I suspect that there are many of you out there who only watch Grey’sAnatomy for the “mushy-gushy relationship stuff” . . .
. . . the bizarro plotlines involving psycho serial killers . . .
. . . the hot hallucinatory Ghost Sex . . .
. . . and the abundance of Sexy Shirtless Men . . .
(NEWS FLASH: Nearly Naked Dr. Avery! Coming Soon to a TV Near You, October 14th! Never has the invention of HDTV been more appreciated . . .)
And while all of the above are perfectly valid reasons to watch this long-running show, what many fans fail to realize, is that Grey’s Anatomy is also a treasure trove of life lessons for us all!
So, without further adieu, let’s look back at the lessons we learned from this week’s installment of Grey’s Anatomy, “Shock to the System.”
1) If you wish to fake an emotional breakthrough with your shrink, so that he will clear you to return to work (or, at least, trade those LAME anti-depressants he currently has you on, for the AWESOME uppers you’ve been eyeing since you started therapy), bad mascara and crumbly tissues are not enough . . .
Particularly if, even after crying, you still look like you belong in a Banana Republic magazine advertisement . . .
Drastic times call for drastic measures. And in this situation, Ugly Cry Face is required. Here are a few examples of what I mean:
Then again, if your name is “Meredith Grey,” and you are on a show called GREY’SAnatomy, you’ll be back at work after two episodes, anyway. So, you might not even need to resort to this . . .
2) Those who lie down with criminals . . .
. . . wake up smelling like pee . . .
(and sometimes unwittingly attract new boyfriends named “Vito.”)
3) It may come as a shock to you, but there are some TV Watchers and (patients at Seattle Grace) . . .
. . . who stopped watching Grey’s Anatomy after the third season.
Shocking . . . yes . . . but entirely plausible. As a result of their Grey’s -watching negligence, these individuals may truly believe that Christina Yang is still involved with Dr. Preston Burke . . .
. . . and that Isaiah Washington was never fired from the show . . .
“Well, THAT was awkward!”
While we are on the subject, here are some other aspects of the show about which these erstwhile Grey’s fans might be confused:
“Who are half these people?”
“Where the heck are George and Izzie?”
“So, Callie is a lesbian, now?”
4) When trying to convince your colleagues that you aren’t Bat Sh*t Crazy . . .
. . . screaming at them “That’s ME, I’m the CRAZY ONE!” and running around the hospital muttering loudly to yourself, “She never saw it coming! She never saw it coming!” OMG! She never saw it coming!” will probably not help your cause.
Oh . . . and while we are at it . . . just because one of your patients is crying . . .
. . . doesn’t mean it has to do with YOU and YOUR PROBLEMS. Strange as it may seem, THE WORLD DOESN’T REVOLVE AROUND YOU!!!!!
Regardless, of what HE might lead you to believe . . .
5) If you play a lesbian couple on a show that predominately caters to straight females . . .
. . . the best you can hope for in a storyline is some comic relief-esque banter involving room decoration and paint swatches.
Thanks for playing! Better luck next time!
6) If Miranda Bailey is touching your boobies, in the middle of a hospital hallway . . .
. . . your secrets WILL come out . . .
. . . even if she has to wrench them from your body with a pair of barely sterilized tweezers!
7) When THIS GUY says you are not ready to do surgeries . . .
. . . you are NOT READY TO DO SURGERIES!
No “ifs” “ands” or “buts” about it, MISSY!
8 ) Are you single? Feeling lonely? Unappreciated by the men (or women) in your life?
Worry not! Getting the objects of your desire to notice you is EASY!
Just get STRUCK BY LIGHTENING, along with all the men of your dreams!
You’ll be beating them off with a stick in NO TIME! (No really . . . you’ll probably end up wanting to physically beat them.)
9) If your boyfriend is a shrink, and most of your dates are spent with you just talking, and him just “listening” . . .
. . . you’re not in a “relationship,” you’re in “therapy.” Then again, with healthcare plans being what they are today, WHO CARES?
But, if he ever sends you a bill for his “services,” it’s probably time for you two to have “the talk.” (The phrase “quid pro quo” might come in handy . . . just saying.)
And finally . . .
10) If you lost your husband’s baby during a tragic accident . . .
. . . and haven’t told him yet, just bite the bullet and DO IT!
If he’s anything like Dr. McDreamy, he’ll be totally cool with it! And if he’s not . . . well . . . you wouldn’t want his Ugly Ass Baby, ANYWAY!
So, there you have it — Ten Lessons learned from this week’s installment of Grey’s Anatomy. Consider yourself SCHOOLED!
These are two ACTUAL screencaps. Both were taken from the first FIVE MINUTES of Thursday night’s Grey’s Anatomy. You’re welcome.
After last week’s cringe-tastic, surgery heavy, UGLY episode . . . thanks to which, I will never view this image in the same way EVER again . . .
. . . it was really nice to see Grey’s getting back to it’s roots this week — You know, surgery-lite; mushy-gushy relationship stuff / shirtless men HEAVY. I don’t know about you, but I tend to prefer my Grey’s simple and super girly. And a girly Grey’s was exactly what I got!
“Give me an E – S -T -R- O -G -E-N! What’s that spell?”
Couples really took center stage during this episode of Grey’s. Heck, even this week’s medical mysteries featured “couples” of some sort. Well . . . except for ONE medical mystery . . .
WOAH! This Disney Chick can ACT . . . so well that I can almost forgive her for that Princess Protection Program movie . . .
. . . ALMOST.
So, what are we waiting for? Let’s get on with this girly boink-fest!
We’re Having a Party . . . Everybody’s Slutty!
The episode began with a PARTY at the Mer and Der House! It was a party to celebrate McDreamy!
