While You Were Creeping – A Recap of Pretty Little Liars’ “Picture This”

“WOAH!  My Dream Self is a TOTAL HO!  I hope I didn’t just give myself Dream Crabs . . .” 

Welcome back, my Pretties!   This week on Pretty Little Liars, we learned that Spencer still wears My Little Pony sweaters; Emily is great at poker, but sucks at life bluffing; and, even after ALL she’s been through with “A,” Aria STILL hasn’t learned to shut her bedroom door (but not lock it, Byron says “NO LOCKING DOORS!”), and close her curtains, before she goes to bed at night . . .

So, pick up that hide-a-key on top of the doorframe, and slip your digits to your significant other’s best friend, because it’s time for another Pretty Little recap  . . .

To Sleep, Perchance to HUMP . . .

First of all, let me say, SCREW YOU, PLL, for being such a tease!  You gave me, not one, but TWO, fake sex scenes before the opening credits even began!

What kind of show do you think this is . . . True Blood, or should I say . . . Faux Blood?

All I can say is, Aria REALLY didn’t look pleased, when she woke up in the morning.  And, honestly, I think she should reconsider those feelings.  I mean, so what if her second faux-screw toy may very well be a psycho stalker / murderer / pedophile.

You know, I never realized it, but Facelift Jason TOTALLY looks like he’s either going to grab Aria’s boobs, or strangle her, in this picture. 

The way I see it, being Dream F*&ked is the best of both worlds!  You get all of the pleasure, and none of the soreness, STD’s, or soul-crushing guilt real sex can sometimes bring. You also significantly decrease your chances of being BASHED IN THE HEAD WITH A HOCKEY STICK, AND BURIED ALIVE.

Meanwhile, over at the morgue, Hanna, Emily, and Spencer have randomly decided to don those skimpy candy striper outfits again.  Seriously, when did this show become PORN?

SPENCER:  “This is as far as I go.  If they make me put on one of those French Maid costumes, I’m QUITTING!”

Actually, the girls have a pretty good reason to be dressed like they are.  After all, they are currently snooping around the hospital in search of the missing page to Ali’s autopsy.  Of course, I’m pretty sure that my favorite part of the ENTIRE episode, was when the girls were at risk of being caught snooping, and Hanna had to . . .  improvise . . .


(Have I told you guys, lately, how much I adore Hanna?  Girlfriend is friggin HILARIOUS!)

Unfortunately, Spencer emerges from the morgue empty handed.  Someone must have snuck into the hospital, and extracted the missing page, before the PLL girls could get their hands on it.  Of course, as it turns out, missing pieces of paper may end up being the least of the girls’ problems . . .  As they are LOUDLY discussing their plan of action, the girls very nearly run into THIS . . .

*insert T-Rex music from that Jurassic Park movie, here*

That’s right, my Pretties.  Apparently, Blind Jenna might not be BLIND for much longer at which point, we will surely have to find a new nickname for her, STAT!  Any suggestions?.  What does this MEAN for the PLL girls?  (Well, honestly, not much.  Blind Jenna always seemed eerily capable of “seeing” whatever it was the PLL girls were doing, anyway.  But, let’s go along with it, and pretend to be REALLY SCARED.  OK?)

 A Very Important Message from PLL: DON’T DO STEROIDS!  (It might make you turn into Thor . . .)

No offense against THOR . . . or anything . . . 

Back at the Marin Household, Emily is throwing away all of hers and Hanna’s creams, just in case “A” got to them, and pumped THEM up with steroids too.  Hanna spies her throwing a way one cream, in particular, and takes immediate offense . . .

“I don’t care if this cream turns me into Thor, it costs 100 dollars,” lectures Emily.

Emily, of course, reminds Hanna that she STOLE the lotion.  “It still costs 100 dollars!” Hanna replies.  (Remind me why Little Miss Klepto was getting all bent out of shape about Caleb‘s criminal activities again?)

Except when she’s drunk, Emily is not typically known for getting great one liners on the show.  But her response here, definitely makes the list: “Chin hair and back pimples are also side effects of taking steroids.”

My sentiments exactly, Hanna.  I bet “turning into Thor,” is starting to look like a pretty good option, in comparison to THIS, huh? 

Hanna ultimately ends up tossing out her Stolen Contraband Lotion, just as Mama Marin pops in to (1) lecture Hanna about not calling Papa Doucheface; and (2)  invite the girls downstairs for breakfast.

Not surprisingly, the minute Hanna leaves the room, Emily gets yet another text message from “A.”  And THIS one is a doozy . . .

“Well, I certainly hope she paid for me, first!” 

Apparently, sometime, during the course of the last two episodes, “A” managed to steal Emily’s medical chart.  (I’m wondering if he or she needed their very own candy striper outfit to do it too!)

Speaking of Emily, later at school . . .

“You’re Dream Cheating on Fitzy!  (You Bastard!)”


“Stop looking at me like that, Em!  I’m sure I made him wear a Dream Condom!” 

Emily and Aria fill one another in, on the last five minutes of the show.  Though, Aria, at first, does not come clean to Emily about her little sex dream, Emily sees THIS FACE. . .

and THIS ONE . . .

 .  . . and immediately puts two and two together.  (If only she was this good at judging the effectiveness of skin creams, she might not have gotten A HOLE IN HER STOMACH.)  Emily reveals herself as a hardcore TEAM FITZY-ITE, when she tells Aria that she has NO business eyef *&king or dreamf&^*king Facelift Jason, when the Professor is over at Hollis waiting patiently to “make pottery with her.”  Aria promises to keep that in mind and mentally reminds herself to buy some Red Bull, so she can stay awake tonight . . . No sleeping, means no dreamf*&king, right?  Right?

Later, in the lunchroom . . .

“They are taking her eyeballs out?  COOL!”

“I wish someone took MY eyeballs out, so I wouldn’t have to EVER see Blind Jenna hooking up with Policeboy Garrett again . . .”

