse of Claudine (played by Lara Pulver). She was a fairly important character in the latter half of Charlaine Harris’ Sookie Stackhouse Book series.  Unfortunately, I can’t TELL you what role she plays in Sookie’s life, because I don’t want to spoil it for you.  I CAN show it to you though . . .

(Warning: Spoilerific picture, below.)

And there you have it.  The new True Blood trailer in a nutshell.  So, what did you think?

[www.juliekushner.com]

15 Comments

Filed under Spoilers and Sneak Peaks, True Blood

Do you bite your thumb at me, sir?

Does the above quote give you cringe-inducing flashbacks from your high school English class?  For me, the answer is definitely yes.  My freshman English teacher was rather rotund, and had serious issues with sweating, drooling and spitting.  Did I mention I sat in the front row?  But I digress . . .

Brownie points for those of you who recalled that this line was written by our good ole’ pal William Shakespeare.  (Act1, Scene 1 of Romeo and Juliet, to be exact)  I remember reading this particular line for the first time and being extremely confused.  “What’s the deal with all of this talk about thumb biting?”  “Were these guys just really hungry?”  “Maybe, back in ‘Fair Verona,’ eating human thumb was some sort of delicacy?”

After Cliff Notes explained to me that “thumb biting” was considered the ultimate insult back in the day, I was only slightly less confused.  I mean, I don’t know about you, but I could think of a ton of worse ways to offend someone than by merely nibbling on your own finger.  After all, I have had both nail-biting and thumb-sucking friends my entire life.  If I took umbrage every time they actively engaged one of their digits, I would be one seriously unhappy person.

Why am I writing about Shakespeare on a television recap blog, you ask?  Here’s the thing . . . in the past two days, I have watched two reality shows (The Bad Girls Club and The Real World . . . don’t judge me, please) that have featured a female spitting in another individual’s face.  The two situations that gave rise to the alleged salival exchange were markedly different from one another. 

In the first, the spitter was responding to an incident in which the spittee, a sworn enemy of the spitter, had thrown the spitter’s makeup out the window of the house where both parties were residing.  In the second, the spitter was “play fighting” with the spittee, a male companion of hers with whom she had been sexually intimate just hours before, and things got out of control. 

In this second case, the spittee responded by erupting into a rampage and tossing furniture around the room.  He came very close to hitting the former object of his desires.  This latter incident in particular had me torn.  After all, The Real World Spitter just happened to be my favorite castmember on the show, a woman who, up to this point, had proven herself to be a highly intelligent, likeable and classy human being.  Plus, as I mentioned earlier,  her and the Spittee had had SEX before, so exchanging bodily fluids was certainly nothing new to this pair.  (More on that in another blog entry.)

Wathcing these events unfold, I couldn’t help but be reminded of yet another much-publicized incident that took place a few years ago on the moronic reality dating show Flava of Love.  (Why anyone in their right mind would want to date a scrawny toothless middle-aged dude with a big clock around his neck is beyond me.)  On that show, a woman nicknamed “Pumpkin?” (don’t ask)  spit in the face of a woman named “New York” because the two were fighting over the aforementioned scrawny toothless clock-wearing dude.

I have been told, that like thumb-biting back in Shakespeare’s time, spitting in one’s face is considered the ultimate form of offense today.  Really?  Was I absent the day they taught face-spitting in school?  (Maybe not, if you recall who my high school English teacher was.)  How else could I have missed this important Spit Zeitgeist?

First of all, spitting in someone’s face is just not something I would ever consider doing.  (For starters, I have really bad aim.  I’d probably just end up drooling all over myself.)  Second, don’t get me wrong, spitting is pretty nasty, and there aren’t a whole lot of people whose saliva I’d like to have on my face.  But is this really the worst thing you could do to another human being?  Because I, for one, would rather be spit at than punched in the face any day of the week and twice on Sunday, based on the associated medical costs alone.  We are, after all, in a recession economy . . .

So, am I totally out of touch regarding the whole Spitting Phenomenon?  Perhaps someone could enlighten me regarding what is clearly a hot button issue for our generation . . .

1 Comment

Filed under Reality Television