For what reason, I am not entirely sure . . . for being Chief, I guess. The only problem was . . . it wasn’t a very good fiesta. Karev, perhaps, said it best when he remarked, “This party blows.”
For one thing, everyone looked all stuffy and uncomfortable, in their suits and “business casual” dresswear, i.e. dowdy dresses, that don’t show anything above the knee. Who the heck has house parties like this? Your grandpa, that’s who! And that’s when it suddenly occurred to me. Our Greysies are getting OLD!
It’s TRUE! Meredith proved it, when she said, “At my parties, we drank tequila and danced on tables!”
And that was true . . FIVE SEASONS AGO . . .
Remember the Boozy Slutty Dysfunctional Meredith of Season 1? Good times!
But it’s not true now! The one good thing about the party, was that it offered us this lovely picture, of our suave and suited Grey’s men, sipping scotch and poring over floor plans . . .
How very Ocean’s 11 of them! Not this Ocean’s 11, mind you . . .
. . . more like this one . . .
See what I mean . . . about the OLD?
Anyway, things improved quickly, when we LEFT the party and were delivered NOT ONE, BUT TWO, shirtless prelude-to sex scenes . . . The first one was between Bailey and her latelyMIA Gas Man . . .
Remember him? If you didn’t before, I bet you won’t forget him NOW!
The second scene, not-so-surprisingly, featured Mark “I-Get-More-Play-Than-A Slot-Machine-In-Vegas” Sloan.
What was surprising, was who he was with. It wasn’t his current girlfriend, Teddy, nor his ex-girlfriend, Lexie. Nor was he with his “friends with benefits” gal pal, the recently single, Callie. Nope, Sloan was with . . .
. . . that annoying pixie-haired Mercy Wester chick, who hasn’t been around for half the season?
Ummm . . . yeah, so McSteamy is coming out of the shower all steamy, after what was probably a fairly tepid round of lovemaking with Slutty but Boring Doc Reed, when, who walks in and catches them post-coitus?
You guessed it, his current girlfriend TEDDY! To Sloan’s credit, he doesn’t do that thing you see in romantic comedies, where the guy gets caught in the act of cheating, and he starts jumping around like a jack rabbit, sputtering, “It’s NOT what you think!” (When it always is exactly THAT!)
Instead, he INVITES TEDDY TO JOIN THEM!
Way to go McSteamy! You may be a mental midget when it comes to the ways of women, but you sure are COOL!
Unfortunately, the producers cut away from the scene, before we can find out if Teddy accepts the proposition, but I’m thinking . . . NOT! Truth be told, Teddy is only interested in one threesome, and one threesome only . . . this one.
News Flash Cristina Yang, Owen is Just Not That Into You . . .
Hey, Yang! Wanna join my book club? We’re reading one that you will LOVE!
Speaking of the World’s Most Unhappy Threesome Ever, while Teddy is being cheated on by Mark, Owen is impulsively asking a drunk Cristina to move in with him, “because my therapist said it was a good idea.” Now if that’s not a ringing endorsement for romance, folks, I don’t know what is!
Cristina instantly AGREES to this lame proposition, and I start to wonder whether the majority of her brain cells are housed in her scrubs. After all, it seems like such an uncharacteristically DUMB move on the part of a woman who, normally, is one of the most intelligent characters on this show. Then again, it wouldn’t be the first time that a man made Cristina do less than brilliant things . . .
EEEVILL!
Meredith overhears this exchange, and is again faced with the moral crisis she dealt with last week. You see, Meredith is convinced that Owen’s failure to follow Cristina’s wishes, and help Teddy keep her job, was incontrovertible evidence that Owen is secretly in love with Teddy.
“I LOVE YOU . . . so I tried to get you fired. My therapist said it was a good idea . . .”
So, on one hand, she owes it to her BFF Cristina to let her know that her boyfriend is a poopy head . . .
. . . and, like all poopy, deserves to be unceremoniously dumped. On the other hand, the information she learned about Owen, came from Derek, and the confidentiality requirements associated with Post-It Note Marriages, are SERIOUS!
Nothing says loving like Sticky Paper, purchased in a 150-note multicolored pack (2 for $3.00!) at CVS . . .
So, Meredith decides to play King Solomon and split the baby . . .
. . . instead of outright telling Cristina about her poopy head boyfriend, she drops annoyingly coy hints of his emotional infidelity, throughout the episode. Initially, Cristina, who has always been a “shoot the messenger” type gal, gets pissed at Meredith, and denies that such infidelity exists. However, with the seeds of doubt successfully planted, and love triangles seeming to haunt her wherever she goes, Christina starts to question the nature of her relationship with Owen.
Ultimately, in a really great scene, Meredith confronts Owen about his feelings for Teddy. Meredith explains to Owen, that if he is a “good guy,” he will come clean to Cristina about his throwing Teddy under the bus, when her job was on the line, and then lying about it. In true Grey’s fashion, Teddy, of course, overhears all of this. But to her credit, no trace of a sh&t-eating grin can be found on her face, upon hearing the good news.
Nor does she break into song, belting out, “You really LIKE me! You think I’m SEXY! You want to DATE me!”
Color me impressed. Ultimately, Owen confesses his lie to Cristina. And when she outright asks him whether he is in love with Teddy, he says, articulately, “I don’t know.” (Perhaps he should get a new therapist. Because, clearly, the one he has now is not doing a good job, writing his “lines” for him.)
At the end of the episode, in a scene highly reminiscent of early Grey’s, a torn-up Cristina crawls into bed with Meredith and admits that she and Owen are no longer moving in together. Meredith changes the subject, but does so in a sweet way, by showing Cristina the plans for her and Derek’s house in the woods, where there is a separate room for Cristina to crash whenever she find herself in need of a hug . . .