Spencer (who, because she is dating Toby, is “in the know”) explains to the rest of the girls that Jenna is a candidate for corneal transplants.  This basically means they replace the damaged flap over her cornea, so that she can see again.  (See?  And who says you can’t learn things from watching PLL?)  The girls discuss what exactly this would mean for THEM, which, pretty much, makes them HUGE A$$HOLES.   I mean, really, how DARE Jenna try to get back the vision that the PLL GIRLS TOOK AWAY FROM HER, and inconvenience the Pretty Little Liars?  She’s got SOME NERVE!

“Jenna is scary enough with four senses.  Can you imagine what she will do to us with all five?”  Hanna wonders out loud.

You’re right, Hanna!  Because that would make her ROBO-JENNA, Super Villain EXTRAORINAIRE . . .


Be afraid, PLL’ers . . . Be VERY afraid . . .

 But ROBO Jenna isn’t necessarily the ONLY villain the PLL’s need to worry about . . .

Hide Your Sweater Ponies, Folks!  Facelift Jason has a SECRET ROOM!  (And we all know what that means . . .)

“It’s not safe for you here, Sweater Pony!  RUN!” 

After school, Spencer and her favorite sweater from Grade 4, decide to do what they do best: namely, stalk the Suspect of the Week, Facelift Jason.  Conveniently, Spencer finds Facelift Jason, just as he is hiding the key to his SECRET ROOM in the WORST HIDING SPOT EVER!

“Look at me.  I am soooo clever, with my newly chiseled face, and Pantene Pro V hair . . .”

Nice going, Facelift!  No one will think to look for your hide-a-key in the SAME PLACE EVERYBODY AND THEIR MOTHER HIDES THEIR HIDE-A-KEY!  Did the surgery that changed your face, perhaps, cut into your brain too? 


Oh, how I missed you, Spencer Face!

Meanwhile, over at Hanna’s . . .

“A” Cockblocks Emily, BIG TIME!

The Last Kiss? 

In the land of Too Little, Too Late, Samara brings Sorry You Had a Hole in Your Stomach Cookies to Emily.  Emily takes them gratefully, and doesn’t ask, “Why the hell didn’t you visit me at the hospital, B*tch?” . . . which I thought was rather kind of her.

Speaking of kind . . . enter Mama Marin . . .

“Newly single, and ready to mingle!” 

Hanna’s mom has been racking up SO many cool points recently, that I almost forgot how she once slutted around with Deputy Douchey, so her daughter wouldn’t go to jail for shoplifting, and STOLE MONEY FROM AN OLD LADY . . . almost.  This week, she generously offers her house up to Emily, Samara, and Samara’s friends for “poker night,” when the parties’ usual host cancels, on account of her Mom being sick.  Emily, of course, is thrilled.


Hanna’s mom tells Emily that she should feel at home in the Marin Household, and be able to be “herself.”  This is kind of awesome, especially considering that at Emily’s actual house, her Mom had a TOTAL sh*tfit, when Emily had ONE other lesbian over at her house (Maya!), let alone a group of them.  But I digress .  . .

That night, Emily invites Samara and her Poker Crew over to the Marin household, where she impresses them all with her Mad Poker Playing Skillz . . .


One of Samara’s friends with whom Emily particularly hits it off is “Zoe” . . . a fact that, will come to haunt her, before the night is over . . .

The Bait . . . 

*Insert cell phone ring here* . . . you guessed it!  It’s time for “A” to crash this poker party . . .

 I’m not going to lie, this was the part of the episode that pissed me off the most!  Now, in REALITY, there were LITERALLY TONS of ways Emily could have gotten her number to Zoey, without looking like she was trying to cheat on Samara with one of her closest friends.  For starters, she could have given ALL the girls her number, including Zoe, insisting that she wanted them to have it, in case they were ever again in need of someone to host Poker Night.  She also could have slipped a paper into Zoe’s purse containing her digits.  (If you read the above-message, it says that Zoe has to LEAVE with the number . . . she doesn’t have to KNOW she’s leaving with it.)   She also could have told Zoey, she wanted to plan a romantic surprise for Samara, and needed her help.  I could keep going . . .

But that wouldn’t be “exciting” now, would it?   So, Emily, the same girl, who just two weeks back, cleverly deciphered Great Mystery of the Ian Suicide Note, quickly takes a turn for the moronic, and flirtatiously offers Zoey her number, outright, RIGHT IN FRONT OF Samara’s possessive “friend” Quinn.

“Woah, way to be subtle, Hobag!”

“Rebound sex with Samara, here I come.  Thanks ‘A'”!

(By the way, who the heck cut Quinn’s hair?  Edward Scissorhands?)

Samara is understandably super PISSED when she confronts Emily about what she did . . . so pissed, in fact, that she puts their relationship on indefinite hiatus, until Emily is willing to come clean about what happened at Poker Night . . .

“Is this because I didn’t visit you in the hospital, when you thought you were dying?”

Emily is crushed by the news . . . I think . . .

“Hmmm . . . do you think it’s too early to call Zoey?  I really wish I got her number, last night.” 

And so ends yet another relationship at the hands of “A” . . .  Of course, sometimes PLL girls’ relationships end all on their own . . .

Mama, I’m Coming Home . . .

So, remember how, last week, Hanna kicked the private investigator, who was stalking Caleb to the curb.  But then we learned that his intentions might not have been as bad as she assumed they were?  Well, it turns out the private investigator was searching for Caleb on behalf of his biological MOTHER, who is apparently, some filthy rich country club lady, who lives next door to Oprah!

When the private investigator confronts Caleb, he IS mad.  Why wouldn’t he be?  He’s spent twelve years of his life going from one trailer trash foster home to the next, and was PRETTY MUCH HOMELESS for the last year of his life.  Meanwhile, the woman who “couldn’t take care of him,” is probably putting her two other kids through private school, and weekly tennis lessons with Andy Roddick . . .

But hey, family is family, right?  And Caleb kind of owes it to himself to get a piece of that lifestyle he’s been denied all these years.  (Yes, I’m that cynical.)  Believe it or not, it’s actually Hanna, she of the “Dad you’re dead to me,” perpetual poutiness, who convinces Caleb to give Deadbeat Mommy Dearest a call.  “The worst that can happen is you never speak to her again.  The best thing that can happen is you can finally get to know her.  Both of them are better than what you are doing now.”

“The last time I saw my mom, I was small enough to actually swing on this  swingset, without having to worry about breaking it.”

The next evening, a tearful Caleb comes to Hanna’s house to say goodbye .  . . forever now.  He had a little chat with his Mom that day, and decided he should bring his phone pimping business to Montecito, since eveyone is so rich there come and visit her.  He’s leaving now, as she had a car sent for him (See Caleb, this is how the OTHER HALF LIVES.  Get used to it.)

Hanna is obviously saddened at the thought of losing Caleb.  But, to her credit, she remains strong and supportive, because she knows how hard this must be for him, and that he is doing the right thing.  The couple promise to call one another every day, and Caleb offers to return someday, though Hanna is rightly skeptical about both statements.  “I’ve seen pictures of Montecito,” she says, smiling ruefully.

The two then share a touching kiss goodbye.  And Hanna waits until Caleb is out of sight to REALLY break down in tears . . .

“Man, this episode is depressing!” 

When all is said and done, Hanna decides to reach out to her own dad, and agrees to take part in his wedding to the odious Isabelle.  Way to be an adult, Hanna!

Now, if y’all don’t mind, I’d like to bid adieu to the Haleb relationship with a little GIF tribute . . .

*sniffles*  OK . . . moving on . . .

Speaking of depressing . . .

“I’m just really bummed out about the end of Haleb, OK?”

It seems as though Jerkface Mike has gone from non-existent, to creepy, to klepto, to a$$hole, to suicidal depressive in about three episodes flat . . . (That’s gotta be some sort of record.)  Papa Montgomery, who’s brother (from what I gather) committed suicide as a teen (or maybe he OD’d), is extremely concerned, and rightfully so.

Aria’s mom, on the other hand, who’s usually the less lame parent of these two, sort of seems like she’s in denial about the whole thing.  Now, I’m DEFINITELY thinking that Mike has become just as much a victim of A’s torturing as his sister.  She (or he) has something on him, and I’m guessing it’s pretty big . . .  something that makes home invasion seem like a walk in the park.

Speaking of Aria . . .

Tempted by the Hair of Another . . .

“The truth is Aria.  I’m really a vampire.  And I put dirty dreams into your brain, while you sleep at night.  Then I take pictures of you, and use them while spanking my monkey.” 

So, you want to hear something shocking.  I actually think that all this time that Aria and Fitzy have been dating one another, they NEVER DID THE DEED!

NO!  I’M SERIOUS!   This episode all but gave that information away.  The first piece of evidence, is Aria’s impromptu seduction of Fitzy in his office at Hollis.  She seems determined to screw those Jason dreams right out of her brain . . .


 But Fitzy is oddly hesitant, despite the obvious hard-on he started sporting the minute Aria removed her coat.  “I have class in 15 minutes,” he says, as they start making out hard core . . .


The party quickly moves to the couch.  And that’s where things REALLY get interesting . . .

At this point, most of us are thinking THIS . . .


But then they cut away to another scene, before anyone can get Nekkid . . .

Next thing you know, Aria’s getting A LOT of food out of the vending machine, so . . . post coital munchies, perhaps?

But then Fitzy comes back and he’s FULLY DRESSED, with his TIE ON PERFECTLY.  Hmmm . . . Of course, he COULD have re-dressed himself before class (He only had 15 minutes, after all!).  But then there’s that conversation he has with Aria, where he’s all “concerned” about the reason behind her aggressive seduction, and thinks something is up, and wants to talk about her “FEELINGS.”  Yeah . . . NOT the kind of conversation one has after mindblowing sex . . .

To add insult to injury, we flip to this . . .

Now, we’re talkin!

Fitzy remarks that he wishes Aria could stay at his place every night, and she makes a comment about being REALLY GLAD SHE WAITED.  (In other words: bye, bye Aria’s virginity!  Nice knowing ya!)  But then she walks to the mirror, and the scene changes to THIS . . .

 “You can’t stop thinking about me, can you?” Facelift Jason whispers seductively in Aria’s ear .  . .

AND it’s wake up time . . .

“I’ve really gotta lay off that vending machine food.” 

So, yeah, as unrealistic as it sounds, if Aria’s “first time” occurred IN HER DREAM, than she hasn’t done it yet in real life, which means Fitzy must have the most painful pair of THESE the world has ever seen . . .

  And so the Little Christian Channel that Could subtly transmits its message to the Youth of America.  TEASE!  Now, I’m just wondering if Spencer and Toby have done it yet . . . any guesses?

“I Care About You, so let’s SCREW!


Facelift Jason stops by Aria’s house unexpectedly to put the moves on her to give her little brother, Headcase Mike, his number for “counseling” or something . . .  But close physical contact with Facelift Jason (he fondles her arm, while he’s giving her the card), causes Aria to get those “dream feelings.”  (It’s a good thing girls don’t get hard-ons, you know?)  So, she makes some lame excuse about studying, and kicks a surprised Facelift to the curb.

She seriously looks mesmerized in this scene.  Are we entirely sure Facelift Jason ISN’T a vampire?  It would explain SO MUCH! 

“Invite me in, Aria.  I van’t to suck your blood . . .


“I know a member of my own kind, when I see one.”

Later, Facelift Vampire Jason hunts down Aria in his car, in the middle of the night, and admits that he has feelings for her.  WELL DUHHHHHH!  You couldn’t have made THAT more obvious if you skywrote it across all of Rosewood, boyfriend!

Vampires always drive the nicest cars . . . 