Awww!
Relationships are like ducks . . .
Things were going significantly better for new couple, Alex and Lexie, this week, at least, on the surface. After expending WAY too much mental energy on the recent sexual rendezvous of her ex- Sloan, especially, for a person who claims to be “over him,” Lexie decides it might be a good idea to issue Alex an ultimatum on the state of their sort-of relationship. And, while normally, such an ultimatum, would have sent Alex running for the hills . . .
Running shirtless . . . (Oh come on, as if a picture like that EVER needs a proper recap tie-in to be included!)
. . . New and Improved Alex responds by making out with Lexie in public AGAIN. Once they are done swapping spit with one another, he tells her. “Yeah, we are a thing. Whatever.” (OK, I’m thinking that Owen’s inarticulate therapist is writing Alex’s lines too. How about you?)
Later, when Meredith questions Alex about the nature of his relationship with Lexie, he explains that he is acting like . . . a duck.
Because ducks are sexy . . . (Awesome pic “borrowed” from marginalnotes btw)
Although the metaphor was, admittedly, a bit unclear, I think Alex was referring to the whole, “If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and acts like a duck, it’s probably a duck” thing. In other words, act like you are in a healthy relationship, and soon you will actually find yourself in one. Ummm . . . yeah, I’m not so sure about that, Alex . . .
And apparently, Lexie isn’t so sure either. When Mark professes his love to her, at the end of the episode, Lexie doesn’t immediately jump his bones, but she doesn’t put up much of a fight either. “I have a boyfriend,” says Lexie, half-heartedly.
“But I’m telling you that you could have a husband,” replies Most-Articulate-Male-of-this-Episode, Mark (maybe more like a Dad than a husband, but, like Alex says, “Whatever”).
It’s definitely a May – December Romance. But in terms of “couple names,” “Sexie” TOTALLY kicks “Lalex”‘s butt!
So they’ve got that going for them, at least.
The Medical Stuff
You know what was really interesting about this week’s three “medical mysteries?” They all got SOLVED!
. . . and NOBODY DIED!
. . . and that burn victim chick got her hair back!
It was the happiest hospital day EVER at Seattle Grace! First, we got to meet an awesome star from Happy Days!
“What? You were expecting, The Fonz?”
It’s Mommy Marion Ross! She still looks pretty good! And, apparently, I wasn’t the only one who thought so! In a series of events that ONLY happens on TV, Marion Ross’s character, Betty, is in the hospital, getting . . . something done . . . not sure what . . . when she runs into Cute Old Dude Henry, her long lost love, who she hasn’t seen in 50-years.
They are eachother’s “one that got a way.” Now, with no more obstacles standing between them (because all of those obstacles, unfortunately, are now DEAD), Betty and Henry decide to move in together (once they get out of the hospital, of course), and give their relationship a go. I know, it sounds kind of lame, but it was actually really sweet. And Cute Old Dude Henry had a voice that sounded like it narrated fairy tales for a living, so that made it even sweeter . . .
We also got to meet a burn victim in the hospital, who was supposed to get a hair regrafting (she had lost most of it in a car explosion), when she learns that she has an infection on her arm, and needs her fingers amputated. At first, the doctors tell her that her infection will prevent her from getting the hair regrafting operation. But then, they decide, RISKS be damned, HAIR IS IMPORTANT!
And so they do the grafting during the hand amputation. Of course, had Burn Victim Girl appeared in ANY OTHER episode, aside from this one, this would have been a perfect opportunity for the writers to senselessly kill her off, and manipulate us fans into tears. ( And we know how Grey’s LOVES the tears!) However, Burn Victim Girl was lucky, because she got to star in an episode entitled “Shiny HAPPY People.” And because HAPPY people tend to be, more often than not, ALIVE, she got to live too!
Finally, in what was the best “medical mystery” of the episode, Demi Lovato . . .
HEY! What did I say about referring to that film again?
Sorry . . . Demi Lovato . . .
. . . enters the hospital as a teen diagnosed with schizophrenia, who was admitted to the hospital after, literally, trying to claw her eyes out! Everyone at the hospital thinks she’s a TOTAL nutjob, except this guy . . .
Sigh!
Who, instead, assumes she must have some extremely rare disease. (After all, those have been conveniently traveling around Grey’s in search of likeable guest stars patients since Season 1). Alex runs some initial tests on the teen, and comes up empty handed. He then confronts his girlfriend with the photographic memory, Lexie-pedia, with his patient’s symptoms. Intially, she can’t remember where, in the many medical books she has memorized, she saw the disease. “Lexie-pedia is FROZEN!” Alex complains. (I LOVE HIM!)
But then Lexie remembers that the disease can be found in some obscure medical journal from 2004 with a light green cover. In the next scene, we watch as Alex outfits the teen in this weird scary head gear, that makes her look like Johnny Five from those old Short Circuit films . . .
As if, on cue, Demi’s eyes go all buggy, and she freaks out. So, of course, this was all Karev needed to diagnose her as having a small hole in her inner ear, that allowed her to hear everything that was going on inside her body. YUCK! Apparently, all this rare disease takes to cure, is a brief operation where the hole is plugged up. After the operation, we know that Demi is sane again, because she is wearing a bandage around her head that looks like a really stylish headband . . .
Dear Demi,
Now that your “sane,” I’d really like my headband back.
XOXO
Blair Waldorf from Gossip Girl
In Other News . . .
. . . Callie and Arizona shared an impromptu sexy makeout session in the elevator . . .
Ooh, la, la!
But accomplished precisely NOTHING in terms of their relationship . . .
Boo, la, la 😦
Oh, and the Gas Man . . .
This pic NEVER gets old . . .