Without waiting for a response to his statement, Facelift Vampire Jason pulls Aria in for a neck sucking kiss, and Aria lingers a bit longer than someone who has NO feelings for a person should.

 *nom-nom, nom*  Tastes like chicken . . .

It all seemed a bit rushed to me.  And I was surprised by how LITTLE game Facelift Vampire Jason has.  Aria might have been surprised too, as she nervously sputters that she is taken, before dashing back to the house . . .

“Rats, foiled again . . .” 

Watching this exchange is Blind Jenna and Police Boy Garrett . . . well, at least ONE of them is watching . . .

The pair express concern that Aria and Jason will “hook up,” and she will get him to remember what happened on the night of Ali’s murder.  This conversation once again seems to confirm my theory that Jason DID NOT kill Ali, but was passed out nearby, when the murder was going down.  Whether B.J. (my new nickname for Blind Jenna . . . like it?) and Police Boy actually COMMITTED the murder themselves, remains to be seen.

Elsewhere, in Sleuthing Spencer Land . . .

Photo Finish

After having a weird conversation with her mother, in which the latter tells her she shouldn’t trust ANY of the Dilaurentis’, and that her father’s decision to DESTROY Ali’s murder weapon was probably the right one, a high strung Spencer commandeers Emily to go snooping around Facelift Vampire Jason’s secret vampire bat cave . . .

Hi, Spencer Face . . . please allow me to introduce you to Emily Face . . .”

What they find in there is a photo dark room, filled with a ton of surveillance equipment, and . . . wait for it . . . photos of close-ups of various parts of Aria’s body taken . . . WHILE SHE WAS SLEEPING . . .


SOMEBODY wears a lot of makeup to bed .  . . 

Spencer and Emily hear Jason returning to the dark room to jerk off, or eat bunnies, your pick and escape just in time, except THEY FORGOT THEIR FLASHLIGHT!  Morons.

“Great!  I needed one of these!”

When they dumbly return to get it, the girls are shocked to find that Jason has cleared the place of everything . . . EXCEPT THEIR FLASHLIGHT!

Spencer Face and Emily Face: The Sequel

The girls frantically try to call Aria to warn her, but can’t seem to get her on the phone.  Will they find her, before Facelift Vampire Jason makes her his Princess of Eternal Darkness?  Only time will tell . . .

In the final moments of the episode, we see Gloved Hand, in the formerly empty dark room developing . . . you guessed it, an incriminating shot of Spencer and Emily breaking into Jason’s shed.  Someone has some EXPLAINING TO DO!

Geez!  I thought “A” was supposed to be all “HI-TECH.”  Why not invest in a digital camera?

And that’s all she wrote, my Pretties.  Next week on PLL . . . THIS . . .

Oh, and yes, Facelift Vampire Jason.  Since you asked, we ARE still afraid of you we just don’t think you actually killed Alison . . .  🙂

See you then!

[www.juliekushner.com][Fangirls Forever]


Filed under Pretty Little Liars

18 responses to “While You Were Creeping – A Recap of Pretty Little Liars’ “Picture This”

  1. sassyfran

    Great Recap as usual. Hey you, I thought I would check out your recap even though am only half done with mine because of my excursion to get a tattoo today. I noticed a couple of places where we had the same ideas again. Emily’s way of giving Zoe her number was one of them; yeah she could have thought of a more subdued way to pass on that piece of paper like just writing down the number in front of everyone. Oh it was interesting to see that just maybe Aria hasn’t slept with Ezra yet; I am not sure if that will change them at this point for the better or not. I think Aria was just curious about kissing Jason, I don’t think she is really into him, its too bad she kissed him on the street. I wonder if anyone will tell Ezra of if she will confess in her innocence? It’s funny I didn’t remember about Hanna being a shop lifter and yet she was all on Caleb case about his business LOL.

    • Hey France! Thanks so much for your comment. Since you asked, here’s a little “primer” I found on Hanna’s little “sticky finger” problem . . .

      Like you was REALLY shocked to learn that Aria and Ezra have never done it . . . not so much because of Aria, but because of Ezra. Remember how quickly those two started going at it in the bar bathroom, during the pilot episode? And THAT was 10 minutes, after they first met! Now, granted, that was before Ezra knew that Aria was a minor. However, I think it illustrated pretty clearly that HE was no virgin. (And while it’s possible that him and his former fiance Jackie were going to “wait until marriage,” somehow, I doubt it.)

      So, as gentlemanly as Ezra seems to be, it seems odd that Ezria has been dating for . . . what . . . six months or so . . . and the issue has never even been broached. It just doesn’t seem all that realistic to me, from a writers’ perspective, given EZRA’S age and requisite experience. But hey . . . um . . . good for them, I guess? (Or, BAD for them, depending on how you feel about such things. :))

      As for Jason, I do think Aria is attracted to him, at least, physically. The dreams seem to suggest as much. Of course, her feelings for him might change very quickly next week, when the girls tell her what they found in his shed . . . It’s bad enough that Aria has to deal with “A” regularly violating her privacy. She certainly doesn’t need to worry about Facelift Vampire Jason doing it too . . . That being said, as I mentioned in your recap, based on past suspects on this show (Toby, Ian), I have a feeling we will soon learn that all is not necessarily as it seems with Jason . . . And that could end up being either a good thing, or a bad one.

      P.S. Good catch about the Arson kiss happening in the street. How much do you want to bed “A” got a shot of that happening, and will eventually use it to blackmail Aria?

      • sassyfran

        Ah Jewls thanks for the video; i see how things work in rosewood 🙂 OH and about A blackmailing Aria yeap I can see that happening, you can’t let your guard down that is certain.

  2. MCRmyMember

    I loved your recap. It was so hysterical, and on-point! 🙂
    Okay, so this episode was seriously depressing. And I have to say, I actually feeel kind of bad for Mike now. I feel like if his lame parents don’t do something soon, he will try and commit a suicide, or something along the lines of that.
    And please do not tell me I was the only person to cry during Hanna and Caleb’s final scene in this episode? Yes, I realize I guessed this would happen last week, but that did not stop my heart from breaking for them. Those ‘I love you’s” killed me. And thank you, for the epic montage of Haleb gifs.But fear not! MY CALEB WILL RETURN!!!! And no, I’m not delusional, I do realize that when most love interests leave, they leave for good, but I have proof!
    Life is good again! 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 x100000000
    And Falcon Boy is back!!!!! I think Ezra finally finds out that the PLL girls know he is seeing Aria, because Spencer jumps into his car to warn him about Jason possibly hurting Aria.
    Speaking of members who are about to be released from the clutches of the Missing Mate Vortex, Maya will return from juvie in episode 11, which is two weeks from now. and here is the article:
    As you can see, I have little life beyond finding spoilers for PLL. 🙂
    i wonder if Samara and Emily will have worked out everything that went on during poker night by then? By the way, did you get the same feeling that i did when they said that Samara’s friend (with benefits) was named Quinn? I hate her on Glee. Just make her prego and insecure, and the world will be good again.
    And Jason. What a creep. i don’t think he killed Ali, because that’s too obvious. Same for Jenna and Garret. I don’t think they are going to have Jenna see again. That would be good, and I agree with you about the PLL’s being seriously selfish about what happened. You would think that they would be happy for her, and not be worrying about what she might do to them, even though they do deserve it. 🙂
    I also heard that we might soon find out some interesting things. For example, WE MIGHT ACTUALLY FIND OUT WHO A IS SOON!!!!
    And here is the article…..
    And because nobody can seem to let go of Deputy Douchey, I have a gift for you…..
    Yep! He’s back in episode 12!!!!!!!!!! I wonder what happened to Officer Mcfriendly-pants? Did they finally figure out he is boning Jenna? More importantly, why are the girls back in the police station? Why are they wearing dirty dresses? And why is Hanna making that face? Now, everyone has a face except for Aria.
    EMILY FACE :000
    SPENCER FACE :00000
    (And yes, this is how I imagine their cartoon faces would look) 😉

    • :)

      haha that was funny! I am so glad that you got those pictures for episode 12…it is about time officer mcsexyyy douche comes back!

    • [I love how Spencer Face gets the most O’s, and Hanna Face is the only one that winks! 🙂 (As for Aria, I’d say Aria Face is the one she makes in the opening credits, when she puts her finger to her lips and says “SHHHH” all wide-eyed.) LOL]

      Hey MCRmyMember! Can I just tell you that you are basically my favorite person on the planet today? THANK YOU SO MUCH for all these juicy PLL spoilers. I’ve lurked around the Wet Paint site quite a bit this season, but was unfamiliar with Hypable. That’s a GREAT site too! I will definitely be checking back on that more often.

      I LOVE that the writers have changed their mind about revealing who “A” is, before the end of the series. I had always felt they made a HUGE mistake, when they said they weren’t going to reveal that until the end of the series. It made made me feel, like there was no point in trying to solve the mystery, if the writers were going to drag it out for 18 seasons (well . . . maybe not 18. The girls would be practically middle aged by then. But . . . you get what I mean.) It’s exciting to know that the writers are at least CONSIDERING letting us in on the answer to one of the show’s two biggest mysteries. Besides, I feel like the characters, writing, and acting on this show are solid enough that it could continue to be successful, even after the original mysteries had been solved. Hey, it worked for the PLL BOOK series! 🙂

      And as much as I shamelessly bashed him in my recaps, you seem to have caught on to my Deep Dark Secret . . . I’m a closet Deputy Douchey Shipper. (What can I say? He looks GREAT in a towel! 😉 So, I was very excited to see that portion of the promo with the girls being interrogated by him again.

      And if Maya is exiting the Vortex and returning from De-Gaying camp, I suspect an interesting triangle will form between Emily-Maya-and-Samara (a love square, if you count Quinn, because it seems pretty obvious, she wants to be MORE than friends with Samara).

      Speaking of triangles, I wonder if, by the time Caleb returns, Hanna will have started to develop feelings for Lucas. Perhaps, the two will comfort one another in Caleb’s absence, one thing will lead to another and . . . Now, THAT would be a storyline, I could seriously get into. 🙂

      Oh, and I think you are on to something regarding Fitzy. He’s always been a bit suspicious of Jason’s intentions with Aria. And Spencer’s warning to him will only serve to confirm what he already seemed to know, in the back of his mind. This could definitely get ugly . . . 🙂

  3. It was a DREAM?! -__- cop out, abc family. This is why I don’t usually watch their tv shows, they give me hives. (Sweet life of an american teenager *shudders*)

    I don’t care if Blind Jenna gets her eyesight back, she will always be Blind Jenna to me.

    Emily, you stupid bint! she could of given her number to Zoey in a MILLION other ways than the one she chose. -__-

    Aw, Chief Powhatan is leaving…no more rain dances in the middle of the woods for poor Klepto Han. (I actually teared up in this scene…I’m so damn emotional)

    WTF?! Pretty Flippy Haired Jason is a STALKER. I HATE THIS SHOW.

    You know what? f&%$ it, PFHJ (pretty flippy haired jason) can stalk me whenever he wants.

    If you can’t already tell I jotted these notes down as the episode was still playing, so excuse my choppy sentences. Toodles!

    • Hey BNick! Man, your comment cracked me up. You gave the characters better nicknames than I did, dammit! *growls with jealousy*

      I think Chief Powhatan is my favorite! 🙂

      Actually, I’ll let you in on a little secret, if Blind Jenna gets her eyesight back, I will probably start calling her the Brotherf*&ker Formerly Known as Blind Jenna. (Is it a long and unwieldy nickname? Absolutely! But it’s also SUPER appropriate . . . though not nearly as funny as Chief Powhatan 😦 )

      I’m still not 100% sure Jason is a stalker. I’m going to hold my judgment, until I see him on a ladder outside Aria’s bedroom window, with a camera and a pair of binoculars . . . 🙂

      • I’m glad you find my statements humorous. I am plagued everyday by my undeniable ability to make those around me cry (from laughter of course…) considering I am a brilliant, and awe-inspiring person who also happens to be f$%king hilarious.