. . . told Bailey . . .
. . . that even though he sometimes flirts with random nurses, he saves all the GOOD flirting for her . . .
So, there you have it, “Shiny Happy People,” in a nutshell. This was the LAST new episode of Grey’s before the show airs it’s purportedly “game-changing” two-hour season finale (with the hours entitled “Sanctuary” and “Death and all of His Friends,” respectively) next week. Media sites have teased that the final two episodes of Season 6, will feature nothing less than a SHOOTING and a fairly major character death. Here’s a sneak peak at the promo . . .
Thanks for the video, adam9316!
I’ll admit it. I’m afraid . . . very afraid! See you next week!
This week’s installment of Grey’sAnatomy was just FILLED with squirm-inducing, uncomfortable moments. Moments that were just ASKING for someone to say or do the wrong thing, out of sheer discomfort. So, it was probably a good thing that the episode began with the Seattle Grace staff taking a crash course in sensitivity training, led by “The Nazi” herself, Miranda Bailey.
“I pity the fool who’s INSENSITIVE around my patients!”
Here are just some of the awkward moments that our favorite doctors coped with this week . . .
Have 700-pound man, CAN’T travel . . .
Mere minutes after the crew concluded their half-assed class in sensitivity training, a 700-pound patient was delivered to Seattle Grace on the back of a flat bed truck. In addition to some of the more obvious complications generally associated with carrying that much extra weight (heart conditions, breathing problems, diabetes, immobility, gout etc.), the patient also had a less obvious condition that was life threatening and required medical care. Namely, a seriously heinous-looking rash was developing beneath his many layers of skin tissue and fat.
And let me tell you, for those of you out there who are trying to diet, leave this episode on your DVR queue. When the episode started, I was chowing down on my favorite cereal — two minutes later I had COMPLETELY lost my appetite!
Watch TV, make this face, LOSE WEIGHT! It’s that simple!
When I started to write this recap, I was torn as to whether I would post pictures of the 700-pound man. After all, I do have access to them. And they would certainly help you, the reader, get a better idea of what our doctors were faced with. Yet . . . quite frankly . . . it was GROSS! And my blog has been so pretty up until this point — pretty and filled with hot shirtless men who weighsignificantly less than 700 pounds. Like, for example, Justin Chambers (who plays Karev on the show) . . .
So did I really want to do this to my readers and my blog?
Now . . . before you start calling ME insensitive (Shallow? Maybe. But insensitive? Definitely not) . . . I should tell you that the actor who played the 700 – pound man is not actually 700 pounds. In fact, he is a very charming, sort of attractive, character actor named Jerry Kernion. Here’s his REAL picture, sans fat suit.
But the makeup department at Grey’s Anatomy did an almost TOO GOOD job of making the guy you see above, frighteningly obese and rash-filled. What’s more, if I posted the actual picture, you might be so disturbed by it that you would miss the point that show was trying to make. After all, the patient, named Bobby, was so sweet, self-depracating, and genuinely likeable, throughout the episode, that, after a while, you stopped seeing him as the grotesque product of latex and a BIG FAT SUIT, and more as a jolly chubster like this . . .
So that’s what I’ve ultimately decided to do. Whenever I refer to the 700-pound Bobby in this blog, you will get a picture of The Nutty Professor for your viewing pleasure. You’re welcome. Anyway, back to the show . . .
So, 700-pound Bobby . . .
. . . is being surprisingly light-hearted about this whole thing, smiling and cracking jokes, as the hospital staff pokes and prods him like an animal. But the staff is so freaked out by their predicament, and so petrified of being thrown off the case for making insensitive remarks, that they come off as cold and distant. Bailey tosses out Christina and Dr. “Hotness” Avery . . .
Sigh . . .
. . . within about two minutes, for making fat jokes under their breath. And that random Frankenstein-y Mercy West doc follows shortly after, for comparing Bobby to a rhinocerous. But by far the Most Insensitive Comment of the Evening Award goes to Nu-Chief Shepherd, who suggests that the patient be sent home to die because, “Why should we expend our time and resources to care for a patient who doesn’t even both to care for himself?”
Special thanks go out to smileymileyfan35for this awesome compilation!
Ultimately, Dr. Less-Than-Dreamy reconsiders his earlier position, when we learn that Bobby’s wife is pregnant.
This, of course, raises the inevitable question of HOW? Down at the hospital cafeteria, home to some of Grey’s Anatomy’s most humorous moments, including this one . . .
Thanks LightSpectre!
. . . the Grey’s crew tries to figure out the logistics of a sex act between a 700-pound man and a 120ish pound woman. Karev even resorts to using a “model.”
Unfortunately, for Karev, Bobby’s wife ALSO eats in the cafeteria, and she hears the entire exchange! OUCH! To her credit, this woman slays the crew with kindness. With a smile on her face, she tells them that she would be happy to let them in on the logistics of her sex romp provided the rest of the group share their sexual kinks. “Then again, it’s probably none of my damn business,” she concludes icily, before stalking away.
She sure showed them . . .
Later Alex confronts the wife to apologize, but she is understandably non-receptive. “You didn’t know him before this,” she explains. “To me, he’s still the same man I married. All he’s been trying to do all day is make you laugh, and you’re all so disgusted by him, you can’t even crack a smile. I thought you could help him. But you’re just making it worse.”
Taking the woman’s speech to heart, Alex visits Bobby . . .
. . . who is now convinced he wants to die. “No child deserves a father like this,” says Bobby. “It would be better if he didn’t know me at all.”
Alex eases the tension by exchanging a few fat jokes with Bobby. He then gives him some tough love, explaining that a decision to die would be a selfish one. He would be leaving his wife to clean up a “700-pound mess.” Alex ultimately convinces Bobby to go through with the risky surgery by saying, “at least your wife and kid would know you tried.”