        I’m with you on PFHJ (pronounced- puffhudge) he is still beautiful therefor my feelings about him will not change until he goes all Edward Cullen on me “you talk in your sleep, a lot” ………… -__-

        Don’t get me wrong, I love Twilight, but boy’s creepy as f$%&.


  4. :)

    KJ HILARIOUSSSSSS! I re-read this recap like 5 times! Like seriously, hysterical 🙂 *nom *nom *nom had me lmao 😀 Ohh and seeing Oprah was the icing on the cake!

    Well this episode made me realize that Spencer was barely on the screen, but most importantly that she is too quick to judge! From Toby now to Jason, i mean she almost suspected her own father! Maybe she is hiding something…maybe she is -A!!!! Impossible though because we all…and i mean “I”…know that SAMARA is -A!

    (oooohhhh i just realized that Quinn is from America’s Next Top Model! I knew i recognized her face from somewhere…she is Courtney Davies. Really pretty)

    Anyways, I know most people are going on this pity party for mike because he is apparently suicidal, but honestly I WANT HIM TO KILL HIMSELF! I know that is sooo messed up, but there needs to be more murder more suicides, and i need more F**cked up Drama!….seriously i am thirsty for death on this show! I want heads to roll. BLOOD i tell you! (i promise you i am not satanic of any sort lol)

    On a pleasant tone…man i was soooo happy to read comments from all the Ezria fans on YouTube cuz there is a VERY OBVIOUS attraction between Jason and Aria…and they hate it! I literally jumped with glee 🙂 Arson / Jaria ftw!
    But i am not gonna lie Ezra was smoking hot laying in that bed..fake bed dream? idk but he was fineeeee 🙂 Let the battle between the pretty boys begin!….and end with someone who is not Ezra 😀

    Okay those pictures in Jason’s shed, i really do not know how to even explain them, because obviously when he came downstairs he would have noticed the pictures. And any normal man who was innocent of child pornography would probably be like…..

    A Normal Guy: “WTF are these sexy pictures of an underage girl doing in my house. **looks at the pictures**…..ohh…. my monkey just turned into a full grown gorilla!” **thinks for a while** “Mhmm maybe i should take these pictures and inspect them closely….nicee :)”

    Here was Jason’s reaction…

    Jason: “WTF! Someone just broke into my shed where i contain all my sexy pictures of an underage girl **looks at the pictures**….ohh my monkey just turned into King Kong!!!! **thinks for a while**
    “Mhmm i should probably empty my ENTIRE shed and put the pics on my bedroom ceiling…nicee :)”

    Do you see the difference? Yes.. No…haha probably not! Men all are horny monkeys lol….gotta love em’ ! Anyways, I really believe someone who is living in that house IS -A, because Jason is not alone, and two the ending clips looked to be the work of -A, and the equipment that was in the shed were mysterious as well. I really hope he wasn’t involved with those pictures, because i just want all those EZRIA fans to sUcK iT!
    (I apologize if it relates to you, but this is mostly for all those YouTube haters lol…) 🙂

    Caleb had me in tears…i know he tried really hard to produce those invisible tears, but the effort is what counts! It is really funny though, because he is departing ONLY because he has to produce that new movie/show idk called WICKED or something…and he plays some main role! Very clever Marlene King…very clever! He will be back, hopefully with a more manly hair…cut 😉

    Whooop Whoooppp! Samara is gone! You don’t even know how happy i was when she dumped Emily! Lol she just made it sooo easy for Maya to come back 🙂 i am uber pumped! You know what would be better is if they bring back Ben and his adorable raping-self back to the show! I want him to like try and harass Emily again….you know because his ego was knocked down for being dumped for a girl! I want hell to break loose 8) ohhh yeahhh! (wow i am just babbling now….that was too far)

    Anyways to end this loooonggg book..(sorry about that) i want to say thanks for allowing me to see the comical side of this depressing episode…and i do mean depressing! Much love KJ. Keep Writing