After a few nerve-wracking hiccups, Bobby survives the surgery and vows to make some major lifestyle changes. We hope he does, because we like our Nutty Professor a lot . . .
. . . and we want to keep him around.
The Gossip, The Big Fat Liar . . . and Meredith
When Gossip Girl Derek . . .
. . . makes an offhand comment to Meredith about Owen refusal to support Teddy, when her job was on the line last week, he puts his Post-It Wife in a BAD position. On one hand, Derek is her sort-of husband, and she should generally keep his confidences. On the other, Christina is her best friend. And if her best friend is dating a Big Fat Liar (Owen told Christina he had helped Teddy keep the job), she has a right to know about it. To Meredith’s credit, she initially keeps her mouth shut. But when she overhears Teddy THANKING Owen for his help and support, she can’t help but toss a withering look his way.
And so, like a petulant child, with his hand caught in the cookie jar, Owen . . .
Sergeant D-Bag
. . . reacts defensively by kicking Meredith off his surgical team for no apparent reason, and freaking out on Derek for divulging his confidences. Derek confronts Meredith and the two get into a heated argument about the importance of openness and confidentiality in a marriage. However, I’m with Meredith on this one. If Derek didn’t want Post-It Wife to react to information that was obviously pertinent to the life of her best friend, he just plain shouldn’t have told her. BAD DEREK!
Divorce Papers, PDAs and Foreplay
I know, I know . . . this is an OLD pic. Just imagine Lexie with blonde hair, OK?
So Izzie finally sent Karev the divorce papers (because Katherine Heigl is off the show). And Karev didn’t seem to think that this was pertinent information to share with girl he’d been screwing for the past four or five episodes. But when Meredith tries to discuss it with him, Lexie overhears. OOPS! And she’s pissed! When confronted with the issue, both halves of the screwing bunnies claim that their relationship is just about sex. However, at the end of the episode, when Karev is signing the divorce papers and Lexie stops by, he plants a big sloppy wet one on her in public, which, in Grey’s world, equals TRUE LOVE!
(at least until someone better comes along . . .)
Breaking up is Hard to Do . . .
We all knew it was coming. It was just a question of when it would happen and how it would arise. Honestly, the circumstances that brought about the Callie / Arizona breakup seemed a bit contrived to me. But that didn’t make it any less heartbreaking when it happened.
So, there was this cheeky little bike riding chick in the hospital who needed a knee repair. And she starts TOTALLY hitting on Callie hardcore. This was REALLY ballsy of the chick, I think, because (1) Callie is her doctor; and (2) your gaydar has to be PRETTY fine-tuned to pick up on Callie Torres’ same-sex tendencies. I mean, she’s not exactly this guy . . .
Before leaving the hospital, the biker chick writes her telephone number in permanent marker on Callie’s hand. (What, no cell phone? Is this another 80s flashback episode, and I just didn’t know it?) So, Callie, being the passive aggressive gal she is, shows Arizona the number and says, “Every time I looked at this girl, I just kept wondering if she might want to have a baby someday.” (Riiiiiiight . . . because that’s the first thing I think about, when I find myself attracted to a perfect stranger . . . FERTILITY.)
After hearing this, Arizona agrees to move out of the apartment that the couple shares. The two lovers cry, while hugging it out. Love sucks!
“I miss my dad.”
Speaking of crying, Sandra Oh had me bawling like a baby this week. It all started when she was asked to watch over a little girl who’s mother had experienced a heart attack. While the mother is undergoing tests, Christina bonds with the little girl — so much so, that when the mother is rushed into surgery, Christina chooses to comfort the crying child, instead of operating on her mother.
While the pair is playing cards, the little girl asks Christina what will happen if her mother dies. Just as she is asking this, Avery enters the room, and silently lets Christina know that the little girl’s mother did not make it through surgery.
Trying to keep her face impassive, Christina replies, “If your mother dies, you will blame yourself. You will think that you did not do enough to help her. But that is not true. You did everything you could. Remember that. And it’s going to hurt everytime you think about her. But, over time, it will begin to hurt a little less. Until, one day, you will find that you can think about her, without it hurting much at all.”
(And, wow, I just cried typing that.)
Avery . . .
Sigh . . . Are any of you routing for an eventual Christina / Avery pairing, as much as I am?
. . . who overheard Christina’s speech, confronts her about it, wondering about whether she had experienced a similar death in the family, at a yong age. (Long-time viewers, like myself, know that her father died in a car accident, when she was very young. Christina was in the car and had to watch him die. It was this experience that prompted Christina to eventually become a doctor.)
Christina sloughs it off, claiming that she was merely “kicking ass at sensitivity training.” However, later, when Meredith approaches Christina, she roughly pushes her away, asking to speak to Owen. When Owen enters the room with her, she breaks down, “I miss my dad,” she admits tearfully.
(And I just starting crying AGAIN, as I typed that. Hormones much?)
While I go find some tissues, I’m going to leave you with this clip from next week’s installment of Grey’s Anatomy, which guest star’s Disney darling, Demi Lovato, as a schizophrenic patient with a penchant for self-mutilation.
Thank you Bluesky1234 for the late-breaking video!
This week’s installment of Grey’s Anatomy was all about making choices. The episode also featured a lot of “baby talk” . . .
. . . and not nearly enough shirtlessness and/or sex for my taste . . .
A Shirtless Justin Chambers is a TERRIBLE thing to waste!
As is a Shirtless Jesse Williams, for that matter!
What choices did our characters make this week? Let’s analyze, shall we?
To Grandpa, or Not to Grandpa . . .
In the past, Mark Sloan has been known throughout Seattle Grace as the Resident Man Child, a walking Mid-Life Crisis in Scrubs, if you will. The moments he wasn’t in the operating room (and, let’s face it, we almost NEVER see this guy operate), Mark could typically be found trolling for women . . . .
. . . making sexually suggestive (and slightly creepy) comments to anyone who would listen,
“Hey baby, did I ever tell you about the big yacht I own? It’s IN MY PANTS!”
. . . and starring in sex tapes with actresses and call girls . . .
(Oh, wait . . . that last one only happened in REAL life)
However, lately, viewers have begun to notice a “softer side” of Mark Sloan. During the last few episodes, Mark has been toying with the idea of settling into a serious relationship, and starting a family. This idea was first brought to the forefront a few episodes back, when Mark’s long lost 18-year old daughter, who he heretofore never knew existed, arrived on the scene and announced she was pregnant.
Mark and his daughter (Little Sloan) had previously discussed Mark raising his grandchild on his daughter’s behalf. However, Little Sloan got cold feet, and decided to put the baby up for adoption. In the opening scenes of this episode, Little Sloan arrives on Mark’s doorstep about to give birth. Fortunately for Little Sloan, Mark lives in Doctor Central. So, she didn’t even need to go to the hospital to deliver her baby. Dr. Teddy Altman . . .
. . . (who Sloan just so happened to be screwing, while his daughter’s water was breaking all over his Welcome Mat), delivered the child, with nothing more than a pair of scissors and a bunch of towels. Once the baby was born, a highly hormonal Little Sloan began to have second thoughts about giving it up for adoption.
And despite the fact that Little Sloan had Bad Mommy written all over her (Her idea of “baby gifts” was a messy purse filled with enough lame dollar store doodads to LITERALLY choke a baby! These “bite-sized” toys might as well have had “Swallow Me and Die” written on their surfaces), Big Sloan seemed to think it was a GREAT idea! He was thrilled at the prospect of being able to have a grandchild in his life. Fortunately, Arizona stepped in to show him the error of his ways.
In a heart-wrenching scene, Mark is forced to hand the child over to his new adoptive parents. Once it is all over, he and his daughter vow to remain a part of one another’s lives. So, it seems as though Seattle Grace’s most immature resident may have FINALLY grown up. (Oh, and did I mention that Little Sloan was significantly less annoying this week, than she has been in past episodes?)
Oh Baby or No Baby . . .
Speaking of Arizona . . .
. . . she and Callie seemed to be having baby issues of their own this week, since Callie wants to have a child, and Arizona doesn’t. Throughout the episode, Callie tried a number of tactics to get Arizona aboard the Baby Train.
First Callie tried guided imagery. “Picture a beautiful baby,” she prodded.
“I’m picturing a trip to Spain, a glass of Sangria, and you in a bikini,” replied Arizona. “Oh, wait. We can’t go to Spain . . . or DRINK, because of the BABY!”
Callie then tried to psychoanalyze Arizona, patronizingly explaining to her that the real reason Arizona didn’t want a child was that she was afraid it would get sick and die, like Arizona’s own brother, or the babies she treats at the hospital each day. Arizona is offended by Callie’s insinuations. “I’m not broken. . . I just don’t want a child,” Arizona explains, before storming out of the room.
And even though the couple seemingly made up at the episode’s conclusion, I am not entirely sure that this is something they will be able to overcome, in the long term.
To Be a D-Bag, or NOT to be a D-Bag . . .
Remember all those times, when Seattle Grace was in financial trouble, and Derek self-righteously lectured Chief Webber on the importance of not letting the interests of money and prestige override the need for a comfortable work environment, where doctors can work together as a team? Remember that “Back to School” episide, where Derek tried to demonstrate that Seattle Grace was, above all, a “teaching hospital”? Well, it appears, that “power corrupts,” because the Derek of this week’s episode has completely turned his back on everything he once believed.
For what seemed like the umpteenth time in the past few seasons, ANOTHER “Cardio God” entered the hallowed halls of Seattle Grace. And, once again, the typically tough-as-nails, Cristina Yang, turned into a puddle of sycophantic mush around him. Karev was right when he said she treated well-renown doctors like trading cards . . .
Collect them all!
At least Cristina is not afraid to ADMIT her flaws. (I loved when she called herself a Cardiothoracic Whore!) This, unfortunately, is more than I can say for Derek . . .
Apparently, Seattle Grace is still in need of a Head of Cardiologogy. And while, Teddy, who has been performing the job on temporary contract, would seem to be the most likely choice for the job, the prospect of getting a bigger name (in this case, “Dr. Evans”) to fill the position, put dollar signs in McDreamy’s puppy dog eyes.
In Derek’s defense, a skittish Teddy was screwing up all over the place, this week, sneezing on patients and failing to recognize that they were suffering from sepsis, before operating on them. And, yes, the DULL Dr. Evans did seem like a “good surgeon.” However, he was a Crappy Teacher, forcing Cristina to sit on the sidelines and watch a surgery she had scrubbed in on, while he performed the entire thing on his own. Not to mention that the absence of the well-liked Teddy would have certainly caused a good deal of upheaval amongst many of the doctors — most notably, Mark Sloan who she is currently screwing. Under normal circumstances, a doctor’s popularity and good teaching skills should not be the sole reasons for her getting a job. However, for a Chief who got HIS job on a platform of “education and togetherness,” such reasons should certainly be persuasive ones.
Fortunately, for Teddy, she ultimately got to keep her job. However, at the end of the episode, when Old Chief Webber makes a point to congratulate Shepherd on his decision to award loyalty over prestige, Derek defiantly admits that he had originally offered Dr. Evans the job, not Teddy. However, Dr. Evans passed on it. I’m not a fan of what “chiefing” is doing to Derek’s character . . . Here’s hoping that Old Chief Webber resumes his post REALLY SOON!