  5. Hey Eeyore! Happy Thursday! For some odd reason, I have STILL not commented on Surface Tension. The jet lag from South Carolina and the pain meds for my sprained ankle had me fast asleep by eight all last week. I’ll try to by tomorrow. BTW, when re-watching 2X08 on Tuesday, I never wanted your future hubby to stop talking. Wren/Julian’s voice is like sex for my ears.
    In case you want to read my most recent rant from my Tumblr, here it is: (Not much ranting, though.) http://ianhardingfanatic.tumblr.com/post/8732087181/my-2×09-rant
    You can probably imagine that I’d be pretty darn happy on how the episode and frankly I was. VERY HAPPY. I was on twitter during it and I was going INSANE with happiness. The opening scene of the episode I was not expecting but I was buzzing by the time that the camera even zoomed up on the couple in the bed. Of course, I was jealous of Lucy Hale because she gets PAID to make out with Ian, who by the way, look absolutely GORGEOUS in this episode. Then again, he was shirtless for two of the four scenes that he was in……Anyways, (before I keep going on and on about my future husband’s hot body), it was going very well up until Facelift Jason/Ken the Barbie Doll (Oh yeah I went there) had to make a frigging appearance. I was yelling, “DREAM TRESSPASSER!!!!!!!” every time he showed up on the screen in the episode. I’ll get to Ezra and the disgustingness that is Facelift Jason/ Ken the Barbie Doll later in the comment.
    After Hanna found Lucas (where is that boy? Did he fall into the vortex AGAIN?) a girl that wasn’t her and Caleb’s hair suddenly became appealing to me, I started to root for Haleb for the first time in my life. They sort of became my third favorite couple on the show once I realized that they had feelings for one another besides, “Hi. I’m ____________.Want to go camping?” So, having Caleb suddenly leave with his sexy hair and duffel bag to go visit his deadbeat mom in California (He could have stopped by my place with his driver so then he could drop me off at Ian’s house. Just saying!) even had me, a not so sensitive critic, tearing up a little bit.
    Spencer needs to get a serious wardrobe check. Even I, a teenager who still wears Winnie the Pooh overalls, have started to question the sanity of her wardrobe designer. She’s almost a senior in high school and she is wearing a frigging pony on her sweater? Spencer, if you want to be grown up but still dress like your seven, try wearing some Winnie the Pooh overalls.
    Samara, as you know well enough, is my favorite out of Emily’s never ending list of girlfriends; she’s funny, sweet, easygoing, a good friend, and not clingy. In this episode, however, we saw a whole new side of her: PISSED OFF. And rightfully so! Emily could have found a better way to slip her number to Zoe, just like you said. It was a major face palm moment. I think I remember yelling at my TV, “EPIC FAIL, EMILY! EPIC FAIL!” Hopefully these two can work their issues out, because out of all the lesbian couples on the show (and this means a lot coming from me. I’m not homophobic but I still don’t exactly like seeing two chicks make out on my TV) they are definitely my favorite.
    Mike Montgomery is one of those people that you just hate to love. From the first time I saw him, I have been Team Mike and 31 episodes into the series that has not changed, not matter what his behavior this past season. I have two older brothers who have been sort of depressed because of a girlfriend or something before and wouldn’t get out of bed (not that you could even get them out of bed with a roar of a chainsaw when they were acting normal) so I can understand Aria’s concern. Byron also seems to know firsthand on what might happen if they don’t get Mike help.
    So, like I was saying earlier in this comment, I was pretty darn happy with how the episode turned out. I don’t really care if they were dreams or not, but Ezra and Aria were in bed together, TWICE. I was in such a Tweet happy mood at that time, I didn’t even care that Jason popped up, because he didn’t kiss Aria, because of that amazing alarm clock that woke her up (I think I could ship Arson with an alarm clock. Maybe…) Ezra was shirtless enough to get me to drool, so that is ALWAYS a good thing.
    Have I ever voiced on how much I love the other girls, especially Spencer and Emily, for always being so supportive of Aria’s forbidden relationship and even edging her on to keep on dating Ezra? Emily won some MAJOR points with me this week for telling her confused friend to find some way to reconnect with Ezra. I made a whole post on Tumblr about my newly found love for Emily: http://ianhardingfanatic.tumblr.com/post/8516226520/i-would-like-to-thank-emily-for-telling-aria-to-find. (I don’t know why people follow me on Tumblr, I really don’t. I made a post on how much I love Ezra’s hair: http://ianhardingfanatic.tumblr.com/post/8517646900/ezras-hair. How I got 40 notes on it is a mystery to me…)
    The Hollis (Sex?) scene was probably Ezria at its best since season 1. My sister was actually saying to me, “What happened to sweet Aria?” I was ignoring her until after the camera cut, because I was already multi tasking by watching screen and tweeting at the same time. It’s true though. I was a little peeved that Aria did it just to get it off of her mind, but by the time that I started to actually care, it was too late. I think you have a point, though, about not taking that next step in their relationship yet. It has been confirmed that Ezra is a NOT A VIRGIN (whoever that woman was, she is VERY LUCKY and I will forever envy her) but Aria seems to have never gone as far. Which also brings up a good point that these two must really love one another (I’ve never had any doubts) if they are waiting EVEN LONGER. It seems to me that Aria may want to take that step but Ezra wants to wait until the time is right. Let’s say it together: AWWWWWWW.
    So, Aria prepares a “gourmet meal” with vending machine food and Ezra, because he is the best boyfriend on the planet Earth, has to wonder about his girlfriend’s sudden change in behavior. Because he loves her all too much to not be concerned about her and why she is suddenly all over him like a monkey and a fresh banana.
    Cut to commercial and then your back with the couple that makes heads roll every time they lock gazes in a bed. Like I said before, after Aria said, “This was so worth the wait.” I was pretty sold on that either 1) She just kissed bye bye to her v-card or 2) She and her sexy boyfriend hadn’t had sex yet and finally. Besides that point, again, I was totally mesmerized with Ezra/Ian’s stomach (as per usual) so I wasn’t all too upset when the Mood Ruiner/Facelift Jason/Ken the Barbie Doll showed up YET AGAIN as a dream trespasser because I was too busy drooling of the mental image forever imprinted into my mind of my future hubby laying in a bad, shirtless, flexing his beautiful biceps.
    I was upset, however, when he showed up at her house and touched her arm. She must have had to go and boil it afterwards. Him touching her sent chills up my back and anger through my body. Aria really needs to get a dog, one who hates long haired former drug addict stalker types. Then the icing of the crapola cake, he pulls up beside her in his flashy sports car (He’s either a vampire gone astray or he’s selling drugs on the side. Unless the writers’ suddenly remembered that he was an Ivy League and gave him a convertible to make the storyline reappear.) and confessed his feelings for her which anyone with two eyes (Sorry, BJ. BTW if she does get her sight back, we could start calling her Policeboy Groupie. Just a suggestion…) could tell that he liked her. I mean, he eye fondles her every time he possibly can. Examples: http://pllgifs.tumblr.com/post/8362973211, http://pllgifs.tumblr.com/post/7937169073, http://pllgifs.tumblr.com/post/7890370502, http://pllgifs.tumblr.com/post/7609324259, etc, etc. (Speaking of which, he is like Pedo Ian Jr. He has a thing for Aria that is so obsessive and creepy he has to go and take pictures of her when she is asleep) He seriously needs to get a girlfriend (I have the perfect one in mine too…..Jackie Molina. I could ship Jasie/Jacson hardcore.) and keep his paws off of Aria before Ezra punches the snot out of him (we both know that under those dorky sweater vests and ties lies a man who is RIPPED.) Anyways, he kisses Aria and while I was trying not to gag and/ or attack my television, Aria pushes him away and tells Ken the Barbie Doll that she is “not available” and gets the heck out of there. Cue a major FISTPUMP in the Ezria family! I love Aria again! http://images4.fanpop.com/image/photos/19900000/Glee-Tumblr-Pics-3-adorable-glee-19998963-443-209.gif
    This episode was one of the best of the season and next week looks AWESOME. I heard that we get to see Jealous Ezzy again (I have missed him so much: http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lkambzmHGl1qfmkt6.gif. Cue the drool) and we FINALLY get to see Ezria happy by the end. I am so excited for that. So, see you then!