“Sober up quick, Chief McBoozy! We need YOU!”
To Threesome, or Not to Threesome . . .
In other D-baggyish news, Owen came VERY close to cheating on Cristina, by almost making out with a vulnerable Teddy, in an admittedly sweet elevator scene. Interestingly enough, THESE actions are NOT the ones with which I take issue. After all, Owen ultimately DID NOT cheat (only because his pager went off . . . but still). And, Owen and Teddy do have chemistry and a strong history together, so I can understand his moment of weakness.
What I COULD NOT abide, was what Owen did NEXT. In a highly uncharacteristic move, Cristina plays the Girlfriend Card with Owen, asking that he plead Teddy’s case to McDreamy, so she can keep her job. Owen AGREES to do this. However, once he gets inside the Chief’s office, he pleads DR. EVANS’s case instead, asserting that Teddy would be “just fine” if Derek didn’t choose her for the position. One could argue that Owen truly believed that Dr. Evan was the “better man” for the job. However, I think this had more to do with Owen’s own concerns that he won’t be strong enough to not make out with Teddy, the next time the two of them are stuck in an elevator . . . And, if that ‘s the case, that seriously SUCKS for BOTH Teddy and Cristina!
To Grow Some Balls or NOT to Grow Some Balls . . .
In still MORE D-bag news, Alex treated his sort-of girlfriend Lexie like total crap this entire episode, berating her, making fun of her, and STEALING her surgeries. When Lexie solves a medical mystery and ALMOST allows Alex to steal her thunder, it takes a tough love speech from Bailey (Doesn’t it always?), for Lexie to finally realize that she is being mistreated. At the end of the episode, Lexie confronts Alex, by giving him a serious “I AM WOMAN, HEAR ME ROAR” – type talking to.
Alex seems impressed. He even gives Lexie a beer. And you KNOW how boys hate parting with their beer. But was it too little, to late?
Finally, in Bat-Sh&t Crazy News . . .
. . . April continued to awkwardly fawn over the married Dr. Shepherd, much like the creepy school girl she played in that Glee episode a few months back . . .
I LOVED how Dr. Avery, a.k.a. Dr. Hotness . . .
. . . totally called her out on her freak show behavior, not to mention skewered her with a few spot on impersonations. “Oh, Chief Shepherd, you can spank me if I’m wrong. And I DO hope I’m wrong!” He mimicked.
(Could somebody in the writing staff PLEASE give the funny and adorably sexy Jesse Williams more to do on this show? A storyline? A relationship? A surgery? ANYTHING AT ALL? Need I remind you what he looks like with his shirt off?)
Anyway, methinks the slow boil of Bat Sh&t Crazy April is about to bubble over REALLY soon. So, Derek should definitely hide his meat cleavers . . .
. . . and his BUNNIES . . .
. . . both in the literal AND the metaphoric sense. You can spank me if I’m wrong. And I DO hope I’m wrong . . .
Hey boys and girls! This week’s episode of Grey’s Anatomy has been brought to you by the letter “B.”
B is for . . .
Baby,
Bromance,
Brothers (who BEAT eachother up),
Bereavement,
Broken,
Banging (even though you are both hung up on other people), and
Bat-sh*t Crazy!
Let’s revisit, shall we?
Baby Talk (and Talk, and Talk, and Talk . . .)
Man, was there A LOT of talk about babies during this episode! The Grey’s Anatomy writers certainly know how to take a “theme” and beat it to death, don’t they? Let’s see . . . BABIES . . . Derek wants one . . .
and Meredith doesn’t (because she is afraid she will be a Bad Mommy), but then she changes her mind, and decides she wants one after all. . .
Callie ALSO wants one (and has been TALKING about it nonstop for about FOUR episodes now, which is REALLY grating on my nerves), but Arizona still doesn’t.
Bailey HAS one, but he seems to disappear and reappear at the writers’ convenience.
And Little Sloan, who I was REALLY REALLY hoping thought was gone for good, is HAVING one, right on McSteamy’s doorstep, at the episode’s conclusion. Ummm . . . yeah, there’s not really much more I want to say on this topic. Put a fork in it, Grey’s. IT’S DONE!
The Bro-mantic Adventures of Mer and Karev . . .
Grey’s Anatomy has always been a show about relationships, with a little medicine thrown in for good measure. Obviously, the relationships that receive the most screen time tend to be the romantic ones, like the relationship between Meredith and McDreamy.
On occasion, Grey’s will also treat us to platonic GIRL-friendships, like the relationship between Meredith and Christina.
But what often gets short shrift on this show are the bromances – those fist-bumping, noogie-giving, non-emotive grunting, platonic relationships between DUDES. And THAT is what we got treated to during “Sympathy for the Parents.” Yes, technically, Meredith is a GIRL, but her relationship with Alex Karev (which continues to be one of my favorite dynamics on the show) is much more bromantic than anything else.
“So, how about those Yankees?”
Meredith and Karev relate to one another in that special monosyllabic way that only DUDES can. Without a word exchanged, Karev knew that in order to resolve her inner turmoil about having kids, Meredith needed to be told that she was nothing like her mother. Just as Karev needed to be told that HE was nothing like his father. And when Karev’s brother appeared at Seattle Grace out of no where, and EVERYONE was prying into Karev’s home life, Meredith, Queen of the Dysfunctional Family Club, knew to stay out of his way. In her own, quiet, and non-judgmental way, Meredith supported Karev throughout this episode, subtly steering him toward the betterment of his relationship with his estranged brother.
Brotherly Love and Bizarre Belly Buttons
That is NOT a weiner . . .
By far, the best and most intriguing storyline of the evening went to Resident Badass Hottie, Alex Karev.
Mmmmmmmmmmm . . . yummy!
Who knew he had a cute younger brother and a sister, both of whom he hadn’t seen in seven years? Who knew he was a foster kid, with an abusive dad and mentally ill mom? Who knew he spent some time in juvie for stealing food, because his family was starving? When Alex’s younger brother, Aaron, arrives on the scene, with an umbilical hernia that requires surgery, and no health insurance to boot, all of these little known facts rise to the surface. And yet, Alex still managed to become a doctor and send checks home to his family every month. In the words of Miranda Bailey, “I am impressed” (and a little turned on).
Playing the part of Alex’s blue collar baby bro, Jake McLaughlin did a fabulous job of making his character instantly likeable and relatable. He somehow managed to be both farm-boy polite and intensely masculine, at the same time. When Christina called Aaron “Angel Spawn” to Karev’s “Evil Spawn,” you, as the viewer, totally understood why.
Alex, of course, was none too happy with his Baby Bro for sharing all of this information with his colleagues. Aaron, for his part, was extremely hurt to learn that Alex (1) had gotten married and NOT invited his family to the wedding; (2) had a wife with cancer; and (3) was getting a divorce. The two manly men threw down, right in the middle of Seattle Grace. And I know we were supposed to be upset and saddened by this. But I LOVE a good boyfight (so sexy), and cheered in spite of myself.
Fortunately, Aaron’s surgery goes off without a hitch. And the two brothers ultimately bond with one another, as Alex explains that he needs to stay away from his family in order to continue to support them financially. In a super sweet moment that nearly brought a tear to my eye, Alex told Aaron that Little Bro had turned out to be a “good guy.” Awwww . . .
Bereavement sucks . . .
In the chief medical storyline of the evening, a wife with cancer suffered a stroke that left her in a vegetative state, following surgery. Because she had signed a DNR-type document, Seattle Gracers were forced to pull the plug on this woman, against the wishes of her husband, who refused to accept her death. The whole thing was pretty heartbreaking and intensely hard to watch. So as not to further depress myself, that’s all I’m going to say about that . . .
Broken People Suck Too . . .
When Arizona described Owen as a mopey guy who never smiled, she WASN’T kidding. Owen Hunt spent all of last week’s episode miserable, and all, but about two seconds, of this one (Dude DOES seem to enjoy cooking . . .:)) in the same sorry state. Don’t get me wrong, Kevin McKidd is giving spectularly complex performances week after week. But the writers REALLY NEED to slip some Happy Pills into this character’s coffee, pronto!
When the episode opens, Owen is all distracted, mopey and PTSD-y, after last week’s traumatic war flashback revisit. However, he refuses to talk to Christina about it and balks at the idea of returning to therapy. Teddy, who can sort of relate to what Owen is going through, having worked on the battle field herself, desperately wants to help Owen, but fears intruding on his relationship with Christina. When Christina makes a mistake during surgery, and Owen freaks out on her, Teddy advises Christina not to demand too much from Owen at this time.
Later, when Owen becomes angered over a cooking mishap, and Christina instinctively shrinks from him in fear, Owen finally admits he has a problem and agrees to get help.
Banging a.k.a. “Pounding the Cake”
Sloan and Teddy had some sex during this episode. They repeatedly described it as “mindblowing,” but it kinda looked lukewarm to me. I just don’t see the chemistry between these two. Plus, it’s OBVIOUS that Teddy still has the hots for Owen. And McSteamy remains hung up on Lexie. In other (more important) news, I learned a kickass new euphemism for sex.
“Pounding the cake” . . . I just KNOW this one is going to come in handy one day (possibly during next week’s recap?)
Welcome to Bat-Sh&t Crazytown – Population: April
“I refuse to be ignored, McDreamy.”
OK, so I found April’s behavior during this episode to be completely bizarre. Apparently, many of you felt the same way, because my blog was just crawling with “April and Derek” searches, even before I posted this blog entry (and even before I had watched this episode). Let’s see: there were those eerily creepy wide-eyed stares she gave him every time he passed her way, the evil looks she shot Meredith, whenever the latter and Derek were acting lovey-dovey, the abrupt way she left the room in tears after Derek’s speech to the comatose patient’s husband, and her overly defensive response to Lexie when she was called out on her “crush.”
Now, if this was any other show, my first guess as to what was going on here would be that the Mean Ole Sort-of Married Doctor is having a forbidden affair with his young resident. But I don’t think this is the case here. After all, Shondra Rhimes KNOWS that if she makes Derek into a cheater after ALL this time (with a former MERCY WESTER no less), “Mer and Der” shippers will literally burn down her house!
The next, most logical, explanation would be that April’s character is merely in the throes of innocent puppy love. In such case, the bizarro creepiness element to it all, would be merely the result of bad over-acting. However, I am already familiar with Sarah Drew’s work. And I happen to know that this actress is a Total Pro when it comes to subtly portraying the agony of unrequited love. I watched her do it during teen drama, Everwood, where she played the shy and bookish Hannah, who was suffering from a crush on a boy that she was certain was miles out of her league . . .
And she pulled it off again on Mad Men, as a wife who knows in her heart that she is married to a closeted homosexual, who will never return her romantic affections . . .
Nope. My guess is that Sarah Drew’s bizarre portrayal of April during this episode was intentional. After all, this wouldn’t be the first time, the actress has played the role of a creepy obsessed psycho stalker. Anyone else remember her guest-starring role in Glee as the Bat Sh*t Crazy, Teacher Devouring, Susie Pepper?
Something tells me that THIS storyline is FAR from over . . .
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