    • Hey there, Tigger! I’m sorry to hear about your sprained ankle. But I’m glad to see you are feeling better. (I find shirtless TV hotties are a great medicine for whatever ails you. Wouldn’t you agree? ;))

      I was definitely thinking of you during this episode. After last week’s pottery debacle, I suspect most Ezria fans were EXTREMELY RELIEVED to see Fitzy and Aria back to dancing on Planet Hot for Eachother. And, of course, no matter where your shipper heart lies, WHO DOESN’T love a good shirtless in bed, almost-sex scene? 😉 You are right about Fitzy being pretty toned underneath those sheets. He would actually make a REALLY great Superman, with his nerdish style, dark curly locks, intense eyes, contrasting with his bodybuilder physique. It’s too bad the role was already cast.

      Speaking of Superman, if Fitzy’s been able to resist sexing up Aria all this time, he ALSO has Balls of Steel . . .

      I laughed so hard at your comment about Spencer. You are right. There is a HUGE difference between wearing cartoon character clothing that is quirky, nostalgic, and adorable, and wearing dweeby kids’ clothing with anonymous ponies on it. Plus, as France mentioned in her recap, Ugly Ass Sweater was RED. This, of course, makes our heroine about as subtle as a volcano with eyes, when trying to stalk Jason, undetected.

      You know what Spencer’s sweater actually reminded me of? THIS . . .

      (She would have fit RIGHT IN!)

      As for Facelift Vampire Jason, the writers DEFINITELY forgot that Jason 1.0 went to an Ivy League school, and became a wealthy business man. I think THIS Stoner Jason inherited his wealth . . . at least, that was what I remember his Mom saying during the Fashion Show episode. (Then again, she could be lying. Vampires like Facelift Jason tend to get their wealth by mesmerizing people into giving it to them, a real touchy subject among vampire moms. :))

      Oh, and “the icing of the crapola cake” line in your comment was AWESOME. What a visual! 🙂

      Here’s hoping next week’s episode brings us plenty of shirtless fun and flirtation, from our respective DUDES (Fitzy and Wren) . . .

  6. eman

    Heyy love your recaps. I dont know if its just me but i kind of really like Jason. He was just like an ordinary annoying brother to Allison but the writers are trying to force us to think hes the killer. I just think nothing can justify the creepy pictures but still i couldnt help but cheer when he kissed her. I love ezra too but idk. And i really hope Caleb returns! Him and Hanna are my favorite couple along with Wren and Spencer! I hope this is just a 2 or 3 episode thing.

    • Hey eman! Thanks so much for stopping by and commenting.

      I agree with you that Jason is not Ali’s killer. BJ’s and Police Boy Garrett’s conversation seems to suggest that he may have been at the scene when the death happened, but was not lucid during it. Basically, he’s Toby 2.0. 🙂

      I do wonder how they will get around the pictures though. Perhaps, “A” took them?

      Oh, and don’t worry. It looks like Caleb is due to return this winter. 😉

      Ahhhh Wren! He’s, by far, favorite, as you know. I do hope they make up for lost time, by giving him a nice little storyline with Spencer, next season. Julian Morris deserves it, for sure. 🙂 (And so do we!)

  7. Oh Ezra, you may be a dweeb at times with your sweater vest collection, but at least you aren’t a skeeze like 99% of the rest of the guys in Rosewood. So why is it that I desperately want you to turn out to be A or Ali’s killer? I would love it if this show would be that ballsy. Lull us into a false sense of security of Ezzzzzzzzria, and then suddenly wake us up with a right hook to the face.

    I was reading a fan forum and someone posited the theory that Rosewood is set up like The Truman Show and A is the producer, Ali found out and got to live in the real world. It would be screwed up but kind of awesome if the four Liars were all Trumans, but differ slightly in that they are put into life/death scenarios by an audience to rival the Hunger Games in their ruthlessness. It would certainly explain the omniscience of A and the killer. It’ll never happen, obviously, but I still like the theory!

    • Oooh, these are AWESOME theories. It would be kind of awesome / ironic, if the PLL girls successfully pushed Aria to stay away from Jason, because “he’s dangerous,” when, all the while, they were pushing her BACK into the arms of Ali’s REAL killer. Not only would it be a HUGE shock to everyone, it would be REALLY fun to see Ian Harding play psychotic, even if for only an episode or two. I would love to see if he has it in him. And, much like Paul Wesley, I bet Ian’s been DYING to break out of his shell on this show, to let the world know what he can do.

      Of course, the fanbase would RIOT, and Marlene King would probably end up having to get round-the-clock security to avoid experiencing a Misery movie moment, if you catch my drift.

      Gosh, I remember watching the Truman Show for the first time, and, for like two days, becoming paranoid that my life was being controlled by television producers. (But then I realized how BORING my life is, and what an AWFUL show that would be. So, I gave it up.) You know, with America’s recent obsession with the supernatural, I suspect of PLL was a REAL Truman Show, vampires and zombies would have come to Rosewood a LONG time ago. 🙂 Then again, Creepy Pedo Ian WAS kind of a zombie. And Facelift Jason may very well be a vampire. So, maybe you aren’t that far off base. 🙂

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